Reach for a Star

by Kathryn Freeman

  Taking a sip of her wine she smiled, hoping to break the tension that had been lingering ever since he’d mentioned Georgina’s name. ‘I can’t see the prawn toast.’

  But instead of smiling back, he frowned. ‘Sorry, I can order some if you like.’

  Damn, damn, damn. He was back to being formal again. ‘No, it’s fine. I’m sure these will be delicious.’

  What a shame that she’d just lost her appetite.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Michael knew he’d ruined the mood but he couldn’t stop thinking about Jessie’s reaction when he’d mentioned Georgina’s name. Part of him was flattered she’d appeared to be jealous, but he was also irritated at her assumption that because he was famous he automatically slept around. It spoke volumes about her opinion of his morals, but it also suggested she didn’t realise how heavily his feelings were already invested in her. Was that because she didn’t feel the same? Had she only come here for a brief thrill; a chance to escape the kids for a weekend?

  He’d seen how upset she’d been at the studio when she spoke about her sons, though. He didn’t imagine she’d left them lightly.

  All this was going round in his head while they ate. This was his favourite restaurant in Rome, which was why he’d asked Georgina to book it, but right now he might as well be eating McDonald’s for all the pleasure he was getting out of it.

  ‘You seem pensive.’ Jessie reached out to touch his hand. ‘Are you okay?’

  And now he was ruining it for her, too. ‘Yes. Sorry, I’m fine.’ A few more awkward minutes went by and Michael sighed, putting down his chopsticks. ‘Actually, no, I’m not okay. I’m still stuck on that conversation we had about Georgina.’

  He saw the unease enter her eyes. ‘Oh?’

  ‘Not her specifically, but what’s happening between us. I know this is bad timing, and in hindsight maybe it was wrong to invite you here.’ Her face fell and he cursed inwardly. ‘No, no. I don’t mean I regret asking you. Just that I’ve made things complicated, for both of us. You see the thing is, I want…’ He hesitated, finding his nerve. ‘I want to go out with you, Jessie. I want to date you.’

  Her eyes flew up to his. ‘You do?’

  ‘I do.’ He tried to read her thoughts, but all he could read was shock. ‘And I was hoping you felt the same way. But I’m also only beginning this damn tour and I still have seven months left. You have children and a job that you can’t easily leave. I’m wondering if I’ve been unfair on both of us, starting something. I was only half joking when I said you should tour with me. Relationships are hard enough to sustain when you’re both in the same country.’ And didn’t he know that, to his cost.

  He had a flashback to that day Paula told him she wasn’t going to marry him. She’d found someone else.

  Was he totally mad, wanting to dive into another relationship?

  His gaze travelled back to Jessie. The frozen look on her face had worn off and she was smiling at him, her gorgeous eyes swimming with tears she was trying to bat away with her hand. ‘I do feel the same way. And I don’t care how difficult it might be. I want to spend more time with you.’

  Slowly the knots in his stomach started to unravel and he began to wish they weren’t in a public restaurant so he could kiss the tears off her cheeks. Then kiss her, everywhere. The soft curve of her stomach, the mole under her left breast.

  His thoughts must have reflected in his expression because she blushed.

  Attempting to rein himself in, he dug his chopstick back into the spicy noodles that had been making him queasy only a moment ago. ‘I’m glad we had this conversation. Maybe now I can enjoy the food.’

  She laughed. ‘Me too. Though I am still wondering why we’re eating Chinese in Rome.’

  When she’d mentioned prawn toast earlier, his brain had been too fogged to realise she was teasing him. This time he recognised it. ‘I can admit that’s entirely my fault. I’m a huge fan of Chinese food. I eat it wherever I am in the world. And this place is one of my favourites.’

  ‘You’ve been here before?’

  She looked surprised, and he thought he knew why. ‘Yes, I have. Many times. And no, Georgina didn’t recommend it. She booked it, but I chose it.’

  She gave him a guilty look. ‘Oops.’

  He burst out laughing. ‘I realised, after the last place I took you, that you weren’t a fan of her restaurant choices. You’re like Robert. You prefer casual, don’t you?’

