My Ex Boyfriend’s Daddy

by Callahan, Kelli

“Okay.” I nodded and pressed the side of my forehead to the window.

  I didn’t even know how to take one step, much less figure out what came after that—how many—which direction. The entirety of my future was devoted to Jake Anderson. Our plan was to walk across the stage at graduation and then leave for college at the end of the summer. We talked about getting married one day, having a family together, and all of the things normal couples dream about—because we were normal most of the time. Until I made him think I was some kind of freak. Not just a freak. A Dirty Freak.

  It was unbelievably embarrassing to have all of my dirty thoughts on full display for people to browse to their heart’s content, but that wasn’t the worst of it. I always thought Jake would be there for me if something awful happened. I didn’t expect him to totally abandon me. He knew what it was like to be embarrassed. I stood by his side when people laughed at him after his face was on television—getting dragged down the field by Trent Rigsby. I never once considered ending our relationship or abandoning him—I even got in a shouting match with a Sophomore girl who said something inappropriate.

  Is he really going to throw all of this away? I have to try talking to him again, but I can’t do it right now. Maybe after school…

  Chapter Five

  Arlo

  After the explosion at the dinner table on Friday night, I assumed I was in for a very long weekend with Jake, but he seemed to be better the next day. I didn’t want to speculate about the things that could have brought some temporary solace to his life. I never thought I’d be the kind of father that was willing to look the other way if my son was drinking, experimenting with marijuana, or enjoying the company of his girlfriend. I didn’t have to worry about any of those things with Jake, but sometimes, I wished he was off doing the stuff other kids his age had to hide from their parents. I wouldn’t have actively encouraged it, but I would have been smiling inside.

  I really, really hope things are different after he gets to college…

  I didn’t want Jake to lose his faith, but there was a balance between doing the right thing and enjoying the life he was blessed with. There was obviously something rather serious going on inside of him—something that could trigger anger at a moment’s notice. I tried to bring in a professional so he would have someone to talk with about it, but he refused to go. Instead of talking with someone that had a medical degree, he decided that Pastor John could give him the spiritual guidance he needed. It wasn’t working. His soul seemed to be tormented all of the time, and I had no idea why.

  * * *

  Mondays at the law firm were usually pretty busy. We closed for the weekend, but clients didn’t always want to forget about their case for two straight days—especially when they weren’t working. That meant we came in to a slew of voicemails, emails, and some were already waiting in the lobby when we officially opened for the day.

  My secretary, Belinda, tried to field everything and turn all of those concerns into calendar appointments. My paralegal, Frank, tried to handle the meetings unless there was something that needed my attention. With any luck, I could go about my normal business, and they would handle things. I always considered it a successful Monday when I didn’t have a nervous client sitting across from me that I wasn’t already scheduled to meet with when the day began.

  “Hey, I need to swing by the courthouse, and then I’m heading home for the day.” I walked over to Belinda’s desk and started to put on my suit jacket. “I’ll be late tomorrow. I have to make a trip to the city to meet with Demi Hart.”

  “Are you really going to let Hart Consulting put us on retainer?” Frank raised his eyebrows in concern. “They’ve been on the news an awful lot lately.”

  “You’re right.” I gave him a quick nod. “But the Harts have been family friends for a long time…”

  My trip to the courthouse took a lot less time than I thought it would on Monday. I had a couple of motions to file, and sometimes it would be so busy that I had to wait in line twice, but that wasn’t the case. I was in and out before my engine got cold. I changed clothes as soon as I got home, poured a glass of whiskey, and contemplated trying one of the cigars a client gave me after a verdict went their way. I tried not to indulge in my vices when Jake was home, but I had no idea how long it would be before he arrived. The school day was over, but if he met up with friends or hung out with Phoebe, he could be gone for hours. He might not even make it home for dinner.

  Wait? Was that his truck?

