Antagonize Me

by T. L Smith

  “You came?” he asks, sounding surprised. I guess it is a surprise since I’m usually at home or coming after the party to pick the girls up. I nod my head and he seems happy. He then turns back, so Katrina immediately falls back into his arms.

  I look around to see if there is anyone here I know and notice a makeshift dance floor in, what I guess, is the living room. I can feel my need taking over and my body starts moving ever so slightly to the rhythm of the song. I decided against it because most people out on the dance floor are either grinding up against each other or jumping up and down like idiots. I laugh when a guy jumps too high and knocks his head on the light fixture that is hanging low from the ceiling.

  “I love you,” I hear when I turn back to face the group. Everyone falls silent. I watch as Katrina covers her mouth and looks down at her feet. Tanner looks shocked at first and it takes me a second to realize it was her that’s spoken those words. He places a finger under her chin and lifts it up. Her eyes are filled with unshed tears, but she doesn’t take the words back.

  “I love you too,” Tanner says and everyone starts cheering. Except me. I’m shocked and stunned and most definitely hurt. Tanner’s eyes find mine as he pulls Katrina in for a hug and I manage a small smile before I turn to walk away.

  Now is probably the time to tell you I kissed him once and he kissed me. We were hanging in his room one night watching movies. This was before he got with Katrina. All of a sudden, Tanner stopped the movie and I looked at him, shocked.

  “I have to do this before I lose the nerve,” he said, and then his lips were on mine. Kissing, licking and making me swoon. I remember the look on his face when he stopped; it was happy, but mine remained shocked. Simply because I had wanted those lips on me since I first laid eyes on him. He apologized straight after and told me he would never do it again. I was still too shocked for words. My head was in dreamland and my mouth just wouldn’t operate. When I came around, he was walking out. He turned to me before he left.

  “You’re one of my best friends and I don’t want what I did to ruin it.”

  Oh God, it so didn’t, but I guess now I think about it well, yes it did. So now I don’t come around much to his house, actually hardly ever. That’s why he was surprised to see me here, and plus, I don’t usually party.

  I walk to the kitchen and try to find alcohol. I feel the need for it for some reason. Even though I know why I’m feeling this way, I’m not going to admit it to myself.

  “How sweet are they? I knew they loved each other,” Hillary says, following behind me. I don’t answer and start opening cupboards looking for the hard stuff. “What are you looking for?” she asks, as I start to pull every cupboard open.

  “Bingo,” I say and I reach for the tequila stashed at the back of the cupboard. Hillary gives me an odd look, then shrugs her shoulders.

  I end up walking back outside, far from where the happy couple are sitting on the grass and open the bottle. Hillary stands in front of me and looks annoyed. I know she won't sit on the grass, hence the reason I’m sitting on the grass.

  “You going to share?” she asks, looking down at me. I take another large gulp and hand it up to her. She reaches for it and swigs it back. I hear her cough and I laugh. She’s so uppity; I wonder why she comes to these parties. She prefers the girly drinks. Most frat parties only have beer.

  “Yuck, CJ!” she spits and looks down at me. I put the bottle back to my mouth and drink some more. “I’ll be back, I’m going to get a drink that’s more me,” she says, as her heels sink into the grass while she walks away. I watch her and the guys as they take notice when she walks past them. She’s quite beautiful, but just doesn’t want to settle down yet.

  By the time she’s back, I’ve drunk half the bottle. She asks for another sip and I hand it up to her. She gasps when she sees how much I’ve drunk and shakes her head at me. My response is a simple shrug of my shoulders.

  “No more CJ,” she says, placing the lid back on the top of the bottle.

  “What am I meant to do now?” I whine. Yes, I just whined like a child.

  “We dance!” she says excitedly and I laugh.

  “You are so dancing with me and we are going to own it by shaking our asses off… all night… looong,” she says drawing out the last word. I smile up at her and go to stand. Shit! That was a terrible idea. I now realize how much I’ve actually drunk as the alcohol starts to take full effect.

