The Baby Shift- California

by Becca Fanning

  Franny dug the long-forgotten dress out from where it was hidden behind her hanging shoe rack. She shimmied it on and turned around. Rose immediately sat up and started clapping.

  “Mom! You look amazing! Look!” she said, leaping off the bed and running over to Franny. She turned Franny toward the full-length mirror on the door of her closet. Franny had to admit, the dress did look good. It hugged her in all the right places, accentuating her tiny waist and somehow making her moderate chest look almost voluptuous. The dark color set off her naturally tan skin.

  “Wear your hair in a bun, put on those earrings I gave you for your birthday, and you’re ready,” Rose said, beaming up at her.

  Franny did as instructed by threading the thin silver hoops through her ears and tying her hair up in what Rose told her was called a “top bun.”

  Wedge espadrilles and a jean jacket completed the look. Franny couldn’t believe it. She looked good! Great, even. She hadn’t been on a date in over eight years, not since before Rose’s dad had walked out on them, saying he simply couldn’t handle being in a house with two “crazy she-wolves.” But maybe Ed was the perfect person to break that dry spell. He was nice, friendly, and they were going to a bookstore, so if worst came to worst and Franny had an anxiety attack or worse, she could just bury herself in the crime section with some Dorothy L. Sayers until the feelings subsided. But she had a sneaking suspicion that with Ed, she wouldn’t feel nervous.

  And her suspicions were proved right. Ed picked Franny up the next day from their house, parking his used red Saab at the bottom of their driveway and walking up to the house to ring the doorbell. Rose opened it and immediately threw her arms around Ed, thanking him for “taking my mom off my hands for a day.” Ed laughed and gave Rose a new book, the newest release from Sandhya Menon, then looked up and noticed Franny.

  Franny didn’t miss the widening of his eyes or the softly muttered “wow” that escaped his mouth. “You look…you look amazing, Franny,” Ed breathed.

  “She does, doesn’t she? Mom, you should try dressing up more often,” Rose said, turning to her mother and winking at her. Franny gave her daughter a fake scowl, then looked up at Ed.

  “Thanks for picking me up. I just need to check something with Rose, and then we’re ready to go, okay?” He nodded.

  Franny let Rose into the kitchen. “Okay, so Mrs. Jenkins is picking you up in half an hour, and then you’re going to Kristy’s house to hang out and sleepover, right?”

  Rose nodded. “Yes. And I have the address of the bookstore, plus your cellphone, so I can text you if I need anything. And Mrs. Jenkins also knows where you are. It’ll be fine, Mom. Go have fun.”

  Franny stooped down and gave Rose an embarrassing, smacking kiss on the cheek which Rose immediately rubbed off. “Can you go now so I can go to my room and read?” Franny nodded, picked her keys up from the bowl sitting on the kitchen counter and walked toward Ed.

  “Okay, Mom stuff is taken care of. Let’s go!”

  ---

  The drive to Palo Alto took only fifteen minutes, but during that time, Ed and Franny managed to cover a range of topics. She told him the short version of how she and Rose had ended up in Redwood City, leaving out the part about being kidnapped by her bosses for being a werewolf and helping another of her kind try to escape being a test subject in a shady experiment. That was definitely more of a fifth-date conversation.

  Franny listened intently as Ed told her how he’d come to be a librarian.

  “I always loved books as a kid, but I figured I’d have to work some boring desk job to fuel my reading habit until my dad said at the dinner table one night, apropos of nothing, ‘You know, Edward, you like reading so much, you should be a librarian!’ I couldn’t believe it. I’d never even considered it. It sounds terrible, but because I’d only really ever seen female librarians in both real life and movies, I never realized that was even an option for me. Which is ridiculous, because the librarian in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, my favorite movie of all time, was a dude.”

  Franny smiled and laughed. “I know how you feel. I didn’t think I could be a scientist until high school because I always assumed it was a man’s job, a white man’s especially, but then my chemistry teacher encouraged me to apply for a chemistry program at the local college. She said being a Latinx girl made going into chemistry even better, because ‘the world needs more women of color in science.’ It honestly changed my life. Things were…not great when I was a kid and being able to escape into academia was my saving grace.”

