Vanishing Dreams: Vanishing Dreams (Devil's Bend #2)
Page 19
Katie wasn’t so sure that was a good idea, but she didn’t argue.
A minute later, when they stepped into the shadows of the barn, Katie’s nerves decided to disrupt her thoughts. She was alone with Dalton.
Alone and intently aware of him.
“Come on,” he encouraged, gently tugging her arm.
“Where are we going?” she asked, glancing around and noticing all of the equipment they stored there. Surprisingly, there weren’t any animals as she’d suspected there would be.
“Hayloft,” he answered roughly.
Katie glanced up, noticing another level. It, in fact, did have hay up there, but she got the feeling they didn’t actually store the hay there.
Dalton took a step back when they reached the wooden ladder that went straight up. He wanted her to go first, she realized.
After taking a deep breath and resigning herself to having this conversation with him, Katie grabbed the wooden rungs and began climbing. When she reached the top, she crawled onto the plywood floor, putting several feet between herself and the edge. Now probably wasn’t a good time to tell Dalton that she was scared of heights.
Dalton propelled himself around the ladder like a man who’d done it a million times. He had to duck to avoid a few wooden beams that were attached to the ceiling, but he made his way around and then dropped onto a hay bale.
“Come here,” he insisted. His tone left no room for argument, which put her on the defense instantly.
But rather than argue with him, she pushed to her feet and reached for his hand when he held it out to her. He pulled her toward him and then motioned for her to sit beside him.
“What’s going on, Katie?” he asked bluntly, his elbows resting on his knees, hands hanging between his legs.
“You tell me,” she replied, unsure where this was going. Seriously, the man had brought her here. What was she supposed to say to that?
“Did Tessa know you had a sister?” he asked directly, tilting his head enough to look over at her beneath the brim of his hat.
“No,” Katie answered honestly. There were too many lies between them, and now that Dalton had figured her out, she knew there was no reason to keep up the charade. And quite frankly, she felt a little better without the weight of all her secrets sitting on her shoulders.
“Do y’all live with your mom?”
“Nope,” she told him. “She left when I was eighteen.”
Dalton’s head snapped toward her, his eyes studying her face. She didn’t need to elaborate; he knew exactly what she was telling him.
“You’ve been raising that little girl since you were eighteen?”
Yep, he came to the correct conclusion all on his own.
Katie nodded.
Dalton pushed to his feet, pulling his hat off his head and shoving his hand through his hair. “Holy shit.” He turned to face her, pressing his hat back on his head.
God, he really was the most attractive man she’d ever met. In his Wranglers and boots, Stetson on his head, and a dark T-shirt plastered to the hard planes of his chest, the man made her mouth water.
“Is she…?”
He let the question hang, but Katie knew what he was asking. “Lexi has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. She’s predominantly inattentive, which you’ve probably noticed by how quiet she is. She has also been diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder,” she answered. “Some days are better than others.”
“Holy shit, Katie. Why the hell would you have kept her a secret all this time? You’ve got friends who would help you.”
Katie felt her ire rising. This man pretended to know her, but he seemed to forget that they hadn’t shared their deepest, darkest secrets with one another during the brief time they’d been together. She didn’t owe him any explanations. Pushing to her feet, Katie ran her hands over her skirt, sucked in a deep breath, and let it out slowly.
Keeping her tone even and trying to pretend she didn’t give a shit what he thought about her, she said, “I’m not sure why you’re all of a sudden worried about me, Dalton. I’ve spent the last five years managing my sister on my own without needing help from anyone else. And just because you met her a few days ago, you don’t have the right to question how I’ve managed my life or hers up to this point.”
“Damn it, Katie. That’s not what I’m sayin’,” Dalton barked. “She’s a great kid. You’ve done a fantastic job raisin’ her. I just want to know why you thought you had to go this alone.”
