The Vengeance of Snails

by Chrys Cymri

  ‘Not bad. Roast chicken. Not free range, though.’

  I took a seat in the padded armchair near the sink. ‘I’m going to see Doctor Jones in a bit. Has he said when you can leave?’

  ‘Soon.’ James was once again looking out of his window. ‘I guess. He said I’m about ready.’

  ‘Your room’s all ready for you.’ I waited for a moment, then added, ‘And we’ve had an exciting development today. Taryn’s laid her eggs. Five new gryphons have come into the world. You’ll be home in time for the hatching.’

  ‘Right.’

  I spent another twenty minutes filling the space between us with words which never quite reached James. From time to time he grunted or made a monosyllabic response. Finally I made my goodbyes and left.

  Dr Caldyr Jones’ office was further along the same ward. The door was open, and he looked up from his computer screen to wave me in. ‘Penny. Wonderful. I was just looking up your brother’s notes. Would you like a cup of tea? Coffee?’

  ‘I’m okay, thanks, Dr Jones.’ I took a seat. ‘I’ve just come from visiting James.’

  ‘Caldyr, please. Any change?’ At my shake of the head, Caldyr sighed. ‘It’s part of the healing process, Penny. People who’ve had heart attacks usually go through a period of anxiety and depression. And James is only twenty-three.’

  ‘It was self-induced,’ I reminded Caldyr. ‘He decided to swallow that cocktail of drugs. He knew it would stop his heart.’

  ‘But he also expected to be fully healed by an injection of unicorn horn, didn’t he?’

  ‘And I don’t know why that didn’t happen,’ I continued. It was a relief to be dealing with someone who knew all about Daear so I could be honest and open. ‘Peter even brought the horn here for James to hold. Why is his heart still damaged?’

  ‘We’ve sometimes had limited quantity of horn to use on patients.’ Caldyr held up a hand. ‘I’m not asking you to bring over the one you own. The fewer people who know what unicorn horn can do, the better. We’re already losing our rhinos, in this world, because people believe that their horns can cure cancer. We don’t want unicorns to become a target.’

  ‘I agree. Although unicorns are very capable of defending themselves.’ I leaned back in my chair. ‘Did you experiment with the horn you had?’

  ‘To a limited extent.’ Caldyr typed away at his keyboard. ‘We found that the longer we had our sample, the less effective it became. Looks like the horn draws power from being attached to a unicorn. When it’s been removed, the healing ability drops away.’

  ‘So that’s where James went wrong. He had no idea that the horn couldn’t totally reverse what he’d done to himself.’ I rubbed my face. ‘I should’ve taken him to a living unicorn. Everything happened so fast that I just didn’t think. Should I try now?’

  ‘Too late.’ Caldyr looked up again, and his expression softened. ‘There seem to be limits to their powers. Horn works best on fresh wounds. But limbs don’t grow back, for example. Scars don’t disappear. And we’re talking about scarred heart tissue.’

  ‘So he’ll just have to recover the old fashioned way.’

  Caldyr gave me a smile. ‘With the most up to date medical knowledge. We’ll have a plan worked out for him, and we’ll arrange support for him along the way. That’ll include counsellors, if he’s willing to talk to one? Or is there someone closer to home?’

  ‘Rosie,’ I said slowly. ‘She’s the assistant priest in my parish. I know James has seen her a couple of times.’

  ‘Good. We’ll discharge him tomorrow afternoon, if that works for you?’

  ‘Certainly.’ We both rose to our feet, and shook hands. ‘Many thanks for all this, Caldyr.’

  ‘Anyone who deals with Lloegyr needs special support,’ Caldyr said firmly. ‘It can be a dangerous place. As you well know.’

  ‘As I well know. Pity James wouldn’t listen to me.’

  ‘To be fair to him, he didn’t expect a gryphon clan to pick him out for a hunt.’ He handed me a business card. ‘Here’s my mobile number. Let me know if there’s anything more I can do.’

  When I left the building, I turned my iPhone back on. Someone had left a message during my visit. I sat in the car and listened to Bishop Nigel’s cultured voice ask if he could drop by the vicarage on Friday. My response was short, sharp, rude, and fortunately heard by the car alone. The email response I sent to his chaplain was a polite lie, and as I drove home I resigned myself to the visit. I’d already been fired from my position in Caer-grawnt. What more could my bishop do to me?

