The Jealous God

by Brendan Carroll

  “What was that?” Catharine asked her quietly.

  “I don’t know,” Merry said. She blushed and wrung her hands in front of her, suddenly feeling very stupid and silly. “You would have to know Planxty. He’s really silly sometimes. I wish he were here. I’ll bet he would know where Luke is.”

  “No, really. Tell me about this vampire thing. I might know something about it,” Catharine told her. “I find the subject quite fascinating myself.”

  “Oh, well.” Merry perked up and sipped her cup of coffee. “It seems when they were having the great Council, Vallen Martin supposedly admitted he had been a member of a blood-drinking cult in Italy. The Grand Tetons or something. I don’t remember the name. It was not supposed to be discussed, but Planxty had overheard Christopher and Vallen talking about it in the library one night. Scared the bejesus out of the old man. He related the story to Gil Pairaud, and Gil tried to explain to him vampires did not go around as wolves and bats, knocking on windows and sleeping in coffins. I guess Planxty was worried a vampire would get him while he was asleep or something.”

  Catharine sat on her bed listening to this with a peculiar expression on her face. Merry’s misnomer made her heart beat very rapidly. Grand Tetons. Teutons. Teutonic. “That is truly fascinating. What did this Gil Pairaud say they were?”

  “Well,” Merry frowned and sipped her coffee again. She looked about the apse. It was truly eerie in the old church with only the candles and a small lamp to light the depths. The sun was up outside, but the overcast sky and the thick, stained-glassed windows did not allow much natural light inside, even on sunny days.

  “I’m not sure I should be talking about this with you,” Merry finished lamely. Gil had mentioned Catharine to Planxty by name. Merry had not known who Catharine was at the time. She’d heard snatches and tidbits of information, but she and Luke had had several arguments about the woman during that time. Merry had naturally wanted to know the entire story of Catharine and Simon and the Grand Master with all the details, but Luke had flatly refused to tell her much of anything.

  “He said vampires were an invention of the church… I assume he meant the Church… Rome,” she made little quotation marks in the air. “He said the bishops and the popes made up stories like that to frighten the masses into submission to the will of the Holy See. In the early days, most of the people couldn’t read or write or even speak Latin, and so, they were at the mercy of the clergy for their understanding of the religion they practiced. I never knew any of that until I met Luke Matthew. He told me all about the failings of the Church. Of course, he considers himself Catholic, though he doesn’t always agree with the Pope. He likes to talk about it; in fact, it’s one of his favorite rants.”

  Catharine nodded her head in agreement. “That is well known to be true, Meredith. I saw how the Church worked first hand. Their methods were not quite Christian. Your brother-in-law barely escaped their little Inquisition himself from what I understand. First they came after my people; and then, they turned on the Templars.” Catharine looked up at the vaulted ceiling. “God was with him.”

  “I don’t know if God was with him, but Mark Andrew seems immune to everything. I’ve read a lot about the early history of the Church, and I don’t know how Mark Andrew escaped being burned at the stake,” Merry said. “I have always liked history, and legends, and stuff and, of course, when I found myself involved with the Order, I wanted to know everything I could know, so I could understand what was happening around me. After I married Luke, I guess you could say, I wanted to understand what made him tick. It has not been easy living with him. Half the time, he wants to darn my socks for me and chew my food for me; and the other half of the time, I believe, he wants to cut off my head!” Merry laughed nervously. “Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t trade him for anyone else in the world. I love him to death.” She fell silent at the thought of what might be happening to her absent husband at that very moment.

  “This child you had...” Catharine narrowed her eyes and she looked up at the ceiling again as if something had just come to her from nowhere. “She… you lost her? She was taken from you. You did not tell me this. Someone took her.”