Katie’s anger got the best of her. “Fuck you, Dalton. Alone is all I’ve ever been, don’t you get it? No one sticks around. No one. And with my ... choice of occupation, I don’t gain a whole lot of respect. You think I would’ve wanted that for my sister? You honestly think I would’ve wanted to introduce you to her so that you could abandon her, too? You didn’t know me. Not the real me. And then you found out that I’m a stripper and what did you do? You did exactly what I thought you would do. You looked down your nose at me. That’s the reason I’ve done this alone. I don’t want to depend on someone else who’s gonna bail when things get tough. And trust me, every day is a coin toss with Lexi. Some good. Some bad. I’m in it for the long haul. I don’t need any part-timers disrupting our lives, thank you very much.”
Katie was fighting the angry tears that flooded her eyes. The last thing she wanted was for Dalton to see her cry. She was done.
Heading toward the ladder, Katie just wanted to get away from him. She didn’t need his questions and accusations. She had enough guilt that she’d piled on herself; his wasn’t welcome.
Before she could move past him, Dalton put his arm out and stopped her, then easily pulled her into his arms. She tried to push him away, but his grip just tightened. And then the tears began to fall, which only pissed her off more. She pounded on his chest, trying to get him to leave her alone, but the stubborn man didn’t back down. He merely pulled her closer, crushing her to his chest, capturing her arms between them.
Right then and there, Katie broke down. She cried for the injustice of it all. For her baby sister being abandoned, for having to live her life with a debilitating disease that most people didn’t understand, for the baby growing inside of her. And she cried for herself. For the fact that she had made decisions that she regretted but couldn’t take back. And she shed more tears for the man whose arms were wrapped tightly around her, because if ever there was someone she wanted in her life, Dalton was that person.
And the worst part of it all, Katie loved him. She had loved him for so long, but the hell she’d put them both through by walking away wasn’t something she wanted to endure again. He had reacted exactly as she had expected him to, which was the only reason she’d broken things off with him. And leaving him was harder than anything she’d ever done before.
Katie wasn’t sure that was something they could ever get past.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Everything made perfect fucking sense.
Too much sense.
As he held Katie in his arms, her small body shuddering as she sobbed, Dalton hated himself for what they’d put each other through. They were both to blame. She had walked away from him without giving him an explanation, and he had just let her go, not fighting for what they’d had. And she was right. When he had learned the truth, he had turned his back on her without giving her a chance to explain. He had jumped to conclusions, making her out to be something evil, something vindictive.
But she wasn’t.
Katie wasn’t manipulative. She wasn’t out to hurt anyone.
She was trying to survive.
And now they’d come full circle.
“Katie,” he whispered, pressing his lips to her forehead. “Baby, I’m so damn sorry.”
Clearly that was the wrong thing to say, because Katie pushed him, and this time he took a step back, giving her space.
“Fuck you,” she snapped. “I don’t want your pity, Dalton. I don’t need it.”
Dalton knew that everyt
hing he said was coming out wrong. But that was what Katie expected from him, and he honestly couldn’t blame her. He had turned his back on her the same way she had him.
That didn’t mean he wasn’t ready to repent. This woman did things to him that no other woman ever had, and as he knew she deserved someone who would be there for her no matter what, someone who would fight to protect her, to take care of her, Dalton wasn’t going to leave her alone. He wasn’t turning his back on her again.
With an urgency that took him by surprise, Dalton closed the gap between them, cupping her face and tilting her chin so that she had to look at him, and then melded his mouth to hers.
Her soft moan nearly ripped him apart, the way she gave in to him so easily, so thoroughly.
“Katie,” he groaned, pulling his mouth from hers momentarily. “I can’t do this anymore. I can’t stay away.”
To his surprise, she pulled him to her, their lips sealing together once more. The kiss erupted into a firestorm, a conflagration of sensual need. It overwhelmed him, stripped him bare.
“I’ve missed you,” he whispered, sliding his hands down her hips and lifting her, forcing her to wrap her legs around his waist.
