Promise of Forever
Page 15
That was such a big front she’d put on back there in Grandpa’s office, saying she knew what had to be done. Generally speaking, she did know, but the specifics certainly rattled around in her mind.
She had to have a talk with Mona, and that talk would happen today, but what should she say? “The game’s over, Mona. Shape up or ship out?”
That was the message, wasn’t it? What a luxury, to be that blunt.
She left the freeway at the next exit and looped around to head back toward the clinic.
Lord, I need Your wisdom…Your direction. What do I do about Mona? What is honest, real and kind? Is there a way to draw the line and show Your love?
And, Lord, what do I do about Noah? He must not think much of me if he could go behind my back, but, if he could do that, I’m not so sure I think much of him.
It wasn’t her imagination. Noah would not meet her eyes, and he hadn’t since their noon meeting with Grandpa. She missed their easy give and take, especially after the closeness they’d shared Friday night and on Saturday with Harlene and Kendra.
Even Vanessa seemed subdued, and Mona wasn’t as hateful as usual. Maybe they were all reacting to her own attitude. Certainly, it was one they hadn’t seen before.
She’d become the vigilant one. She made a point of never leaving Mona alone with a patient or parent any longer than she had to, even if it meant she had to do callbacks at less convenient times. Instead of retreating to her office when she had a break to do paperwork, she hung out in the front, watching Mona like a hawk.
By the time the last patient left for the day, Beth felt on edge and in no mood to present the gifts she’d brought in this morning. They weren’t necessary, but face-to-face talks were.
“Vanessa, would you join me in my office,” she said. “Noah and Mona, please stick around. I need to talk to each of you, too.”
Vanessa followed her down the hall, and Beth shut the door behind them to insure privacy. Vanessa looked scared to death.
Beth touched her arm reassuringly and said, “You’re not in trouble, Vanessa. Sit down for a minute. I just want this chance to say thank you.”
Vanessa collapsed in a chair. “I thought you were going to fire me.”
“Fire you?” Regret swelled in Beth’s chest. She’d done a very bad job if Vanessa thought that. “I can’t imagine what we would do without you. I brought you a little gift this morning and planned to present it, along with Noah’s and Mona’s, in a little appreciation ceremony, but this has been an unusual day.”
“Everyone has been so quiet!”
“There’s a reason. At lunch, I learned that I haven’t been doing my job.”
“What do you mean? I love the changes you’ve made, Dr. Beth.”
“Thank you, but what I’m saying is, I’ve let some things slide that created impossible stress for you and Noah. I’m not blind to that anymore.”
“Ohh, you mean Mona.”
Beth didn’t feel right talking to one employee specifically about another, but this had to be said. “Vanessa, if you see anything that doesn’t seem right, I want to know about it. You won’t get in trouble. Don’t be afraid to speak up.”
“I can tell you anything?”
Beth nodded. What else was there?
“I do have one thing…if I’m not going to get in trouble….”
“You’re not.”
“Dr. Beth, I don’t think you’ve noticed…”
Another failure?
“Noah can’t keep his eyes off you.”
What? Beth stared, stupefied. She hadn’t expected that.
“I’ve never seen Noah the way he is with you. He smiles, he jokes. I don’t think he knows it yet, but he’s crazy about you.”
“Well, yes, we’re becoming good friends,” Beth acknowledged, trying to hide how flustered—and delighted—she was.
Vanessa bit her lip to hold back a smile. “I know you have to say you’re just friends, but I see what I see. You two are going to make a great couple.”
Vanessa deserved a bigger gift than replacement candy! Beth gave her what she had and said, “Would you send Noah in, and would you stay with Mona until I send for her?”
“I sure will, and that’s a good idea about me staying. Noah and I try not to leave Mona alone.”
Beth wanted to beat her head against her desk. She had been so blind. Even Vanessa knew there was a problem while Beth lived in a bubble of Jesus’ love and goodwill. There had to be a balance between loving people and seeing that they didn’t hurt others.
Chapter Thirteen
“You wanted to see me?” Noah stood at the door, focusing somewhere over her head.
She motioned him in and closed the door. How could she talk to a man who wouldn’t even look at her? Walking to the window, she stared outside, gathering her thoughts. “Noah, I don’t know how to say this, but I am so sorry—”
He touched her arm. “You’re sorry?”
She caught her breath at his touch and turned to see the remorse in his eyes.
“I’m the one who’s sorry,” he said. “Beth, you don’t have anything to be sorry about.”
“But I was so angry in Grandpa’s office.”
“And you had a right to be! You walked into a bad situation here that neither Keith nor your grandfather expected. When Mona stayed on, and it looked like things could get rough, what could they do? They’re men of integrity, Beth. You know that. No one meant to belittle you or disrespect you. The intention was to get Mona out of here without involving you in a problem you didn’t create.”
His loyalty to Grandpa was worthy of respect. “I think I understand all that now, and I appreciate what you’ve done…though I still regret that you had to do it.”
He rubbed the back of his neck as if tension had built up there. “When the chief brought me into the situation, I wasn’t sure I could spy on someone. Then I saw how Mona treated you and how nice you were in return, and I not only wanted to help, I was honored to help.”
