Unexpected Baby

by Ford, Mia

  I kiss him hard as I roll my hips, finally plunging him inside of me, letting out a scream of pleasure as I do. The air strips from my lungs, the sound of our bodies clapping together with each thrust fills the room, and a tingling heat trickles all the way through me. My veins fizz, my tummy tingles, I can feel myself about to explode. Luckily, I’m the one in control here. So, I can bury him in deep and make sure that every thrust feels amazing.

  The pleasure builds quickly. I don’t think it actually left me before, so as it buzzes and throbs, I tip my head backwards and embrace it, loving the feeling as it hits me hard, almost knocking me off his lap. I grip so hard on to Wesley’s shoulders that I’m sure my nails must be digging in to his skin, but I can’t stop. I need that support.

  We come together. Both of us shatter through the pleasure at exactly the same time, kissing and crying out one another’s names as we do. It almost brings tears to my eyes because it’s just so wonderful, and I never want it to end. Here, with Wesley, when there aren’t any outside complications surrounding us, it’s a perfect little bubble where I can just be happy. Happier than I have ever been before.

  “Wow.” We collapse breathlessly on the couch next to one another. “That was amazing.”

  “Don’t do anything rash because of that man, because he wasn’t good to you before. I don’t like the way that he treated you and I don’t want you to get fooled by him and hurt once more. It will crush Maddie.”

  Jessica’s words pop in to my head as if from nowhere, pouring a tub of ice cold water all over me. The post orgasmic bliss subsides and leaves me freezing and a little ashamed of what I’ve done.

  “Just don’t fall for him, Zoe, that’s all I ask of you. Do whatever you need to, you know that I will support you through anything, but a second chance will be a disaster. They always are.”

  I glance at Wesley, who clearly isn’t struggling with the same sorts of things that I am. He looks happy and at peace. He doesn’t seem to see any issues with second chances, and I know that he doesn’t want to crush Maddie. But what if it happens anyway? Neither of us will want to hurt Maddie, but what happens if we do?

  Wesley wraps his arms around me, and I can sense him falling asleep without any issues. But that just makes it even harder for me. The fear of over complicating life and staying here for the wrong reasons is hard. I know that Jessica wouldn’t say anything to hurt me. I can trust her with my whole life, and that’s why I thought that I would follow her advice when I agreed to no second chances… but I got caught up and I let it happen anyway.

  I need to get away, I think desperately to myself. I need to speak to my best friend. I need her help.

  I feel awful as I slide out from underneath Wesley’s arm, but I just need some space. We both do. If we’re going to get involved with one another with Maddie in the picture too, we need to move at a slow and smart pace. We need to be absolutely certain that we can last forever because we can’t give our daughter the full family unit for a while, just to take it away again. We can’t just have sex and expect everything to go right from there.

  Sorry, Wesley, I think sadly as I creep away. But I’m doing this for us. I’m thinking long term…

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Wesley

  “Zoe?” I call out while reaching my hand across the bed. “Zoe, where are you?”

  I’m still half asleep, living in the wonderful dream where she still has her arms wrapped around me, her lips on mine, our hearts beating together in unison… and since the other side of the bed is ice cold as if no one has been there all night long, I don’t want to wake up. I don’t want reality to hit.

  “Zoe?” but I have to. I have to let reality in because it might involve Maddie. “Is something going on?”

  But all that greets me is a thick and heavy silence. It only takes me a couple of moments to glance around the room to realize that her clothes have gone too. I can sense that she’s gone completely, that my apartment is back to being just me within it, but I still need to check to be certain. But yep, she’s definitely gone. Every single room in my home is hauntingly empty, making me desperately yearn for human contact. Well, contact from her anyway.

  “Shit.” I rake my fingers through my hair and shake my head. “What happened? What did I do wrong?”

  My mind spins over everything that happened last night, but as far as I’m concerned it was amazing. The best night ever. I felt like myself again, revitalized, like the last five years of loneliness just melted away. And in the heat of the moment, it seemed like Zoe felt the same way too. I could feel her warming up to me and giving herself over to me. It seemed like I had given her another reason to stay… but now she’s gone.

  I grab my cell phone, wondering if I should just call her or not, but I’m not too sure. I don’t know if she’s going to want to talk to me. I’m torn between wanting to make sure that we communicate properly and wanting to give her the space that she needs to make up her own mind. I can’t force her in to anything she doesn’t want.

  “Fuck, just leave it,” I growl at myself. “Call her later. Give her some time. Don’t be pushy and a dickhead.”

  I glance around my apartment, wondering how the hell I’m supposed to fill the time while I wait for that to happen. If I am already buzzing and on edge, then time isn’t going to help that at all. I don’t know how the hell I managed to last five whole fucking years without knowing what was going on with Zoe and now I can’t even last five minutes. My feelings weren’t less for her back then. Confused, maybe, all mixed up in the lies coming from Court and Hannah, but definitely not less. I wonder if I could push everything to the back of my mind like I did back then. It would certainly make it easier right now, but they are too much. Completely consuming me.

