Chosen Heart (The Hart Series)

by Stewart, Ann

  I know I shouldn’t be worried about my so called friend, but, after last night, I don’t want to cause any more damage to my relationship with Alex. Not even for Cole. Before I lean in to give him his kiss, I glance in Alex’s direction to make sure he’s not freaking out like I am. Unfortunately for me, his attention is completely fixed, standing as still as a statue, waiting for my next move. The way he’s watching me is unnerving. Shaking his head slightly, I receive his message loud and clear. I’m right there with you, Alex. What he doesn’t understand, though, is that if I deny Cole, it will only send him into a drunken fit which will definitely cause a scene.

  Just get this over with, Ely! With closed eyes, Cole stands in front of me…waiting. I lean in and suddenly his eyes shoot open, at the same time, his hand grasps the back of my neck. Forcefully, he pushes my face closer. I react as my hands move up to his shoulders, trying to push him away with all the strength I have, but it’s just no use. Cole’s wet lips are against mine, trying to force his tongue into my mouth. All I can smell is alcohol and it takes everything I have, not to gag. Struggling against him, trying desperately to pry our lips apart, I start to feel my effort working as my struggle appears to have waned Cole’s efforts. His face no longer pressed against mine, I open my eyes and realize it wasn’t my strength that separated us.

  The scene playing out in front of me is in slow motion, my mind struggling to keep up. Alex has Cole by the back of his shirt, forcefully pushing him aside. Alex’s look of pure hatred is masked with his tense collected self, as he stands, fists at his side.

  “It’s a kiss on the cheek, asshole! Can’t you read?” Alex points towards a small cardboard sign posted on the wall behind me. “This is a charity event and my employees are not being paid to accept your sexual advances.”

  “Your employee didn’t seem to mind. Besides, she’s my friend!” Adjusting his shirt, Cole returns Alex’s icy glare. Alex glances around and notices a small crowd starting to build as tension continues to escalate between them.

  “My employee did seem to mind. If you weren’t intoxicated, you would have noticed her pushing you away.” Lowering his voice to a menacing growl, Alex continues. “Get out of here now before I have you escorted off the property.”

  Please Cole…leave.

  I can’t hide the pool of tears, and fight back the urge to jump in between the two men in my life. Cole’s sad eyes look at me before quietly walking away, deciding not to make any more of a scene.

  Alex turns to me and searches my face, trying to gauge my emotional state. Slowly, he reaches up to touch my face, but remembers where we are and abruptly stops himself. Instead, his hands drop flat on the counter of the booth. “You okay?” he whispers.

  Trying to regain the connection we had from this morning, I look him in the eyes, hoping he can still see that I only want him. “I’m fine. Thank you.” With heavy eyes, Alex takes a deep breath. Instantaneously, he’s regained his composure and turns to walk away. My heart stings for causing so much grief. I knew inviting Cole could cause problems, but I never imagined it would end up like this.

  The rest of my shift at the kissing booth runs smoothly and without any further incidents. I haven’t seen Cole since the altercation, and wonder if he’s even still here. I really hope he’s gone home to sober up. As much as he’s hurt me, I don’t want to hurt him. Not anymore than I already have.

  It’s getting late in the afternoon and I’m surprised how many people are still standing around, looking at the different booths and bidding on the silent auctions. Luckily, the weather has cooled down, but the storm clouds are gathering and I can’t help the ominous feeling, a very heavy feeling.

  I search for Cole as I exit the booth. My heart sinks when I find him propped up against the event center wall, looking a lot steadier. Hopefully, he’s sobered up, instead of drowning his frustrations with more alcohol. If he did, I would lose what little respect I have left for him. Last night, I said some horrible things, and meant it at the time, but I can’t imagine not having him in my life. I have spent too much time invested in my friendship to end it like this. Dread builds knowing I have to deal with him, and the situation I’ve put us in.

  Finding Alex by the blood pressure machine, I notice he’s in full discussion with one of the managers from marketing. I know talking to Cole will set him off and if I can handle the situation without him intervening, the better it will be for all of us.