  I put my cigar back in the humidor, stuck my glass on a shelf out of sight, and walked towards the front part of the house. If it wasn’t Jake, someone was definitely in my driveway—I got my answer before I even made it to the window so I could check. The front door swung up, Jake stormed in, and then he slammed it so hard that the glass rattled.

  “Are you okay?” I put my hands on my hips and stared at him.

  He doesn’t look okay.

  “No!” He threw down his book bag, and once I got a good look at his face, I could tell that he had been crying.

  “Talk to me, son.” I took a step forward and expected him to recoil if I tried to touch him, but he let me put my hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

  “I had a really bad day.” His voice calmed, but the sorrow and anger weren’t completely gone from it. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?” I tilted my head slightly. “It doesn’t matter what it is—even if you just want to vent.”

  “I said I didn’t want to talk about it!” The mixture of sorrow and anger was instantly replaced was red-hot rage.

  “Okay, that’s fine.” I lifted my hand and took a step back. “If you need me, I’m here. If this is something you need to work through on your own, I understand that too.”

  “I’m going to stay with my grandparents.” Jake shook his head angrily and picked up his backpack.

  All I could do was watch him walk away. I never had any problems with my ex-wife’s family, and I was glad that they were in Jake’s life. I wished his mother had that much interest in seeing him. We got married way too young. She was pregnant with Jake when we tied the knot, and it was one loaded barrel away from being a shotgun wedding. Her parents were extremely religious, and while they would have never forced us to tie the knot, they made it very clear that they expected their grandchild to be born in wedlock. Jake’s mother and I barely stayed married long enough for me to sign his birth certificate.

  I’m sure being abandoned by her has impacted him in some way, but it’s one of those things he never wants to talk about…

  I walked back into the library after Jake left and retrieved my drink from the shelf. If he was gone for the night, there was no reason for me to be concerned with keeping my vices out of sight. I sent a text message to his grandparents to let them know he was coming and to make sure they would let me know if he didn’t show up for some reason. I returned to the living room, put my glass down, and lit my cigar. I rarely smoked, but I had a few clients that assumed I did because it was my father’s favorite vice. I inherited it from him, the same way I got most of his clients—simply by being his son.

  My first glass of whiskey disappeared before the cigar had burned to the midway point. It was feeling like a three whiskey night instead of just two. I didn’t like feeling so helpless when it came to my son—and I hated that he felt like he could talk to his grandparents instead of me. They normally shared any concerns that came up if they thought I needed to know about the issue, but they weren’t very forthcoming when I was the catalyst.

  I contemplated sending them a follow-up message to see if they would be willing to let me know if I was the problem. I got what appeared to be my answer before I could send the message—a car door slammed outside my house, and when I walked to the window, I saw Phoebe walking towards the steps. She was disheveled, and her eyes were so red they were almost glowing. I assumed her tears had something to do with Jake, which would mean that
his might have something to do with her.

  “Phoebe, what’s wrong?” I pulled the door open.

  “Is Jake here?” A tear streamed down her face, and I could see that both of her eyes were swollen from crying.

  “No, he’s not.” I shook my head quickly. “Please, come inside. Let me get you some water—or tea if you’d prefer.”

  “I really need something stronger than water or tea right now.” Her eyes drifted to my glass as soon as she walked in.

  “I’m sorry, I can tell you’re not having a good day, but I’m not going to give alcohol to an eighteen-year-old.” I shook my head quickly.

  “I understand.” She wiped her eyes. “Water would be great…”

  I fixed a glass of water, walked back into the living room, and handed it to Phoebe. She was more than upset—she was visibly shaking. I actually did consider pushing my glass of whiskey across the table when I realized how much of a wreck she appeared to be. I was used to Jake’s phone lighting up with text messages every now and then—a whole lot more than mine—but Phoebe’s phone seemed to be blowing up nonstop. She clicked to send her calls to voicemail so many times that she finally just turned them off.

  “Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” I leaned forward and rolled the tip of my cigar in the ashtray until it went out.