  “Maddie.” She’s the answer. She’s my link. I want to check in on my daughter anyway, to see how she’s doing, to check that she had an amazing time at the sleep over. And it’s a good way for me to see Zoe as well. I just want to look at her, to know that I haven’t hurt her. “Yes, I’m going to Brad’s place now.”

  I get dressed in a hurry and grab my keys before stalking off to Brad’s place. My heart pounds as I walk, my feet move as quickly as they can go. I try my hardest to keep my expression in check as I move. The last thing I want to do is let the rest of the world see that I’m completely freaking out here.

  I knock hard, loudly, wondering if there is still chaos going on inside. It’s a massive house. I guess our parents needed a big place with six young boys to look after, and they had the money made from their very successful company, so chaos won’t be too much trouble in there. But I need them to hear me.

  As the door swings open, I’m struck by the quiet. It definitely doesn’t sound like there are lots of children in there. Brad seems to sense the panic on my face no matter how much I try to hide them.

  “Maddie isn’t here anymore,” he tells me. “Zoe came for her earlier. But she had a really good time. I don’t think she wanted to leave actually.” He laughs. “She definitely wants to come and stay over again.”

  “Oh good.” I nod slowly. “I’m glad that she enjoyed herself. I knew that she would though.”

  “You look like you have a million and one questions in your mind. What’s going on, Wesley?”

  I don’t want to ask this, it makes me seem like a complete and utter asshole, and it will only spark the interest of my brother who wants to know everything that’s going on, but I need to. I don’t have a choice.

  “How did Zoe seem when she came here? Was she okay? Did she seem… I don’t know, distressed?”

  “She was absolutely fine. Very happy. Laughing and joking around. I think that she was glad to have Maddie back with her for sure, but she was in a good place. I think that the party was good for her.”

  “Right, sure.” That doesn’t tell me what I need to know. Not that Brad can tell me anything. The only person who will be able to answer my question is the one person who I’m scared to speak to. �
�Okay.”

  “Has something happened? You guys haven’t fallen out, have you? Because I know that your situation is complicated, but you and her need to find a way to be okay for Maddie’s sake?”

  “It isn’t as straight forward as that,” I admit. “It’s all a bit messy to be honest.”

  Brad leans against the door frame and looks at me. “How is it messy? Can I help you at all?” I don’t know what to say so I don’t say anything. “Wesley, you know that I have been through shit myself. I can help. Do you have feelings for Zoe? I know that this is something we discussed before and you didn’t say a lot, but you can now if you want to. Because if you do have feelings for her, then you need to go get her.”

  I’m in love with her, I realize with a sucker punch. I don’t think… I am. I know I am.

  I have always known it, but this is the one time that I have fully embraced it. I do love Zoe, last night was sheer evidence of that, it reminded me how good we are together. I won’t ever find anyone like her for a reason… because she is ‘the one’, the only one for me. Me and her are meant to be. I just need her to see that too.

  “Yes,” I rasp out. “I do have feelings for her.” I don’t want to tell him the extent of them because I think that Zoe should be the first one to know. “I do and I’m scared of messing everything up.”

  “Wesley, you only have one life,” Brad replies firmly. “And if this is what you want, then you need to try.”

  “But what if it messes everything up? What if it pushes her away from me?”

  “You will figure it out.” He rests his hands on my shoulders. “You guys are both adult enough to put Maddie first if it doesn’t work out, but you don’t want to have regrets. You don’t want to wonder what if.”

  He is only telling me everything that I already know. This is what I have already decided, but I haven’t followed through on it yet. For some reason, I haven’t followed my own advice. I nod along, agreeing with him, but not quite sure where to start. If I don’t try to find out where her head is at though, it will be torture forever.

  She must have some feelings for me, mustn’t she? She wouldn’t have sex with me for no reason, so there is some hope. Plus, there was a whole heap of romantic energy between us all evening long.

  “Communicate,” Brad tells me seriously. “That’s a big mistake in relationships. Especially when things are all fresh and you’re trying to figure things out. You need to communicate with one another.”

  Communicate. Brad is basically telling me that stepping back and doing nothing isn’t the best thing to do which is actually music to my ears. I don’t want to do nothing. I want to see her right away. When she headed to New York, I gave her space. I sat back and did nothing and that was a mistake. I need to do everything differently this time around because I can’t go another five years without having the love of my life.

  I nod at Brad and thank him for his advice before running towards the hotel. And this time, I do run. I don’t hold anything back; I race at the speed of light letting my face do whatever the hell it wants. This step is a huge and important one, and it’s about me and Zoe. Not the rest of the world.

  It doesn’t take me long to get to the hotel, but it takes me much longer to find out what room Zoe is staying in. The woman at the reception desk doesn’t seem keen to tell the slightly crazed man who is completely out of breath where a woman is staying who isn’t a member of his family. Luckily, once I calm down a bit, I manage to find that deep down charm, and I talk her around, telling her a little bit of my story. The romance of it gets to her. She’s nearly filled with tears by the end of it and she wishes me luck as she tells me where to go.

