Love Delayed

by Love Belvin

  Alton sucked his teeth. “Man, Ty, get me some food. That shit smell good as hell and look it, too.”

  “You can ask nicer, boy,” Tynisha hissed as she walked to the cabinet for plates.

  I could see Stenton’s jaw tighten as he chewed. He was livid. We ate in silence while Tynisha filled their plates. I didn’t know how I would handle these two, but I knew that I would. I had to. I also knew that their animosity originated from Alton’s affair with my cousin, Angela, last summer.

  As I brooded, I felt Stenton’s big hand cup my right thigh. I looked to my right and saw him wink, I understood, offering me comfort. I wasn’t afraid, but I knew I wouldn’t be happy until this was addressed.

  Tynisha arrived at the island and sat with us. As soon as Alton’s plate arrived in front of him, he dug in. The moans he belted in satisfaction were bordering on sensual. Tynisha issued him a warning glare, to which he paid no attention as he feasted.

  “Yo, Zo, man, I knew you was smart, but I ain’t know you could lay it down in the kitchen like this until we was up in Alpine back in January. Remember that, StentRo? That chicken was the fuckin’ bomb, bro!”

  Tynisha’s neck snapped over to him. Stenton’s forehead wrinkled in disbelief of that reference, I’d guessed. I could honestly understand Tynisha’s thinking as a woman. Her man just brought up a fond memory with a woman that reminded her of a disgraceful era in her relationship. Anything associated with me would bring my cousin to mind. She didn’t like that, and I couldn’t blame her. Alton was such a tool. Maybe because of her pride, or simple better judgment, Tynisha didn’t respond to Alton’s stroll down memory lane. She went a different route.

  “What was up with all that moaning and screaming I heard up there last night?”

  My eyes shot over to Stenton, who glanced up from his plate and glared at Tynisha.

  I reached for the hot sauce as I quickly and audibly murmured, “Funny, I was going to ask what was up with the silence I heard from downstairs.” When I was planted on my seat I squared eyes with Tynisha’s. “After three kids the thrill is gone I see. Lost that elasticity, I guess.”

  Alton sputtered his orange juice and Stenton choked on his food.

  I had to play it cool. I knew how to deal effectively with bullies. I’d always been a target as a kid, between being the devout church girl and highest achiever in school.

  “Now, wait on here a minute, little girl!” Tynisha’s Jamaican accent was rearing.

  “No! You wait. I understand why you would be skeptical of me, but I am not my cousin.”

  “Thank god hoe-ism ain’t in the blood,” Alton mumbled.

  “And praise Jesus that teams aren’t chosen by dick sizes or else you wouldn’t wear the same uniform as your boy, StentRo here.” This time Tynisha snorted a laugh and Stenton went for my thigh underneath the table again. “Listen, I get it. I have to prove myself, especially after my cousin…and Alton’s indiscretions, but I’m no doormat. I will not be the butt of your jokes or your maid.” I peered pointedly over to Tynisha. “…or your pledgee to haze. If you think otherwise, there will be eventful crossings every time we meet.”

  I made sure to look them both in the eyes. I was prepared for war. I issued warning shots and now I had to be prepared to annihilate. My pulse raced, mouth had gone dry long before, and my palms were painfully gripping the edge of the island top. I was ready. All they had to do was bring it on.

  “Okay. Cool. She’s in,” Tynisha quickly shot over to Stenton before returning to her plate.

  “Yup! She good with me, bro. Pour me another glass of juice, Ty?” Alton swiftly announced his instant change of heart, too.

  I was completely mystified by the change in the atmosphere in just seconds. Was this a game to them? Or were they simply putting up guards they felt were needed for snakes trying to gain access to their hut? Whatever it was, Stenton still wore his scowl as he ate. I could tell he didn’t have a change of heart.

  A few hours later, Paul arrived with several shopping bags filled with clothes. Some fit and others, not so much. My size four frame was hard to call. I was so tiny in all places with the exception of my boobs. Stenton swore I had a butt, though no one had ever corroborated that claim. I was able to put together a few outfits to get me through the next few days.

