SCHIZOMEGA: Zombies Made in the U.S.A. (Ian McDermott Paranormal Investigator series Book 3)

by David Aslin

  This time E held up his hand in the form of a closed fist, directly at Ian’s face. Clearly indicating for Ian to continue no further on the topic.

  “As I told you before, the name’s E just, E! Long ago they gave me a letter and took away my name. And Ian, in case you’re wondering, I no longer possess a license to kill. But mind you, now I don’t need one!”

  Ian rocked back in his chair. He was starting to get very nervous regarding where this all might be going. But as always, Ian’s insatiable curiosity drove him full speed ahead.

  “Okay, so you work, so now you work for which government, ours or the British?”

  E starkly interjected, “Neither, I work for the council.” Ian silently mused, Clayton told me a little about the Council of Twelve. The ruling body of the vampire community.

  E more calmly continued, “I believe Clayton has made you privy to the counsel? And he tells me you know more than most humans about a number of things.”

  Ian smiled slightly, an involuntary nervous reaction as he responded, “Yes, I know something, a little. Clayton told me some things back in Long Beach. Some I believe due to seeing is believing. Others, I’ve learned to take somewhat on faith, considering what I’ve experienced over the last, well, let’s just say these last months have been a real eye-opener, to say the least!”

  E smiled slightly, “Yes. Well, according to what Clayton tells me, few humans have ever learned, at least until before it was too late, even a portion of what you know. Clayton says with what he’s told you, along with information that you’ve gathered, or rather experienced on your own, that you probably know more than any living human that is, about our world, Mr. Cryptozoologist turned Paranormal Investigator. Things the council typically unanimously agree that humans are better off not knowing. However, you have a rather convincing senior councilmen on your side, so to speak. Whose influence has allowed you to live with the knowledge that no other human possess regarding our existence, beyond the ridiculous interpretations to be found in books and movies. Well, you and to a lesser extent, Sheriff Charlie Redtail. Yes Ian… I, like the council, know all about Charlie. There’s precious little the council doesn’t know about.”

  Ian slowly picked up his fresh glass of Jack -and-Coke. He then took a large pull from his drink. Ian hoped that E didn’t notice the slight trembling in his hand as he returned his now half empty glass to the table. “So, you’re a vampire?” Ian said with the intonation of a question.

  Without hesitation E replied, “More precisely, I’m both human and vampire. A hybrid if you will. The result of, or rather one result of someone who’s been twice bitten. I assume by what Clayton’s told me, he told you at least a little about the power of three?” Ian reflected back on what Clayton had told him about the, unholy power of three, the main governing forces, or physics, that ruled the vampire world. Ian thought it to be much like Newton’s Law of Gravity which lays at the core of defining the physical laws of the world as humans understand it.

  CHAPTER 6

  ODESSA NOW

  A man sits alone in a dimly lit office. The phone rings. The man snuffs-out his half smoked cigarette into an abalone shell, ashtray. He glances at the clock on his wall, the incoming call had now rang four times. After checking the caller I.D., he clears this throat then reluctantly answers the phone.