  I’m going to need that luck, all of it because this is everything to me.

  But it all seems to be a waste of time. I get to the door and bang upon it, but no one answers. I press my ear up against the door, but I don’t think she’s ignoring me. I don’t think she’s here. Maddie certainly isn’t because I would be able to hear her adorable cute little voice. She doesn’t spend a lot of her time in silence. So, I have to come to the conclusion that the knocking isn’t going to get me anywhere.

  She can’t be back in New York; I tell myself before I can really panic. She hasn’t checked out yet.

  I don’t think that Zoe would do that again anyway, even if I have done something to upset her. She wouldn’t run off and take my daughter away from me. Not without making a plan with me. She’s always been the more grown up one of us both, so I need to calm the hell down.

  I should go. Come back later, but I don’t think I can. I don’t know what else I would do. Right now, this is the only thing that I need to do. There isn’t anything else in the world that needs my attention and I really won’t be distracted by anything. I don’t have any choice. However long it’s going to take, I need to take a seat and wait for her. I need to have a conversation with Zoe the moment that she returns.

  I slide to the floor and rest my head back against the door, trying to use this time wisely by planning what I’m going to say when I finally see Zoe again. I want my words to be right. I need my declaration of love to be absolutely perfect when I finally get it out there. I want her to know how much she means to me.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Zoe

  “What time is the plane coming?” Maddie asks me while bouncing up and down by my side. “I can’t wait.”

  “It won’t be long.” I squeeze her hand reassuringly. “I promise you. Not much longer. It’s on its way.”

  This airport holds a lot of my emotions. I feel like every time I have been here; it’s been a dramatic time of my life. Once, when I was leaving and dropping all of my drama off. Then again when I came back. At the time, I thought that I was picking all of my shoulder weight back up again, but now I think that I was wrong. I was just nervous, that was all, worried about how things were going to turn out. As soon as it became okay again, I was okay too, and I have been ever since then. Until today when I’m back at the airport with more emotions on me.

  Last night was so good, I tell myself as again, I try to figure out what my next move is. But it’s scary.

  Thankfully, today I will work out if I want to follow myself in to that fear or not, if I’m brave enough to follow my heart, or if I need to follow my head instead. My best friend has decided to take some time out of her busy schedule to come and visit me here, to help me with my decision. Jessica called me this morning, as soon as I picked up Maddie, and she told me that she was at the airport. I like the way that she has left me with no choice because she can sense how much I need her. I wouldn’t have told her not to come anyway. I need her.

  I’m going to have to confess everything though, of course. All the parts of the story that are embarrassing and involve me not listening to her advice at all. She will probably kick my ass, but at least she won’t judge me. Of that I can be truly grateful. This is the exact reason why we have always remained friends… because we are there for one another in a way that I haven’t found with other women. Hannah has made me wary.

  “Is that her?” Maddie slips her hands away from mine and she runs off. I immediately try to grab her just in case this is someone else, but she’s a slippery little snake and she gets away. Thankfully, it is Jessica’s arms she jumps in to. My best friend hugs her as if she’s her own child, which causes a wave of emotions to rush through me. Without even knowing that it’s coming, a tsunami of tears burst through my eyes. My face is soaking before I can properly gather myself up. Bringing Jessica in to this part of my life is just too much. Nothing is separate anymore; it’s all come crashing in and I don’t know how I’m supposed to cope with it all.

  “Oh, Zoe.” Maddie and Jessica both come to hug me, to give me some much needed support. “What’s happening? I knew that you needed me, but I didn’t know that things were this bad for you. Oh my God.”

  I want to let everything out right away, I want to tell Jessica everything, so that she can put me on the straight and
narrow. But I’m too choked up and emotional. I’m a sobbing freaking mess.

  “Come on. There is a coffee shop over there with a little play area. Let’s take a minute.”

  I allow Jessica to take me away from the crowds of people who are probably staring at me like I’m a freak and I take a seat. I do my best to wipe away my tears as Jessica gets us both drinks and Maddie jumps over to the play area to make a group of friends. It’s amazing how easy it is for children. They don’t even need to worry about trust. They don’t even need to worry about having something in common, they only need to be in the same place at the same time. It was the same at Brad’s party. Maddie just found a way to fit in. She’s so lucky.

  “Right.” Jessica puts the steamy mug down in front of me and gives me a look. “What’s going on?”

  “It’s Wesley,” I admit miserably, not bothering to beat around the bush. “I have made a mess of things again.”

  “I thought as much. I take it that you haven’t exactly been following my advice then.”

  “I have been! At first, I was. I have been making things only about Maddie, but things have changed. Last night, I ended up caving and me and him ended up in bed together.”

  She sucks in a breath but doesn’t yell at me like I was expecting her too. “How was it?”

  “Er, what? Spending the night with him? Or everything leading up until that point?”

  “Both.” She shrugs. “Maddie is having a good time. We can be here for as long as you want.”