by Eric Vall
Blagdan nodded slowly, and his red orbs turned upward with sadness.
“Godspeed, my queen,” he sighed, and then looked over at me with narrowed eyes. “Take care of her, King Ralston. If this doesn’t work, the Shining Alliance as we know it may be dead.”
No pressure.
“I will,” I reassured the Shadow Man. “Good luck. We’ll be watching you from above.”
“Snuff out the darkness,” Blagdan whispered to his queen.
“Snuff out the darkness,” Zilla returned, “now go, my friend. Destiny awaits.”
“Uh, bye, Jakey,” Todd faltered, “I’m totally not doing the bromance speech with you, just FYI.”
“I figured,” I laughed. “We’ll see you guys in a bit, once this is all over.”
I watched as Invidia, Ira, Todd, Blagdan, Tris, and Eclipse floated off toward the crowd entering the Playhouse.
Once they were safely integrated into the rest of the Shadow People, I turned back to the rest of the squad.
“Well, guys,” I sighed, “it’s now or never. Who’s ready to go airborne?”
Chapter 11
This was about as simple of a plan as there could be.
Deja, Inpulsa, Zilla, and I would watch from above while the rest of the team caused a major scene in the Playhouse. Once the Shadow King and his guards fled out the back of the building, we would swoop down and take them all out once and for all. With Deja’s foresight abilities, and my toxin-covered sword, it would only take one hit to kill this fucker.
What could possibly go wrong?
Knowing how most of our adventures went, I ventured the answer was “a lot,” but I wasn’t going to worry about that right now.
Now, it was showtime.
Still clad in our ridiculous black tablecloths, the four of us snuck back around the building and into the alleyway where we planned to do the deed.
“Finally, we can take these things off,” Deja made a joking gagging sound as she pulled off the cloth and tossed it onto the ground, “Pacsun’s always been more my style, anyway.”
The rest of us tossed off the tablecloths, and then the two succubi both summoned their massive, bat-like wings. They both floated up into the air, but then they looked down at us with confusion on their faces.
I threw my hands out to the side in an attempt to communicate, but it took Inpulsa and Deja a moment to figure out what I was trying to say.
“I always forget you don’t have wings,” Inpulsa mused.
“No wings?” Zilla gasped. “I thought all Demon Kings had wings?”
“I’ve got horns sometimes,” I shrugged, “but no wings. And that can’t be true. There’s not a pair of wings in the world that would be big enough to carry Mammon around.”
“What about you, Zilla?” Deja questioned. “Don’t you have like, creepy levitating powers you can use to get up here or something?”
“You think my powers are creepy?” Zilla cooed.
“Just a little,” the Valley-girl succubus shrugged from above, “I mean, no offense, but you are basically a disembodied figure made up of shadows or black fog or … whatever it is you’re made out of. Plus the glowing red eyes and fangs. I mean, I totally like you and all, but you can look a little intimidating. That’s all.”
A devilish, toothy grin spread across the Shadow Queen’s amorphous face.
“Good,” she mused, “but unfortunately no, I do not have flying abilities. I will require some assistance.”
Deja floated down, picked up Zilla in her arms like a new bride, and took off toward the sky.
“Taxi?” I joked at Inpulsa, but she just crossed her arms.
“Taxi?” she grumbled. “Because of the hair? You’re too young for Dad jokes, Jacob.”
“I gotta work with what you give me,” I shrugged, “so far, that’s mostly been your traits and the great sex. And I will never, ever poke fun at great sex.”
“Har, har,” the succubus sighed as she swooped down and wrapped her arms underneath my armpits, “maybe you should be in there trying to entertain Tenebris.”
Inpulsa gave a heave, and then we were both airborne.
It was strange. Here in the Shadow World, there wasn’t any sort of wind. I was used to the brisk, cool wind brushing past my face whenever I flew with the succubi. Even in Hell, there was still wind, it was just a lot hotter and a bit more sulfury, but here, nada.