  Chapter Two

  Between Wednesday and Friday falls Thursday, otherwise known as my day off. Because my congregation at St Wulfram’s were still coming to terms with my unexpected early return from sabbatical, I was actually free all day.

  Peter collected me at 10am and we headed up to the church. I noticed, to my regret, that most of the filming had ended for the webisodes based on my blog. Only one cameraman was wandering through the churchyard, and he seemed intent on capturing video of the building itself. We waited until the man was on the south side of the church, and then I unlocked the north door.

  A squeak of bats greeted our entrance. ‘It’s all right,’ I called up to them. ‘I’m not here to check up on you.’

  ‘You’re sure it’s a vampire colony?’ Peter asked me quietly.

  I lifted my gaze to the small black bodies fluttering across the chancel. ‘Yes. They have that haze that I also see around, well, were-foxes, for example.’

  Peter strode around the church, nodding at the dark pews, the stained-glass window showing the return of the prodigal son, and I saw him smile at the plastic covered altar. Then he came back to my side. ‘I’m happy to have our wedding here. But isn’t it a bit close to home? You wouldn’t want Nenehampton Cathedral or something?’

  ‘This is my church.’ I winced. ‘Love it or loathe it, this is where I belong.’

  ‘You’ll have Holly here.’

  ‘My churchwarden would track me down wherever we went.’ I took a deep breath. ‘No, this is the place. How would you feel about Rosie taking the service?’

  ‘Fantastic.’ His eyes narrowed. ‘As long as Linda can come as well.’

  ‘Of course she can,’ I assured him. ‘Anyway, the news broke while we were in Lloegyr. People know that Rosie’s partner is a woman. On the whole, everyone seems very supportive. But then, they’ve always liked Rosie. It’s me they’re not so sure about.’

  ‘They’ll enjoy clucking over you. Everyone loves a bride.’

  ‘We’ll see if that holds true.’ I pulled out my iPhone. ‘Fortunately, I’m on good terms with the vicar here. And she says that the church is free on our preferred date. If you’re happy to wait until August?’

  ‘I like the idea of marrying on the anniversary of our first date.’ He grinned. ‘Ready for tomorrow’s visit to the prospective in-laws?’

  ‘I guess so.’

  Peter touched my arm. ‘Don’t worry. They’re going to be thrilled to hear that we’re engaged. They’re already very fond of you.’

  We left the chilly building behind, and I was careful to lock up. ‘That’s the easy bit. Now for reception venues.’

  The sun had come out, casting warm light over fields and hills as Peter navigated our way through the Northamptonshire countryside. Meadowell Farm was up a long drive, and I found myself smiling as we neared the sandstone buildings.

  Sarah, the wedding coordinator, showed us around the permanent marquee and the nearby barn conversion. The price for hire and full catering made me take a sharp breath, as it was half of my annual stipend. But Peter gave me a reassuring nod. ‘We can afford it,’ he said as we walked through the landscaped grounds. ‘I’ve put quite a bit away in savings, and I think my parents will want to chip in as well. If this is what you want, we’ll book it.’

  ‘I love the views.’ We’d stopped at the other side of the barn. Fields of green and yellow stretched between hedgerows. Several horses graz
ed nearby, and I heard sheep in the distance. ‘And it’s a family business. I like the idea of supporting a family business.’

  ‘Then it’s decided?’ At my nod, he gave me a quick kiss. ‘Then let’s book them up. And I should think we’ll be able to negotiate a bit of a discount, since we’re getting married on a Thursday.’

  Peter’s iPhone buzzed just as we were signing the contracts and he was declining a glass of Prosecco. I sipped at mine as he stepped out to take the call. When he came back, the look on his face made me hurry through the rest of the drink. ‘Sorry, Penny, I need to go to the station. The snail sharks we caught yesterday are ready to be taken back to Lloegyr, but the duty sergeant is being difficult. Revenge for my early return from Caer-grawnt, I think.’

  ‘This is a turnaround,’ I commented as I put down the empty glass. ‘It’s usually me who has work interrupt a day off.’