Dalton carried her to the hay bale. He lowered himself, Katie straddling his lap, her skirt bunching around her thighs. He palmed the back of her head, his other arm banding around her waist, unable to let her go.
The kiss continued, Dalton thrusting his tongue into Katie’s sweet, welcoming mouth. He’d missed this. Missed touching her, holding her. If she’d let him, he’d sit right there and kiss her all damn day.
“What are we doin’, Dalton?” she asked, drawing back from him. Her arms wreathed his neck, and she didn’t pull away, which he considered a good sign.
“I don’t know,” he told her honestly. “But I don’t want it to end, Katie. I…” He couldn’t complete the sentence, fearful that he was cutting himself open for her and she would just let him bleed out.
“I have to know,” Katie said, her voice more insistent. “I have to know what you want from me. I’m still that same girl. I’m still a stripper, Dalton. Even if I’m not doing it for a while. I will have to eventually. As much as I hate it, that’s the only way I can make a living, the only way I can make enough to take care of Lexi and put myself through school.”
“What do you mean you’ll have to do it again eventually?” he asked, trying to piece together everything she’d just told him.
When Katie tried to move out of his arms, he held her there, refusing to let her go.
“Talk to me, Katie. This is how we got here in the first place. You need to talk to me.”
Katie’s eyes met his, and another tear leaked down her cheek. She kept her eyes on his as she reached for his hand, taking it in hers and then pressing it to her belly.
Dalton’s heart stopped beating. He was pretty damn sure he was going to pass out as he glanced down at their joined hands, then back up to meet her eyes.
“You’re…?”
“I’m pregnant. I’ve been wanting to tell you,” she said quickly, obviously feeling the need to explain. “I didn’t want to tell your voice mail, so I was waiting for a time we could talk. Last night just didn’t seem like the right moment.”
“Oh, fuck.” He exhaled heavily, watching her closely.
The fact that he wasn’t angry that she hadn’t told him wasn’t lost on him. Her explanation actually did make sense. She had tried to call him before, but he hadn’t answered, and he had never returned her calls. The few times he’d come back during his tour, he had tried to stay as far away from her as possible. And he completely agreed, last night, that kind of news wouldn’t have gone over well.
Dalton swallowed around the lump in his throat and pressed his hand more firmly to her belly. “Oh, God, Katie.”
For the first time in as long as he could remember, Dalton actually cried.
He broke down right there, and when Katie wrapped her arms around him, holding him tight, he let it all out.
Dalton had no idea how long they sat like that, but the next thing he knew, he was lowering Katie to the hay at their feet, his mouth pressed to hers. She tasted so familiar, so sweet.
Without thinking, his emotions guiding his every movement, Dalton slid his hand beneath Katie’s skirt, then slipped his finger beneath her panties, finding her warm and wet. He continued to kiss her while Katie worked the button and zipper of his jeans, releasing him from the denim confines before wrapping her arms around his neck once again.
He tugged at her panties until they ripped, unable to take the time to remove them properly before he was guiding himself into her.
“Oh, fuck, Katie. Oh, God, baby.” It was too good.
“I love you, Dalton,” Katie whispered against his mouth.
He pulled his head back slightly so he could look into her eyes. Holding himself up with one forearm, Dalton lifted her leg, pulling it up against his hip as he ground his hips against hers, driving deeper into her welcoming body.
“I love you, darlin’. I’ve loved you this whole time.”
More tears fell from Katie’s eyes, and Dalton couldn’t contain his own emotions. While he continued to slide deep into her, he pressed his face into the crook of her neck. This was the only place in the world that he wanted to be. Right here, with Katie, wrapped in her arms, buried in her body. He could spend eternity right here and he’d never have one single complaint.
“Dalton. Oh, God, it’s … it’s been too long. I’m gonna…”
Katie’s body tensed as her sentence trailed off, and Dalton let go, following her lead, coming deep inside of her.