  Tynisha and Alton left for home after the first morning. I learned that Alton and sometimes Tynisha, too, stayed in Philly at Stenton’s apartment. The reason was because after so many affairs, Tynisha made Alton sell his apartment and commute back and forth from Wells Fargo Center in Philly to Upper Saddle River, NJ as punishment. She eventually let up and allowed him to stay with Stenton to relieve him of the long drive. It really had to be exhausting trying to keep a grown man faithful.

  That afternoon, Stenton took me to meet his mother. It was a weird experience he didn’t actually prepare me for it. We drove up to West Milford to a fancy group home where she had an apartment-like facility. Stenton clearly treated her well. He introduced me as Niña to his mother who spoke English well, but was insistent on speaking Spanish to him. It was obvious to me that she wanted to exclude me from their exchange. What shocked me was Stenton’s ability to return her conversation fluently in the same language.

  Stenton hardly resembled his mother. She looked fairly healthy, though I could tell she led a hard life. I couldn’t understand why she lived in an assistant living facility. Other than the curly hair and the thick eyebrows he had in common with her, I could assume Stenton was his deceased dad’s twin. Call me saccharine, but my heart toiled at the vision of Stenton as a child with no stable parents.

  We didn’t stay long; their talk was brief, but what I could tell was this woman loved her son. She didn’t smile much and I didn’t need that for me to discern her affinity for him. It was the way she looked at him absorbedly and the tone used for her responses to him that told it all.

  On our way back to Philly, Stenton answered my unspoken question about his mother’s condition. He said someone had slipped her something back in the late ‘90s when she was at the height of her dope addiction. She’d been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. He said he didn’t know if the occurrences were related or mutually exclusive, but it had been a challenge caring for a mother who battled drug addiction and mental disorders concurrently. When he ended his sharing, I didn’t push for more. I had loads of questions including about his father who he’d shared a few months back was deceased. Other than saying his parents had a long history with drug abuse, he didn’t give much else. I rubbed his long muscular thigh as we coasted the turnpike in peace…and rock.

  The next two days went by in a blur. Stenton and I made love, cuddled, talked, ate and made out to our hearts’ delight. It amazed me how, when isolated, you got to know small facts about a person: how often they used the bathroom, small grunts they made unconsciously, the way their lips parted when they slept, the slant their eyes form when they’re giving their undivided attention to another one of your pointless stories, the expressions made as they succumb to orgasms, and their facial expressions when they’re simply contented. This was closeness at its best. It was discovery of intimacy. It was love.

  When it was time to leave, Stenton began to act strange. He was less talkative and developed abbreviated communications. It was hugely reminiscent of his taciturn behavior our last day together in Alpine. On our ride down to the parking garage I couldn’t help the need to address it.

  “You know,” I sang lightheartedly. “If this is the way you behave when it’s time to say goodbye, maybe I won’t visit you anymore.”

  I couldn’t hide my smile. Stenton made me giddy. We’d woken up, rolling all over the bed making love that I didn’t know could be so charged first thing in the morning. We even had a quickie after a long nap on his sofa. And from there, Stenton turned sourpuss.

  “That’s not even funny, Zo,” he growled, regarding me square in the eye.

  That tore at my patience.

  “Then what is it
when you walk around like a toddler whose Spiderman was stolen?” I grated before walking out of the elevator.

  “This way, Zo!” his tone was short.

  I specifically recalled making a left to the elevators, but it had been a long three days, so I didn’t argue. Well, not about where I had parked anyway.

  “You can be so arbitrary, you know that?” I continued to follow him while giving him a piece of my mind. “Just like when you didn’t let Alton give me alcohol in Alpine, but you let Tynisha give it to me here. Now you go into piss-boy mode with your snappy attitude.”

  “This is why,” he said a bit stiffly.

  “What is why? Why you let me drink the other day?”

  “No. This,” he tossed his tatted chin, “…is why I’ve been so fucking pensive.”

  It wasn’t until that moment that I realized we’d stopped walking. “Now you’re speaking in code, Stenton. What is why?”

  Stenton took me by the shoulders and physically turned my body to face a sleek black compact car. I was lost.

  “Any minute now, Stenton!” I had to get on the road.

