Lost Secret

by Emily Kimelman Gilvey

  "And you think of them as the zombie makers?" I asked.

  "You are immune, Darling, are you not?"

  "So are vampires," I said.

  "But only because they are already dead."

  "Whereas I'm alive."

  "According to the rhythm of your heart."

  I raised my eyebrows. "Is that what makes you alive?"

  "Vampire and zombie hearts do not beat."

  "Don't they?" I asked, thinking of Dimitri's heart. I had felt it beat along with mine.

  Tyronios cocked his head. "Have you heard one beat?"

  “When I was with Dimitri…I felt his heart beat." He turned to the books. "What about Megan? She is only half turned."

  "Half turned?" he looked up at me. "That is very rare."

  "That's what Issa said. I think she is still capable of love."

  Tyronios shook his head. "Vampires cannot love. They can obsess, but it is not the same as love." His finger scanned down a page and then he flipped through the book. "There is one reference.” He traced the words with his finger. “One world that believes Samil was a vampire. The first vampire. And that Lilith turned him into an angel. Brought him back to life. Eternal life."

  I leaned over him, but the book was in a language I didn’t recognize. Shaking my head, I stepped back. Tyronios continued to read. A pull in my gut made me startle. Megan is in trouble. How did I know that?

  “What is it?” Tyronios asked.

  "Issa has my blood," I said. "I need to go now.”

  "But you have only just arrived. Don't you want to learn about yourself?" He left the book open and stepped toward me.

  I glanced at the pile of manuscripts. "There is nothing about me in those books," I said. “That is the past.”

  Tyronios shook his head. "But, Darling, how can you say that?"

  "Every one of us is different. Maybe we all get power from sex, but we all wield it differently. If my immunity is replicable, then you will discover that in your labs, not in your library."

  “But it may be in a spell, Darling. We can work together to end this plague. You are right that these books cannot tell you about yourself, but they are your history. And history cannot be ignored—especially when it keeps repeating.”

  A crash from the hall drew our attention to the doors. Tyronios rushed past me and locked them. "That vampire has breached our borders. He must be very old.”

  "I was just leaving anyway.”

  "But what about the letter from your father? Don't you see you need us?"

  I stared down at the older man. "I needed you when I was a child," I spat at him, angry with all that could have been. If they'd found me instead of those police officers, if I'd been raised in this library instead of in the home of a monster, how different would my life have been? Then I felt the pull from Megan again and remembered that without the mistakes made, I never would have met her. And I didn't want to be without Megan, no matter what any book said about her ability to love, the location of her soul, or anything else. "Now what I need is to go and get my friend.”

  "It is so dangerous," Tyronios said. "We can train you, help develop your gifts, and then you can save her. It will be so much easier."

  I was tempted by his offer but knew that the world would not wait for me to gain strength. If I wanted to free Megan from her parent's grasp, now was the time to do it. "I have to go," I said.

  “We need you here," he pleaded. "Together we can stop this plague."

  The door to the library burst open, and Dimitri, his shirt blood-spattered and face contorted in rage, stormed in. He blurred to me, his arms wrapping around me, and we smashed into the table full of books. His hands touched me everywhere—as if making sure I was real. "Don't leave me," he said against my ear, his voice so low only I could hear.

  "I'm here," I whispered against his hair. Tyronios watched us from by the door, his eyes wide with shock. He ran to the books and flipped through pages. Dimitri kissed my neck, whispering my name. Power coursed through my veins, pulling from his lips, his wet hungry tongue.

  Tyronios read the words under his breath and then looked back up at us. "A vampire in love," he said. "Has he drunk from you?" I shook my head. "I never thought it was possible."

  I pushed lightly on Dimitri's shoulders, and he eased off of me but held his arm around my waist, keeping me close. "I want this to end as much as you. As much as any being capable of feeling compassion. It is horrible. But now I need to get to Megan. I can feel that she needs me. I will come back if I can. But first, I've got some vampires to deal with."

