by Bree Wolf
Checking the baby’s throat, which was easy enough to do as it stood wide open as he wailed, Evelyn detected a tinge of redness. “His throat looks a bit sore,” she said calmly so as not to scare the already frightened mother. “Do you nurse him yourself?”
Lady Northfield nodded. “After he was born, I couldn’t seem to part with him,” she said almost apologetically.
Evelyn gently squeezed the lady’s hand. “I do believe that it is best for a child to be nursed by its mother. It strengthens their bond.”
A soft smile came to Lady Northfield’s lips, and her eyes misted. “I always felt so, too.”
Then the door opened, and the maid returned, quickly depositing the bowl of water and sponge on the bedside table. “Is there anything else you require, my lady?”
“No, thank you, Agnes.”
The maid nodded and left.
“Is he not getting cold?” Lady Northfield asked, worried eyes on her half-clad son. “People always stress how important it is to keep a baby warm.”
Evelyn nodded. “It is, but he is already running a fever, and we must take care that he does not overheat. Here, feel his feet. Are they cold?”
The young mother gently wrapped her hands around her baby’s little feet. Then she looked at Evelyn, a hint of surprise in her eyes. “They’re not. They’re warm.”
Evelyn smiled at the young woman. “I think you should nurse him.”
“Now? But his next feeding is not due for another hour.”
Evelyn tried to keep her features relaxed as the baby’s wails continued on. “When a child is ill, the normal routine no longer matters.”
Lady Northfield nodded and with practised fingers unlaced her dress. Then she settled into the cushioned armchair by the window and held out her arms to receive her son.
The moment she put him to her breast, the wails stopped, and the child drank hungrily, his little fists finally stilling. “He’s nursing,” his mother exclaimed, joy clear on her face. “I never thought he would. He was so agitated.”
Coming to stand next to mother and child, Evelyn smiled down on them. “He was agitated because you were, my lady. Children often feel their parents’ unease and respond to it with their own. Try to calm down and relax as much as you can. Take deep breaths. In and out. Slowly.”
Holding her child, Lady Northfield closed her eyes and then slowly inhaled and exhaled until her features seemed to relax. Then she opened her eyes once more, a grateful smile playing on her lips. “Thank you.”
Evelyn nodded, then turned and collected the bowl and sponge from the bedside table. Kneeling down by Lady Northfield’s feet, she sat the small basin beside her and dipped the sponge in. Then she gently ran the sponge along the child’s heated arms and legs.
Not impressed in the least, the little boy kept nursing, his eyes closing as he relaxed.
“He is usually not so hungry,” Lady Northfield said, her gaze focused on her son’s calm face. “I wouldn’t have thought that mere nursing would relax him so.”
Evelyn smiled. “It is normal during a fever as his body tries to stay hydrated. From the looks of it, he might also have a sore throat, and I’ve often seen infants calm down when nursing. Perhaps it is the soothing contact or the fluids running down their throat, reducing the pain. I often wonder if there might be something in a mother’s milk that soothes the throat.”
Sighing, Lady Northfield nodded. “But what caused it? You said he is not gravely ill, didn’t you?”
“I think he will be fine,” Evelyn reassured the young woman. “He is already cooling down. Feel his forehead.”
Placing her hand on her son’s head, Lady Northfield exhaled a sigh of relief. “He is, isn’t he?” She turned grateful eyes to Evelyn. “Thank you so much. I cannot say how…”
“There is no need,” Evelyn assured her. “Neither is there reason to seek blame. You are a good mother to him. Never doubt that.” Holding Lady Northfield’s gaze, Evelyn nodded to her. “Children respond to all kinds of influences, especially this young. It might have been the excitement of your journey, the unfamiliar environment and people. It is very likely that he is simply overwhelmed. Some children handle change easily while others have a hard time. We’re not all the same.” Thinking of her husband, Evelyn smiled. “I suggest you keep him with you as much as you can. He feels safe with you and will learn that everything is all right.”