“Really?” Wisps of happiness rose in Beth’s heart, and she wished they were the couple that Vanessa had predicted. She could use a hug after the day they’d had.
“Beth, you’ve come in here and swept us off our feet with your kindness. This last weekend, I had more fun than I’ve had in ages. Kendi is crazy about you. All she can talk about is the Mother-Daughter Tea. Harlene thinks you’re wonderful. Vanessa thinks you’re the greatest, and I L-O-V-E, love working for you.”
Kendra’s phrase made her smile—as he intended, but the sincerity of his comforting words brought back that trouble with her knees. She reached out to him, just for support, but he took her in his arms and held her, his chin against her forehead…for a second, maybe two.
For him, it was probably just a reassuring, supportive, I’m-here-for-you hug. She shouldn’t read more into it than that, but she looked up and found him gazing at her with strong emotion that was neither reassurance nor support.
That look took her breath and made her knee problem much worse. It was a good thing he was there to hold on to. His eyes drifted to her mouth, and she’d never wanted a kiss more in her life.
“Beth,” he whispered.
She loved the way he said her name.
“Mona’s waiting.”
Talk about a splash of cold water! Beth stepped out of his arms and wondered how she was supposed to keep things professional when her senses were reeling?
She had to see Mona, but first she would give Noah his present. That would make a nice transition from irrational romance to office reality.
“What’s this?” he said, peering through the plastic wrapper. “A kite?”
She pointed to the picture on the package. “It’s a promise rainbow…for you and Kendra.”
He looked at her as if she’d done something wonderful, which made her feel that she had. When he reached for her, she tipped her head up for the kiss she longed for.
But he cupped her head in his big hand and pulled her close
for a kiss on her forehead—not exactly the location she’d had in mind.
“I’ll be close by while you’re talking to Mona,” he said, moving toward the door. “You’re not alone.”
“Thank you,” she said, sitting in her big leather desk chair. When she talked to Mona, she needed every inch of authority and professionalism she could muster. The lollipops in her chest pocket should go in the drawer.
Mona sashayed into the office as though she owned the place, and she probably felt as if she did, as long as she’d worked here. “It looks like you’re passing out presents,” she said with a smirk.
That smirk sent oceans of courage zipping through Beth’s veins.
“I hope it’s not those flowers,” Mona said, holding her nose. “You know how allergic I am.”
“You won’t be here long enough for your allergy to kick in. Please, have a seat.”
Mona checked her watch. “I don’t have time to chat. You seem to have forgotten I have seniority here. You shouldn’t have made me wait.”
Beth was in no mood to have Mona standing over her in the power position. “Have a seat, Mona, unless you plan for this to be your last day.”
Mona rolled her eyes and made a sound of amused disgust, but she sat.
“Mona, I know you can be a loyal professional. You were a credit to Keith. However, in the last two weeks, you have been neither loyal nor professional working with me.”
“I beg your pardon!” Mona said with fire in her eyes.
“Actually, that’s quite appropriate. You should beg my pardon. You’ve done things that warrant an apology. Fortunately for you, I’m willing to give you another chance. Singular. One chance. Take it or leave it. Be the kind of nurse I know you can be…or you won’t be working here anymore. Do you understand?”
Outraged, Mona blinked once, which might have meant yes, but she sashayed out with the same arrogant confidence with which she’d come in.
Beth reached for Mona’s very expensive, gourmet chocolate truffles, broke the seal on the box, chose one of the tempting treats and bit in. Creamy, rich chocolate melted in her mouth. Poor Mona. She didn’t know what she was missing.
Noah came back, a worried frown on his face. “Didn’t you talk to Mona?”
“I gave her an ultimatum and one more chance, as I said I would do.”
“She walked out of here as if she’d won the round. Are you okay?”
Beth shrugged. “I’m not okay enough to let Mona have these.” She held the box of candy out, inviting him to share Mona’s present.
He perched on the edge of her desk and popped a truffle in his mouth. His eyes widened with pleasure. “Whoa! These are really good.”
“Take two.” She shoved the box his way.
“Mona doesn’t know what she’s missing.”
“My thought exactly! But I don’t think she cares. She has an agenda, Noah, and she’s not going to come around. I really did want to show her God’s love.”
“I think you have.”
“It hasn’t seemed to make any difference.”
“That’s hard to measure. Other people have seen how you live. It may have made a difference to them.”
Little Bethie showed her true colors today, but it had only been a matter of time. With all of her talk about God, she was as bad as the rest of the Brennans—even that fool, Trey, who she’d played like a fish, baiting him with her “concern” about his sister’s competence.
Beth’s ridiculous ultimatum might make it more difficult to do what had to be done, but the Brennans could not rip Keith out of her life the way they’d taken his picture from the staff photo gallery. He was in her heart to stay.
She needed to talk to her beloved so badly, she sometimes thought she would die. They hadn’t been apart this long since their love was new. How lonely Keith must be without her.
