What's Left of Us

by Amanda Maxlyn

  I’m wiping my eyes when Parker’s deep voice interrupts us. “Mrs. Jackson, do I need to remind you what the employee handbook says about the use of cellular devices during working hours?”

  I look from Shannon to the phone still in my hands. I shake my head, my answer a barely audible, “No.”

  Composing myself, I glance his way. His face is one hundred percent serious. I look away. I feel hot and flushed with all the excitement. Parker looks between Shannon and me and I can see the smile he’s trying to hide.

  “Good.”

  Pushing off the counter, he walks away. When he’s about to round the corner again he stops, turning back to me. “Don’t let me catch you on your phone again. I’d hate to have to take action.” He leaves me to ponder his words.

  “Take action?” I mock. “Like what? Fire me?”

  Shannon laughs. “That man looked like he wanted to light a fire all right.”

  “Oh, shut it.” I giggle.

  “That man has it bad for you.”

  I nod.

  “Why didn’t you tell him, Dre?”

  “He caught me off guard.”

  “Well, go after the boss man!” she yells, scooting my chair forward.

  I move quickly, almost skipping the halls to his office. When he’s not there I go to the lounge.

  “Sorry about earlier,” he says, standing up when he sees me enter.

  “For threatening me?”

  “Threaten? I didn’t threaten.”

  “I’d hate to have to take action,” I mock in my best Parker voice.

  “Is that what I sound like?”

  “Yes.”

  He laughs the deep, throaty laugh I love to hear. “I needed to sound authoritative. Did it work?” He’s grinning from ear to ear.

  I shake my head. He reaches over and takes my hand.

  “I didn’t want Shannon to think I play favorites because you’re my wife. Boss man, huh? I like that. Can we role-play that tonight? You can play the submissive secretary. It’ll be hot.” He waggles his eyebrows.

  “This isn’t one of my books, Parker.”

  “You’re right. It’s better.”

  I laugh and he rubs a single tear lingering in the corner of my eye.

  “Hey, you okay?”

  “I got a call a little bit ago.”

  “From?”

  “Wendy.”

  I give a weak smile and the tears start to well up again. I nod in confirmation, unable to choke out the words.

  Parker’s go soft.

  Swallowing, I manage, “We’re going to have a baby.”

  “A baby?” Parker chokes. He doesn’t bother clearing his throat or trying to hide his tears.

  “Yes.”

  A lump forms in my throat. I want to say something, yell, cheer, run around—do something. But, all I can manage is to sit with my husband. I fall into his arms, gripping his shirt.

  “How in the world did I get so lucky?” he says.

  “You know what?”

  “Hmm?” He searches my happy, tear-streaked face and wipes away a tear as it slides down my cheek.

  “I’m wondering the same thing.” I’d follow this man anywhere if it meant being together forever.

  My hair is sticking to the back of my neck so I twist it into a low side bun. The warm breeze makes its way into the house through the open kitchen windows, cooling me down a little. Birds’ chirping punctuates the silence. It’s the perfect evening to sit out on the deck with a glass of wine and unwind after our busy day.

  It’s been one week since we closed on our house.

  I stand in our new kitchen, taking it all in, still amazed this house is ours. It’s one of the biggest kitchens I’ve ever seen with top-of-the-line stainless steel appliances, a wet bar built into the center island, a six-burner stove, and a double oven. I can’t cook, but this kitchen makes me want to have Genna give me a few lessons … or ten.

  I trace the silver and white swirls in the shiny countertop that feels like glass. I feel weightless as I think of how Parker knew exactly what I’d want. I couldn’t have picked a more perfect home for us.

  In the living room, where Genna and Jean are finishing hanging pictures, my favorite sign is displayed next to the front door: He Stole Her Heart, She Stole His Last Name.

  Under that is a photo that Genna took moments after Parker and I got engaged. I’m holding my left hand out, grinning up at Parker—who’s giving me a loving smile. The sand is beautiful, the sky is ocean blue, and my hair is blowing wildly. I let myself drift to the memory of that day.