“I will,” Lady Northfield breathed, brushing a gentle hand over her son’s sleeping face. “He looks so peaceful.”
“He is,” Evelyn replied. “He’s in your arms. The safest place he knows. Why should he not be peaceful?”
Lady Northfield smiled at her, and for a moment, her eyes closed.
“You should lie down,” Evelyn suggested gently. “You need sleep as well.”
“What if he wakes up? What if he cries again? What if–?”
“Keep him with you,” Evelyn said, urging the young mother slowly to her feet. “As long as he is near you, he will be fine.”
As Lady Northfield settled onto the bed, lying on the side and embracing her child, her son stretched out a little arm as though waving his fist at the disruption of his sleep. A moment later, though, he settled back into her arms and was lost to the world.
“Close your eyes,” Evelyn instructed as she placed some pillows on the far side of the bed in case the child rolled out of his mother’s arms. “He will be fine, and you will need your strength.”
Lady Northfield nodded and closed her eyes.
“If you need anything, call out,” Evelyn said. “There will be someone waiting outside your door.”
Already half-asleep, Lady Northfield mumbled her agreement before her breathing came to match that of her son’s and she was fast asleep.
With a last smile, Evelyn stepped from the room to find her husband waiting outside the door.
Chapter Twenty-Six – Overwhelmed
The moment his wife stepped over the threshold, Richard felt his heart thudding in his chest so strongly that it nearly knocked him off his feet. Not only had he missed her–actually missed her! – during the brief hour she had tended to Lady Northfield’s son, but more than anything he had also wanted to see her tend to her patient. He wanted to know the woman she was when she used her abilities to take care of others. Had she not herself said that it was who she was? That she could never be herself if she could not treat those around her?
Now, they were married, and yet, Richard did not know that side of her.
“Why are you here?” Evelyn asked after closing the door quietly behind her. Her brows were pulled down a fraction of an inch, and Richard stopped.
How did she interpret his presence here? Did she think that…?
He frowned, wondering how to best address her when she spoke up first.
“I can see that you’re confused,” she sighed, “although I don’t know about what. But I need to tell you honestly that I am…worried that you’re here because you fear I may not be capable enough to –”
“No!” Now that he knew what she was thinking, Richard knew exactly what to say. “I never thought that. Not for a moment,” he assured her, his gaze holding hers, willing her to believe him. When he thought to see a hint of doubt on her face, he reached for her hands. “I am here because I suddenly find myself…craving your company.” He gritted his teeth as the words left his lips, as he felt the defences around his heart come down, making him vulnerable.
For a long moment, she looked up at him, her brown eyes searching his face before she slowly exhaled a breath and a radiant smile transformed her face. “You do?” she whispered, a touch of awe in her voice.
Closing his eyes briefly, Richard exhaled a rushed breath. “It would seem I do. I cannot help it.”
“Neither can I.” Squeezing his hands, she stepped closer, her gaze once more on his, once more inquisitive. “Does it bother you?”
Richard swallowed. “A little.”
“Why?”
“Bec
ause I never wanted to be dependent on another.” The words flew from Richard’s mouth before he had any chance of thinking them through. Still, it might be for the best, for if he had allowed himself to consider all repercussions, he might not have found the courage to answer her honestly.
“It is a risk, is it not? To one’s heart and happiness?” his wife said, her eyes full of compassion and understanding that Richard wondered about his ability to read her. How was it that he suddenly felt beyond the shadow of a doubt that she understood him? That she did not hold his words against him?
“I thank you for speaking so honestly,” Evelyn said, gently placing her hand on his cheek. “I hope we will always be able to speak to each other thus.”
Richard nodded.
“Come,” Evelyn said, pulling him with her as she stepped down the corridor. “I need to speak to Lady Northfield’s family. They’ll be worried.”
Again, Richard nodded. “Is the boy all right?”
“I think he will be.” As she walked with her arm looped through his, Richard felt her hand close more tightly around his arm, and she exhaled a slow breath. “Infants are always very susceptible to infections. It seems people obtain their resilience over time. Still, the boy does not seem gravely ill. I’ve often seen infants who have a high temperature for a day or two and then the fever breaks and they are perfectly fine.” Lifting her head, she smiled at him. “I’m not worried. He’ll be fine.”
