Home is Where the Heart Is (Home #1)

by Cheynee Filkov

  She blushed, looking down at the controller in her hands so she wouldn’t have to meet his gaze.

  “And just so you know, I won’t ever try to kiss you again, not unless you give me permission to.”

  Isabelle stared over at him with wide eyes as a crushing disappointment slammed into her body. She opened her mouth to say something, anything but found she had no words.

  “Ready to kill some bitches?” he asked her with a very platonic smile.

  She smiled back at him and nodded, trying to ignore the stab of loss she felt in her gut.

  *

  Jace stayed true to his word. For the next few days he was nothing but causal and friendly with Isabelle as she spent the majority of her time hanging out with him, Maia and Matt.

  There was no longer any longing in his eyes when he looked at her and he made no effort to kiss her or touch her in any kind of flirtatious way at all.

  She hated herself for being so down about the lack of affection. This is what she had wanted and this is what she had forced him into. She had no right to be upset or disappointed. But she was.

  As she looked over at his toned body, contorting as he jumped up to smack the volleyball over the net she felt such a strong sense of longing.

  “Enjoying the view?” Maia asked teasingly.

  Isabelle smiled over at her and shrugged. “It’ll do.”

  Maia settled her beach chair closer to Isabelle’s and then they both stared over at Jace and Matt playing beach volleyball with some guys.

  “So, five days left of freedom and then it’s back to the torture of school life,” Maia sighed deeply.

  “I’m a little bit excited, is that weird?” Isabelle asked, her eyes still tracking Jace.

  “Yes, but luckily for you, your weirdness is part of your charm,” Maia replied with humour.

  “I just want to get into a routine,” Isabelle explained. “I function better with routines.”

  “Not me, I like the unpredictability of life. I love waking up each day and not knowing what I’ll be doing or where life might take me.”

  Isabelle smiled over at her friend, and in the week they’d spent together she was sure of their friendship. It was something unexpected and, at times, a little unsettling but something she had come to treasure, something that she found herself looking forward to from the minute she awoke. So strange that in a short amount of time she felt more connected to Maia than her other friends she’d grown up with, well except for…

  “There’s another pool party at Ben’s tonight,” Maia told her. “Feel like coming?”

  Isabelle groaned. “Am I going to get beaten in front of half the school again?”

  Maia’s face darkened. “No, that won’t happen to you ever again.”

  Isabelle felt her heart fluttering with nerves at even the thought of facing those people again, even though her bruises had now faded.

  “I’m always going to be the new girl that got punched at a party,” she said quietly.

  “Only if you refuse to move forward,” Maia pointed out. “Just come tonight and it will be like a do over. You know more people now so it won’t be as confronting, and this time you can let your hair down a little bit.”

  Isabelle bit her lip as she felt torn about her choices. She did want to try and expand a bit and do more than just sit at home wallowing in her own self-pity… but she also wanted to try and avoid unwanted attention and she was absolutely sure that’s what this party would bring.

  “Isabelle, I can’t believe I even have to sell this to you,” Maia stated in frustration. “Beautiful house, no parents, good times, good people, hot guys half naked. Do I need to go on?”

  Isabelle eyed Jace again; his body lean with muscles, a healthy tan on his skin. So beautiful, so alive and so not hers.

  “Jace will be there,” Maia told her with a smirk.

  Isabelle rolled her eyes at Maia. “Like that is going to be my deciding factor.”

  But it was and Maia knew it too.

  “You let yourself believe whatever you have to,” she told Isabelle smugly. “But we both know you’re going tonight.”

  Isabelle nudged her playfully and looked back over to the boys only to find them heading towards them.

  “Enjoying the game, babe?” Matt asked as he leant down to place a kiss on Maia’s lips.

  “There could have been more nakedness,” she said slyly. “But I guess it was still fun.”

  Matt laughed and lifted Maia up, taking her place on the seat and settling her back on his lap, their lips meeting before they even hit the chair.