  ‘I eat out to relax and enjoy food I haven’t had to make myself. I can’t do that if I have to concentrate on deciphering the menu or choosing the appropriate wine rather than the wine I want.’

  ‘I hear you, but we might need to agree a compromise. The advantage of expensive restaurants is nobody bats an eyelid when they see someone they recognise.’

  Understanding dawned in her eyes. ‘I hadn’t considered that part.’

  ‘Don’t get me wrong. I’m not like Justin Bieber. I don’t get crazed fans tearing off my clothes wherever I go.’

  ‘But you do get recognised.’

  ‘Yes.’ Because she’d started to chew her lip, Michael decided it was time to get the other worry he had off his chest. ‘Is that going to be a problem for you? Being seen with me? I noticed how uncomfortable you were after our meal out in London.’

  ‘It took me by surprise. It’s not happened to me before.’ Her eyes skimmed past his and onto the wall behind him. ‘Since the show I’m recognised a bit in the village, and local reporters were interested for a while, but there’s been nothing like that time outside the hotel with all of those paparazzi. It unnerved me.’ Finally she brought her gaze back to his and smiled. ‘But I’m not going to let it scare me off.’

  Though he wasn’t sure he believed her, Michael was determined not to ruin this evening for a second time so he kept quiet. He would enjoy finishing his meal with this breath of fresh air that had brightened up his life.

  Then he would enjoy spending the night making love to her.

  They spent Saturday sightseeing. Michael had donned jeans and a navy polo shirt, totally taking Jessie by surprise – her first glimpse of casual Michael. If anything, he looked even more attractive. Less austere and more approachable.

  ‘What?’ he’d said when she’d stared at him as she’d come out of the bathroom to find him dressed.

  ‘I didn’t think you did casual.’

  He’d shrugged. ‘Don’t tell Robert, but I bought a few pairs of jeans in the US. I figured it was about time I tried.’

  Then he’d pulled a light wool tailored jacket out of the wardrobe and she’d burst out laughing.

  He’d simply raised an eyebrow. ‘I didn’t say I was going to change overnight.’

  It had been on the tip of her tongue to tell him she didn’t want him to change, but she’d shied away from saying it. His admission last night that he wanted more than a fling had been almost too much to hear because now, in those quiet moments when she dropped her guard, she could almost imagine a future for them.

  And that was terrifying. There was a huge leap between dating, and sharing a house with roses and a white picket fence. A huge leap, and a massive potential for heartbreak.

  To protect herself as much as she could, she had to keep back some of her feelings.

  As he held her hand through the quieter backstreets around the Trevi Fountain, she was reminded of the other reason she had to be careful. Michael had donned a baseball cap and dark sunglasses but she was aware of people giving them furtive glances.

  Fame came at a price. She could only hope it wasn’t too high for her. The small dose of media attention she’d experienced following the show had been uncomfortable. Despite her bravado to Michael yesterday, she wasn’t in a hurry to find herself in the spotlight again. Once in a lifetime was enough.

  ‘I guess Rome is somewhere you’ve performed a lot,’ she asked, determined to distract herself from such depressing thoughts.

  ‘A fair bit, yes. When in Rome, you need to
take the pace right down, and enjoy drinking in the atmosphere. Here’s just the place to do that,’ he said, pointing to a quiet café in a small square.

  They sat outside, and he ordered their drinks in fluent Italian. ‘One of the benefits of having to sing in Italian,’ he said with a shrug when she gaped at him.

  After they’d been served their coffee, Michael glanced over at her. ‘I hope it won’t be long before you come and see me again.’ His eyes held hers. ‘You will come again, won’t you?’

  The vulnerability she saw in his blue gaze made her heart ache. ‘Try and stop me.’ Before she could question the advisability of it, she asked, ‘When were you thinking?’

  ‘I’ll have to check the schedule, but I think in a few weeks there might be a free weekend in Frankfurt.’ He smiled at her raised eyebrows. ‘Perhaps not the romance of Rome, but I’m sure we can create our own.’

  He gave her a smouldering look before his eyes darted down to her mouth. Jessie’s pulse started to race and she gulped down her next mouthful of coffee.