  “I didn’t know you smoked.” She ignored my question and stared at the swirl of smoke for a couple of seconds before pulling what appeared to be a vaping device out of her purse. “Do you mind?”

  “Go ahead.” I shrugged. “I don’t care.”

  Hopefully there’s nothing worse than nicotine in that thing…

  “Thank you.” She pressed it between her lips for a second and then exhaled vapor—her hand trembled so much I thought she was going to drop it. “Do you know when Jake will be back?”

  “Phoebe, I’m sorry.” I grimaced. “He’s staying with his grandparents tonight.”

  “I really screwed up.” Her shoulders slumped forward, and I saw fresh tears forming in her eyes.

  “Let me get you some tissues.” I hopped up and retrieved them from the bathroom.

  She may need the whole box.

  “Thank you.” Phoebe grabbed a couple of tissues as soon as I put the box down and patted her eyes—she had been crying so much her mascara was almost gone.

  “If you want to talk…” I felt my heart breaking as I watched her continue to cry. “Or if you don’t…”

  “I ruined the best thing in my life.” She went from crying to practically sobbing in an instant. “All because of some stupid game.”

  I tried to understand what she was telling me, but her words started to come out as choppy fragments of sentences and pieces of thoughts—between tear-soaked sobs. I was able to decipher something about a game, a list, a mistake, and whatever it was really upset my son. Phoebe was a wreck, and I hated seeing her like that. I knew her before she dated my son, and she worked for me, so things between us had always been pretty friendly. I had a lot of respect for her, and I didn’t think she would do anything to intentionally sabotage her relationship with Jake—she put up with things most girlfriends wouldn’t, especially when he got in one of his moods. I expected Jake to be the one sitting in front of me one day explaining how he did something to ruin the best thing that ever happened to him.

  “Kristy Sinclair is such a bitch…” Phoebe finally said something that I could easily decipher.

  “That’s something we can both agree on.” I nodded quickly. “But what does she have to do with this? I don’t think Jake is friends with her anymore.”

  “Oh god, I’m talking in circles.” Phoebe put her hands on her face and let out an audible groan. “I should just go…”

  “You’re not going anywhere like this.” I immediately shook my head back and forth. “You are way too upset to be driving.”

  “I didn’t drive.” She sighed. “My friend is waiting at the end of the street. She dropped me off…”

  “I still don’t think you should go anywhere until you’ve had a moment to calm down.” I pushed the water closer. “Please, take a drink of water and try to breathe.”

  “Won’t I drown?” She lifted the water, and I saw the hint of a smile try to form on the corner of her lips.

  “Ha…” I nodded and barely suppressed a chuckle. “One after the other—not at the same time.”

  Phoebe took a drink of water, closed her eyes, and tried to calm herself down. She gave her vape pen quite a workout, but if it calmed her down, I didn’t care if she fogged up my living room. It smelled like watermelon—better than what I was putting in the air right before she arrived. After a couple of minutes, she started talking again, and it was a lot more coherent. There were more tears, but she didn’t turn into a bawling mess before she finished explaining what happened. I listened intently and tried to avoid reacting with as much shock as I felt. I understood why Jake was upset once she told me what happened. It was a lot to take in—but I could tell she needed support a whole lot more than judgment.

  “I never thought anyone would read it…” Her voice trailed off.

  “It sounds like you got taken advantage of.” I nodded quickly. “Kristy did not take it well when Jake came back from his grandparents with a new perspective on life.”

  “Yeah, she made it pretty difficult for us last year, but she didn’t try anything like this…” Phoebe sighed. “I thought I would never see her again after she graduated.”

  Phoebe calmed down—a little more with each passing minute—so I just tried to keep her talking. I couldn’t erase what she did, nor could I change Jake’s reaction to it. He had a right to be upset, but ending their relationship seemed like a pretty drastic step to take. If I had a list of everything my high school girlfriend wanted to try, I would have printed it out and asked when we could get started, but Jake wasn’t like me. He was dealing with different emotions, way more angst, and the turmoil of a tortured soul. I wanted to tell Phoebe that everything was going to be okay between them, but I had no way to know if that was true.