  “Come on, Aundrea! Come play with us!” Parker yells. Parker and Jason had a veterinarian conference in West Palm Beach, about thirty minutes from his parents’ place in Jupiter. Genna took it upon herself to declare a vacation.

  I look up at his gorgeous smile. He’s standing barefoot in the sand next to Jason with big aviator sunglasses on, and a smile that could melt any girl into a puddle. They’ve been playing Frisbee all morning while Genna and I tan. Actually, while we try to tan. We both tend to turn lobster red rather than golden brown.

  “Nah! I’m good right here.” I’m sitting in the white beach chair with my Kindle, a glass of cold white wine, and the hot sun beating down on my pale skin. I don’t feel like moving.

  I focus my attention back on my story, but a shadow falls over me, replacing the sunlight. I don’t need to look up to know it’s Parker.

  “Hmm?” I ask, not looking up.

  “Marry me.”

  That gets my attention. I look up, lowering my sunglasses to the tip of my nose to get a better look at him. When I see his smile, I laugh.

  “Very funny.”

  “I’m not kidding,” he says with a hint of amusement.

  “Sure. Okay, and I don’t like popcorn and pickle juice,” I mock. Pushing my sunglass back on, I look back down at my Kindle. When the shadow doesn’t move, I look back up. Parker’s face has turned serious, his smile now a straight line.

  I lose all feeling in my arms and legs. I can feel the blood rushing through my veins as the world around me mutes. My heart speeds up and all I can do is stare at Parker’s face.

  “You’re serious?” I choke out.

  Parker drops to both knees in the sand so his eyes are at my level. “As serious as I’ve ever been.” I swallow hard, looking around. Genna has a big smile and Jason’s sporting an equally enthusiastic grin.

  “Pa—”

  “Before you say anything, let me speak.” He pauses, running a hand through his short blond locks. “Aundrea, I have never loved anyone the way that I love you.” He takes his sunglasses off and his eyes are soft. I can see how nervous he is as he takes both my shaking hands into his. “Shit, this is a lot harder than I thought it would be.” He laughs, looking around, then meets my eyes.

  “The day you walked into my life is the day I knew I would never be the same. Here was this woman in the men’s bathroom in the shortest, tightest, and hottest little black lace dress. I saw the shocked expression on your face and immediately fell in love with your big eyes. One look was all it took and I knew I was a goner. I swear, you saw right through me, and I knew I would stop at nothing to learn your name.” He swallows before adding, “I needed to hear your voice, and it was as if you could read my mind because just then you spoke and, my God, your voice was so beautiful.” His voice cracks at the last word, and he clears his throat.

  Tears start to fall down my cheeks and I swallow around a lump in my throat.

  Parker scoots closer to me. “Aundrea, you are mine in every way possible. Every time you walk into a room you make it brighter. You see the greatness in the world and in me. This past year and a half have been the best of my life, and it’s all because of you. You complete me. I can’t imagine going through my life without you by my side. Believe me when I say you would make me the happiest man on this planet if you agreed to be my wife.”

  “Parker.”

  My voice cracks. His name is all I
can manage as my throat becomes tight. When I see him reach into his pocket and pull out a little green box, I gasp. I cover my mouth with both hands, looking from the box to his eyes.

  “I’ve been carrying this with me since the day I bought it, waiting for the perfect moment and praying you wouldn’t catch me with it.” He looks down at the ring, then back at me, grinning. “I wanted to get you the biggest ring I could find, but when I saw this one, I knew it would be perfect for your delicate finger.”

  “It is perfect,” I say, staring at it.

  The ring is yellow gold with two rows of diamonds on either side of a large princess cut stone that sits much higher than the rest and is absolutely stunning.

  “This isn’t exactly where I thought I would ask you, but I can’t think of a better moment. Marry me, please?”

  I stare longingly at the ring in his hand with a million thoughts running through my head. He’s asking the impossible from me. Something I swore I would never do. Marriage is forever. It’s a commitment; an oath to stand by someone through the good and the bad.