  Catharine looked down at her hands and frowned. Merry sat staring at her with her mouth hanging open. She had told Catharine about the baby, and how she had lost the baby during a ‘misadventure’ in the underworld. About how Mark Andrew had convinced Luke, it was hopeless to look for the baby and convinced her husband the baby girl was not his, but she had stopped short of telling her the entire story, afraid of what Luke might do if he learned of it. “An evil man… no, not a man. An Ifrit. A Djinni!” Catharine looked up at her visitor in wonder. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you. Sometimes these things just happen. I’m sorry.”

  “No, don’t be,” Merry said quietly. A feeling of calm washed over her, and she knew, she had been denying everything, though, she knew it was all true. The baby did not belong to Luke, and Mark Andrew had been trying to protect Luke by calling off the search. The Knight of Death knew his brother quite well. “It’s all right. That’s true. She did not belong to Luke Matthew. I… it wasn’t in the plans. I didn’t know. He didn’t know either. Luke is a good man. He never held it against me. He’s never held anything against me. Even the things that really were my fault.” She set her coffee cup on a small table and blinked at the woman in awe, wondering why she suddenly felt euphoric, as if she was totally safe here in this sanctuary. A place she had never liked before. A place that had formerly made her shudder with horror when she thought about coming here. Now, she almost felt as if she could have drifted up into the vaulted ceiling if she let go of the edge of the seat.

  “You are a blessed woman, Meredith. In time, you will learn many things, if you keep your mind open.”

  “I don’t feel blessed, Catharine.”

  “Please go on. Tell me more about your daughter,” Catharine urged her and took a swallow of coffee. “Would you like another cup?”

  Merry declined and waited while Catherine refilled her own cup.

  Merry began to tell her about the birth of her daughter, and how she had become desperately ill in the underworld, and unable to give birth to the child. When she told her about Lucio’s part in the delivery of the baby, Catharine sat with her hand over her mouth in disbelief. Merry continued on with the story, as if, she had only been waiting to have someone to pour it out to, as if, it had been a great burden that needed to be shared with someone… anyone who was willing to listen. She ended by telling the woman about how Luke Matthew had finally confronted his brother and learned the truth of the baby’s parentage.

  When she finished, Catharine handed her a cup of cool wine, and she drank it down.

  “That is a most remarkable journey, Meredith,” Catharine spoke in the silence after a few moments. “I am honored, you shared it with me. You have let go of a terrible burden, and now, you can put to rest your hatred for Mark Andrew. He loves you a great deal, didn’t you know?”

  Merry’s euphoria left her with almost the same speed it had arrived.

  “I see you didn’t,” Catharine nodded her head slowly and looked deep in Merry’s eyes. “There is much here I do not understand.”

  Merry squirmed in the chair like a child in the principal’s office, and Catharine searched about in her baskets for something more potent to drink. She produced a bottle of brandy and filled two plastic tumblers for them before resuming her comfortable perch on the mattress amidst the hodge-podge assortment of vari-colored and shaped pillows.

  “Mark Andrew could have had you for himself, isn’t that right?” She narrowed her eyes slightly. “But he gave you to his brother…”

  “He did not!” Merry protested indignantly. “How could he do that… I didn’t belong to him!”

  “I’m sorry.” Catharine smiled slightly. “Now I’ve upset you. I didn’t mean to insinuate anything, Meredith. At any rate, you can be at rest concerning your brother-in-law. He would n
ever do anything to hurt you, but I believe you know that.”

  Merry’s face flushed deep red as the memory of the unholy confession she had made to Mark Andrew, in this very chapel, returned to her quite clearly. It had been cold and dark then, like now, and it had been then she had discovered Mark’s true feelings for her. Catharine was reading her mind!

  Merry stood up, and Catharine caught her hand.

  “No, please, stay a while, Merry. I won’t harm you. I understand my son was married to you for a short while? I saw you in his mind. He loves you even more than Luke Matthew does. He is a gentle soul in spite of his past. I hope you do not think ill of him for his impetuosity? You must admit, it was a bold plan and cost him dearly.”