  Urgently, I walk towards Cole, grabbing him by the elbow. Walking him back behind the event center, we pass the caution tape that was sectioned off for the fundraiser. Finally alone, I lay into him with all my frustrations. “What the fuck was that about, Cole?”

  “Watch your tone with me, Elyssa! I’m tired of you fucking around with my emotions. Maybe I should go have another talk with your CEO and let her know all about your extracurricular activities?”

  I take a step back. What? How am I messing with his emotions? “Cole, I’m not doing anything with you, or your emotions. I’ve told you time and time again that we are just friends. You have no right to get involved in my personal life like this. Stay the hell out of it!”

  “Are you fucking him?” I can’t believe…no, I can…

  “That is none of your business. What I do and who I do it with hasn’t been any of your concern for over three years.”

  “So help me God, Ely…he better keep his fucking hands off you.” Okay, I’ve had enough.

  “Or what Cole? What are you going to do? No, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know, nor do I care. I have put up with your shit for too long. This was the last straw. You need to get out of here. Get out of my life.” Mortified tears stream down my face as I choke out the words I never thought I would say. Shit…am I doing the right thing? I’m all he has. No, Elyssa! He can’t dictate your life like this. This is what’s best, for you and for him.

  “Elyssa, can I have a word with you?” Alex’s words cut through the tension building between us. I turn to look at him; the unease on his face causes me to break out in sobs. Alex takes a step forward to reach out for me. “Are you okay?”

  “Mind your own business. We are having a private conversation, back the fuck up!” Cole raises his hands in the air as he screams.

  God please, this is not happening to me.

  Alex approaches, pushing aside the caution tape, fury rippling over his body as his muscles tense. “She is my business. Now what the fuck did you say to her? Why is she upset?” Alex questions Cole as I hurry towards him, placing my hands on his chest, pushing him back.

  Cole looks astonished. He’s never been one to take responsibility for his actions and sees no fault in himself. Pointing at his own chest with his thumb, “Me? I didn’t do anything. She just can’t handle the fact that she needs to tell you the truth.” What in the hell is he talking about?

  My sobs are in full force not allowing me to speak, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t stand up for myself. I turn to pounce on Cole, but Alex stands in the way, blocking my way.

  “Truth?” Alex tilts his head in confusion, his hands still fisted at his side.

  “The truth is that she’ll always be mine.” Cole lifts his left index finger and slowly passes it along his upper lip, inhaling. “I can still smell her.” My mouth drops. Fuck. My. Life.

  Before I can call Cole out on his shit, Alex charges towards him, sending both of them to the ground. In the blink of an eye, Alex topples him and punches start to fly. One after the other, making direct contact with different areas of Cole’s face and head.

  “Alex, stop…please stop…” I beg rushing towards him. Grabbing him by the shoulders, I try and pry him away from Cole’s huddled body as he tries to shield himself from Alex’s blows. Not stopping the torment, Alex pushes me aside, making me fall to the hard pavement below.

  “Get the fuck off of me!” he screams. His fists continue to rise and fall, landing directly on Cole’s forearms, nose and hair line. My Alex is nowhere to be seen. This Alex sc
ares the hell out of me.

  Pulling myself up, I realize that Alex isn’t going to stop. If I don’t do something, he’s going to kill him. His fists continue their descent; I’m not sure how much more of this Cole’s body can take. Struggling to get off the ground, I rush over towards Alex’s menacing growl; I have to do something.

  “Alex please, stop?!” I scream as I launch myself on top of Cole’s now bloody face. I brace myself for impact, but his fists never make contact. Through clenched eyes I peek up at Alex. Enraged, he stands over us as Cole lays limp below my shielding body. “Alex, he’s drunk. Can’t you see he’s not worth it?”

  “Always making excuses for him, Elyssa. Now I know why.” There is no reasoning with him; logic replaced by revulsion. His knuckles are bloody and I’m not sure if it’s his or Cole’s. Feeling Cole stir below me, I stand to look at Alex’s wounds.

  I reach for him, but he pulls away. “Damn it let me see your hand.”

  “Don’t fucking touch me.” My heart sinks.