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Before we returned to Megan's parents’ house, I needed all the strength I could get. I didn’t know how to free Megan, but I knew that I could…somehow. That core of strength inside of me could do anything.

  We left the mansion at 67 Adam's Way—the warlocks didn’t even try to stop us. They just watched Dimitri pick me up and carry me out. He took a running leap over the high stone wall, and we landed on the quiet street. "I want a shower and a change of clothes," I told him.

  Dimitri nodded. I tried to climb out of his arms but he held me tight. “Hey.” I placed a hand on his chest, and he looked down at me. “It’s okay,” I promised.

  Dimitri licked his lips, his eyes dark in the low light. “You are so young and have seen so little.” A subtle smile pulled at his lips. “And yet you try to comfort me.” He gave his head a small shake. “You have changed me, Darling. And I don’t understand it.”

  “Me either. But I know I can walk.” I smiled at him.

  He put me down slowly, keeping a hand on my lower back. We didn't go far, only about two blocks, to where there were apartment buildings. Dimitri broke down the front door and we entered one of the ground floor spaces.

  He picked up a couch, lifting it as though it was made of cardboard, and blocked our entrance, offering a small protection from zombies—it would slow them down at least.

  Dimitri took my hand and led me through the dark.

  His energy pulsed as we entered a bathroom—I felt tile under my feet and sensed the small space as Dimitri's influence tightened around us to fit.

  He leaned forward, and I heard a shower start, the spray a welcome sound. I was filthy.

  “There is no hot water," Dimitri said. His fingers ran under my shirt, brushing my bare abdomen and pulling it over my head. He left a trail of kisses as he bent down to remove my pants and shoes. His own clothing rustled as he removed it.

  Holding my waist, Dimitri moved me closer to the spray. "I will make you warm.” Heat came off him, and power flowed over my body, heating me as the water hit.

  I leaned my head back, the blood and grime washing away. "We don't have much time," Dimitri said. "The sun will be up soon."

  "You can't be in the sun?" I asked. Dimitri reached behind me and brought a bar of soap to my belly.

  "Not for long," he answered, his lips close to my shoulder. "I must feed from you." His tongue found my pulse, bringing more heat up against my skin.

  "Where is the shampoo?" I asked. He squeezed some in my hand, and I began to wash my hair as he continued to clean my body. His strong and knowledgeable hands glided over me as if they always had—as if we'd always been together.

  Who knew what we were to each other—all I was certain of in that moment, with him so close, keeping me warm, cleaning me, was that love pulsed between us. A connection that fed me—that I'd have died without.

  Is he the man from my dream? I don't know.

  The room was pure darkness except for the glow of him…of his what? Was it a soul? The glowing cloud of Dimitri contrasted with the tight red center of me. I looked down at myself, invisible in the darkness except for the diamond of color pulsing.

  I reached up to touch his face, and he leaned down, his lips finding mine. We kissed slowly, luxuriously, as if the world was not coming apart at the seams, as if the sun was not about to rise, as if time was nothing to us.

  I took the soap fr
om him and washed his body, tracing along the smooth planes and hard angles of his beautiful form. He sucked in air when I touched between his legs. I wrapped my hand around him before dropping to my knees.

  The water sprayed down my back as I explored him with my mouth. His hands tightened in my wet hair as I sucked him in. "Darling," he whispered, the sound loud and echoing in the small bathroom. "Please," he begged. "Say you are mine."

  I released him and stood again. He picked me up, wrapping my legs around his hips. Dimitri's strong hands held me tight. "Say you are mine," he pleaded again.

  "Dimitri," I whispered, "I am mine. But you may feed from me."

  He groaned, leaning me against the wall. My arms wrapped around his neck. I kissed him deeply, feeling his energy seeping into me. "Take me now," I said.

  He entered me slowly, his energy pulsing around us, glowing brighter the deeper he went. He moved slowly, his hands on my face, my body, roaming all over me.

  "Harder," I begged, the slowness of it too much for me, burning me with its tease.