  Parker has seen me at my worst and my best. He’s always by my side.

  I want to stand by his.

  Forever.

  In truth, I never wanted to get married. I never thought I’d find love in the middle of battling cancer, either. But I did.

  I want to marry Parker.

  Taking a deep breath, I begin, “Parker, I never wanted to get married—”

  “Before you break my heart and turn me down, let me just sa—”

  “Shh…” I press my finger to his lips. “I never wanted to get married until I met you. You bring out a side of me that feels as if I can take on the world. I want to take on the world with you, Parker.”

  “You’re saying yes?”

  I nod.

  “That’s a yes?” he asks again, as if to convince himself.

  “Yes!” I laugh.

  Parker engulfs me into his arms, squeezing so tightly I have to tell him to let go so I can breathe. Laughing, we continue to look at one another.

  “You’re really going to marry me?”

  “Yes, I’m going to marry you.”

  Kissing the top of my head, he keeps his arms securely around me. “I’m never letting you go, Aundrea.”

  “I won’t let you.”

  “Earth to Aundrea.” Jean waves her hand in front of my face.

  “What? I’m sorry.” My thoughts become fractured as I’m brought back.

  “I said the guys are here with food. Are you ready to take a break?”

  “Oh. Yeah, thanks.”

  I shake my head, my mind still foggy with the memory.

  In the kitchen, I greet Kevin and Jason. Parker’s taking out the plates that I just put away. Because everyone has been so gracious, offering to help us move in, we thought it would be nice to tell them our exciting news in person. Brandon and Amy had plans, so we made arrangements for them to come see the house soon.

  Genna sets Hannah down, who’s starting to get antsy. Parker walks over. “I got her; you go eat. What’s wrong, baby girl?” he asks in a sweet voice.

  Hannah starts cooing in his arms. “Oh, is that so?” She babbles some more and Parker continues talking to her as if they’re having a conversation. His version of a baby voice is pretty adorable. Jean laughs at him, but I can only close my eyes and relish the sound of his voice.

  “You’re good with her,” Genna says fondly.

  When Parker makes Hannah giggle I open my eyes and watch. It’s the perfect glimpse into what my future is about to become and I couldn’t be happier.

  “Have you talked to Wendy at all?” Jean asks.

  I break into a wide grin, meeting Parker’s eyes. My silence must give something away because when I look away from Parker, I see eight pairs of eyes on me.

  I look among them, but before I can get a word out Genna bursts into tears. Definitely overly emotional since having Hannah.

  “She’s pregnant?” Jean probes.

  Parker comes over to stand behind me, Hannah still in his arms.

  I grin. “Yes.”

  Genna sobs and then lets out a high-pitched squeal that causes Hannah to giggle. “Dre! My baby sister is going to be a mommy! Does Mom know? When did you find out? How’s Wendy doing? I can’t believe you didn’t say anything earlier!”

  “Simmer down,” I joke. “We just found out; we’ve spent the last few days processing it just the two of us. Wendy’s doing really well. So far she’s not feeling any different, but it’s very early.”

  “And Mom and Dad?”

  “You’re the first to know.”

  Everyone chimes in their congratulations; then come the hugs.

  “This is cause for celebration,” Jean announces.

  “To the bar!” Kevin cheers.

  The rest of us laugh. Leave it to these two to find a reason to go out drinking.

  “We’re all for celebrating, but maybe on a night where I’m not on call,” Parker teases.

  “Friday?” Jason asks.

  “We can get Mom and Dad to come down for the weekend to watch Hannah,” Genna exclaims.

  “I’m game,” Parkers says, handing a happy Hannah to Jason.

  “Me too.” I smile.

  “Oh, invite Amy,” Genna says excitedly.

  “I will.”

  Jean comes over and gives me another hug. “I couldn’t be more excited and happy for you, Dre. You deserve every bit of happiness. I love you.”

  “I love you too.”

  When everyone leaves I send Amy a text asking if she’s still up.

  Amy: Kind of. What’s up?