  “Shit,” Hillary says. I laugh as she reaches out to steady me. “Maybe I should just take you home,” she says softly. I look past her and see the happy couple kissing and hugging and this time I’m not going to run.

  “No, I want to dance. Do you think you can keep up?” I ask and her face turns serious. She nods and we make our way inside to where the pounding music is vibrating through my body.

  I’m so drunk, but so friggin happy I don’t care. I don’t care that since I started dancing, Hillary has been looking at me like a stranger and has now completely stopped moving. I don’t care that half-an-hour later I’m still going strong, except now I’m up on the kitchen bench, shaking and moving like from that movie Coyote Ugly. People cheer me on, but I don’t care, I’m happy and letting go. Hillary tries to yell at me to get off, but instead I pull her up so she’s up here with me. She looks stiff at first and not really sure what to do. I grab her by the waist and start shifting her hips side to side. She laughs and swats my hands away, then grabs the tequila bottle that is now on the bench and takes a swig before she starts to move sexier to the beat.

  I snatch the bottle from her and down some of it myself. I look out into the crowd and they all seem to blur into one.

  “This is so much fun!” Hillary screams next to me while she sways her hips. An old and classic song comes on; it’s ‘5, 6, 7, 8’ by Steps and I know the moves to this dance by heart. I practiced this in my mirror for weeks on end. When they start to sing a verse I know well, I kick my feet out and then drop my body, so my ass is nearly touching the bench. Hillary tries to keep up and copy the moves, but she fails miserably and laughs it off. I smile and turn my back to her so I slide down the front of her body, then swing my hips back and forth on the way back up. Men start to cheer and I take it further, slowly lifting up my shirt to show my midriff, then dropping it again as it reaches my belly button. I turn to face Hillary and watch as she starts to climb down. I’m too numb to care, so I reach for her, snatch the bottle from her grasp and chug a little more down.

  At one stage during the night, once I’d finished on the bench, I walk to the toilet and notice Tanner and Katrina dancing on the floor. It makes me angry; God only knows why their relationship bothers me so much. I knew I had feelings for him and I thought for a second he did too, but not long after our kiss he started seeing Katrina. Katrina knew in her heart that I liked him, but I never denied nor confirmed it for her.

  I walk back to the dance floor and pass the kitchen as I do, grabbing the bottle of tequila. I make my way through the throngs of people and stop when I see all the guys from the football team at the edge of the floor eyeing the girls dancing. I smile to myself and make my way over to them. Locky notices me first and pulls me into a massive bear hug. I squeal at him as he puts me down. “CJ!” he greets me, smiling down at me. He is massive, probably the biggest on the team. He reminds me of a teddy bear, a very large and overgrown teddy bear, that is.

  “We are going to dance,” I say and grab for his hand. He looks a bit puzzled at me; probably because I just slurred my words.

  He shakes his head. “I have no moves, baby girl, I have no rhythm,” he says chuckling. Lance, another guy from the team, steps up and tells me he’ll dance with me. I nod my head as I pull him out with one hand, my other hand still wrapped tightly around my bottle. I don’t mind Lance, except his handsy hands. I usually have to remind him where to keep them and not in a nice way either. Other than that, he’s a nice sort of bloke and has always been friendly toward me.

  “You looked sexy da
ncing up there,” he says, referring to the kitchen. I just nod my head and continue to make my moves on the dance floor. He shakes his head at me and leans down. “Since when do you dance? Or drink for that matter?” he asks, sounding interested.

  I don’t want to talk. Why does everyone want to talk once they have alcohol in their system?

  I turn my back to him and start moving more. I feel hands on my hips and I lean back into them. I’m met with a hard body that feels a lot larger than Lance’s small frame. I turn my head to see Kyrone smiling down at me. I jump away from him so fast he looks shocked, then he laughs it off. I start to walk away, but he captures my wrist in his overly large calloused hands.

  “Where you going, Christina?” he asks smugly. I look around and point. Fuck! I don’t even know where I’m pointing and to that he laughs. I snatch my hand back, take off back to the kitchen and chug down the last of the alcohol.