  “Yes. No! That was not me; that was Sister Meredith,” Merry told her. “You must know Sister Meredith and I are not the same person. We just look alike and share the same name. She was also married to Lucio for several years and even had twins for him. He apparently makes the rounds. You do know that, don’t you?”

  “You see? I am not what you think I am. I do not know everything; however, I do know Galen Zachary is his son.” She raised her chin somewhat in response to Merry’s haughty tone, and the remark had the desired effect. Merry dropped her head.

  “I’m sorry,” Merry muttered. “I shouldn’t have said that about him.”

  “There is no need for us to throw stones, Merry. I am quite aware of Lucio’s feelings for you. It seems you, or your counterpart, or both have won the hearts of a number of very stalwart Knights. That is a compliment, truly. In the elder days, you would have had many noble offers for your hand in marriage. You would have had your pick. A fair prize for a fair prize. We must consider ourselves sisters. I will have it no other way. Please, please sit down.” Catharine tugged on her hand, and she resumed her seat, and a small bit of the former euphoria reclaimed her.

  “Now, I will tell you something of my own journey, and the loss of my beloved son, Simon of Grenoble. If you think of it in terms of your own experience, you will see our stories are very similar. But, first, I will tell you this. Your daughter is alive and well, and only recently, she has been seen on this very island. Our fates are interwoven and inextricably part of the same matrix. You spoke with her yourself, and did not recognize her, but she knows who you are. he cameS here to see you.”

  Merry frowned and held out her glass for another round of the brandy that went to her empty stomach and made her head reel.

  “Who? Who?!” She raised her voice a bit. No one had been to the island recently. They were completely cut off from the outside world. No one was allowed in or out of the island without permission of Peter Rushkin, d’Brouchart’s Chaplain Brother, who had been left in charge when the Knights had gone to New Babylon with Omar. “I have spoken with no one! Was it a dream then? Did she appear to me in a dream?”

  “She came with Levi D’Ornan. She called herself Menaka Keshini, Celestial Damsel with golden hair,” Catharine’s voice seemed far away. “A name her father gave her when they were together in the Orient. She is a creature of light, Meredith, and does not swim in the sea of darkness and ignorance as do the children of men. She sought out the son of the Healer and made him love her in order to return to us. But if thou findest thine heart is not darkened, be sure that a force is directed to thee. Only by knowing canst thou overcome it. Only by wisdom can thou hope to be free. Knowledge brings wisdom and wisdom is power. Attain and ye shall have power o'er all.”

  “These are the words of Thoth, the Atlantean and cannot be ignored. They apply today to your daughter just as they applied centuries ago to the earlier sons and daughters of light. Your daughter is very special, Merry. You can be at ease about her.”

  “Menaka? The girl who came here with Levi?” Merry could not believe this, yet she had found the girl almost breath-taking in her charm and beauty. Everyone had been impressed by her and her ability to lift their spirits with a simple glance. “Why didn’t she tell me who she was?”

  “Perhaps, she did not think it wise at the time, and perhaps, I am wrong to tell you about it now, but as one mother to another, I can only sympathize with your pain. You deserve to know she is out there, and she can take care of herself. Not only herself, but, she will take care of my grandson as well. It is her destiny to become a part of this great plan, just as you and I are. The only thing you lack, Meredith, is knowledge. Knowledge is the key to enlightenment. Knowledge that has been hidden and locked away, in order, to preserve it for those who can appreciate it.”

  “Tell me about this knowledge, Catharine.” Merry leaned forward. Her heart was beating very rapidly. This was more than she had ever hoped to learn. Her daughter! She had seen her. She knew who she was and had come to see her! It was more than enough to know she was alive and well and aware of her own identity. Hope sprang anew into her heart. “If I am to be a part of this plan, as you call it, I should know what my role is to be. What was that you were saying earlier about the force being with me? Is that poetry? Who is Thoth?”

  “He was a great teacher, Thoth, the Beneficent Father of Khem,” Catharine said as she stood up again and took the empty cup from her. “But in order for you to receive the knowledge, you must trust me. You must cast aside things you have held long in your mind to be true. You must see the difference between the light and the dark. Are you ready to give up all you have believed in order to know the truth?”