  “Yes. This is Schwartzcoff. Yeah, I have what you want, but this is the last time. And it’s going to cost you double what you paid before. Yeah, that’s right double! Christ, the risks I’ve taken for you people. I’m going to need to get out of the country, soon. It’s not going to take long before the bugs are discovered missing. Yes, I have viable specimens of both EVD and Lyssavirus. I take it that your Haitian source will be supplying you your other needs, the TTX and Datura. Yes, well LSD and PCP… your cohorts can easily supply all of it you will need. Just make certain the drugs aren’t cut with too much shit. If they are good, along with what I’ve got for you, it should work, theoretically. I’ll have the materials to you later this evening. Oh, and never call me on this line again. In fact, never call me again, period. I’ll contact you regarding the trade, when and where. It’s going to be in a very visible, public place, of that I can assure you. Oh, and you make certain that you come through with the passport and travel visa that we agreed on. That’s right, Argentina. Yes, the same as last time. Deposit the funds in my account with, Banco de la Ciudad - Buenos Aires. You’ve got all the wire and transfer codes. I’ll be keeping an eye on that account, and if the twenty million isn’t deposited into that account within twenty four hours, well … that’s right! And be damn sure that my new identity will pass mustard with customs. Now listen to me very closely; if you screw with me in any way, like I suddenly develop any nasty case of death. Or, I get struck by a random act of God. I mean if anything doesn’t go right, or if anything happens to me, anything at all. I’ve left five letters. One with my attorney and four other copies were given to, undisclosed to me, third party. Who then randomly picked out of a hat so to speak, without having any knowledge of the firms’ names; that person picked four associated law firms. Anyway, those letters were sent to them sealed within a container marked not to be opened under any circumstances without prior instruction to do so. Those little packages, containing the letters have been put into each of the firms vaults. The packages contents, the letters containing explicit instructions to be simultaneously delivered to the cops, the Feds, CNN, and this is the best part, to a couple of your, shall I say, less than friendly competitors. All to be delivered by way of armored car, bonded courier service upon notification of my death or disappearance. Yes, it did cost me a small fortune to go to such lengths. Oh, I disagree, knowing you and your people I believe all of my precautions were, very necessary. Don’t forget for a second that those letters detail your entire operation, naming you specifically. As well as they spell out in detail addresses, names, and aliases of all of the principals involved in your nefarious operations. Now, with all that said all you need to do is play it straight with me, and you don’t have a thing to worry about. Everybody wins. Those letters will remain sealed, out of sight from the world forever. That is unless I don’t live to be a ripe old, unless I don’t live to be a very rich very old man!”

  CHAPTER 7

  MORE - FRONT DOOR

  “Ian, I realize that you haven’t had much time to do much snooping around, but what if anything have you turned up? Have you come up with anything enlightening regarding your prior to our meeting, quest for facts versus fiction as it pertains to voodoo magic and undead nasties?” E said, while gazing and flashing a come hither smile and nod, at a young thirty something women who was seated at a table with her apparent male friend, directly adjacent to theirs. The women suddenly arose from her table and passed by very close to E as she stealthily dropped a small folded piece of paper onto their table directly, in front of E. Without hesitation she continued on past them, heading in the direction of the ladies room. Ian somewhat slack-jawed watched E pick-up the small folded piece of paper, unfurl and rapidly scan its apparent message.

  E began to grin slightly as he spoke. “Ian, flag down our cocktail waitress and order us another round. I’ll pay her when I return. I shouldn’t be more than ten, fifteen minutes.”

  Ian couldn’t help himself but to comment. “You mean you’re going to meet up with that women who dropped the note. Hopefully her friend over there won’t come looking for her. I mean, of course for his sake!”

  E smiled as he replied, “Let’s just keep it at I have a contact, that I must make contact, with.”

  Ian did as instructed, he waved down a cocktail waitress, and she was a different young women than their last one, who Ian was told was on break. Ian ordered another round of the same drinks as they’d had before, a Jack-n-Coke for himself and a vodka martini for E. The waitress turned to leave as Ian suddenly remembered. “Oh, and Miss… the martini, please tell the bartender to make that, shaken, not stirred. And hold the olive, no junk!” I
an was himself attempting to be as debonair as what seemed to come natural for E, as he flashed the waitress a flirtatious smile, which to Ian’s gratification appeared to work, due to her returned, smile and wink. Ian chuckled slightly as he mused, The Big Easy. A guy could get used to this town. But, I’ll bet she doesn’t come back tossing her digits at me.

  Suddenly Ian started to feel a little bit guilty at even thinking about the cocktail waitress the way he did. But he then began thinking to himself, It’s not like Zoey and I have any kind of commitment to each other. Hell, who am I kidding, a young beautiful woman like Zoey isn’t going to be wanting the likes of me for more than a minute, and that minutes no-doubt up.

  About twenty minutes had passed. Ian had long since received the order of drinks and was nearly finished with his. Ian was beginning to consider just leaving when he spotted E heading from the direction of the ladies room towards their table. E paused for a moment as it appeared from Ian’s perspective that he was now talking to two ladies seated at a table nearly across the room. But that didn’t detain E long, within seconds he’d returned to Ian at their table.

