Dragon's Oath (Northbane Shifters Book 5)
Page 14
Something flickered in Tiani’s eyes, then, and her lips twisted to the side, as though readying herself for bad news. Or a fight.
And I knew I couldn’t let her go. Not yet.
There was a connection between us—a strange one, but it was there. Some unspoken element or similarity that bonded us. Even when I'd been furious with her and chased her down in the woods, I couldn't repress the memory of her wide-eyed glance. That flicker of searing recognition that went beyond the physical, that same jolt that had gone through me.
Before, all of that had made me happy in an oblique way. Though I’d scoffed at her, Beylore, too, had insisted that Tiani was supposed to find out my secret and was refusing to find a way to erase her memories. Maybe I’d needed her to crash into my life and turn it upside down.
Now, though, any connection chewed at the fine lines of my self-control. An irrational burst of anger and resentment twisted through me. Why did Tiani have to stumble onto my secret? Why did I have to meet her and be tormented like this? And why wasn’t she moving?
"What?" I finally asked. The question was a harsh and jarring note in the mellow afternoon.
Tiani’s brows contracted into a tight line, and her mouth opened. But she stopped herself, and her face relaxed as she shook her head. “Forget it.”
“If you have something to say to me, then say it,” I said and folded my arms, scowling. Exhaustion drummed behind my eyes, and pain stabbed at my temple. Everything inside me was wound so tightly, I needed release. I needed her to release me.
“When is the last time you got a full night of sleep, Bane?” she asked, carefully and calmly.
Déjà vu hit me then, and I glanced around, reassuring myself I was awake. “I don’t know,” I muttered, anger collapsing into misery. I schooled my face. “Listen, I have to…well, uh. I have to go on a brief trip. I’m helping to escort Korcher north, with those kids. Turns out the Frostof want to question him…” I was rambling.
It was also a lie. Rett and Tristan were handling the Korcher transfer. I was going to go up to the mountain cabin for a few days and cool off. Stretch my wings and remember I was a goddamn Northbane Alpha. Not this half-cocked ass picking fights.
“Really?” Tiani’s lip curled, and I gave her a nonplussed look. “Okay. Have fun.” Her tone grated on my shattered nerves, and I gave her an incredulous look before I could stop myself. Tiani rolled her eyes. “You’re avoiding me, Xander.” In an undertone, she muttered, “Who knew the dragon of Winfyre could be such a child?”
Her words were a barb I should walk away from.
Instead, my temper began to rise again. “You can’t say that shit out here,” I growled and glanced around. “You don’t know who could be listening.”
“I wasn’t speaking of your shifter form, Bane,” Tiani said.
I tried not to grimace. Oh, now she was calling me Bane again? Before, she seemed to have been avoiding indulging my petty need for a fight. Now, she seemed to be poised for it. Sharpening her claws. Tiani had struck me as someone who picked fight over flight.
“I—”
“Don’t bother,” Tiani said and dismissed me with a hand wave. “You won this round.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” My control slipped even further. “Won what?”
“You know what it means, Xander,” Tiani said, and her voice was even. Steely, too. “It means you played me. You reeled me in, got friendly, got what you needed, and now you’re done.” Each word hit me like a dull blow, and air hissed between my clenched teeth. “So, what now? Oh, let me guess.” She tapped a finger mockingly on her chin. “You’re going to ship me off to Cobalt, probably. Have people keep an eye on me. Get me a nice little gig where I won’t complain. All to give me this grand illusion of freedom up here in Winfyre Ridge.”
In another frame of mind, I might have been impressed that Tiani had found the weak spot in my armor. How she’d carefully twisted her words and made it sound like I didn’t care about her; like it was my human side that was the monstrous one.
Like I’m using her for my own ends. No better than Orion.
That was the look in her eyes, and it sent a bolt of rage through me, as well as of helplessness and nausea. Was I doing that? My actions hadn’t exactly been in line with the honor the Northbane were known for.
My hand shook as I shoved them through my hair. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. And you’re not going anywhere. In fact, maybe you can come with me.”