We rose up above the edge of the Playhouse roof, and Inpulsa instantly let me go. My metal boots landed on the angular wooden roof with a loud thud, and my entire body went rigid.
“Relax, King Ralston,” Zilla reassured me, “by now, the entire audience will be inside. They’ll be making so much ruckus, they wouldn’t even be able to hear a Rapha Beast thundering around up here.”
“I wanna know how Cupi and Liby do it,” Inpulsa panted, “that armor is way heavier than it looks.”
“I guess we’re just used to touching Jacob’s body when it’s a little less clothed,” Deja giggled.
My heart fluttered as my trousers became just a tad bit tighter at the memories of these two women. I glanced over at Zilla, saw she was completely stone-faced, and then awkwardly cleared my throat to try and get back on track.
“What?” Zilla said as she quirked her head. “You don’t need to feel ashamed for sleeping with your underlings. You’re a Demon King … that’s practically a requirement for royalty.”
“Even you?” Deja questioned.
“The Caliginis are asexual,” Zilla shrugged, “we can’t breed, so we don’t see the need to fornicate like you demons and humans do. But that’s neither here nor there. The court should be starting here shortly, and we need to get into position.”
As the four of us moved in closer to the edge of the hole in the center of the roof, I could see what Zilla was talking about. The chatter of the crowd inside was so intense that it vibrated the roof underneath our feet and droned so loud it was hard to even think.
Down in the Playhouse below, there was row after row of wooden pews like those you’d find in a church. Each one was packed with the lanky bodies of the Shadow People, and their long arms were splayed out comically in front of themselves. Some of the Caliginis rested their appendages on the backs of the pews in front of them, while others let them hang down to the side, where they dangled down and touched the floor.
Seeing the dark, trunk-like arms rested against the floor while their abnormally short legs jutted up into the air like a baby’s was enough to make me chuckle.
Meanwhile, at the far end of the Playhouse sat a long, rectangular table with seven seats. In the dead-center of the table sat a shadowy chair with a winged back, and it stood nearly two feet above the rest. Just to add to the self-righteousness of the situation, the top of the chair back was shaped to look like a three-pointed crown.
That must have been where Tenebris sat.
“Do you see the ground team?” Inpulsa questioned. “Because all I’m seeing is a sea of black and red.”
“Damn,” I whistled as I scanned the crowd, “maybe those disguises worked way better than I thought they would.”
“Or Tenebris’ men already caught them,” Zilla suggested, “if that’s the case, our mission is lost before it can even begin.”
“They didn’t catch my people,” I shot back, “even if they tried to take them in, they wouldn’t go down without a fight. We’d have heard the commotion.”
“King Ralston,” Zilla protested, “no offense, but I’m the Queen of the Caliginis. I’ve interacted with my subjects for several millennia. We’ve fought together, dined together, celebrated together … I know what my people look like, and I could see through those disguises a mile away. Our team isn’t in there, plain and simple. I think we maybe should--”
“There they are!” Deja celebrated as she pointed down into the crowd. “See that one who’s waving at us? That’s totally Todd!”
I squinted my eyes and looked in the direction of the succubus’ motion. Sure en
ough, about three rows away from the stage sat a Shadow Person who was smaller than everyone else around him, and a tiny, red, clawed hand jutted out from underneath the disguise and waved up at us frantically. Right next to him were four more figures who were all making “stop it” motions.
Yup, that was Todd and the succubi, alright.
I assumed Blagdan was sitting next to the group, too, but I realized I couldn’t differentiate him from the rest of the Shadow People in the crowd.
I waved to acknowledge Todd, but then did a “cut it out” signal.
The imp’s hand gave me an “okay” gesture before it slid back underneath his tablecloth like a sunburnt snake.
“Do you think they’ll be able to create a good enough distraction?” Zilla asked as she stared down into the crowd.
