The Stranger's Woes

by Max Frei

  “Really? All right then, Melifaro, you can wait on Pafoota Jongo. We’ll get the other three. On the double, okay?”

  “Of course.”

  I raised my eyes to greet Melifaro, but he had already disappeared. I just caught a glimpse of an aloe-colored looxi at the end of the corridor. I looked at Juffin.

  “Pull yourself together, Max,” he said. “We’ve got a lot of work ahead of us. If your grief could help Shixola, I would personally help you stay sad as long as possible. But it’s absolutely pointless.”

  “Remember the breathing exercises, Max,” Lonli-Lokli said. “It’s the perfect time.”

  “Right. I’m sorry, fellows.”

  I tried to gather my wits about me. I have to admit, after doing Lonli-Lokli’s famous breathing exercises for less than a minute, the invisible barrier that separated me from the World dissolved. A few minutes later, I was myself again. I was by no means lighthearted, but at least I could imagine the possibility.

  “This resurrector of corpses, or whatever you call him, was he actually here in the House by the Bridge?” I said. “Then it should be no problem to find him. He’s alive, and he leaves a trace.”

  “As if he’d be foolish enough to show his face here,” Juffin said with mild contempt. “He doesn’t need to go through the trouble. A good magician can use a sensitive medium as his instrument. Distance presents no obstacle to him. And in our Headquarters there was one outstanding medium, to my profound regret. Shixola had to open this sinning door and set Jiffa free. Naturally, no one but myself can open the secret door and remain alive. But that suited the one who gave orders to our Captain just fine.”

  “I see. Poor Melamori. She’s not in for a good night’s sleep now, is she?”

  “Melamori?” Juffin frowned. “Yes, Max, she’s probably the only one who can go after Jiffa. We can lighten her load, though. It will be far easier for her to trail Jiffa’s Master than—”

  “Maybe it’s even simpler than that. Jiffa is very attached to his lair, isn’t he? Maybe he just went back home again.”

  “Perhaps. Then again, perhaps not. Let’s wait for Melifaro. I hope—”

  “There’s no use hoping,” Melifaro said, storming back into the office like a green whirlwind. Who would have thought that fellow knew how to frown, too?

  “Why is it no use?” Juffin seemed surprised. “Let’s hear it.”

  “The buriwoks in the Main Archive claim that Bubuli Jola Giox, Atva Kuraisa, and Joffla Kumbaya are all dead. They died at different times, naturally, but all over the course of the past few years. Then I asked about Pafoota Jongo. Also dead, just a dozen days ago!”

  “It’s easy to check. Sir Shurf, send a call to your old mate,” Juffin ordered.

  “He truly is no longer among the living,” Lonli-Lokli told us a few seconds later. “I’m sure of it. Shall I contact his wife? She might tell us something.”

  “Yes, go ahead.” Juffin gripped the left armrest of his chair spasmodically. There was a resounding crunch when the thick piece of wood gave way. Juffin glared angrily at the fragments of the armrest and tossed them into a corner.

  “At least I learned about the other members of the Great Royal Hunt in the Magaxon Forest,” Melifaro said, looking timidly at Juffin, as if calculating how close he could approach without risk to life and limb.

  “Dead?” Juffin asked indifferently.

  “Yep, all of them. Isn’t that what you expected?”

  “Of course. Have the causes of death been established?”

  “I don’t know. Their deaths appear to have been natural. No one suspected otherwise, or they would have turned to us.”

  “Perhaps they turned to the police.”

  “Yikes! What a dunderhead I am.” Melifaro clutched his head in mock despair. “Hold on.” He disappeared into the corridor again.

  “Have you managed to find out what happened to your former friend, Shurf?” Juffin asked, drumming his fingers on the table.

  Lonli-Lokli raised the hand encased in the enormous glove, giving us to understand that his conversation in Silent Speech was not yet over. Juffin shrugged in annoyance, but a moment later his curiosity was satisfied.

  “Pafoota’s widow says it was an accident,” Lonli-Lokli said. “He had had a bit too much to drink at a family celebration, went to the bathroom, fell down the stairs, and broke his back. A rather stupid way to die, I’d say.”