  Before she knew it, Michael was drawing some notes out of his wallet and placing them on the table. ‘Come on.’ He reached for her hand and drew her onto her feet. Then he wrapped his arms around her, drawing her tight against him. ‘There’s another ceiling I want you to look at, and this one isn’t painted by Michelangelo.’

  On Sunday morning Jessie woke before Michael, her mind unable to rest. Part of her was delighted to be going back to Jack and Luke. The other part was dreading saying goodbye to the man breathing gently by her side. Unable to resist, she gently traced her fingers across the planes of his face, the square jaw, and down to lips that gave her so much pleasure.

  He groaned and shifted, moving his arm so it fell across her. She ran her hands over the dark hairs of his forearm before wriggling further down the bed and trailing them over the finely muscled contours of his chest, then down to the sexy trail of black hair that snaked from his navel down to his groin. A series of small round scars were the only blemish on his otherwise perfect chest. She wondered how he’d got them.

  Burning with a need to taste instead of touch, she kissed the scars, then ran her tongue upwards, licking at his flat, brown nipple. He inhaled sharply but when she looked up his eyes were still closed. With a playful sigh, she moved away and lay on her back.

  His arm shot out, tugging her head back to his chest. ‘Oh no you don’t. You need to finish what you started.’

  Laughing, she kissed him. ‘I thought you were asleep.’

  He lifted her head and gave her a heated gaze. ‘With you touching me, never.’

  It was a long while later, when she was lying replete against him, that her attention was drawn again to the scars on his chest. Her fingers ran across the rough edges.

  ‘Where did you get these?’

  He peered down to where she was exploring. ‘They’re from a snake bite,’ he replied lightly, trapping her hand and bringing it to his lips.

  ‘They don’t look like snake bites.’

  ‘I didn’t realise village pharmacists were experts on them.’

  Though his tone was still mild she could feel the tension creep into his body. ‘We’re not. But we’re also not stupid.’ Instantly his guard dropped and he looked away, his jaw tightened. It scared her. ‘What happened? Is it what I think it is?’

  ‘That would rather depend what you’re thinking.’

  It was beyond clear he didn’t want to talk about this, but Jessie had come too far. Though she felt sick at what she was about to say, she clasped his face and looked him straight in the eye. ‘I think it looks like someone stubbed their cigarette out on you.’

  Immediately he jerked away from her, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. She was faced with the broad expanse of his naked back.

  ‘Did they?’ she whispered.

  He let out a sharp breath. ‘I sung opera at school, Jessie. What do you expect?’

  Her heart lurched painfully, and suddenly his quirks started to make sense. At school he’d been the oddball, the outsider. No wonder part of him still found it hard to mix. ‘Oh, Michael,’ she whispered, dropping soft kisses across his back.

  He sat rigidly still for a moment before letting out a deep sigh and shifting to face her. ‘I don’t want you pitying me. I wasn’t an abused child. My parents had me late in life and were old-fashioned and set in their ways, which no doubt accounts for my love of classical music, but they loved me. And my singing might have seemed weird to a bunch of schoolboys from a poor estate, but it made me happy.’ He shrugged. ‘You know, really I should thank them. In making me angry, they also made me determined to succeed.’

  Her heart aching for him, she reached up and kissed him. ‘Well, you certainly showed them.’

  Her bags were packed and she was waiting for Robert. He’d arrived in Rome early that morning and kindly offered to take her to the airport in his hire car.

  ‘Are you all set?’ Michael came out from the bathroom tugging on a white T-shirt, his dark hair still wet from the shower and his newly acquired jeans hanging loose on his hips.

  Her heart sighed. ‘I guess so.’

  ‘Are you sure I can’t come with you to the airport?’

  ‘No. You need to get ready for your performance tonight.’ And how could saying goodbye to him at the airport possibly be any easier?

  Robert knocked on the door and took her bags, while Michael took her hand and walked slowly down to the car with her. As Robert climbed into the driver’s seat, Michael took her in his arms. ‘I’ll let you know about Frankfurt once I’ve checked with Georgina.’ He gave her one final, exquisite kiss. ‘Until the next time.’