  ‘At least it means you understand.’

  We agreed a date to return and sample the menu and wine choices, then returned to Peter’s Volvo. ‘Will you be back in time to help me collect James?’ I asked as we headed back to Northampton.

  ‘I think you’d better not count on it.’ Peter gave me an apologetic grimace. ‘I’ve got some buttering up to do. I might have to go with them to the thin place.’

  I swallowed my disappointment. ‘What happens on the other side?’

  ‘Heddlu collect the crates. The Lloegyr police take them to a release point, far away from any crossing we know of.’

  ‘And do any of them make it back to England?’

  ‘We don’t know. Not since I stopped painting numbers on their shells.’

  For the rest of the journey, we talked about our hopes for the new Doctor Who companion. Peter pulled up by the vicarage drive and I hopped out. Then he was driving away, and I glanced at my wristwatch. 4pm. I was due to collect James in ninety minutes, so I had to get moving.

  All was quiet in the house. I checked over my brother’s room one last time, straightening the large ‘Get Well Soon’ card and patting down the fresh duvet cover. A glance into the gryphons’ bedroom revealed that both parents were asleep, each covering half of the nest. In my own room, I made the unwelcome discovery that Clyde had made himself comfortable on my bed, and was watching Teletubbies on the TV. ‘Just don’t start thinking that you can sleep here,’ I warned him as I changed from my nice suit to cargo trousers and fleece. ‘I already have someone lined up to share my bed, and it isn’t you.’

  Then my words broke over my head, and I had to lean against the wall for a moment. Alan had been the only person to ever sleep with me. The bright duvet cover blurred in my eyes. I had finally said my goodbyes to my dead husband, but I now knew there was something else I had to do. Before I married Peter, I would have to buy a new bed.

  ‘Bed?’ Clyde repeated, bringing me back to the present. ‘Boyfriend?’

  ‘Peter, yes.’

  ‘Dragon,’ Clyde said dismissively.

  I hesitated, wondering what he meant. But he did give me an idea. I made sure that my pocketknife was in a trouser pocket, and left the snail waving his tentacles at the TV and shouting, ‘Eh-oh!’

  The back garden was even more of a grass and weed tangle than I’d remembered. Maybe Peter would take on the mowing and strimming once we were married. Or was I just falling into gender stereotypes? After all, I wouldn’t want him to expect me to do all the cooking, and surely we could take turns with cleaning toilets and mopping floors.

  The knife was warm as I drew it from my pocket. The wooden handle had suffered from spending time in a dragon’s digestive system, but the blade was bright and clean as I opened it half way. Then I waited, praying and hoping that none of my neighbours would decide to look over the fence to mutter about the state of my garden.

  Raven appeared ten minutes later, just as I was beginning to fret about arriving at the hospital on time. I stood back as he hovered for a moment, his blue-green wings blowing hair from my face. Then he dropped neatly into the space between the dog run and side fence.

  ‘Did it work?’ I asked, holding up the half open knife. ‘Did you realise it wasn’t an emergency?’

  He snorted. ‘I knew you weren’t in danger. Today you collect James from the hospital.’

  ‘And how did you know that?’

  ‘A passing rat told me.’

  ‘But how did the rat know?’

  Raven yawned, exposing sharp teeth and a blue tongue. ‘Rats know everything. I thought you might need me, so I kept myself available.’

  ‘Would you be willing to take me? And bring us both back?’

  ‘Certainly. James proved his courage in the hunt. He deserves a ride home on dragonback.’

  I climbed up his side and found my usual seat between two neck spines. The sores left by the short time he’d worn a saddle were, I was pleased to see, nearly healed over. I drew my coat tighter around my shoulders, then gripped the spine in front of me as he kicked away from the ground.

  From the air, I could see how spring was transforming the countryside. Not only in the new buds adding green to dry trees, but in the newly cut lawns and the yellow slashes of daffodils. More people were working in their gardens than I would have liked, and I could only hope that they didn’t think to look up. Raven would be invisible to them, of course, which would have left them wondering how a seated woman could be rushing through the air. Maybe I should buy a broomstick to slide under one leg?

  Sunshine glinting off white wings and purple snail shell made me lean close to Raven’s neck. ‘Could you slow down? Clyde’s trying to catch us up.’