  Me: I’m sorry! Go back to sleep. I’ll call you in the morning.

  My phone rings. “Hey, I’m sorry to wake you.”

  “You didn’t.” Her voice is sleepy. She tries to clear it but it doesn’t help. “What’s going on?”

  “I wanted to call you earlier but it’s been a crazy day.” Silence. “Wendy’s pregnant.”

  “Aundrea!” Her voice cracks, followed by a groggy cough. “That is incredible news.”

  “Parker and I are still shocked that this is real. I feel like I have to pinch myself just to make sure I’m not dreaming this life.”

  “That kind of news is definitely worth not being asleep for. Thank you for calling me.”

  “Always. I’ll let you get back to sleep. First, though, if you’re free Friday night we’re going to go out and celebrate.”

  “I’ll keep you posted. My dad wanted to take Ethan fishing this weekend, so that might work, actually.”

  “Will do; goodnight.”

  “Night. Oh, and Dre?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Don’t worry about a thing. You got this.” I don’t reply and she doesn’t wait for one before hanging up.

  Back in the kitchen, Parker is finishing cleaning up. He wipes his hands after setting the last wine glass in the sink, then turns to me. He winks and I recognize the look in his eye. The look that says he’s ready to ravish me right here and now.

  “Can I help you?” I tease, scooting along the counter with a naughty grin.

  “I got to thinking.”

  “Hmm?”

  “We have to mark our territory.”

  I laugh, but he gives me a devious look. I know his looks all too well. I move quickly, but he snatches me. “Oh no you don’t,” I squeal.

  He picks me up and puts me over his right shoulder. “Parker! Put me down!” I’m only half kidding. I try to kick, but he holds my legs down.

  “The neighbors are going to hear you if you keep screaming,” he says, amused.

  “We don’t have any neighbors.” I giggle. All our neighbors are acres away, and we’re separated by trees.

  “Then you better scream really loud.”

  I talk to Wendy every night this week, to check on her and to schedule her first OB appointment.

  Jean drives back into town Friday night to go to Max’s Bar with us—where Pa
rker and I met. Genna suggested a few quiet restaurants we could go to but, in true Jean form, she wanted music, dancing, and drinks.

  Amy and I texted over the last few days. She decided to stay at her parents’ through the weekend but she insisted we get together this coming week to celebrate.

  “Let’s dance!” Jean screams into my ear. I nod, taking her hand. She leads the way, Genna holding my other hand as we squeeze through the crowd to the second level. Making our way front and center, we all start dancing foolishly and laughing at ourselves. The dance floor is packed and we’re bumping elbows with those around us, but no one seems to mind. The music is blaring and I feel each pound of the bass deep within me.

  It’s a Shakira song screaming from the speakers and I move my hips with the beat. Because I haven’t had much to drink, my dance moves are more reserved. I’ve never been a good dancer and am easily embarrassed by my awkward movements. Jean once described my dancing as uncontrolled seizing. As opposed to controlled seizing?

  It doesn’t take long before Parker joins me, pulling me hard against his chest. “I want to feel your hips move with mine,” he growls into my ear. I can smell the beer on his breath as he moves in closer.

  I oblige, pushing back into him, allowing his hands to hug my hips. We dance close for every song, paying no attention to whether it’s fast or slow. My red halter top starts to stick to my back from the heat we’re making. Parker doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, he licks across my shoulder blade.

  Parker eventually turns me to face him. I twine my arms around his neck and he rests his hands on my hips. We sway together, making eye contact. “Do you know what I’m thinking about right now?” he asks, brushing his mouth against mine.

  “No, what?”

  “Our first night. How we met and danced right here. How hard you made me every time you pressed your ass against me. I wanted to take you then and there, and then again in front of the bathroom later that night.”

  “You should have.”

  “Really?” He lifts an eyebrow. “You sure about that?” No. Maybe.

  “That night I didn’t care.” That’s the truth. “All I could think about was you taking me. I even told myself I didn’t care who was around us; I’d let you.”