  She slipped into the passenger seat and waved sadly back at him until the car disappeared round the corner. Then she began to cry.

  ‘Hey, I don’t allow women to cry in my car. Makes me look like a bastard.’

  ‘Sorry.’ She caught her breath on a sob. ‘I’m stopping now.’

  He glanced over at her. ‘I’m worried about you two.’

  Jessie blinked in surprise. ‘Why?’

  ‘I think you’re in danger of falling in love with each other, and it’s not going to be an easy ride.’

  She let out a strangled sounding laugh. ‘Michael isn’t in danger of falling in love with me.’

  Robert pulled up at the traffic lights and gave her a searching look. ‘You’re wrong. I’ve never seen him like this before.’

  As she didn’t know what on earth she could say to that, she kept quiet.

  It was a few minutes before Robert spoke again. ‘Just don’t break his heart. He might look tough, but inside he’s a softie. He usually puts up a protective barrier, but with you, I can see his defences are down.’ Obviously sensing he’d been serious for long enough, Robert smiled. ‘And don’t think I didn’t notice those jeans he was wearing. He’s never worn jeans except around the house, so you must be loosening him up. You two looked so serious back there I kept quiet, but I’ll bust his balls when I get back.’

  Grateful for the lighter comments she laughed, but her mind was an impossible muddle of emotion. Was Robert right, and she was falling in love? Was Michael? And if so, was it mad to think that when this ran its course, they could still part as friends, with neither of them getting hurt?

  Many weary hours later, she arrived home.

  ‘Mum!’ Luke, already in his pyjamas, screeched as he caught sight of her putting down her bag. His arms wrapped around her and as she breathed in his familiar smell, her heart lifted and filled.

  ‘Oh, my darling, I’ve missed you,’ she told him, hugging him back, fighting to control her tears.

  ‘We went to the zoo with Dad and Annabel today,’ Luke babbled. ‘You missed the monkeys, they were so funny. They looked just like Jack.’

  Jack snorted, but when she reached to kiss him, he didn’t turn away like he often did in that nearly-a-teenage-boy way.

  Phil was in the lounge, his feet up on the coffee table, h
is eyes glued to a rerun of Top Gear. ‘The wanderer returns.’ He flicked her a glance. ‘How was Rome?’

  She fought the urge to tell him to take his feet off the table. He was a guest now, and he’d just done her a huge favour. ‘Good, thank you. How have the boys been?’

  Finally he dragged his eyes off the television. ‘Honestly? They missed you, especially at night when I was putting them to bed. How regular is this globetrotting going to be?’

  Guilt squirmed through her, nipping away at her insides. ‘He’s asked me to go to Frankfurt in a few weeks.’

  Phil slowly lifted his feet off the table and stood up. ‘So, this thing with him is serious?’

  She bit into her cheek, determined not to break down. Now wasn’t the time. ‘I don’t know. How about you and Annabel?’

  He flushed, confirming her suspicions. ‘Let’s just say we’re having fun. And for the record I’m willing to help out with the boys whenever you fly off to see Michael.’

  ‘So you can play happy families again with Annabel?’

  He smirked. ‘Good turns deserve their own reward, don’t you think?’

  Relieved to be laughing instead of crying, Jessie swiped him round the head with a cushion.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Michael looked again at his diary and swore. Since saying goodbye to Jessie four days ago, his mood had sunk, big time.

  Finding out that Frankfurt wasn’t an option to see her, had it plummeting still further.

  Bloody German city. Bloody tour schedule. Bloody tour.

  Robert, sitting at the desk in Michael’s hotel suite going through some paperwork, tutted. ‘Whatever it is you’re going to moan about, suck it up. There are starving children out there.’

  At the truth of his words, Michael scowled even more. ‘You might be right, but remember I pay you to listen to my gripes.’

  Robert, the bastard, only laughed. ‘No way does the amount you pay me compensate for listening to you belly ache.’

  Michael massaged his temples. He felt totally and utterly fed up. A long, deep sigh escaped him before he had a chance to stop it.