Dalton didn’t pull out of her right away, didn’t want to move from where he was, so he hovered over her, careful not to put his weight on her as he did. He lifted his head and smiled down at her. “Have dinner with me tonight,” he finally said, his thumb grazing her soft, smooth cheek. “You and Lexi. Let me cook you dinner.”
“I don’t know…” Katie’s gaze slid away from his, but Dalton wasn’t finished.
“Look at me, Katie.” He waited until she did before he continued. “What we started all those months ago … we’re right back there. I’m not letting you walk away again. I know you thought you were doing what was best for me, but you were wrong. What’s best for me is you. Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”
Katie’s eyes narrowed on his face, but she didn’t respond.
“I love you, Katie. I’ve never said those three words to another woman before. I’ve never felt anything for anyone like what I feel for you. I’ve beaten myself up for letting you walk away. I should’ve come after you, should’ve begged you to stay. Give me a chance to show you what you mean to me.”
“I hurt you, Dalton.”
Dalton hadn’t expected that, but he nodded his head, unable to deny the truth. “You did. More than you know. But that was the past. This is now. The only thing we have is that. There’s no time for regrets.”
“I don’t want Lexi to get hurt,” she said softly. “She likes you, Dalton. That might mean a lot to you, but for her, it’s a really big deal. She doesn’t get close to many people. I don’t want her to get close to you just so you can turn and walk away.”
“I’m not going anywhere, Katie.”
Katie pulled her eyes away, looking behind him. He could tell she was considering his request.
Dalton tipped his head forward and pressed his forehead against hers. “Darlin’, I’m a firm believer that things happen for a reason. You and me. Maybe then wasn’t the right time. But now is. I know that, and I hope you do, too. As for Lexi, I’ll love her with my whole heart.”
Lifting his head, Dalton met her gaze once again.
He feared that he wasn’t going to win this battle. No matter how hard he tried, they had too much history between them, and she was too protective to let him back in. But he wanted in.
And he was tired of backing down. Tired of letting the universe dictate to him.
He wanted to control his life; he wanted to choose what the outcome would be. And if he got hurt in the process, so be it. Otherwise, he was still hurt, and he knew without a doubt that having to be around Katie all the time wasn’t going to help. He was going to spiral out of control until he couldn’t take it anymore. And then he’d be gone. Back on the road, back on tour, burying himself in work, and never enjoying a minute of it.
He was tired of being that guy.
Dalton began moving inside her again, his cock still hard, still eager to be right there in her. Katie’s eyes closed briefly, her head tilting back.
“I want to make love to you for the rest of my life,” he said, his voice raspy with emotion. He pushed in deep, pulling out slowly, her pussy gripping him tightly. “I want to have plenty of babies with you. I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy, helping you take care of your sister.”
Katie’s arms came up around his neck, holding him tight as he continued to rock against her.
“One chance, Katie. One chance. That’s all I’m asking for. I…” Dalton sucked in a breath and pulled back to meet her eyes again. “I need you, Katie. I love you.”
Tears formed in her eyes, but she didn’t look away. He considered that a good sign.
She nodded, and Dalton pressed his lips to hers, his hips beginning to move faster, thrusting harder, unable to resist the velvet grip of her pussy. She was so tight, so hot. He’d missed her. He’d missed this.
“Come for me, Katie,” he whispered.
Katie’s head tilted back, the narrow column of her throat exposed to him. Unable to resist, he pressed his lips there once before pulling back and driving into her. Her legs came up to cradle his hips, holding him tightly.
“That’s it, baby. Love me, Katie.”
“Dalton.” Katie ground out his name as her body tightened, her pussy milking him once again.
When she came down, he stopped moving. He wasn’t going to come again. Not yet. But that hadn’t been about him. That was all for her.
Rolling off her so that he didn’t crush her, Dalton dropped to his back and stared up at the ceiling.