The Renegade Returns (Mill Town Millionaires)
Page 11
She turned to face Luke, almost afraid of what she’d see in his expression. “What?”
“You tried to explain to me last night why it would be hard for you if people assumed things.” He dipped his head for an instant, reminding her of a much younger Luke. His words were hesitant. “I wasn’t really in the mood to listen, but I did understand. Yet here I am, not twenty-four hours later, stepping all over that boundary once again. So… I’m sorry.”
Avery realized she stood on a precipice, looking over the edge into unknown territory. Darkness loomed, scary and uncertain. The landing would definitely hurt. But wouldn’t she kick herself one day if she held back now?
The past week had been a roller coaster of emotions. Making the most of their time together wasn’t as easy as it should be. Too many emotions were coming to the surface. Along with physical needs that she’d allowed to lie dormant for a long time—too long. Maybe she wasn’t built for casual, but she simply couldn’t walk away from this chance to be with Luke. However he wanted.
“No, Luke,” she said, then swallowed hard. “I’m sorry. I was only thinking about myself, and not how my actions would affect you.” She thought about Mark’s glare, and imagined the pitying looks she’d receive after Luke left. Somehow, she knew they wouldn’t carry the same weight after having Luke’s lips on hers.
“Let’s just play it by ear, okay?”
Luke’s brows shot up. “What? Avery Prescott without a plan or set of rules?”
“You keep it up and you’re gonna owe me another breakfast…” she warned. He just laughed. And deep inside, Avery knew she’d made the right choice.
If only her decision hadn’t been challenged quite so soon.
Just as they finished breakfast, a shadow dimmed their booth. Glancing up, Avery was horrified to see the deputy from the night before. Instinctively her body crowded into Luke’s, as if he could shield her from the embarrassment, even as she told herself there was nothing to be embarrassed over.
The deputy grinned. “Morning, folks,” he said.
Luke nodded, reaching out to shake hands. “Morning, Deputy Holloway. How are you?”
“Fine. Fine.” He shook his head slightly, adopting an expression of mock concern. “I’m just glad to see you folks made it out this morning…after your late night.”
A choking sound escaped Avery—one she wished she had held back. The burn had returned to her cheeks, but Luke just laughed once more.
The deputy winked at her. “Well, enjoy the rest of your day.”
As he walked away, he stopped here and there to talk to several people—including a few who frequented the diner every morning to share gossip. Avery could almost see the story of their midnight encounter spreading across the room in the whispers and grins. By the time Luke had paid and they rose to leave, it seemed like all eyes were on them.
As they made their way out, the whispering seemed to follow them in a wave, until one voice rang out. “Y’all behave now.”
Well, at least she wasn’t paranoid.
Luke gave a salute without stopping. Even the hostesses whispered as they approached the doors, only to stop abruptly as they walked by.
“Y’all have a good morning,” one said with a sly smile.
Luke just smiled back and continued to guide Avery out with the support of his hand at the small of her back. Nolen’s black car was just coming up the road.
“Well, I guess it’s official now,” Luke said.
She cut her gaze at him, confused. “What is?”
“Us.”
Her heart pounded. Maybe she wasn’t as ready as she’d thought. “I’m sure it will all die down.”
“I doubt it. I screwed up, so you have no choice but to date me now.”
Do you want me to? “How’s that?”
“You wouldn’t want to make me the laughingstock of Black Hills by rejecting me, would you?”
“That’s totally not how the story would go.” She’d be the laughingstock. Probably still would be after he left. Why couldn’t two adults just have some fun together without the small-town gossips automatically assuming forever after?
“Oh, Avery, you should know by now that I’m always right. That’s why you should just let me have my way.”
Even if his way was dangerous to her?
“Regardless,” he said, “you just did your good deed for the day.”
That stopped her in her tracks. “What?” Luke was talking in circles now.
“Just think how many existences you’re livening up with that story. You’re doing your civic duty to entertain others.”
“Only a man would look at it that way.”
“Honey, in a town this small, that’s the God’s honest truth.”
* * *
Almost a week later, Luke wished more than anything that he was back in that diner with Avery. Or anywhere with Avery.
As Nolen pulled the car into the parking lot of the local playground, Luke almost had a full-body cramp. The place was covered in people.
And not just locals. Luke only recognized about one in every four faces. Deep down, stage fright set in.
How the hell had this happened?
A year ago, seeing this crowd would have had his energy and excitement skyrocketing, but not today. All he could think about was the weakness in his legs, his cane…and that Avery wasn’t here with him. What if he fell? What if his legs buckled?
Locals actually knew Luke Blackstone, the person. They’d understand. These other people were here to see Luke Blackstone, racing celebrity. That was a whole different ball game, one he hadn’t faced since his crash.
He’d done one press conference after his release from the hospital. After that, he’d stuck to phone interviews and private meetings. He’d prefer the world see him whole rather than broken. Just another reason to push for his return. If he never had another case of nerves, he’d die a happy man. Which made him more sympathetic to what Avery had endured for years in order to date at all.