  The ears flicked, and Raven angled his wings into a glide. I let go of the spine and leaned back. Clyde pulled just ahead of us, then twisted his tentacles to look back at me. I spread out my arms, and he folded his wings to let me catch him. His shell thudded against my chest, and knocked some of the air from my lungs. ‘Next time,’ I huffed, ‘just stay. At home.’

  ‘James,’ he said crossly, red and orange tingeing his grey body.

  ‘I thought you were more interested in Teletubbies.’

  ‘Family!’

  I rucked up my coat to make a better base for him. ‘Yes, Clyde. Family comes first.’

  Raven turned right and headed south-west. The concrete ribbons of the M40 and the M1 passed beneath us. A thought struck me, and I carefully pulled out my iPhone to text Caldyr. Expect a dragon at the helipad. Penny. As I slid the phone away, I mused that I could add that talent to my CV. ‘Able to send texts whilst flying on a dragon. And holding a snail shark.’

  The square shapes of the John Radcliffe Hospital came into view. Raven flew past the well marked helipad and over the main buildings. At the far end, next to the section set aside for Lloegyr related cases, a small white ‘H’ was set into a tarmac base. Raven backwinged to an easy landing, his golden claws grinding into the pavement.

  Clyde unfurled his wings and took off. I slid down from Raven’s neck and watched as the snail flew over to greet James. My brother was in a wheelchair, Caldyr walking at his side. A pretty nurse was pushing him along, her short blonde hair floating like a halo around her head.

  ‘Have you ever known a snail shark to fly?’ I asked Raven as I waited at his side.

  ‘Never. Your malwen siarc is the first I’ve ever seen.’ He snorted. ‘Just as well. They’re already dangerous enough.’

  ‘Peter thinks I should clip his wings.’

  The dragon’s response was swift and sharp. ‘You do that, and I’ll break your legs.’

  ‘Raven!’

  ‘You don’t understand. Flying…’ He twisted his neck to bring his head closer to mine. ‘To fly is everything. No creature would want to give that up.’

  ‘Even a snail shark?’

  ‘Even a snail shark. You humans have no comprehension of what flying means to us.’

  The three humans were now only twenty feet away. I stepped forward. ‘I don’t know if you have the Sight,’ I called out, ‘but there�
�s a search dragon behind me. If it’s okay for James to be flown home?’

  ‘We can see the dragon,’ the nurse reassured me. ‘We have a resident were-badger. He makes sure we retain the Sight. Oh, I’m Maria Coleman. You must be Penny? James has talked about you. And, yes, I think a dragon ride is just the ticket out of here.’

  Her smile enhanced her beauty. I felt very middle aged standing next to her. ‘Do you have everything you need, James?’

  My brother nodded. ‘Everything’s in my bag. Including my medication.’

  Maria knelt beside him. ‘Now, James, remember. We've talked about this. You’ve made a great recovery, and you have a long life to look forward to.’

  I held my breath. The James I’d known would have grinned at this sexy nurse, made a quip about his availability, and asked for her phone number. But my brother merely pushed his way out of the wheelchair, and slowly walked over to the helipad. Raven, to my surprise, lowered himself to the ground. Caldyr hurried over and offered his joined hands to give James a leg up. Then he turned and offered me the same. For a moment I hesitated, then politeness won out over feminism and I accepted, taking a seat behind my brother. Maria handed James his bag.

  Clyde started to drop down to James, who waved him away. I held out my arms instead. There was less seating space between the spines further along Raven’s neck. I unzipped my coat so Clyde could rest further up my chest. ‘Just don’t nibble anything you find there,’ I warned him.

  The flight back was at a slow pace. Raven took us on a longer route to home, avoiding some of the more highly populated areas. Lights were coming on along roads and houses as the sun dipped lower. Normally I would have enjoyed a long dragon flight, despite the numbing effect on my back and legs. But I was worried about James, who simply stared ahead rather than admire the English countryside sliding past beneath us.

  Raven’s wings almost clipped the fence as he took us down into the back garden. I slid off and removed Clyde from my coat before turning around to see if James wanted any assistance. The dragon lowered himself to the ground, giving James only a slight drop down to the tangled grass.