Relief washed over Richard, knowing how precious that little boy was to his friend’s family. “Thank you for what you did.” He smiled at her. “I saw how calm you were when you spoke to the dowager and Lady Northfield. You reminded me of your father. You have the same calm and gentle authority he does. You seemed very competent.”
Stopping in her tracks, she turned to him and he barely had a moment to notice that her eyes were brimming with tears before she flung herself into his arms, her body shuddering with silent sobs.
“What’s wrong?” Richard asked, feeling his heart tightening in his chest. “Did I say something wrong?” What had he done? He had merely tried to pay her a compliment, an honest compliment. How had he ruined even this?
“Nothing,” his wife sniffled before stepping back. Wiping at her eyes, she smiled at him. “You did nothing wrong. I was just…overwhelmed. I had no idea how much it would mean to me to hear you say that.” Pushing herself up on the tips of her toes, she placed a gentle kiss on his lips. “Thank you.”
As though in a daze, Richard nodded, his eyes fixed on her beautiful face, so vibrant and alive with emotions. Emotions she had for him. It had been his words that had put that smile on her face, that had touched her heart. His opinion that mattered to her.
He mattered to her.
It was a thought as overwhelming as no other he had encountered before.
Still musing about how on earth he had managed to win her heart, Richard followed her downstairs. Transfixed, he watched her speak to Maxwell and instruct him to tell Agnes to sit outside Lady Northfield’s chamber in case she needed help. She spoke kindly but with authority, and Richard was pleased to see her words obeyed without hesitation.
When they finally stepped into the drawing room, his wife was instantly swarmed by worried mothers, brothers and sisters, all begging her to tell them that their precious little boy would be well again. Quickly relieving their fears, Evelyn also gave stern instructions not to disturb mother and child. “They’re both sleeping now, which is good because they need their rest. As hard as it is to give them time alone, it is what they need.”
Everyone nodded their agreement, and Richard’s chest swelled with pride. In that moment, he could not remember why he had ever thought it a disadvantage that his wife was a doctor.
After all, she was magnificent.
And he was clearly not the only one who thought so.
Chapter Twenty-Seven – Another's Turn
Inhaling a deep breath of the crisp morning air, Evelyn marvelled at the changes her life had undergone recently. Not only had she left behind her old home, but she had also become a wife, a daughter, a sister. She had found a new family. A family her father had wanted for her. A family her father had known would be a good fit for her.
As she walked deeper into the snow-covered garden, Evelyn smiled, realising that she no longer held a grudge when she thought of her father’s agreement with the late Lord Ashwood. Although she still wished he had consulted her, she knew that she would not have listened. Her pride would not have allowed her, and so in the end, her father had known best after all.
Now, she was happy. Happier than she ever would have thought possible. Not only did her new husband care for her, which in itself was a dream come true, but he also seemed to warm to the thought of her being the doctor she knew herself to be. Could she ask for more?
Love, a small voice whispered. Trust.
The snow crunched under her feet as Evelyn strolled onward, her thoughts returning to the man she now called husband. Indeed, he had confessed that he cared for her, and yet, he had not spoken of love. Truth be told, neither had she.
And what of trust? Certainly, he had come to trust her to a certain degree, but Evelyn still felt as though his trust had limits. Would he trust her with his life? Or would he hesitate to put his well-being in her hands? Would he have doubts?
Evelyn sighed, brushing a lone snowflake off her cheek. “If only I knew.”
“If only you knew what?”
Spinning around, Evelyn glimpsed her husband coming around an evergreen hedge, a gentle smile on his face as he beheld her. The grey in his eyes sparkled in the bright morning light, and Evelyn felt her heartbeat quicken at the mere sight of him.
Was this love? She wondered. Did he feel it as well?