  “So, did you win?” Isabelle asked Jace, trying to ignore the couple beside her.

  Jace spun around, gesturing to his body. “Does it look like this was built to lose?”

  No, his body looked built for a lot of things but losing was not one of them.

  Isabelle shrugged at him instead. “Maybe.”

  Jace grinned, plopping down on the sand next to her. “Have you eaten yet?”

  In reply Isabelle’s stomach growled. She clutched at her bare stomach, her face ashen.

  “Guess that would be a no?” Jace asked with a smile.

  “I’ve been too busy working on a tan to eat,” she replied lightly.

  He grinned. “Well, unless you were going for radioactive tomato, I suggest you give the sun a break for a bit and we go get some lunch.”

  She was ready to tell him that she was fine but her damn traitor stomach sounded off again, making the decision for her.

  “Yeah, I guess I could eat,” she offered turning to Maia. “Maia, do you want to come get some lunch with us?”

  Still tangled in Matt’s body, Maia made no move that she’d even heard.

  “They won’t be due to come up for air for a while,” Jace informed her as he got to his feet and held his hand out to her. “Coming?”

  With only a brief moment of hesitation Isabelle allowed him to pull her to her feet. She slid her thongs on and pulled a light slip over her body so she didn’t feel so exposed and followed Jace away from the sand.

  “So, what do you feel like?” he asked as they put more and more distance between themselves and the beach.

  Isabelle was so hungry she’d take a hobo’s lunch at this stage.

  “I’m good with anything.”

  He winked. “That’s a dangerous thing to ask for.”

  It was the first somewhat flirty thing he had said to her in days and the sheer pleasure of it had her blushing deeply.

  He laughed at her reaction and then let a silence settle between them as he moved to his Ute, opening the passenger door for her.

  “I’m going to get sand everywhere,” she protested.

  He gave her a light push forward. “It’s not that big of a deal. I’ll clean it tomorrow anyway, and if you still feel guilty by then, you can help.”

  Seeing in his gaze that he wasn’t going to change his mind anytime soon, Isabelle pulled herself up into the seat and let Jace softly shut her in.

  Her heart raced as she remembered the last time she’d been alone in his car with him.

  She’d all but jumped from his grasp, bruising her knees in her scramble to get away. She looked over at him now and knew that things had changed between them since that day and there was no risk of him trying to kiss her again.

  “Do you like fajitas?” he asked after a while.

  “I’ve never had them before,” she admitted.

  “What? What have you been doing with your life?” he asked in mock outrage. “We’ll head over to mine and I’ll hook you up. I warn you now though, your life is about to change.”

  Isabelle grinned at him. “I think I can handle it.”

  She loved this little banter between them, loved how easy it was to be around him and how light and normal he made her feel. It had been two weeks since The Incident and without even realising he was doing it, this gorgeous boy had been healing her without asking for anything in return.

  She looked do
wn at his hand on the gear stick and wanted to place her hand on top of his. She wanted to hold his hand and give him that tiny moment of gratitude and affection; she wanted to give him a tiny piece of herself.

  But she didn’t and she wouldn’t, because essentially she was a coward.

  “Hey look, someone’s on your balcony,” Jace said, breaking her from her thoughts.

  Isabelle whipped her head up. “What?”

  Jace pointed up to her house as he pulled into his driveway. “See? Looks like a guy, do you have any cousins coming to stay?”

  Isabelle moved slowly, unbuckling herself and forcing herself out of the car, her steps growing heavier as she neared the house because she knew, even without the visual proof, who it was.

  “Isabelle?” Jace asked hesitantly. “Do you know him? Should I call someone? Do you want me to kick his arse?”

  “It’s my best friend,” she whispered. “That’s Tate.”

  Jace stared over at her in shock.

  “The one you’ve been avoiding?” he asked slowly.