“Are you kidding?” I laughed. “Todd could distract a stone statue. Throw in Invidia’s ‘I hate people’ attitude, Eclipse’s sassiness, and Ira’s quirky kinks, and I think we might just gain the attention of the entire Shadow World.”
“Let’s hope so,” the Shadow Queen sighed.
Suddenly, the jabbering below went silent. Then the white noise that characterized the Shadow World was the only thing we could hear as we watched seven of the armored Caliginis guards make their way out of a door just to the right of the table.
“I thought you said there were only two entrances?” I whispered.
“There are,” Zilla confirmed, “Tenebris likes to get here before everyone else, sit around backstage, and then make his grand entrance in front of all of his people. He’s pompous like that.”
“Yeah,” I snorted, “the crown-chair kinda told me as much.”
The seventh and final guard exited the door, walked over to the closest empty seat, and stood behind it like the rest of his brethren. Then all of the guards turned back to the entryway and held up their arms in a salute, and as if right on cue, the rest of the crowd followed suit.
Each Shadow Person flattened their hands, crossed one over the other horizontally, and formed a “T” shape.
“For Tenebris?” Inpulsa rolled her eyes, and Zilla confirmed with a nod.
Finally, I got to see the fucker everyone’s been talking about.
Tenebris stepped out of the doorway and strutted about with his head held high. The Shadow King’s armor was distinctly different than any of his guards’, with pauldrons that stuck out nearly double his body width and hooked like a witch’s finger. His head took the shape of his helmet, which was completed by two small horns jutting out of the side and a tiny, spiny nub at the very crown of his noggin. To top it all off, the Shadow King didn’t have two glowing red eyes like the rest of his brethren. Instead, the entire helm of his helmet lit up with the bright crimson light.
Tenebris’ arms and legs were covered with individual pieces of plate armor that pinched to a point at the end and stretched over half of the next one. The effect was a sort of “spine” that ran down all of his appendages and came to a deadly point over his hands.
Last, but certainly not least, was his claymore. The fucker had a claymore sword so long, it was almost dragging behind him on the ground.
The massive sword, combined with the Caliginis’ already large wingspan, was going to make landing a critical hit on him a bitch.
Tenebris sauntered over to his chair, positioned himself in front of it, and then held out his arms with admiration.
“My loyal subjects,” he began in a deep, baritone voice that sounded like it was echoing in his own helmet, “thank you for coming out today. I hope you shall enjoy these two hours of entertainment just as much as I always do. Long live King Tenebris!”
The crowd roared back with an enthusiastic “long live Tenebris!” followed by a round of cheers that went on for a full minute before the king motioned for silence.
Damn. Zilla had claimed the Caliginis were putting on an act to appease Tenebris, but now I was starting to wonder. The people seemed to be putting on genuine enthusiasm when they were prompted by their king. If they were faking it, then they were damn good actors.
Were Zilla and her people lying to us? Was the Shining Alliance just a group of zealots who were dead set on taking out their king so they could gain power? This wouldn’t be the first violent, power-hungry group we’d encountered, but it would be the first one to try and trick us into doing its bidding.
Then again, there didn’t seem to be anything malicious about the Shining Alliance. They’d been nothing but kind and hospitable to us since we’d arrived in the Shadow World, and their story seemed to be legitimate.
I guess I was just gonna have to sit back and see how this one played out.
Tenebris took his seat, turned to the door, and clapped his hands.
“Bring out the first performer!” he bellowed.
Almost instantly, a Shadow Person cartwheeled out onto the stage through the doorway, landed on his feet, and threw his hands up excitedly.
The crowd went wild, and the performer responded with a tiny bow.
“Boring,” the king sighed as he patted the spot where his mouth would normally be. “This is the third time you’ve started off the show with that move this month, Shik. Don’t you have anything better for you king?”