  His pace quickened, and I held on to him, my mind tumbling, releasing, gaining power. I felt his fangs against my neck and the hint of them, the promise of his bite, sent waves of pleasure through me. "Yes," I whispered—all of it felt so right. With my eyes closed against the darkness, I could still see his light and mine twined together, my center pulling from him, taking what I needed.

  His fangs sank into me in time with one of his thrusts. The pleasure was so intense I didn't even make a sound. Colors exploded around us as he drank from me, taking from me as I took from him, a circle of energy that seemed to grow stronger with every suck, each thrust, every breath.

  My heart banged, pushing blood through me, to him. Dimitri's heart thumped, then it began to beat with mine as his thrusts became more frantic, his lips tightening against me, and I felt his release as if it were my own.

  Energy exploded between us, filling the small space, expanding out of the room and then collapsing back into us, jolting his fangs from my neck, almost knocking us to the ground. But Dimitri steadied himself with one hand, keeping the other around me.

  His forehead against mine, Dimitri breathed steadily, his heart beating, my blood moving through his veins. "What is happening to me?" he asked.

  I cupped his face, letting my thumb cross his lips, feeling my own blood there. "I don't know.”

  He leaned down and licked at my neck, but there were no wounds to heal. I'd closed them on my own.

  We dressed in clean clothing Dimitri found in the apartment. Jeans and a T-shirt for me. A pair of too-large underpants. He could not find a bra to fit me. Why not take on a hive of vampires with my tits out?

  I didn't see Dimitri’s outfit until we were back out on the street in the last of the moonlight—a gray T-shirt that hugged his shoulders and a pair of worn jeans. I stared at him. His hair slicked back, skin like polished porcelain, ice blue chips of color buried in his gray eyes. He looks even better casual than in a suit.

  I could hear his heartbeat slowing…fading. How long until it stopped again?

  "Come." He looked east toward the horizon. "We must go." He picked me up, blurring through the streets, passing too quickly for any danger that would seek to harm us. I closed my eyes against the wind and leaned my face into his solid chest, feeling safe and cherished. Only my father and Megan ever made me feel so at home.

  He stopped in front of a large plantation house in need of a paint job. Three stories tall, the marble entrance featured large corniced columns. The whole thing was lit up like there was a party inside, but it was quiet. Dimitri put me down. As our feet crunched over the gravel, I stopped for a second. "What?" Dimitri asked.

  "Do they want to kill me?" I asked.

  He shook his head. "They want to turn you. To save you. They do not know you are different."

  "Are you going to tell them?" He shook his head. “Thank you.”

  Dimitri reached out and took my hand. "I like touching you too much." He gave me a rueful smile.

  "Even though I'll never be yours."

  "I have not given up on that yet." His smile faded. The vampire is determined. But so am I. "You make me...I cannot explain it, Darling. You make me feel.” He looked down at our hands. “That is something I have not done in a long time.” Dimitri brought his eyes to meet mine again. “I have existed for eight centuries, but before you, I don't think I ever lived." His words stole my breath away. He stepped closer, our bodies flush. "I won't let anyone hurt you. Ever." That sounds like a vow.

  "You are mine." I claimed him somehow, not clear what it meant, but knowing that it was true.

  His lips twitched into a smile, and he cupped my cheek, leaning in to kiss me, gently at first, but it deepened so that I wrapped one of my legs around his waist, and he gripped me as if someone was trying to tear me away. His energy poured into me. I broke away, panting. "You need your strength.” He nodded, our foreheads touching.

  We walked up the marble steps, and Dimitri opened the door. The living room was empty, but Megan appeared quickly. "You're okay? Were you bitten?”

  Her beauty struck me again: the vibrance of her red hair, her glowing skin, the fear I could see in her eyes making her even more gorgeous—desperate but definitely alive.

  "I'm fine," I said. "But, Megan—" I grabbed her hands, so cold and smooth, like the marble I was standing on. "I need to talk to you. There is so much I've learned."

  Megan bit her lip and looked over her shoulder. "There’s no time.”