“I’ll pass. Come back when you’re not a brooding mess, Bane.”
“Maybe I should ship your ass off somewhere,” I muttered. “Be less of a headache.”
“I didn’t ask for you to take me in,” Tiani said, and there was a real flash of pain in her eyes. “I’m not some stray off the streets, and I can take care of myself.”
“Oh, you can?” I asked, almost snarling. “That’s funny, I guess it was someone else’s half-frozen carcass I found snooping in the mountains. Someone else I took in, reunited with their friend, and have been trying to protect.”
“Oh, spare me your Northbane hospitality,” Tiani snapped.
"Sorry we fed and clothed you, Tiani. Next time, we'll know better."
“You just don’t want to admit that you’re a little bit human, Bane,” Tiani said. Her breathing was growing shallow, and her fists clenched. “I mean, Spirits forbid you don’t strut around with an icicle up your ass like a distant, benevolent god we’re all supposed to fawn over.”
A bitter laugh escaped me. “Please. I don’t ask for anything. You didn’t even know who I was at first. I’m not some Greyclaw who needs constant adulation.”
“At least the Greyclaw don’t pretend like they don’t think they’re better than everyone else.”
"Do they also pretend to have a use for a nosy stasis?"
I thought Tiani was going to hit me across the face for that. Instead, she looked away and hissed, “You know what, you fed me some real pretty lines, Bane.” She threw her hands up and glared at me. “Like I said. You win. You got me. You played me like a damn fiddle.”
“I didn’t do a damn thing except try to keep your ass alive.”
“Please,” Tiani snorted. “For a second, I really thought we were more than two people in a shitty situation with our backs against the wall.” These words were tumbling from a hotter and angrier place. “I thought we could be friends.”
“So did I,” I said with a humorless laugh. “Hell, I wish we could be.”
The words were a wrenched admission on my part, but Tiani misconstrued them. She jerked back, and her hands pressed to her stomach. Dropping my gaze for the first time, I saw her jaw tighten and work. Though she didn’t move, I had a sense she was recoiling from me.
My heart dropped. What was I doing? I was a Northbane shifter. We didn’t act like this. Suddenly, I remembered that Tiani had never had any family except for Iris. Iris, who had told me how Tiani had been shunted around as a kid, never in the same place for long. Never wanted. So, she’d toughened herself up. What the hell was wrong with me?
“Tiani, I didn’t—” I started to say.
“You are a real bastard, Bane,” Tiani interrupted, cool and furious. “No wonder why you don’t want people to see your real face.”
With that, she whirled around and vanished into the house, leaving me out in the cold.
And in silent agreement.
Chapter Fifteen
Xander
Opinionated, wise-mouthed, and sassy. Restless and impatient. Messy and disorganized.
Always trying to outsmart me. Always has to be a step ahead.
Always has to be right.
Someone tapped my shoulder, and I jerked upright, startling the girl standing next to me, who promptly dropped the papers she was holding. For a moment, neither of us said anything, and then Drue Grace laughed.
“Oh, Drue, I’m sorry,” I said, getting up to help the curly-haired brunette who had somehow gone from a shy eleve
n-year-old to an efficient part-time office assistant and Vixen rookie at sixteen. “I didn’t even hear you come in. Let me help.”
“It’s okay, Uncle Xander,” Drue said cheerfully from where she was restacking the papers on the floor. I squatted down to help and gave her a small smile. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“It’s not just anyone who can do that,” I said. “Stealth training going well?”
Drue wiggled her eyebrows at me, and I laughed. Though Drue and her brother Bix were technically Luke and Reagan’s extended family, they’d gotten close to the rest of the Northbane Alphas as well. Along with their best friend Gabriel Juarez and his little sister, they called us “uncle.” When Drue had first started working here, though, she’d been quiet and nervous. But over time, she’d come out of her shell and now had zero fear around me. It was nice.
As we finished picking up the rest of the papers, Drue handed them to me and tilted her head. “You didn’t hear me knock, did you, Unc?”