“Well, Your Highness,” the Shadow Person responded in a nervous voice, “I’ve been doing this show for almost fifty years now. I must admit that it gets difficult to--”
“Find new material!” Tenebris screamed as he slammed his hands on the table. “I am the Shadow King, goddammit! I deserve to be treated to only the finest entertainment, and right now I wouldn’t even show this to an infant!”
The fool on the stage scratched his dark head in a panic and began to tremble. Then he raised his hand excitedly, bent down, and hopped up into the air. While he was off the ground, the Shadow Person tucked his body into a ball, hit the ground rolling, and spun over to the foot of the table. Then he popped out of his stance while simultaneously juggling three balls in the air. The fool caught all three of the balls, fell back into a circle, and repeated the process. After about five minutes of this action, he finally jumped back to his feet and took a stance while he panted heavily.
There was nothing but the white noise of the Shadow World in the air while he stood there, awaiting judgement. Then Tenebris began to clap.
“Bravo!” he boomed. “Juggling is a little last century, but I love the twist you put on it.”
After the crowd received their king’s approval, they broke out into cheers.
Okay, this was definitely all just an act.
We watched as the next few performers came out, pulled off their acts, and then disappeared back through the door. There were more jugglers, sword-swallowers, dancers, and even a few comedians.
“When is Caliban coming out?” I whispered to Zilla. “We have to strike before he comes on stage.”
“I believe there are still three more performers,” the Shadow Queen explained, “I’m certain your team will jump into action quite soon.”
The next set of performers were dancers who did what they called the “Dance of Death,” and I watched in awe as the performers danced across the stage as gracefully as a pair of classically-trained ballerinas. The dance utilized the Caliginis’ short stature, as it included lots of pendulum arm motions followed by rapid, brief full body twirls.
“Enjoying the show?” Deja asked as she nudged me with her elbow.
“What?” I broke out of my trance. “Oh, yeah, it’s really beautiful.”
“They’re telling the story of our creation,” Zilla explained, “symbolically, of course.”
“Of course,” I mused, “we have something like that on Earth Realm. We call it ‘interpretive dance,’ and it’s just as beautifully confusing.”
Once the dancers finished, they held their hands high, took a bow, and then took in the crowd’s cheers.
“That story gets better and better each time you two tell it!” Tenebris announced. “Bravo!”
&nb
sp; “Ya know what doesn’t get better each time?” I heard Todd’s voice call out from the crowd. “Your lame-ass compliments. Are you a fucking NPC, because I swear all your dialogue is made to be as generic as possible.”
“Who said that?” Tenebris demanded as he stood up, slammed his fists on the table, and scanned the audience for his heckler. “If you wish to criticize your king, do it to my face, coward!”
“Oh, I’m the coward?” Todd giggled. “At least I’m not the one who wore a bunch of can openers to a fucking variety show, bro. Seriously, are you afraid one of the jugglers is gonna accidentally slip up and gag you with one of his balls? And I ain’t talking about the juggling kind, neither.”
There were a few stifled giggles in the crowd, but that was enough to send Tenebris into a fit of rage.
The Shadow King stood up, grabbed the table from the side, and then flipped it as hard as he could. It spun all the way across the room before it struck the far wall and splintered into a million pieces.
“Who the fuck is talking?” Tenebris roared. “You think you’re funny, you little shit? We’ll see who’s laughing when you’re writing at the end of my sword!”
“Whoa!” Todd gasped. “Everybody knows I don’t touch the sword on the first date. I always save that until the third or fourth go-around. You gotta keep ‘em wanting more, especially when your dick’s as small as your overcompensating sword suggests.”
There was another stifled laugh, and Tenebris went berserk.
In a fit of rage, Tenebris turned to the nearest Shadow Person, whipped out his claymore, and then stabbed him straight through the head. As the innocent Caliginis’ body collapsed to the ground, the Shadow King let out a psychotic, frustrated laugh.
At the same time, five of his guards marched over to the front of the crowd, held out their spears in an attack formation, and grunted. Meanwhile, two of the bastards stayed firm in their position, right next to Tenebris.