  The guy seated next to them, whose lady friend had left him twenty minutes earlier; had been walking around the place for nearly the last ten minutes. It was only in the last couple of minutes that he’d returned to his seat. His date finally made her way back to their table rejoining with him. He looked at her then glared for a moment towards E. E smiled and returned a half parade wave to the man. Ian could only surmise that, due to the abundant lack of size by comparison to E; the man quickly decided that a physical confrontation would not bode well for him; so the man just turned his head from E and glared at the women now once again seated across from him. Without uttering a word he just scowled then threw his hands up in the air, as he abruptly arose from his chair, and turned with a jerk, as he rapidly began to leave, intent on distancing himself and the beautiful trouble that he’d arrived with and, E. The lady got up to head after her departing date, but paused for a second. Looking directly at E she shouted above the noise of the room and loud music from the band, “Call me!”

  Without missing a beat, E looked from the departing woman directly back at Ian as he said very calmly, “Now, where were we? Oh yes, I’d just asked you, sort of, if you’ve any leads that you feel would be worth pursuing as we gather some intelligence regarding all that we may be soon dealing with. That is, if you’re in. And by in, I mean that if you indeed are in, I won’t have to kill you!” E grinned then laughed, slightly. “More than likely something else will, but not me. If you’re in not only do you have Clayton’s protection, but by proxy, shall we say, you have mine as well. So, what shall it be, in or very out?”

  Ian wasn’t certain if he’d just been messed with, or had in fact been threatened. Even with his considerable powers of perception and deductive reasoning, E remained, largely an enigma to him, a mystery man. But from what he could surmise he was being given little if any choice on the matter, so without further deliberation, Ian answered, “Yeah, okay, I’m in. I mean I’ll help anyway I can. I don’t know if this means anything, or could amount to anything. But I spoke just for a moment with a gal from one of those voodoo, witchcraft shops just up the way from here. She seemed, well, it seemed like she knew, I don’t know. She said we’d be seeing each other again soon, and well…”

  E interrupted, “Was the woman an albino?”

  Ian somewhat surprised answered, “Yes, yeah, she’s albino, but how’d you know?”

  E paused for a moment, picked up his previously untouched drink, and like the two before it, drank it down in one long swallow, then looking at his drink he blurted out. “Good… good on you, Ian. No junk.” Ian noticed that E’s accent tended to fade in and out; as did his Scottish colloquial vernacular. E sat back in his chair as he replied, “That was easy enough to guess. You intimated that the shop you visited today was just up the way from here. That albino’s shop was a good bet. From what I’m told, she might be the real deal. A genuine voodoo priestess. One that, much like our mutual friend, Clayton Collins hides in plain sight by running her little tourist trap of a magic shop. Well, a witch has to eat to. There probably isn’t much money in selling chicken blood and dancing with snakes door to door. Anyway, you should pay her another visit when we’re done here. Don’t be too direct with your questions. Start by saying you’re doing well, just what you came to New Orleans for. Tell her you’re investigating voodoo and zombieism facts and myth. That probably will get you either laughed out of her shop, or, thrown out on your arse. But, who knows?”

  Ian thought to himself, I had no plan on ever setting foot in that place again. Ironic, with me going back in there will fulfill her prediction. The question is it by chance, or, something else?

  E continued, “Ian, we’ll go our separate ways but only for an hour or two. I’ve got some things I need to pick up, then I’ll meet you back at your hotel room.”

  Ian scratched his head, then took a deep breath before replying, “Do you plan on getting a room at the hotel? My understanding is that they have no more vacant rooms.”

  E grinned, “I’ll be staying with you and that dog of yours.”

  Ian frowned, “You don’t understand, I’ve only the one bed and…”

  E interrupted Ian. “Relax there sport, I don’t require a bed. I never sleep. Clayton has hired me to keep you out of trouble and that’s what I’m going to do. Well, maybe by first getting you into some but…” E laughed before continuing, “By the way, Ian, about your dog…”

  Ian rapid-fired, “What about my dog? What about, Scout?”