  Pearl, her long blonde hair tied up into a high ponytail, exposing her long, elegant neck, floated into the room. The navy blue shirt she wore scooped across her shoulders, exposing defined collarbones. Her light blue eyes, those cold orbs, focused on Megan. "Come," she said, waving to us. "We must begin your transformation, Darling."

  “I don’t want to change,” I said. For the first time in my life.

  Pearl laughed shifting her gaze to me. “Oh good. So you want to donate? Or did you want to die?” She smiled.

  I shook my head. "I want to stay alive, for as long as I can, as a human. Just let me go. Let Megan come with me."

  Pearl's face darkened. "Who are you to give me orders?" Her voice was quiet and powerful, her influence sliding across the room to me. I let it settle over me, keeping the center of me under my own control.

  Pearl blurred across the room, her fingers digging into my biceps as she dragged me across the space. My feet stumbled, and I fell over the old carpet; the only thing keeping me upright was Pearl. She pushed me through a door and dropped me onto the floor in front of Megan's father, Brad.

  He leaned against a large wooden desk, an almost bored expression on his handsome face. The walls of the room were lined with bookshelves filled with leather-bound volumes. Behind the desk was a large window, the heavy drapes closed against the near dawn.

  To my left was a table. From my vantage point on the floor, I couldn't see what was on the surface, but three vampires stood around it—two women and one very tall man. They all had that same pale skin, accented by the sweetest pink lips and cheeks. Their blue eyes were just as cold and blue as every other vampire in the room…except Dimitri's, which now flashed with a silver gray that I put there.

  Slowly, I climbed to my feet.

  Megan's father stared, his influence bearing down on me so that I felt him under my skin. "You don't want the gift we have offered?"

  "I want to stay human."

  "Then you'll go to the camps. We have no use for a human here." He waved a hand in a take her away gesture.

  "Just let me go," I said, looking at the floor trying to seem small and harmless.

  "Please, Dad," Megan said. "Let us both go."

  His gaze left me, and I peeked up from beneath my eyelashes. He stared at the door where Megan stood, her hands pressed together like a prayer. "Please," she said again. "I'll take care of her."

  He curled his lip, disgust clear in his features. "You can't survive off o
ne human. Especially not one of your own blood."

  "I'll find others," she said.

  Pearl spoke up then. "I forbid it. I just got my daughter back. I'm not going to let you go again."

  Megan turned to look at her. "Got me back?" She laughed, a hollow, joyless sound. "You abandoned me long before you were turned."

  "You would have died if we hadn't come for you," Pearl said.

  "Maybe I'd be better off," Megan spat at her mother.

  "How dare you," Brad roared, his anger raising him off the ground—he floated on a swirling black cloud of power shot through with sparks of gold. His face contorted with rage.

  One of the vampires who'd been standing around the table, a small woman with delicate features and long chestnut hair, spoke softly. "Brad, calm down."

  Megan's father's head whipped to her. "Angelia, this is none of your concern."

  "And yet here I am hearing all of it." Angelia flapped a hand at me. "Just kill the human and let's get on with it." She turned back to the table, and the tall vampire, a man with blond shoulder-length hair, looked at me, his fangs distending. Megan blurred between us.

  "No!" she yelled. "She is of my blood."

  Angelia smiled at Megan. "I don't care.”

  One of the shelves of books seemed to explode, the paper raining down around like confetti. The white shreds appeared to move in slow motion compared to the whirl of bodies that whipped through the space. The desk cracked in half under a weight I could not see.

  Megan's body slammed into the wall next to Dimitri, and she fell to the ground, motionless. Brad stood over her limp form. He straightened his shirt and then turned back to me.

  "I will drain you myself.” He started toward me, his walk slow and predatory.

  I backed away, fear clawing at me.

  I tried to muster up my power, the ability to stop things in motion, to freeze him. No, no, no! I screamed in my head. But he continued his approach. My eyes unfocused, and I looked at the energy in the room, at the influences, the overlapping shapes. Those lines of light that pulled at Dimitri, that seemed to control him, led straight to Brad’s heart. His still, dead heart.