“No,” I said. “My mind has been elsewhere.”
Drue gave me a sympathetic look. “It’s a lot, huh? Don’t worry—soon me, Bix, and Gabriel will be able to help you even more.” She rolled her eyes. “Just gotta finish school and training.”
“Education is important, sassy,” I said. “Gotta be able to think on your feet.” I sat back down, and Drue nodded, bouncing from foot to foot. “Something else, Ms. Grace?”
“Uh, yeah.” She suddenly looked a little guilty. “Reagan and Iris…” I raised my eyebrows at her. “They said you slept here last night. Do you need more help or something?”
How the hell did they figure that out? I wondered. Did Tiani tell them?
“Cassidy said you didn’t go home,” Drue offered. She had an uncanny ability to read my expressions. “You’re not sick, are you?”
“What?” I asked. Cassidy was Reagan’s sister and one of Winfyre’s healers. “No, no, merely busy. There's a pretty good couch here, and so I stayed here. Nothing unusual."
Drue made a face. “Uncle Xander, I don’t know—you don’t really seem like yourself. You’re kind of a mess, and you seem…” Her shoulders lifted and fell with slow emphasis. “Down.”
“I’m a mess?” I asked with a laugh, rubbing a hand over my unruly beard. “Well, I did sleep in these clothes.” To my surprise, Drue hopped around the desk and plopped a kiss on my forehead. I gave her a surprised look. “What was that for?”
“Everything is going to be okay,” Drue said and patted my shoulder. “Don’t work too hard.”
“Drue, is there something I should know?” I asked dryly.
She shook her head and raced for the exit. “See ya, Unc!”
I guessed I could use a shower. It had been a day and a half since I’d gotten into a spat with Tiani, and I hadn’t been home since. Reagan and Cassidy had both been by HQ, running errands, and must have put two and two together. The Grace girls were sharp.
I also wondered if they’d put Drue up to a dual guilt and reconnaissance trip.
Yeah, I could use a shower and my own bed. But I also didn’t want to deal with Tiani. Instead, I’d thrown myself into the problem haunting our borders. We still had no leads on the killer stalking our borders, so I’d decided to review all the evidence we’d collected so far.
I’d plotted out several new locations to scout and was considering going out to look at them on my own. Though we’d had no more bodies show up covered in bloody writing, I didn’t want to take any chances. The sooner we solved it, the better.
However, any time my brain wasn’t focused on Winfyre, it circled back to Tiani. My brain would bark and froth up lists of things that drove me crazy about her. But they were also things I liked about her. I couldn’t win.
And I couldn’t keep avoiding her.
With a sigh, I shoved my chair back and reached for my jacket. I was just sliding it on when Drue burst back into my office.
“Xander!” Her face was white, and I rushed over to her. She grabbed my arm. “Fallon needs you—she needs you right away.”
“Okay, I’m going,” I said and squatted down to get a better look at her. “Drue, what’s wrong?”
“I-I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but Fallon and Deena, I-I heard them talking…” Her throat worked, and her eyes were glassy. “They said Jack and Enzo were missing.” My heart plummeted, and Drue’s grip tightened. “Are they okay? I saw them last week—I mean, they have to be okay…”
At that moment, I didn't know what to say. Jack and Enzo Grant were two eighteen-year-old rookies with the Tiselk Rangers. A lot of the time, they brought supplies to elderly folks who lived in more remote areas. We’d agreed to let them do patrol rounds between Veda and Cobalt to learn more about surviving off the grid if they got in trouble. They were supposed to stick with their assigned veterans. But if they’d ventured off…
“I don’t know, Drue,” I finally said gently, and put an arm around her, leading her downstairs with me. “But I’ll find out.”
There was a flurry of activity here. Fallon was standing there, tall and serious, every inch the leader of the Vixens. She had several of them grouped around her, listening intently as she gave out quiet orders and gestured at a map. On the other side, I saw several shell-shocked shifters, looking worse for the wear of just having come off a patrol. Kal and Luke were there, asking questions, while the patrol leader, Jeques, listened intently and made notes.