  “Alex, please? I’m so sorry about…all of this.” I wave my hand in the air pointing from him to Cole, still lying on the ground.

  “Don’t fucking play me, Elyssa. This is your fault! I hope you’re happy now.”

  “My fault?!” I mumble, shaking my head in confusion trying to stop the tears from falling.

  “Don’t you dare cry! You have no right.” My lips quiver as his words strike me, almost as hard as his fists. “You two deserve each other. Fuck this!” he yells, throwing his hands in the air as he storms off towards the parking garage.

  Ely, don’t give up!

  I run after him, begging him to stop. “Alex, please don’t leave…” Finally catching up to him, I grab his elbow.

  “I told you to get the fuck away from me. Go take care of your so called best friend, Elyssa! I can’t deal with you right now.” OUCH!

  Misery overwhelms me, as I watch him walk away. I am so lost. Panic sets in and I’m frozen in place. He just walked away from me…from us. It’s over.

  Not knowing what to do or where to go, I slowly make my way back to Cole. Slumping down next to his unconscious body, I place my head in my hands, in utter defeat.

  This whole situation seems surreal, just a bad dream that I’m fighting to wake up from. It’s not a dream Ely, this is reality. Your reality. After the past few weeks of working through a plethora of emotions, to have everything we’ve worked so hard for, end here, in this moment, is a hard slap in the face.

  “Ely?” Stirring, he tries to pull himself up from the ground, grabbing at me for support.

  In this moment, I have no patience for him. Dealing with my own despair, I barely have enough strength to help myself up, let alone a drunk, broken asshole. As I reach down and place my hands underneath his arms, I try and help him to stand. “Cole, get up! I have to take you home.” Fully upright, I place his arm over my shoulder and carry him towards the parking garage. Because he’s hurt and can barely walk, it’s a struggle to make it to my car. He slumps into the seat, checking his bloody face in the mirror.

  With the thought of losing everything, I take a minute for myself, and breathe. That’s all I can do. Breathe. Ely. Breathe. Before I get into the car, the realization that Alex is really gone hits me. Trying to hold myself together, knowing I can’t stay, I reach into my pocket and grab my phone.

  **Sorry, Janice. I have to leave. Emergency came up.**

  I receive a response right away.

  *What? I just got a text from Mr. James that he was leaving and he put me in charge. What’s going on Elyssa? I need your help!*

  I’m glad he had the sense to let her know that he was leaving. Someone has to be in charge while he’s gone. This is his fundraiser, which makes me feel even worse.

  **Sorry! I have to leave. I’ll fill you in later.**

  While navigating through the garage, I pass by Alex’s usual parking spot. I cannot bare thinking of the hurt I’ve caused him, but his harsh words still sting; how could he be so cruel. I know he was angry, but why would he believe a word that Cole said. None of it was true, I thought he knew this, and trusted me. I need to find him and make him see the truth.

  “Where are you taking me?”

  “Home,” is all I can muster. Anger radiates through my pores as I look over at Cole. If I didn’t feel partially responsible for his bloody face, I would reach over and punch him myself.

  “What about my Jeep?”

  “Fuck your Jeep! I’m not going back there.” I can’t say any more to him right now. Alex has already made Cole wish he never came to the fundraiser, what are my words of anger going to do that his fists haven’t already done.

  My tires screech as we come to a halt outside of Cole’s apartment. “We’re here, can you get up?”

  “I’m not a fucking invalid!” Trying to hide his wounded ego, he attempts to pulls himself up and out of the car. Approaching the passenger door, I cringe as I get a closer look at his face. His right eye and cheek are slowly starting to swell.

  “Give me your keys.” He fishes in his pocket and grudgingly hands them over. I can’t wait for him. Knowing that because of me, Alex is out there, hurt and fuming, I rush to open Cole’s front door. Leaving it propped open, I retreat to the confines of my car as I pass him already making his way up the walkway.

  “Thanks,” he whispers as he passes by me.

  “Do you need anything?”

  “No! I think you’ve done enough.” Cole reaches the door, slamming it behind him. I don’t know how much more of this I can take. Alex is mad at me. Cole is mad at me. What else can go wrong?