  “I am.” Merry stood slowly and locked eyes with the woman. “But, I have heard it said Mark Andrew Ramsay was not only Merlin, the Sorcerer, but this Thoth as well. Can that be true?”

  “Many things that were once true are no longer true, and some things that were never meant to be are now truth. Men bring things into the world that should not be, and then, they do not understand what they have done. They flounder in cold seas of inky oblivion and cry out for help where none can come. I want you to go and meditate on what I have told you.”

  Catharine placed her hands on Merry’s shoulders and looked into her eyes. “I want you to reconcile yourself to your daughter’s existence as she is now, and I want you to free your mind of the confusion that rests there. I want you to look into the sky and see the earth is very small and there is much that lies beyond, which is unknown to men. You must forget the world is under your feet, and you must feel detached from it completely. You must realize all you are is within your body, and all that surrounds you is nothing, but empty shadows.”

  Merry nodded slowly, and Catharine released her. “When you have done this, come back to see me, and I will tell you what I know, then you can judge for yourself.”

  “Have you seen my husband?” Merry asked her before turning to leave.

  “I have.” Catharine followed her toward the doors. “He is living in great turmoil, but he will be home soon, and you will see for yourself, he is well. But, remember, when you do see him again, you will look at him with new eyes and see him as what he truly is.”

  “What is he?” Merry asked the question in a whisper.

  “He is a king and you will be his queen,” Catharine told her point blank. She opened one of the doors, and the wind buffeted them with sea spray.

  ((((((((((((()))))))))))))

  Mark Andrew grasped the reins of the pony and rode out into the gale force wind on the rocky shore of St. Patrick’s island. His stallion reared in protest at the onslaught of the storm and salt spray struck his face. He pulled his hood low over his head and urged the great horse onto the narrow beach with the pack horse in tow. Behind him, Luke Matthew emerged on his white horse, also leading another of the elven ponies on a short lead rope. Several more ponies followed the first with huge bundles attached to their backs and covered over with the water-proof cloaks provided by Il Dolce Mio’s people. The wind howled in their ears and made communication impossible as they climbed the treacherously narrow path to the main gate. Two castle guards stopped them at the gate and sent for the Captain and Sir Peter Rushkin. In the midst of the raging stor
m, they were greeted and led inside the walls of the fortress with much joy and relief.

  Merry was descending the outside stairs leading to the top of the keep when they emerged into the bailey. The wind threatened to sweep her off her feet as she hurried across the rain-swept ground to meet them. She already knew who it was riding the white horse though his face was obscured by the heavy, dark cloak and hood.

  “Luke!!” she cried as she drew near and slipped on the wet rocks and grass.

  “Merry!!” he answered her call and then climbed from the horse, handing the reins over to one of the guards. He rushed to her side and helped her up, hugging her tightly and then lifting her into his arms as she clung to his neck. All he could say was her name over and over again as the ponies filed past on their way to the stables.

  Mark Andrew dismounted and handed his horse over to the guards, as well, and came back to join them.

  “The keep!” Mark Andrew shouted at him above the roar of the wind, and they trudged along toward the castle as more people came out with flashlights and rain gear to meet them.

  He was completely taken aback, when Merry grabbed him in a great hug, kissing him on both wet cheeks. Luke pulled her away from Mark and wrapped part of his cloak over her soaked curls. Mark was momentarily set back by her attentions, but the rain made him quickly follow them up the road toward the keep. The last time he’d seen her, she had cursed him a blue streak and wished him dead and buried. Typical. Absence certainly made the heart grow fonder. He had to smile in spite of the terrible weather. Peter Rushkin and his guardsmen continued on past the keep toward the stables with the horses. Mark Andrew had instructed him not to touch the packs on the ponies, but to provide them shelter from the storm and give them food and water until morning. They would meet in the grand hall.