  “An accident, was it? This could be interesting,” Juffin said, growing more animated. “Well, let’s wait for Melifaro. He’ll tell us something. But I’m already starting to figure it out, I think.” He turned sharply to me. “What about you, Max? What do you think?”

  “Many actual dead bodies, the former Junior Magicians of various Orders of Magic, comrades in the Great Royal Hunt in the Magaxon Forest—and among them, one imposter. He didn’t die first, and he didn’t die last. The causes of death didn’t raise any suspicions. The family grieves. Everything is as tight as a drum. Is this what you mean?”

  “Precisely,” Juffin said. “What a mind you have—unbelievable! Hold your head high. It’s your right. You’ve already improved my mood considerably. Now do something about your own. You’ll need to soon enough. I want you to finish the job you began at the request of poor Shixola.”

  “I do, too.”

  I have to admit, I wasn’t sure that I was up to the task. But I’m never sure of my own abilities. Right then, though, I wasn’t in the least inclined to advertise my charming modesty and fish for compliments from Sir Juffin. Anyway, he always has plenty of them at hand at such moments. Hell, I myself was sure I had to close this case. Somehow.

  “It’s good to know that you want to yourself. But Sir Shurf has some objections of a metaphysical nature, doesn’t he?”

  “No,” Lonli-Lokli said evenly. “If you both think everything will be all right, I have no objections.”

  “Go home, Max,” Juffin said. “Wash up, pack only the most indispensable things, and dress in something comfortable and inconspicuous. Oh, and don’t forget your talisman. There’s no guarantee that you’ll be sleeping at home tonight. Come back in two hours, no later. I’ll call Melamori. I hope she had time to rest. In any case, the sooner you can start the better.”

  “Okay, I’ll be back in no time.”

  I thought that someone sitting in the windowsill on the first floor of a building shouldn’t have to wander through the corridors and passageways looking for doors. So I just turned around, stuck my legs through the open window, and jumped down onto the mosaic sidewalk of the Street of Copper Pots. It was only three or four feet to the ground, but for some reason the jump affected me like an electric shock. The unpleasant sensation stopped almost immediately, but I was discombobulated in the extreme. It was as though I were observing from the outside how my feet took one step after the other. Time passed unbearably slowly, as if it took an eternity for me to execute these few little steps.

  “Max!”

  I turned around. Juffin appeared in the window and beckoned to me. I had to go back.

  “My congratulations, wonder boy!”

  “Meaning?” I stared at him, uncomprehending.

  “It’s just that it’s impossible to pass through this window. You can’t enter through it, either. Did you really think there would be just an ordinary window in my office? Magicians only know what would crawl in! But you did it. So please accept my congratulations.”

  “Why did you tell me that? Just so I’d know, or because you wanted to congratulate me?”

  “Both. But the main thing is that it’s a good sign, Max. If you were able to jump onto the street through my window, I think you can be very confident that everything else will be just fine.”

  “I am confident. I have no more strength to worry. Sometimes I feel that nothing more is left of me, so there’s nothing to worry with.”

  “That’s a good state of mind to be in, lad,” Juffin said, winking at me. “Just the one you’ll need.”


  “Excellent.”

  I squeezed the semblance of smile out of myself and went to my amobiler. The boss was still following me with his eyes. The back of my head even started burning under his powerful gaze.

  The first thing I did when I got home was to undress and head for a bathing pool. The cats stared at me cautiously from the far corner of the living room. I didn’t seem to inspire them with much confidence. Oh boy!

  In the fourth bathing pool, I suddenly relaxed. It was as if someone had flipped an invisible switch. I became myself again, with all the attendant consequences. I felt my nerves tighten, then slacken almost immediately. I was about to start bemoaning the death of the brave Captain Shixola. I was on the verge of tears, but then I thought about how I needed to search for the dead Jiffa in the company of Lady Melamori, and I cheered up. Then I thought about the same thing a bit longer and grew sad again. In short, I was the same as I always was.