  I need to talk to Alex, to straighten whatever just happened, out. Of course, when I call his cell, it goes directly to voicemail. Think, Ely. Trying to figure out where he went is hard when I know so little about him. I need to know what’s going on in his head. I need to know that Cole hasn’t ruined what little chance I had for happiness. Our chance for happiness.

  Starting up the engine, I head in the only place I know to check, and I hope to God he’s there.

  CHAPTER 13

  My stomach is curled in knots as I speed up Alex’s long driveway. I've already tried calling him three times, and wasn't surprised when my calls were sent directly to voicemail. No, not surprised, but I’d be lying if it didn’t wound my already broken heart. Giving it one more shot… Ring…Ring…Hi, you’ve reached Alex... Really, Alex? That’s even worse. At least before, I knew his phone was shut off. And now? Now I know he’s screening his calls and purposely not talking to me. His phone being shut off was him purposely not talking to you, too, Ely. Whatever!

  I know how things appear, but if he’d just talk to me, I’d tell him anything and everything he wants to know. I need to set things right with him, to get back to our happy place. The place we were this morning. Even at breakfast, when my anxiety was at its peak, it didn't stop our little showers of affection. We still fed each other bites of our pancakes and held hands under the table. I want to go back to that moment, to feel like his girl again.

  His car is absent as I pull up to the front of his house. I know he could have parked in the garage, but the pit of my stomach tells me otherwise. I'm afraid, afraid of what he might do, or what he might say. What if he rejects me? My heart would shatter into a million pieces. With a deep breath, and a heavy heart, I exit the car and walk towards his front door, still trying to figure out what I’m supposed to say. What can I say? Alex I’m sorry, please don’t hate me? It’s not what you think. Nothing seems right when all I really want to tell him is how I feel. Alex, I’ve fallen for you. I can’t imagine my world without you in it. Alex...I think I love you.

  I knock softly on the oak door. No answer. Knocking again, I stare blankly at the unopened door. Still no answer. After a few minutes of numbness, I'm just about to give up when I notice the ornately decorated doorbell popping out at me. Ring me damn it. I can't give up. With a last ditch effort at his home, I ring the bell; soft chimes echo through the wo
oden door. I listen closely for any sign of movement, but still no answer. Turning to head back to the car, the door creeps opens and panic sets in. But, instead of the beautiful blue eyes of my love, I’m met with the soft curious eyes of Delores.

  “Sorry to bother you…I was looking for Alex,” I stammer. What was I thinking? In my quest to right all the wrongs in my relationship, I hadn’t thought of how my actions would affect others. “Delores, I’m sorry if I woke her.”

  “Mr. James left about ten minutes ago, Ms. Hart,” she mentions sweetly, not even bothering to bring up Nana.

  “Call me Elyssa, please. He didn’t mention where he was headed, did he?”

  “No, Ms. Ha…Elyssa.” With grief pulling down my lips, Delores’ facial expression changes to one of pity.

  “Sorry again for bothering you. If he calls or comes home, will you let him know I was here?” Turning, I stagger back to my car as tears stream down my face.

  “Elyssa?” I turn, blotting my tears with the back of my hand. “I've been with Mr. James and Miss Molly for over two years. If it means anything, I’ve never seen Mr. James as happy as he’s been the past couple of weeks.”

  It does mean something…it means everything. It means hope.

  “Thank you, Delores.” She’s given me what I needed, reigniting my quest to find him. Still no return calls, I try him again. Three rings this time, but again my call goes to voicemail. Think hard, Ely. Where would he go?

  Suddenly, through the haze, a light bulb goes off. I know where he is.

  ~~~~~

  With the sun setting, I can picture the view from Red Rock; the one place Alex goes to find solace. But, I’m no longer his own personal Red Rock. Now I’m just a horrid memory.

  The twenty minute drive is torturous, but as I race around the corner, relief hits me the moment I see the taillights of Alex’s BMW. Parking directly behind his car, I block him in. He’ll have no choice but to talk to me.