  Ed nodded as he pulled into a parking spot outside a bookstore called Reader’s Paradise. As Franny got out of the car and walked around to the sidewalk outside the shop, she stood in awe. The shop windows were covered in an amazing display made of what looked like pages from a book, which had been folded and glued to create what looked like a mini-replica of Hogwarts. Franny took out her phone and couldn’t resist snapping a picture and sending it to Rose.

  “This place is amazing!” Franny breathed as Ed held the door out for her and she walked into the shop. Famous quotes from Octavia Butler, Stephen King, and Haruki Marukami were painted on the dark purple walls, and there were twinkle lights strung from the exposed pipes in the ceiling. The whole place smelled like the perfect combination of paper and incense, resulting from essential oil diffusers littered throughout the store. Franny spotted the crime section and made a beeline for it, delighting that the first display she saw was for crime authors of color. She looked back at Ed and pointed, mouthing “holy shit” and delighting in his resulting laughter.

  They stayed there for over an hour and a half, looking through each section and making a few selections. Franny ended up with ten books and bought another one at the checkout on the advice of the sales girl. “It’s the debut novel by a new local romance author, and it’s out of this world. We just got it in this week, and I stayed up all night on Tuesday finishing it. If you like historical regency romance, you’ll love it.”

  “I’ll take it!” Franny said and added it to her pile. She paid for both her books and Ed’s, which numbered fewer than hers but were, in most cases, twice the length. “I like weighty tomes,” he’d told Franny with a straight face as he approached the counter, and she’d laughed. This was the most relaxed she’d felt around a man in years. Yes, Ed was extremely attractive and witty, but there was something about him that made her feel like she was hanging out with a longtime friend.

  “So, I take it you liked that place?” Ed asked as they got back into the car with their bags of books.

  “Liked it?! I wanted to live there! I can’t wait to bring Rose here. That YA section looked amazing, and they had a whole display devoted to Angie Thomas read-alikes. She’ll go insane,” Franny said as she buckled in her seatbelt.

  “You’re lucky to have such a voracious reader for a kid. I always hoped my kids would be like that, too. Can’t imagine if I had to give up reading time as a parent,” Ed mused as he pulled out of the parking space and onto the busy street.

  As he drove them toward the Stanford campus, Franny talked about how parenthood had both changed her drastically and allowed her to become the more honest version of herself. “Things definitely changed after I had Rose—I didn’t have time to submit articles to different journals every month or volunteer on special committees, but I also grew so much as a person. Having kids makes you re-evaluate your priorities. Now, I don’t feel bad if I skip a conference or can’t take on another advisee. I know I need time to spend with Rose as well as time with myself, so I make sure that happens. I used to be so concerned with my academic career, with what my standing was in my field, but now, I couldn’t care less. I just want us both to be happy, you know? And right now, finally, we are.”

  Ed looked over at Franny momentarily. She saw the question in his eyes before he asked it. “Were you not happy before?”

  “Oh, well…” But Franny was saved from having to answer fully because just then, a parking spot opened up and Ed
pulled into it. They were near the stadium, on the edge of the athletics area that included the playing fields and sports center. Even from the street, Franny could hear shouts from the athletes nearby. The noise set her on edge, heightening the feeling of anxiety that had sparked in her the moment Ed had asked her why she and Rose hadn’t been happy for so long. But she had to do this, to explain it to him, if only to prove to herself that she could tell a man about her past without worrying that after hearing it, he, too, would run in the opposite direction.

  Franny stepped out the car and shut the door before turning to face Ed. “So. Your question.”

  Ed interrupted her before she could go any further. “I’m sorry for asking. If it makes you uncomfortable, you absolutely don’t have to answer.”