  Congratulating myself on my return, I crawled out of the bathing pool and went up to the living room. Armstrong and Ella padded up to me and rubbed against my ankles, purring loudly. I scooped them up in my arms, buried my nose in their soft fur, and gave in to a sense of relief. A tear rolled down my cheek. I shook my head indignantly, pulled myself together, and headed for the bedroom to get ready. By the time I was on the stairs I felt an unpleasant wetness on my left cheek.

  Stop it, this minute! I commanded myself. Or else.

  Or else what? The inner voice sounded terribly sarcastic.

  I’ll punch you in the nose! I was pitiless.

  Go ahead! It’ll be all the worse for you. It’s your nose!

  I couldn’t keep up this idiocy any longer, and I burst out laughing. Long live the split personality—the shortest path to spiritual equilibrium!

  Half an hour later, I tossed my half-empty traveling bag into the back seat of the amobiler. It held a change of clothes and a pack of cigarettes. A valuable bottle of Elixir of Kaxar rested in the pocket of my looxi. The kerchief of the Grand Magician of the Order of the Secret Grass I wrapped around my neck, just in case. There was a good chance I would forget to put it on before I went to sleep after a day like this. Everything else I planned to look for in the Chink between Worlds, if need be. I had to keep in shape.

  In fifteen minutes I was already at the House by the Bridge. I approached the open window of Juffin’s office. For a moment I just stood there, trying to figure out what I was feeling. I had no wish to repeat my recent exploit, so I went around to the side of the Ministry of Perfect Public Order and entered like all ordinary employees: through the Secret Entrance.

  To my surprise, Sir Juffin Hully was sitting in his office in absolute solitude.

  “Has everyone taken early retirement?” I said. “They decided their health was more important to them?”

  “Finally you sound like the old Max,” Juffin said, visibly relieved. “How did you manage, if it’s no secret?”

  “I took a bath, cried, and threatened to punch myself in the nose. A great method. You should try it.”

  “The third step would have been enough,” Juffin said caustically. “You have an amazing capacity for going overboard. Okay, let’s get down to business. Melifaro investigated the matter of the premature deaths of the Junior Magicians with the police. All well and good, but—”

  “But they were simple accidents? All the former Magaxon Forest huntsmen died of natural causes? There’s nothing to grab onto?”

  “You guessed it. But there still may be something ‘to grab onto,’ as you put it. In two cases, the faces were terribly battered: Sir Atva Kuraisa from the Order of Grilles and Mirrors and Sir Joffla Kumbaya from the Order of the Sleeping Butterfly. The corpse of Atva Kuraisa was identified by his sister Tanna. No relatives were found for Joffla Kumbaya. He was a recluse, so a courier from the Merry Little Skeletons who delivered food to him had to identify him. Both Magicians had equal chances of being our clients. The Order of Grilles and Mirrors and the Order of the Sleeping Butterfly were very strong organizations in their time, so their Junior Magicians could easily have had some horrific secrets in their possession.”

  “Did someone send them a call? That’s the simplest way of finding out whether a person is alive or dead. Or am I wrong?”

  “No, you’re not wrong, but a good Magician is capable of opting out of Silent Speech. He can create a sturdy shield, a perfect imitation of death, so that rule doesn’t hold here. In short, you and Melamori will have to find Jiffa. I think they are together. If you’re lucky, you’ll find the trace of the Master next to Jiffa’s. Then you’ll be able to pick it up since you’ve already learned how. Give the bastard what he’s got coming to him!”

  “Yes. He deserves it, and it’s for a good cause. By the way, why didn’t you ever teach me how, Juffin?”

  “Because I don’t have to teach you,” Juffin said. “To be honest, I just wanted to spare your nervous system. You learn too fast as it is.”

  “I agree with you a hundred percent,” I said with a weary sigh. “Everything happens too fast. Maybe it’s because where I come from we don’t live very long. And I took such a running start at the very outset that I can’t slow down now.”

  “Maybe yes, maybe no,” Juffin said. “What difference does it make what the reason is?”

  “I don’t know. It’s just that when I manage to find some watertight explanation for something, it improves my appetite.”