  Tanner spots me and makes his way to the kitchen, smiling when he gets to me. “You having fun?” he asks with a smile across his lips.

  “Yep,” I say like I actually am. His face turns serious, and just when he goes to say something, two hands wrap around his midsection.

  “Tanner, why did you leave?” Katrina whines in his ear. I make a face at her voice and Tanner quietly smirks at me. He turns to say something to her and as he does, I make my escape back to the overcrowded dance floor, swaying as I do.

  Shit! I really am fucked.

  I nearly fall over when two hands wrap around my waist from the back and pull me back so I’m standing upright. I turn to thank the person when I realize who it is… again. Fucking Kyrone! My face turns red in anger. He notices, then picks me up and throws me over his shoulder. I scream at him to let me down and he slaps my ass, hard. I immediately stop so he won’t do that again and he notices straight away.

  “You liked that,” he says, chuckling to himself and starts walking up the stairs away from the music. I’m almost asleep on his shoulder when I hear the click of a door open and shut.

  “You will not touch me,” I squeak out, weaker than I wanted. Sleepiness is taking over my body.

  “Too late,” he whispers and taps my ass a little softer this time. He throws me onto the bed and my eyes automatically close. I hear rustling around and feel my body being moved, but I really couldn’t care less right about now. The bed I’m in is so comfortable, I feel like I could never leave.

  “Kyrone, you’re a douche,” I mumble into a pillow.

  I wake with my head hanging off the bed, my body still positioned on it. I don’t open my eyes at first because my head hurts way too much. When I do, I see Kyrone sitting on the floor right next to my face with his head back on the bed. I look around and realize where I am. Shit! I drank too much last night. I go to move and notice I don’t have on my top; only my sports bra remains, but my jeans are still on. Thank God!

  I sit up and wonder what I should do. I glance at Kyrone’s sleeping head and decide to kick it. His head drops to the side and he jumps straight up, holding his hand where my foot landed.

  “Did you…” He stops so he’s facing me clearly. “Did you just kick me?” he asks in an unbelieving tone.

  “Yes, you baboon. Why am I here? With you?” I almost spit out the last two words. He shakes his head and stretches. I watch as his shirt rises so I can see his “V” and start to think about licking it. Shit! I mentally slap myself again. Anyone but Kyrone.

  “Well, dancing queen,” he says, chuckling at himself. “You were way too intoxicated, and someone had to stop you before you went overboard… well, more than you already did.”

  I laugh at him. I wasn’t that bad, was I?

  “Oh, and plus, you couldn’t keep your hands off me,” he says turning serious, then smirking. “Not that I blame you and all.” He winks as he walks off to the cupboard.

  “Please tell me you did not undress me,” I plead.

  “Well, the shirt and shoes, I did,” he tells me as he pulls his shirt off and chucks it into the hamper. He looks back to me while I ogle his toned and sexy body. “Went for the pants and as I came to the zipper, I kind of realized that you don’t wear underwear.” He looks up to me for an explanation. “Not that I minded,” he says throwing on a clean shirt. “Can you please explain that? ‘Cause I’d really like to know how often that happens.”

  “None of your damn business,” I mutter, standing and looking for a shirt, any shirt will do. “I threw it,” he says watching me looking around for my clothes.

  “Why? That’s one of my favorite shirts,” I whine.

  “Here,” he says and tosses me one of his football jerseys. I pull it on and, as I do, my eyes reach him and I see him taking me in.

  “Stop looking,” I mumble.

  “I took a photo, didn’t you say it lasts longer?” he chuckles, referring to my shirt.

  “You better not have!” My anger starts to rise at him and at this situation. “I can't believe I slept on your bed. I’m gonna have to scrub myself clean. God knows what I might catch,” I say, picking up my shoes.

  “Don’t flatter yourself, no one sleeps in here,” he says, looking quite offended.

  “Yeah right, you’re like the male slut of the school,” I huff at him. Does he think I live under a rock?