As he stepped from the car, Christina must have read his thoughts. “I’m so sorry, Luke,” she said as she rushed to his side.
“How’d this happen?” he mumbled, nodding in the direction of the crowd. “I thought this was supposed to be me with a few kids on the playground.” He caught a glimpse of something out of the corner of his eye. “Is that a news crew?”
His brother appeared behind his wife.
“What the hell, Aiden?” Luke struggled to control his breathing.
Christina’s big brown eyes filled with tears. “I’m so sorry, Luke.”
Aiden spoke over her shoulder. “One of the board of trustees members leaked it to the university newspaper, thinking it would be great press for the fund-raising efforts.” He shook his head. “It just spread from there.”
And Luke hadn’t heard a word. He’d stopped watching the news after his accident, afraid he’d catch a story about himself and risk seeing the footage from his crash. Even now, he could barely watch the sports stations. Though he forced himself to stay up-to-date on the racing circuit, it was hard. Harder than he’d like to admit.
Sucking in a deep breath, he forced himself into the professional persona he’d cultivated over the years. For once, the identity didn’t slip on as easily as before. Like an ill-fitting coat, it pushed and pulled against him, making him uncomfortable and unusually grouchy. If only Avery were here, he’d have just a touch of the calm she usually possessed. But she’d probably hate this kind of thing. She was more a one-on-one kind of girl.
“Well, this looks interesting…”
Luke glanced over his shoulder to see those blue eyes lifting shyly to meet his and he wanted to kiss her. But he wouldn’t, because despite what she might think, embarrassing her in front of large groups of people wasn’t his goal. I
nstead, he let his voice soften with welcome. “Hey.”
“Hey, yourself.” She glanced around and he could see the uncertainty as it clouded her fine features. “I thought you could use a little support. Maybe.”
“Definitely.”
Suddenly handling himself in front of this crowd didn’t seem quite so hard.
“Maybe you should work the crowd a little and give a short interview to the news crew first,” Avery suggested. “That will make it easier to move them back behind the barricades so y’all can shoot the commercial.”
“Avery, that’s a great idea. Thank you,” Christina breathed. Aiden patted his wife’s shoulder, then called a few men over to get things organized.
By the time Luke had shaken several hands and signed a bunch of autographs, he felt more in control. Avery was beside him at first, but it wasn’t long before the crowd edged her away. He kept her in his peripheral vision, but he didn’t really need to. It was as if his body could feel the distance between them.
Finally he stopped and found her with his gaze. Perhaps reading his thoughts, she pushed through until she once again breached the circle Aiden and several other men had formed around him to help with crowd control. After that, he kept her close, refusing to take more than a few steps without catching her hand.
How she felt about this, he wasn’t sure. Somehow, he didn’t care. In his selfishness, he simply knew he needed her. And in that moment, he vowed to break through the very boundaries he’d put in place. Tonight.
When he was being interviewed, she wasn’t far away. He let himself talk as if talking to her, and deep inside he relaxed. This feeling was dangerous, but he was too intoxicated with her presence to care. He’d worry later—when he had no other choice but to return to the life he’d built before her.
Though he was tired after, Luke realized how right Avery had been. Now that he’d made his rounds, the crowd willingly moved back behind the barricades so they could watch without interrupting. And Luke felt much more comfortable than he had when he’d arrived. If he felt a touch of trepidation as he looked over at the half dozen kids starring in the commercial with him, he sure as hell wasn’t gonna show it.
Avery walked over to the director and spoke quietly. After his nod, she came back and took his hand. “Follow me.”
It didn’t take him long to realize she was leading him over to the kids. He kept his persona firmly in place. “Hey, guys,” he said as they approached the group.
He got a few “hi”s back, a couple of giggles and some shy smiles. If he wasn’t mistaken, the kids were just as nervous as he was.
Then Avery spoke. “Kiddios, I want you to meet a friend of mine. This is Luke, as y’all know. Luke, this is Steven, Mariah…”
He tried to grab on to the names and not let them escape into thin air, but he’d simply met too many people today and his brain refused to cooperate. But he wouldn’t let that stop him.
Crouching down as best he could, he brought himself to the kids’ levels. They looked between five and ten or so—not that he knew a lot about telling kids’ ages. But they were cute. A set of twin girls with ringlet curls. A boy in a local softball club jersey. An older girl with a bright blue cast on her arm. Two other boys, one with crutches and another with a walker.
“Luke is a friend of mine,” Avery said. “And he’s nervous about being in front of the camera.”
Luke felt his feathers ruffle until she went on. “Y’all can help him out, right?”
As the kids started throwing out their best child-size advice, Luke realized she’d started a dialogue he could handle that was still kid-friendly, making it really easy for him to be involved. In that moment, something happened. Luke wasn’t sure what, but he knew he’d never find anyone like Avery, who helped him so selflessly, looking out only for his comfort and caring about whether he succeeded or not. Yes, they’d had some fun together, but it hadn’t been just him giving to her. It had been mutual.
How incredibly lucky was he to have that?