  “Like you have no appetite at all otherwise,” Juffin said with a sniff. “You don’t sit down to a meal more than eight times a day, poor boy.”

  “Where do we start, Sir Juffin?” Melamori burst through the door of the office. “As far as I understand, he didn’t leave a trace behind. He went down the Dark Path, didn’t he?”

  “Yes. So this sinning trace, which doesn’t actually exist, is where you have to begin. Not too promising, is it? Undoubtedly, the least promising task you’ve faced since you began working here. Do you think you can follow him down the Dark Path? You should be able to handle it, I think.”

  Melamori frowned, then nodded. “I think I’ll manage. Following an ordinary trace down the Dark Path might be too much for me. But this one—it’s pulling me along! Unpleasant, but that’s just how it is.”

  Melamori’s voice sounded calm and unhurried, as though the boss had just offered her a mug of kamra.

  “You and I will go together,” Juffin said suddenly. “You follow the trace, and I’ll follow you. You never know what kinds of surprises we’ll find there. You stay here,Max. I’ll send you a call and let you know where we end up. Then you come to meet us, as quick as you can. Okay?”

  “You don’t have to ask. I’ll be there before the words are out of your mouth.”

  “Good. Let’s go, Melamori.”

  Melamori took her shoes off, went to stand on the threshold, and turned back to us in surprise.

  “Did he walk right out of the cell?”

  “Of course. When the door is open the cell becomes an ordinary room, just like any other, and you can cast as many spells there as you would in a regular kitchen.”

  “That’s right. Okay, let’s get on with it.” She waved at me, and smiled. “Don’t worry, Max. With Sir Juffin beside me, there’s nothing to fear.”

  “You have to learn to conquer a woman’s heart, lad.” Juffin laughed. “With me she’ll go to the ends of the earth.”

  “Will you teach me?”

  “I’ll teach you. If you behave.”

  Juffin touched the tip of his nose lightly with his forefinger. I felt like a true Kettarian when I answered him in kind.

  Melamori swept into the cell, stopped abruptly, stood up on tiptoe, sighed, and . . . disappeared.

  “Not too shabby!” Juffin said, letting out a low whistle. A second later, he, too, had disappeared. I looked at Kurush in bewilderment.

  “Everyone’s abandoned me!” I said plaintively.

  “That’s how people are,” the bird said.

  Max, can you i
magine? Melamori and I ended near the Old Thorn, just across the road. Juffin had given me no time to feel sorry for myself. Why don’t you drop by? We’re having fun over here.

  Fun? I replied, getting up from my chair. Did you decide to mosey over to the Thorn for a cup of soup? What a pair of slackers.

  Don’t curse, Max. Your expressions are sometimes too naughty. You’re already in the amobiler, I hope?

  No, I’m still in the office.

  You’re so sluggish today. All right, I won’t keep you. Over and out.

  A few minutes later I was already by the Old Thorn. I looked around and didn’t see anyone, so I sent a call to Juffin.

  Where are you?

  Max, you mean to say you’re already here? I planned to come out to meet you, but I didn’t expect you so soon. We’re in the little yellow house across from the Thorn, on the first floor. There are so many fresh traces here that Melamori is giddy with delight . . .

  I crawled out of the amobiler and threw open the door of the yellow house. My colleagues were lounging about in a spacious, empty room.

  “. . . that she won’t have to go following the trace of that dead bore Jiffa.” Juffin concluded his thought out loud.

  “That’s music to my ears,” Melamori murmured.

  “So now it’s my turn? You wanted me to ‘wipe out the bastard,’ right?” Much to my surprise, I felt the thrill of the hunt. My facial muscles tightened, and I smiled a predatory smile.

  “Max, you have the makings of a real Master of Pursuit,” Juffin said, grinning. Then he turned to Melamori. “Look at him! Whenever you’re straining at the leash to pursue another victim, it’s not a pretty sight, either.”

  “Really? That’s what I look like? Impossible,” Melamori said.

  “Okay, you go ahead and amuse yourselves,” I said. “I’m going to get down to business. Melamori, show me where the sinning trace is. Maybe I’ll be able to follow it like I did before.”