  Franny smiled, appreciating how understanding he was being. As they began to walk toward the main quad, Franny gave Ed the abbreviated version of her and Rose’s past. She told him about getting pregnant unexpectedly during her Ph.D., about resigning to find a job that would support them and allow her to look after Rose. She breezed over Rose’s dad leaving, though she didn’t miss the frown that marred Ed’s face when Franny mentioned her ex packing a suitcase and leaving in the middle of what had been a nice Saturday. The whole time, Ed listened intently, like he wanted to know every minute detail of Franny’s life, the good and the bad. When she finished her story, he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and took her hand. “I’m so sorry that happened to you, but I hope you know that I’ll do whatever I can, as your friend, to make sure you feel comfortable in Redwood City.”

  Franny was shocked speechless, but Ed didn’t seem to mind. Still holding her hand, he resumed walking, leading her to Coupa Cafe, a Venezuelan eatery and coffee shop. “I basically lived here during my undergrad,” Ed told Franny as he held the door open for her. And sure enough, one of the women working the counter waved to him as he walked over.

  “Ed! Long time. No see! Where have you been?” The woman, whose nametag read “Marcia,” asked him.

  “Handing out books to the voracious readers of Redwood City, one of whom is here with me today. Franny, meet Marcia. Marcia and I know each other from when I did my master’s degree and fell asleep here one night after staying up all night for an exam on the Dewey Decimal System. And Marcia, Franny and I know each other from the library in Redwood.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Franny said.

  “You as well!” Marcia said followed with a huge smile on her face. “What can I get for you both?”

  Franny scanned the menu, but the words were beginning to swim together. Her head was giving its telltale ache, the one that said “ALERT. ALERT. ABOUT TO SHIFT” and Franny knew she needed to find a quiet place to breathe deeply and get her bearings.

  “Um, I’ll have something with a lot of sugar and soy milk. Where’s your bathroom?”

  Marcia pointed to her left, where a large door marked “Majeures” was painted an inviting shade of teal.

  “Great. Ed, I’ll be right back,” she said, barely looking at him as she fast-walked to the bathroom door. Inside it was blessedly cool and smelled like eucalyptus. Franny spied an essential oil diffuser on the counter. What was it with Palo Alto and essential oils?

  But Franny didn’t have time to ponder that. She rushed to a stall, put the toilet lid down and sat. She put her hands on her neck and her head between her knees and began taking slow, meditative breaths, just like her yoga teacher had shown her. She could feel fur beginning to sprout on her arms and legs, could feel her teeth beginning to morph into the fangs of a wolf, but she had to resist. She couldn’t shift here in a bathroom on the Stanford campus in the middle of a date with a man who was, essentially, the definition of her perfect partner.

  Five minutes of deep breathing later, the fur was gone, and her teeth were back to normal, but Franny was rattled and needed to go home. Standing up slowly, opening the door and walking to the large mirror above the sinks, Franny checked to make sure her clothes weren’t ripped, and none of her makeup was smudged. In her reflection, she saw a small woman with a look of pure anxiety on her face. Yep, she definitely needed to go home, get into bed, turn on a meditation video and nap until her nerves returned to normal.

  When she walked out of the bathroom, it was to see Ed sitting at a table nearby, looking anxiously at the door she had just exited. “Thank God! I was so worried. Are you okay? Was it something I said?” he asked, holding both his drink and hers in his hands. “I wasn’t sure if you still wanted a drink, but I got you a soy mocha chocolate chip Frappuccino with almond milk, whipped cream,” he said, handing her the tall, frosty drink. Franny took a sip and relished the feeling of the sugar on her tongue, the way the chocolate flavor soothed her nerves. It was true what they said in Harry Potter—chocolate really was the best thing for a shock, or in her case, a near-shift.

  “I’m okay,” Franny breathed after taking a few more sips while Ed stood anxiously in front of her. “But I think I need to go home. Can we go home now?”

  ---

  Ed and Franny sat for a few minutes in his car after he had parked at the end of her driveway. Franny had been mostly silent during the ride back from Stanford, unsure what to say to explain her sudden disappearance into the restroom. She couldn’t very well tell Ed she had nearly shifted, but she also didn’t want to lie to him. So, she stayed quiet, which seemed the best compromise for the time being. But now that they were parked and her front door was in sight, and the date was obviously at an end, Franny knew she needed to say something to Ed, if only so that look of anxiety and doubt that was wrinkling his brow and making him frown would go away. Ed’s face was way too good-looking for a frown like that.