  “Look at the fucking car, Zo.”

  That’s when I noticed the bow.

  “I won’t be here for your birthday tomorrow. I wanted to give you your gift before I leave.”

  “What is this, Stenton?” I whispered.

  “It’s a small 2008 BMW. Nothing too flashy, but definitely reliable.”

  “Stenton…a 2008? It’s 2007!” Then I shrieked, “My parents!”

  “…don’t have to know. And it’s nothing grand, just a baby Beamer. Very understated,” he spoke with a searing gaze. “Just don’t drive it home or to church. Take the clunker.”

  I started looking around. “Where is old Bessie anyway?”

  “At school. I had Paul drive her the night you arrived.”

  “How? When—” I stopped when I recalled him taking my purse. “That’s how you were able to know the type of tampons I wear,” I murmured as I pinched the bridge of my nose, overcome with mortification again.

  “You’re taking the car, Zo,” his tone was adamant.

  “Okay! Okay!” I gasped. “I see once again I don’t have a say in your grand schemes.”

  Instead of continuing to fight, Stenton exhaled. There was a long pause. We both needed a moment to cool our hooves.

  “I knew you’d trip about your parents so it’s all in my name, and that can be changed the moment you’re ready. The paperwork is in the glove compartment along with a signed affidavit that you’re an authorized user of the vehicle. Here.” He handed me the keys from his pocket.

  Even the fob was elegant. Holy mother of Joseph! I have a BMW! I couldn’t fathom it all. Similar to the laptop, I couldn’t muster the proper response.

  I reached up and threw my arms around his broad shoulders. “Thanks, Stent, for thinking about my safety.” His hands splayed on my back. While still clasped I murmured, “You’re starting to make things weird for us. I’m starting to feel kept like a girlfriend or something, buddy.” I pulled back, extended up on my toes, and patted his head like a kid.

  “Shit,” he scoffed. “Heaven forbid I try holding you to an antiquated societal title like that,” he whispered so low that I almost didn’t catch it.

  A small grin cracked my bewildered face. Then a revelation dropped in my head.

  “Hey, is my birthday the reason why you okayed Tynisha giving me a drink a couple of days ago? You were ready to bruise poor Alton.”

  He shook his head. “You’re now a day away from your 21st birthday. I didn’t want to be responsible for your under aged drinking back then.”

  “Ummmm…news flash,” I sang from the corner of my mouth, my smile one-sided. “I was still under aged when I arrived here. You’re responsible!” I jeered.

  Stenton’s face didn’t break a smile. He was back to being a sourpuss.

  “Okay! Really, dude, what’s your deal?”

  His eyes rolled behind me in the distance and his chin slightly tooted, fortifying himself. “I don’t want you to l-leave.” He exhaled harshly. “I’m not ready to split. I think about you all the damn time and when I’m with you all the other bullshit seems to ebb away.” Another deep sigh. “Zo, I haven’t seen my mother in almost a year. It’s not easy watching her kill herself with those fucking drugs, but bringing you with me made it…feel tolerable.” His eyes turned pleading. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing with you.” He ducked his head. “I’ve never been with a woman so young in comparison to my age, but I feel like I’m fucking addicted to you. I know you have your ducks all neatly aligned and I don’t want to interrupt that—” Stenton squeezed his eyes closed. This was hard for him. When they opened he regarded me severely this time. “I don’t know how the season’s going to end. Just promise me you’ll make time to go away with me once it’s over. I don’t care what you have to tell your parents, just promise me at least a week, okay?”

  His pain stricken face tore at my soul. I reached up and kissed him hard and thoroughly. It took him no time to join me. I wanted to cure his angst. To blanket him with the security he obviously wasn’t provided in life. I loved him that much. I pulled back first and gave a solemn nod.

  “I’ll be ready for you,” I whispered breathlessly.

  The ride back to Jersey was filled with so many questions, the biggest being what were Stenton and I doing together. I had no idea. I’d only known that I had never felt the exhilaration that I did with him. He was full of surprises…and confused the heck out of me with his mood swings, like that night I left him.