Tonight he would surely be back from his fishing trip, and she would catch a glimpse of him. She lived for the moments when she saw him at the kitchen-sink window or relaxing in his living room on her daily drive-by. That he seldom closed the drapes or pulled the shades was a clear signal of how much he needed their love to live on.
She turned her car onto Keith’s street and felt excitement rise in her chest. This was the best part of her day. Keith was waiting for her, longing for her, hoping to see her. Today, he might stop her and admit what they both knew. He couldn’t live without her.
There it was—his home—with the low-slung roof line and the sleek architectural design. What was that in the yard? A For Sale sign? That was brand-new! It hadn’t been there yesterday. And the house looked deserted.
Panic sent her heart racing. She could manage if Keith wasn’t at home, but if he didn’t live here at all, what would she do?
She would rise to the occasion. That’s what! She was not a woman who crumbled at life’s little adversities. Love made her strong…and resourceful.
She would call the phone number on the sign and make an appointment with the real estate agent. If that didn’t provide the information she needed, she would dip into her savings and hire a private investigator. She would find Keith, no matter where the Brennans had hidden him away.
On Thursday evening, Beth and Kendra ordered chicken strips and French fries in the mall food court. While they waited, Beth asked, “Kendra, have you ever prayed before you go shopping?”
Kendra looked startled. “Are we supposed to?”
Beth smiled. Kendra did love to play by the rules, like a true only child. “Some people wait to pray until they have something really big to ask God about.”
“Yep. Like bunions,” Kendra said, nodding wisely. “Harlene says, ‘God, heal my bunions.’”
“And that’s good! But God says we’re supposed to ask for help for everything, even finding the right dress.”
When Kendra prayed for their food, she included her shopping need, too. Beth smiled to herself, wondering what Kendra would add to her prayer list the next time she prayed in Noah’s presence.
They finished eating, and Kendra put her hand in Beth’s as they walked down the mall corridor. Beth loved the feel of that little hand.
At the upscale department store where Beth’s mother used to bring her when she was little, they walked by the cosmetic counter. A sales rep surprised Kendra with the offer of a squirt of designer perfume. Near the escalator, a musician in evening dress played classics on a grand piano.
“Where are the shopping carts?” Kendra looked around. “Aren’t we supposed to have a cart? I can push it.”
“Do you and Daddy shop in places where they have everything—like food, clothes, tools, shampoo—”
Kendra nodded. “And toys. I look at the toys.”
“I’m afraid this store just has clothes, and no shopping carts.”
Like a good girl, Kendra tried to hide her low opinion of such an inferior store. They boarded the escalator, and she said, “It would be hard to take a cart up these stairs.”
Who wouldn’t love this smart little girl? Beth led the way to the girls’ department and looked for a rack of party dresses. Kendra let go of Beth’s hand and moved quickly through the department.
In a flash, she was back, her face sorrowful. “No yellow,” she reported as if it were a tragedy.
Beth held a pink dress in one hand and a lavender one in the other. “You would look beautiful in these.”
Kendra looked doubtful.
“Why don’t we try another store?” They had a couple of hours before Kendra would get sleepy.
The second upscale department store in the mall was just as disappointing in their failure to stock the color of choice, but a charming children’s boutique had three yellow dresses in Kendra’s size! She tried on her favorite and looked into the mirror with awe.
“You look beautiful, Kendra. Do you like this one?”
“I think I look like a princess,” the child said shyly.
Beth knelt beside her and looked into the mirror, too. “Do you feel like
a princess?”
Kendra nodded her head.
“Then this is your dress.”
Kendra leaned against Beth and tears welled in her eyes. “I wish you were my mommy.”
Beth took the little girl in her arms and stroked her hair, swamped by a fierce rush of love. Where were the words to answer this child’s longing? Was there anything she could say other than promise to make this little girl’s wish come true?
That wasn’t a promise Beth could make. If there were words, they had to be spoken in a prayer for God’s will, not theirs. God might have Kendra’s mommy waiting in the wings, though Beth was right here, volunteering for the role.
Lord, you know I love Kendra. If you have another plan for her, for me, help us understand. Talk to Noah, Lord. Help him to see the possibilities.
When Noah thought about it, it was the Mother-Daughter Tea invitation two weeks ago that had turned his life upside-down. Or maybe it was that whole weekend. That’s when Beth had gone to pizza night for the first time, and the next day, she’d won Harlene’s heart. By the middle of the next week, when Beth and Kendi went shopping for the new yellow dress—and brought back a pink one, too—his and Kendi’s old routine was done for. If Beth wasn’t along, his sweet little daughter turned into a grouch.
It didn’t help that Beth seemed to have very little social life beyond the one she had with them. She ate mac and cheese at their house; they swam in her pool; Friday-night pizza at Sluggers and Tuesday-night tacos at Adolph’s were set dates.
Kendi was so in love with Beth that anyone could see it, and Beth returned her love. It almost hurt to watch them together, they were so much alike.
This evening they were going to the beach, their second trip in two weeks. Although the ocean was less than an hour away, he’d rarely gone since he met Merrilee. She hadn’t been a sand-between-your-toes kind of woman and his single-dad weekends had been too full of chores for him to take Kendi.