  “Yes, but not in my room. No one comes in here,” he reiterates, opening the door for me to leave. He waves his hand indicating it’s time for me to go and I do, without looking back.

  I make it back to the dorms that are very quiet this morning. Once I’ve showered and dressed, I go meet the girls at the local café. I honestly don’t know how they have the energy to get up and function like normal people this early in the morning, especially after the night we’ve all had.

  As I walk in, I see the girls instantly, but what I wasn’t expecting was to see all the football players with them. I groan when I see the black hair that belongs to Kyrone and make my way over. I look for an open chair, and to my luck, it’s right next to Tanner who’s sitting next to Katrina, of course.

  “How are you feeling?” Tanner asks as I sit down. I groan in response and sit back lower in my seat.

  Hillary looks up at me. “Why didn’t you tell me you could dance?” she asks and the table goes quiet.

  “Fuck yeah, you have moves baby!” Lance yells out from the end of the table. I look around and see all eyes are on me, including Kyrone’s, which have a hint of amusement in them.

  “I don’t,” I say and grab the menu.

  “I call bullshit!” Locky yells out and then winks.

  “She has the moves that’s for sure,” Kyrone chips in.

  “Shut up,” I fire back at him. They all laugh and I look at Tanner to see a confused look on his face.

  “What did I miss?” he asks sounding surprised.

  “A fucking lot but, in particular, your girl down there that has been hiding those crazy hips from us,” Locky says and winks again.

  “You dance?” he asks focusing his attention on me. I shrug in response and don’t answer.

  “She moves like a goddess,” Hillary chips in.

  “Okay seriously, I have a hangover. Change the subject,” I whine.

  “I have pictures!” Kyrone shouts so I can hear him perfectly. I sit up straight and shoot him a look that says if he dares I may hunt him down and kill him.

  “Can we talk later?” Tanner whispers in my ear. I turn my head and when I do I catch Kyrone’s eyes on me. I look to Tanner and nod my head in answer to his question.

  I leave before everyone else does and make my way across campus. Just as I’m at my dorm, Tanner calls out to me. I turn around and don’t see anyone with him. He jogs up and then continues to walk alongside me as I make my way to my room.

  “So you had fun, I hear,” he says, looking at the ground. I shrug my shoulders and he looks at me. “I didn’t know you could dance,” he says, sounding surprised.

  “Yeah,” I mumble, not wanting to go into a conversation with him abou
t it. “Congrats to you and Katrina, next step with the relationship,” I say smiling at him, trying to hide my discomfort.

  “Yeah,” he says reaching up and rubbing the back of his head.

  “What’s wrong?” I stop at my door and unlock it. He looks like he’s not sure what to say. “I just don’t know, you know? My feelings are mixed.”

  “Oh,” I say, not meeting his eyes. I’m positively way too hung over to hear this. I don’t need hope when I know nothing will happen. He chose her, and even though I want him, I know he chose her.

  “Don’t you think you should talk to her about this?” I suggest. He looks up at me and makes his way into my room. I fall onto my bed, but luckily my head hits the pillow. I feel him lay next to me and I try to breathe. He literally takes my breath away.

  “I don’t want to hurt her, but I kind of had to say it because she said it in front of everyone. What was I meant to do?” he huffs pulling one of my pillows out from under my head so he can lie on it.

  “I think you should talk to her about this,” I say, wanting this conversation to end.

  “Yeah, you’re probably right, but I wanted your opinion first. You’re one of my best friends, CJ.” I give in, I always do to him. He could make me jump off a cliff if he asked. I wonder if he knows the things he can do to me or make me do?

  “I just gave it, Tanner. Do you love her?” I ask, not wanting to hear the answer. He looks at me, his face searching mine. For what? I’m not sure.

  “I like her a lot. She’s kind, beautiful and our parents are friends.” Oh, I didn’t know that. “My mother expects me to marry her, already. Well, not right now, but they practically hint at it whenever we are in a room together.” I cringe. I knew he and Katrina came from money and that their parents have high expectations for them.