  The next morning, I was awakened by a call from the lobby letting me know I had a delivery. Stenton had a half a dozen floral arrangements delivered to campus. I couldn’t fit them all in my room so I ended up giving out half of the ginormous bouquets to friends. I followed his updates on Facebook where Stenton would often post things related to our conversations.

  He’d call and text regularly, never skipping a day and always keeping up with the happenings of my classes. He was amazing, even when being annoying.

  Stenton: What are you up to?

  Me: At a pastor’s anniversary banquet with my mom.

  Stenton: Stiff?

  Me: Completely.

  Stenton: Send me a pic.

  I put the phone as low as I could near the table, issued a kissy face, and clicked.

  Me: Cheese

  Stenton: Damn Zo you got your tits out?!?!

  Me: LMBO! My mom hates it. Good thing my dad didn’t come.

  Stenton: Fuck! You’re about to make ME come!

  Me: Perv.

  I waited a few seconds as I chewed on my nails.

  Me: What are you doing? Send me a pic…

  Stenton: I’m about to head outside to play.

  A picture came through and my mouth dropped. Stenton was decked out in a black cowl neck sweater that framed his chiseled chest intriguingly. He rolled his sleeves displaying the heavy ink of his forearms, making the look every bit cosmopolitan. He paired it with what appeared to be casual hunter green riding pants. What topped it off was the black fedora atop his head and gold wire framed sunglasses that hid his eyes. Stenton looked good enough to eat.

  And those heart shaped lips…

  I figured he decided to put away his rocker boy style for tonight. I just hoped it wasn’t for someone of the female persuasion. I felt that unfamiliar pang of jealousy excreting into my bloodstream. Sex does that to people. Or at least it did to me in that moment.

  Me: Be sure to play in the middle of the turnpike.

  Stenton: LMMFAO & SMH. Lata Nina.

  Jealousy felt crappy.

  ~~~~~~~~~~

  July 2007 Stenton

  “You okay, Zo?”

  Zoey’s head popped over to face me. Her eyes were big and mouth open, evidently caught off guard by the sudden sound of my voice.

  “Yeah, I’m okay. I see you’re finally up.” She cracked a small smile.

  “Yup,�
� I croaked as I stretched my arms and legs, yawning hard and big, tired as fuck.

  “Did you sleep through landing?” she asked, still smirking. “I can’t believe you were out from the time we took off until now. Somebody’s too tired to vacation.”

  Not too tired for what I have in mind for you, though.

  When I learned that we’d be going to the finals, I had Paul book a getaway. My last game was last night. As soon as I got off the court, finished my interviews, took the usual pictures, chatted with coaches and teammates, and showered, I headed home to do last minute packing. Excitement wouldn’t allow my labored body to sleep. I twisted and turned with heavy anticipation of the next day.

  Before the sun rose the following morning, we headed straight to Princeton to pick up Zoey and then shot up to Teterboro airport. I was drained—physically and emotionally—from this season. I put my all in, pushed myself, and now I needed respite. I used being alone and away with Zoey for a week as my carrot-at-the-end-of-the-stick to perform optimally. And I did. So, I got to hide away and restore in the Cayman Islands…with her.

  When Zoey stepped on the plane, I noticed she was a little off. Likely because of the private jet that I chartered. I’d taken several women on their first chartered plane experience and had gotten several reactions; some outwardly excited, some indifferent—those were the groupies who only fucked with dudes with money—and this time with Zoey, it was different. She tried hard to not come across too thrilled, but did admit to never being on a private aircraft. Another new experience for my Niña. This was going to be a great vacation. That, I was sure of.

  “You ready, chief?” Rob asked as he and Barry shuffled from their seats behind Zoey and me to get to the main door of the cabin.

  As I studied Zoey, I answered, “For sure.” She still looked a little askew.

  I knew taking this young girl out of the country was crazy, but it was what I wanted. I paid minimal attention to my curiosity as to what tale she gave her family about being away this week, but decided to watch her closely to be sure she didn’t freak out. Zoey was adventurous, but still grew up in a bubble and wasn’t exposed to the shit I lived. Like now, she was eyeing Rob and Barry as though she’d never seen them before.