  “I’m sorry,” Franny said, at the same time as Ed. They giggled nervously, but then Ed said, “You go first,” and Franny continued. “Sometimes I get…anxious, for no reason, and then I have to go and take some deep breaths and sort of come back to Earth before re-entering the human race. I’m not really sure what sparked it today, but I’m sorry for worrying you.”

  “It’s okay, Franny. I understand. Other than the brief panic attack, did you…did you have a nice time?” Ed asked, and Franny couldn’t miss the hopefulness in his eyes. He had planned every part of their date, from the bookstore to the walk around campus to the café, and she could see in his eyes how important it was that she’d had a good time not just on the date, but with him.

  “Yes. Yes, I did. Thank you for a wonderful day, Ed.” Franny leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. She wished she had the guts to reach over with her hand and turn Ed’s face to hers, and planting a kiss fully on his mouth, but after the day she’d had, her gumption was all tapped out.

  “Perhaps we can do it again sometime?” Ed said, looking at Franny intently.

  “Sure, I’d like that.”

  But despite how much fun she’d had with Ed, how nice and kind and honest he was, as Franny exited his car and made her way up the driveway and into her house, she knew she wouldn’t be seeing him again. She wasn’t ready for this, for dating, especially dating a human. She had enough on her plate with Rose, her job, yoga. She didn’t have time for a man. Yes, it was better that she and Ed break it off now before they got hurt. That’s what Franny told herself as she avoided the library for the next two weeks, sending Rose in with a list of books to get her while she waited in the car. It was better that way.

  ---

  Franny was at home two weeks later, reading on the couch and enjoying a rare day off from teaching, when a knock sounded at her door. As she padded to the peephole to see who it was, anxiety started to swirl in her stomach. That swirl became a storm when she saw who it was. Ed. And in his arms were what looked like mocha chocolate chip Frappuccino and the newest hardcover by Amanda Bouchet. Dammit, why did he have to be so perfect?

  Franny opened the door, hoping she didn’t look too frumpy in her old University of Arizona sweatpants and “Read Romance or GTFO” t-shirt.

  “Hi,” she said,
eyeing Ed. If possible, he looked even better than he had the last time she’d seen him. His hair had grown out a bit and now fell into his eyes, though she could see the anxiety clear in his baby blues.

  “Hey! So, I haven’t seen you for a few weeks, and then the other day Rose told me you’d be home and asked me to come over and…now I’m realizing I’ve been set up by a twelve-year-old,” Ed said, eyeing the living room behind Franny. Various mugs and a half-eaten bowl of ramen sat on the coffee table, and two books were lying open on the couch.

  Franny sighed and gestured for Ed to come in. “I swear, that kid is twelve going on twenty-five. She’s been trying to run my social life since she could talk,” Franny said.

  “Yeah, well, I’m glad she set us up. I’ve really missed you. I get the sense that you’ve been avoiding me?” Ed asked, handing Franny the book and coffee. She thanked him and gestured for him to sit in the comfy chair near the couch.

  Franny sat down and toyed with fibbing, but decided the truth was the best course of action. If worst came to worst, Ed would run out of the house screaming, “she’s a wolf! She’s a wolf!” Best-case scenario, they kissed and made up. Or had sex and made up. Or both. After eight years of no sex, Franny wasn’t picky.

  “Ed, I’m a werewolf. My last relationship, with Rose’s dad, ended when he decided he couldn’t handle having two wolf women in the family. Rose is a werewolf, too, you see. And our date was amazing, but after that panic attack, I got scared and thought that maybe it was too soon for me to date. But I don’t think that’s the case. I really like you, and I would like to try dating you, but I understand if you don’t want to be with someone like me. It’s a lot to handle.”

  Franny took a sip of her coffee drink, relishing as the cold sweetness hit her tongue. She kept sipping, ignoring the brain freeze the frozen coffee was giving her and waited anxiously for Ed to respond. But she didn’t have long to wait. After a minute of pondering, Ed leaned in and said, “Okay. Let’s date.”