  Isabelle forced air in and out of her lungs. She was not going to have a panic attack in front of Jace, not now when things were finally starting to look up.

  “Yeah, Mum and Dad must have invited him,” she replied shakily.

  Jace looked uncertain, slowing as they drew closer to her door.

  “Do you want me to leave you guys alone?”

  Yes. No. Maybe.

  “I don’t know,” she admitted quietly.

  Tate disappeared from the balcony swiftly, slamming the door behind him loud enough for Isabelle and Jace to hear.

  Jace’s jaw locked. “I’ll walk you in.”

  She could tell by his tone of voice that it was non-negotiable. Swallowing the big lump in her throat, she stood by her front door dreading the wrath that was about to burst from it.

  A moment later the door opened forcefully and then there was Tate.

  Handsome, steady and very, very furious.

  Jace sensing all of this, moved forward with purpose.

  “Hey man, Jace Scown, you must be Isabelle’s best friend Tate.”

  He held a hand out that Tate ignored as his eyes held Isabelle’s.

  “I’m surprised she mentioned me at all,” he said coldly.

  Isabelle felt tears threatening to fall.

  “Tate must be tired from his flight,” she said tersely. “Please ignore his rudeness.”

  Tate’s eyes flared for a moment before landing shrewdly on Jace.

  “So you’re who?”

  Jace stiffened at the hostile tone. “Isabelle’s friend, I live next door.”

  Tate raised an eyebrow. “How convenient.”

  Anger boiled in Isabelle’s stomach. “You’re being an arsehole,” she told Tate firmly, who jerked back from her in shock. “And if you only came here to be rude to me and my friends then I suggest you leave now.”

  Tate stared at her in disbelief for a few moments before turning to Jace.

  “Sorry, it’s nice to see Izzy has some friends,” he said stiffly.

  Jace nodded woodenly then turned to Isabelle. He took one of her hands gently and ignored her flinch at his touch.

  “I’m going to leave you guys to catch up but I’m just going to be next door if you need me.”

  Basically he would be waiting by his balcony, ready to jump over to hers at the first sign of trouble.

  Isabelle smiled at him warmly with a nod to let him know that it’s ok.

  “Right next door,” he repeated, this time looking right at Tate before turning away and walking over to his house briskly.

  “That your new boyfriend?” Tate asked as he crossed his arms over his chest.

  “Shut up and get inside,” she hissed, pushing him forward to make her point.

  They walked up to her room in silence, both quietly seething and shaking with anger.

  “You shouldn’t have come here,” she told him once they were in the privacy of her room, the door closed firmly.

  “Yeah well, you left me no choice. If it were up to you we’d just throw away a lifetime of friendship.”

  His biting words hurt her but she couldn’t show weakness, not now. Not if she wanted him to leave, and she needed him to leave.

  “I figured you would have gotten the hint that I wanted a fresh start,” she retorted, moving to the balcony and easing the door open a bit.

  “That is such bullshit! You don’t just give up on people you care about, at least you never used to.”

  “I don’t want to have this conversation with you.”

  “You don’t want to have any conversation with me! You agreed that we would talk before you left and then you drop off the side of the Earth like you never existed!”

  “I wanted a fresh start,” she repeated slowly.

  “No, you wanted to run away and shove your head in the sand like a coward.”

  Direct hit to the heart, but she couldn’t let it show.

  “Why are you even here?”

  His eyes widened incredulously. “Is that a serious question? Why the fuck do you think I’m here?”

  Because he was the most loyal person in existence and she did not deserve his friendship.

  Sensing she had no retort he gestured to her face. “That new tan you’re sporting can’t hide the black circles under your eyes or the yellowing bruises on your skin, Jesus Isabelle I can barely stand to look at you.”

  “Then close your eyes or get out,” she yelled, breaking point becoming a very real option.

  Tate stared at her, his emerald eyes bearing into her very soul. “What happened to you? When did you become such a heartless bitch?”