  “I’ll try to talk to Jake when he comes home.” I picked up my whiskey and took a sip of it. “I don’t know if he’ll listen to me, or if it will change anything, but maybe I can get through to him…”

  “I just want to have a rational discussion with him about it.” Phoebe shook her head with a sad stare on her face. “If he’s mad, that’s fine, and I deserve that—but I don’t want it to be over.”

  “Jake should be mad at the situation a lot more than he’s mad at you.” I exhaled sharply. “He should be fucking furious with Kristy.”

  “He seems to have skipped right over that part so that he could break up with me.” Phoebe took another drink of her water. “I should go. I have no way to get Kristy to take down the post and no way to talk to Jake. I might as well just go home and face my mother—I’m sure she’s going to find out about this eventually. Maybe I can be the one that tells her to soften the blow.”

  “I’m sorry this happening to you.” I rose to my feet as Phoebe stood and immediately pulled her into my arms for a hug. “If you need anything, I’m here—I mean that.”

  “Can you sue Kristy and make her take the post down?” Phoebe looked up at me, and for the second time, I saw the hint of a smile.

  “I wish I could.” I exhaled sharply.

  “Thank you for listening—Mr. Anderson.” Her eyes clouded over and removed all evidence of the smile. “I can’t even call you Daddy as a joke anymore.”

  “It’s fine.” I pulled her in for another hug. “You can call me whatever you want.”

  Phoebe cried on my shoulder for a couple of minutes before she pulled away and walked to the end of the driveway. I watched until her friend picked her up, just to make sure she was safe. I wasn’t in the mood to finish my cigar or my drink. I got rid of them both and tried to call Jake a couple of times, but he didn’t pick up. I called his grandmother, and she confirmed that he was there and very upset, so they
asked Pastor John to speak with him. I doubted that was going to do anything to ease the burden on his heart, but it was clear that I couldn’t do anything either—I was on the other side of his life with the rest of the sinners.

  Fuck it, if I can’t help him—maybe there is something I can do to help Phoebe.

  I found the number of a lawyer that I did business with a few times—a guy named Mason Romano, who said he would owe me one after our last negotiations went in his favor. I never thought I would collect on it, but he was someone who could possibly help with Phoebe’s situation. He made his name in a high-profile lawsuit that targeted parents for failing to take action when their child’s bullying of another student went too far. I didn’t think there was a case against Kristy’s parents since she was already eighteen, but I wasn’t looking to actually file a lawsuit—I wanted someone who could instill fear and panic.

  Just enough to make her take down that post and leave Phoebe alone…

  Chapter Six

  Phoebe

  Six months later

  I don’t know how long it was before the students at Penny Grove High School stopped laughing at me. I wasn’t there to hear the humor finally drain out of their voices. Kristy took the post down a day after she ruined my life, but the damage was already done. I tried to talk to Jake a few times, but he refused. Eventually, I accepted that I was never going to get his forgiveness and simply gave up on the life I thought I was going to have. My mother—she didn’t disown me, but I could see the disappointment in her eyes when I told her what happened. I continued to earn her disappointment when I dropped out of high school and became a ghost that roamed the streets of Penny Grove after everyone else was in bed.

  Until today… As much as I hurt, I do want to see Val walk across that stage.

  My mother tried to convince me to change schools, but I didn’t think that would help—my decision to drop out led to our first real fight. I wasn’t a little girl that she could fix with the flat side of her hairbrush anymore. I didn’t plan to live under her roof much longer, and I had no intention of staying in Penny Grove. I was all done with the work I could do at Anderson & Anderson—it was easy enough to go in after it got dark and leave before anyone showed up the next morning. Mr. Anderson was generous enough to pay me for the time I worked, even when it exceeded the part-time hours I was originally hired for.