  E suddenly became somber, “Your dog, he’s been bitten hasn’t he? I’d guess within the last say, three weeks?”

  Ian scooted his chair back as he replied, “What do you mean? Well, it’s true he was hurt around then, but he has healed up and now he’s just, fine.”

  E continued, “Don’t play coy with me boy. Your dog was more than just injured, he was bitten, and bitten by, Salizzar, wasn’t he?”

  Ian paused in reflection, “I don’t… I mean, I’m not sure, I don’t know. We cleaned him up afterwards … but there was so much blood, and he had multiple gashes and wounds. I couldn’t tell if they were from any bite. I was going to take him to a veterinarian, but Scout’s a powerful dog as I’m sure you noticed. By the next morning he was already doing much better. And, well, over the next couple days, well, he just healed very quickly. Why? Where ‘re you going with this?” Ian said very sternly, not caring that he was totally convinced that the man before him was in every way a lethal weapon.

  E then scooted his chair back. Suddenly his voice became softer, gentler than Ian had so far heard the mystery man speak with. “Ian, your dog is exhibiting behavior that is associated with being bitten by a vampire.” Ian’s eyes rolled as he took a deep breath. E continued before Ian could say anything. “Now, understand that vampire venom affects animals differently than it does humans. The infection for lack of a better word, spreads at least somewhat predictably in humans. Primarily because, I suppose that most if not all vampires at least for many centuries began as humans. So the DNA, of vampires and humans share biological commonalities, not to put too fine a point on it. Not so with animals, that are in no way humanoid. Not even apes can be transformed into a true vampire of its species. A vampire’s DNA I’m told resembles a splicing of human, and the demonic, similar to the vampire bat, and wolf. Similar but different. Nephilim-ic, if you like your bible stories.” E paused and rubbed at his chin before continuing, “But just maybe since dogs are so closely related to wolves, especially German Shepherds, it’s not likely, but I’m no expert regarding these things, maybe he might have a slim chance.”

  Ian was now becoming very alarmed, angry, and extremely agitated. “What the hell do you mean, Scout might have a slim chance? You’re not implying that…”

  E held up his right hand to try and calm Ian down before he drew too much attention to them from any of the surrounding bar
crowd. “Look Ian, vampire venom typically corrupts the blood at the cellular level, causing it and the afflicted to mutate on various levels depending on the number of times bitten. But with an animal that is bitten by a humanoid vampire and lives. Typically within a few weeks, generally the venom begins corrupting then eventually destroying their blood cells. Causing well, they first go totally wild before death. This is a law of nature I suppose. Or, God’s law if you like your Bible stories. Anyway, it is what keeps vampires from infecting every animal on Earth, and turning all animal life into vampiric creatures.”

  Ian interjected, “Something like why you can breed a horse and a donkey and create a mule. But two mules can’t procreate. It’s a natural genetic law of separation.” Ian took a gasp of air and continued. “So, the vampire venom indiscriminately kills all animals other than humans rather than mutate them.”

  E nodded his head slowly in agreement. Then interjected, “But like I said, there is a chance. You know better than I, that canines all have a genetic commonality with wolves. And again like I said before, I suspect German Sheppard’s are one of the closest breeds not far removed from their evolutionary brother the wolf.”

  Ian being a former Zoologist knew there was truth to E’s assumption as he spoke, but barely loud enough to be heard. More thinking out loud than actively trying to communicate, “Yes. The gray wolf, Canis lupus, is genetically extremely close to the larger breeds of dogs, Canis lupus familiaris. They can easily be mated to create wolf-dog hybrids, especially with breeds like Huskies, German Sheppard’s, Akita’s and the like. So maybe, Oh Scout, what have I done to you?” Ian suddenly became teary eyed as he spoke. “Okay, I understand that there isn’t much if anything that can be done for Scout. He’s either going to pull through this or, well it’s not like a vet can help him now. I’ll go and see that Albino voodoo whatever, witch. But then I’m going straight back to the hotel to be with my, to be with Scout. And I’m gonna call Clayton. If anyone knows what to do, he will.” E smiled and nodded in agreement.