“If only you knew what?” he repeated as he came to stand before her, his hands wrapping around hers as though they belonged there. His eyes lingered on her face as they always did, trying to understand what was going on in her heart and mind.
Evelyn drew in a deep breath. “I–”
“Is it the boy?” her husband interrupted, tension gripping his shoulders. “My mother said that he was fine, that the fever was gone.”
Evelyn nodded. “He is fine. There is no reason for concern. Do not worry.”
Her husband exhaled a relieved breath. “Then what brought you out here into the cold?”
For a moment, Evelyn considered answering honestly. However, then courage failed her when she realised that his latest question had given her a way out. “I was thinking about your sister,” she said instead, noting with a hint of annoyance the way his eyes moved from hers as though he faulted her for bringing this subject to his attention once again.
“This is not what I came to speak to you about,” he said, his tone a bit brusque as he spoke. Then he took a step back, his hands sliding from hers.
Evelyn felt her body tense. “Then what did you come to speak to me about?” she asked with the same hint of reproach she had heard from him.
His shoulders slumped, and when he raised his chin to look at her, his eyes held a mixture of longing and vulnerability, which instantly softened Evelyn’s heart.
Swallowing her own irritation, she stepped toward him. “I’m sorry,” she said softly, a gentle smile on her lips. “I did not mean to speak to you thus. Please tell me what you came to speak to me about.”
Richard inhaled a long breath. “I am sorry as well,” he said as his features relaxed. “I should not have lashed out at you. Of course, you are free to speak your mind.”
“Thank you.” Glad to hear these words, Evelyn placed a hand on his arm, her eyes seeking his. “But now it is your turn to speak your mind.”
An amused smile curled up the corners of his mouth, and for a split second, his gaze drifted lower, touching her lips. “Will we forever take turns?” he asked chuckling.
Evelyn shrugged, feeling her heart grow lighter. “I do not know. Would it be so bad?”
He shook his head. “Not
at all. However, I’m afraid I might not always remember whose turn it is, especially if we add to the things we take turns for.”
Evelyn laughed, wondering if this truly bothered him or if it was simply an enjoyable way of teasing one another. “Fine. I admit I expressed myself poorly. It is not your turn to speak, but you are free to do so nonetheless. There, better?”
His gaze lingered on hers just like the soft smile lingered on his lips. It seemed as though he had all but forgotten the world around him, so still had he become. Only his dark grey eyes sparkling in the early morning sun betrayed the depth of the emotions that lived just below the surface of his calm exterior.
“Richard?” Evelyn whispered, her own brown eyes searching his as she gently put a hand on his chest. “Are you all right?”
In the next instant, his hands reached for her, sweeping her into his embrace. A small gasp escaped Evelyn before his mouth closed over hers, kissing her with a passion she had never known before. What had brought this on? She wondered. After all, neither one of them had confessed their love. Had they not simply spoken of trivial matters?
When he pulled back, his eyes shone even brighter as he looked down at her, a touch of awe on his face. “You truly understand me,” he whispered.
Evelyn smiled when she finally understood the source of this passionate encounter. “I try,” she whispered back, smiling up at him. “As do you.”
Richard nodded, his gaze holding hers as though time stood still, and they could remain locked in each other’s arms forever. “I came here,” he finally said, “to share something with you. Something of myself. Just as you shared something with me the other day.”
Evelyn inhaled a shuddering breath, feeling the weight of his words all the way to her soul. Had she truly gained his trust that he would open up to her? That he would tell her something he had never shared with another before?
Her husband swallowed, a hint of doubt on his face. “All my life,” he began, his arms tightening on her as though she gave him the strength to speak, “I felt as though I did not belong. I don’t know if you can understand what it feels like to see the world unlike those around you.” He licked his lips. “It’s…it’s as though people speak of the sky as blue, and yet, you can see with your own eyes that it is green. You try to see what they see, but in the end, it is still green no matter how hard you try to will it to be blue.” He scoffed, shaking his head in defeat. “At some point, I gave up and accepted that this was not a world made for me, that I was merely a guest, a curiosity to those who called it home.”