I gave Drue a reassuring squeeze. “Why don’t you go home?”
“I’ll take her,” said a soft voice, and Cassidy was there, arms opening. Drue rushed at her and was enveloped in a hug. “Anything else you might need, Xander?”
“No, I don’t…” I trailed off and squinted at her. For a split-second, I hedged, then I gave a terse nod and said in a slow, measured way, “Actually, there is one thing.”
Cassidy gave me a smile. “I’ll go right now.” She’d turned and was leading Drue out the front doors before I could even respond.
Then I shoved that out of my mind as I walked over to Jeques, Kal, and Luke. The shifters all shrank in their chairs, and I internally blew out a sigh. This was looking bad.
Someone had disobeyed a direct order.
Before I could ask what had happened, there was a commotion at the front door, and I turned, foreboding filling me.
Cliff and Rose, two of our fastest trackers and runners, were in the entrance, shaking with exhaustion and accepting cups of water. Cliff was a young white wolf, and his face was blotchy with exertion but white underneath. His eyes seemed unfocused until they landed on me.
His jaw tightened, and he stood up straight. Rose, noticing that, did as well.
Oh no.
Both of them made their way over, and I gestured to Kal, Luke, and Fallon. Together, the six of us went into another room and shut the door. Luke’s entire face was knotted in pain, while Fallon had gone white. Kal looked impassive except for a tic in his jaw.
My face, meanwhile, felt numb. As though I’d exhausted my ability to react to things externally and was bleeding to death inside.
Rose and Cliff exchanged a look, then Rose nodded, steeling herself.
"Bane, sir, we realize we're ahead of schedule," Rose said. “And we’re missing part of our crew, but there were extenuating circumstances.”
I blinked at them, confused, then I remembered that they’d been on their way back from the Frostof. For a second, I wondered if there was a chance this had nothing to do with Jack and Enzo. However, there were few circumstances that called for a crew splitting up.
“On our way back…” Jack spoke up, struggling as his face contorted with horror. “We…”
I put a hand over my face. “You found them.”
When I got back to the bungalow, my entire body felt displaced from time and space. It was the same dragging grief and bewilderment that had filled me when Brody had died. Anger flickered and died in random intervals as I quietly made my way to the bathroom.
I nee
ded to take a shower. I needed hot water to scald away the sweat, snow, and blood of this terrible day. I needed a small amount of comfort in this cold, screaming place of horror.
Every breath raked itself from my chest, stuttering with pain.
Random images kept flickering through my mind. Beylore striding through the sunset, the light moving around her like a live flame, her face hard and set. Rett putting his hands over his face when we told him what had happened. Tristan shifting into a tiger, his gleaming coat rippling with rage and grief. The splatter of bright blood on white snow.
And the blank gaze of two kids up at an empty sky.
We’d retrieved those boys and brought them to Veda. It had been decided that we were going to make the deaths public knowledge. We had to, as we had no leads and no excuse for keeping this a secret any longer. Still, I hated that people were going to feel trapped and unsafe here. The whole point of the Northern Wilds territories being allies was that the whole of it was supposed to be safe.
Winfyre’s greatest strength was also its greatest weakness.
We protected people from the dangers outside our borders, but, like any stronghold, if those walls fell, then what?
Which meant it was also time to go over evacuation drills again. Everyone hated them and chafed at them, but they were necessary. We had to be careful.
I’d been in the shower so long, the water became cold, and I made myself get out. Every texture felt strange to my pruned fingers, and I shivered as I went downstairs. I dressed in the dark, pulling on the first pair of sweats I found and a soft t-shirt.
My mind kept spinning, and I went out into the kitchen, starving and not starving. Exhausted and wide-awake. I couldn’t take much more of this. Being pulled apart while I felt like I was being compacted at the same time.
Restless, I walked around and around, thinking through everything. Trying to figure out if we could pull more shifters to investigate this killer without exposing our borders.
You have to contact the Tiselk Rangers tomorrow; they need to know.