  She was going to lose it, if he kept up this verbal assault - she was going to completely shatter apart. She wanted to give in and tell him everything so she could purge her sins and beg for his forgiveness, but she wasn’t the same girl he had grown up with and he deserved better than a cowardly, tainted version.

  “I don’t know why you came here,” she said evenly. “But it was a mistake. Go home Tate, I don’t want you here.”

  He looked over with wounded eyes. “That’s it? After everything we’ve gone through, that’s how you’re going to leave it between us?”

  “I never asked you to come,” she murmured, wrapping her arms around her chest. “But I am asking you to leave.”

  Tate inhaled with a sharp gasp.

  “Yeah, you know what? This was a mistake, you were right – I should never have bothered.”

  He strode from the room quickly, leaving Isabelle to crumble to the floor and let the tears fall freely down her face. God, what had she done? She was such a bitch. What the hell was wrong with her? Throwing away a lifetime of friendship for what? Her pride? Like there was even much of that left.

  She curled herself into a ball and cried so hard her body jerked and quivered.

  Worthless. Damaged. Pathetic.

  She deserved every bit of pain she was feeling right now.

  Two strong arms wrapped around her and she instantly recognised Tate’s scent of apples and pine.

  “Now let’s try this again. What happened?”

  She looked up in disbelief. “I thought you left me.”

  Pulling her into his arms fully and gently wiping away her tears he whispered. “Never.”

  That did it, that one act of tenderness. The sobs grew harder and harder and her whole heart shattered as she opened her mouth and told him everything.

  CHAPTER 6

  JACE

  Jace ran like he was being chased. His heart was pounding as he rushed past his bewildered Mum and slid into his room, kicking the door shut behind him. With hands shaking from adrenaline, he ripped open his curtains so he had a clear view of Isabelle’s room. He wanted to stand on his balcony and loom across like her own little watch dog but even he knew that was crossing the creepy stalker line. She obviously had a lot of history with the guy so Jace was willing to give her a bit of room, but no more th
an a bit.

  What the hell had happened between Isabelle and that guy? It certainly wasn’t the kind of reunion you’d expect to have with a best friend. He felt his chest squeeze and then harden as his mind began to whirl.

  It had something to do with that Jason douche, he just knew it. Was Tate on his side and trying to force Isabelle to come back and face him? Did he believe it was Isabelle’s fault she had been beaten so brutally?

  A surge of anger over took him and he grabbed the closest thing to him, his iPod, and threw it across the room in a rage. It took him a few moments before his breathing became almost normal again, with logic beginning to return.

  No, from the little Isabelle had told him it wasn’t likely that Tate would throw her to the wolves like that.

  He sees through me completely and I’m not ready to be that vulnerable yet.

  The pieces started to fall into place. He must not know. Isabelle must have shut Tate out after whatever had happened, forcing him to come here in a desperate bid to learn the truth. It made the most sense, but it didn’t make Jace feel any better about the guy.

  He didn’t like the way Tate had looked him over like he was a bug he was trying not to squish, and he had hated the way he’d looked at Isabelle. Maybe something had happened between the two of them, just like something had nearly happened with him and Isabelle and she’d run from it? Just the thought of her reaching out to touch that guy had Jace fuelled with rage.

  “HE DID WHAT?”

  Jace jumped at the harsh tone, rushing outside, fully prepared to jump across if necessary.

  “Calm down,” Isabelle replied with a sob. “Tate, please calm down, my parents are going to hear you.”

  “Maybe they should hear me, I can’t believe you haven’t said anything!”

  “And this is exactly why! I’m not going to have this conversation with you if you can’t keep your voice down,” she told him in a wavering voice.

  “Come out to the balcony,” Tate told her tersely.

  Shit! Jace panicked and dove behind his couch out of their eye sight, praying he didn’t get caught crouching down here like a creep. He could only hope they didn’t see his feet sticking out.