Without further thought, he grasped her hand and pulled her close. The feel of her body against his was even better than he remembered. He savored it.
Tilting his head down to hers, he murmured, “Thank you,” then took her lips in a solid kiss.
Not a brush. Not a quick peck. His lips met hers without hesitation. He soaked up the feel of her, the scent and taste of her, until his body went haywire. Only then did he pull back.
His gaze met hers. He was lost in the world between them, until a sound shattered the bubble.
He looked to the side to see the audience of kids and a few grinning moms. “Ooohhhh,” the kids cooed at them. Then all of them laughed. Luke couldn’t help but join in. To his relief, so did Avery.
This wasn’t just about sex. He wanted to do so much for Avery, big and little, just like she was doing for him. But he also wanted to take her to bed, and he had a feeling that experience would be completely different from the ones he’d had with other women.
Dangerous, but after all, he lived for the thrill.
He couldn’t help but reach out and brush his thumb over the round of her cheek as she smiled, softly stating his need, his purpose. Their gazes met once more, his conveying a promise.
Tonight, she would be his.
TEN
As the crowd once more pushed her to the edge, Avery gave up fighting the flow. Weariness muted her purpose. Luke was holding his own, and she didn’t want to feel like a groupie. Instead she turned in the opposite direction, finding an empty park bench to rest.
Only a few minutes passed before Christina sat down next to her. Avery could almost feel the questions before her friend asked them.
“That was some kiss,” Christina started.
Avery took a deep, deep breath as her chest threatened to constrict. “Yes, it was.” Part of her wanted to turn away, to not talk about this now…if ever. But avoiding it wasn’t an option. That look from Luke earlier told her everything was about to change. Her body softened, anticipating that look becoming action. Even while her heart beat in fear for the future.
“Are you gonna be okay, Avery?”
Avery appreciated that her friend wasn’t pushing for details. Christina spoke from concern, not from prurient curiosity.
“I’m not sure.” She searched for words. “Luke’s the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to me. Has always been, from the time I was a kid.”
Christina chuckled. “Yeah, the Blackstone brothers do have a tendency to be larger than life.”
“What if I can’t meet that?” Avery met her friend’s concerned gaze. “I’ve always felt a step behind when it comes to Luke. The only place I’m in control is as his therapist.”
“The woman I saw today wasn’t just a therapist.”
“I wanted to help.”
“Because you care about him?”
“I have since we were just kids. Every day I’m with him, it only gets worse.” Dang it. Avery swallowed hard, choking on the words that would reveal just how deeply she’d fallen. “One day he’s gonna leave. I’ll never be enough to keep him here…and everyone knows it.”
Christina’s cool hand enveloped hers, squeezing in sympathy. “Oh, honey, I know exactly how that feels. And I know that not everyone’s story is going to turn out like mine.”
They were quiet for long moments. With each second that ticked by, Avery’s heart grew more uncertain. She, more than anyone, knew how devastated Christina had been when she’d thought Aiden would return to New York for good. Could Avery go through that herself and have her spirit still survive? “I’m not sure I can live through losing someone else.”
“And you shouldn’t have to,” Christina said quietly. “But the alternative is never letting anyone close to you again. I think it’s a little late for that with Luke.”
>
Very true. Avery knew it, but acting on it, opening herself up beyond this point, was still scary. Could she live with the pain later? At least then she’d have the memories. Could she live with the emptiness of never having those memories at all?
Christina spoke again. “Do you really want to spend your time caring if everybody thinks you weren’t good enough for him later? Or would you rather focus on whether he thinks you’re good enough for him right now?” She squeezed Avery’s hand, flooding Avery’s senses with sympathy. “He’s a great guy. I promise he’s not just playing with you.”
Avery knew that. Though Luke was often playful, he was also genuine. She had a feeling his ambivalence up to this point had stemmed from the fact that he truly did see her as a friend. Hard as that was for her to believe.
For right now, he needed her. Wanted her. Could that be enough?
In the distance, he stood so tall, so proud. But she remembered that moment earlier when he’d needed her. Her chance to meet him more than halfway, without being model perfect or fast-lane ready. “I want him,” she murmured.
“Then take him,” Christina said, “and prove to him he can’t live without you.”
Avery doubted Luke would ever see her that way. Racing, he needed. Avery was just a bonus during the off-season. But she couldn’t live that way forever. And just like that, the lightbulb went on.
Hadn’t Luke been trying to teach her to live in the moment? Have fun right now, without worrying about what anyone else thought or said? And wasn’t she doing just the opposite by letting gossip and giggles and other people’s judgments make her decisions for her?
“Boy, am I slow.” She shook her head. “I can’t believe how afraid I’ve been all this time.”
“Been there, done that,” Christina agreed. “Do you want to continue that way?”
Hell, no. Avery was ready to live on her own terms. She’d known this for a while. Now she had to quit dragging her feet.
When Luke finally approached, she stood alone, more sure than she’d ever been. He met her with a tired smile.
Her nerves skittering around inside her, she drew in a deep breath. “I sent Nolen home.”