Journey of the Heart

by Marjorie Farrell

  Cait watched Gabe make his way across the floor and was very conscious of the fact that he had danced with every woman in the room at least once and now Louise Taylor for the second time this evening. Every woman, that is, except Caitlin Burke. He had done a very good job of avoiding her. She and Sadie stood there watching Gabe and then Juan Chavez leading their new partners onto the floor for a schottische, each lost in a bittersweet moment of wanting another dance with a man who was not for her.

  Chapter Twenty

  Sunday morning after the dance, Gabe lay in his cot. Sunday’s work always started later, for the Burkes often went to mass at the little Spanish church near El Morro. Or at least Michael and his daughter, for as Mrs. Burke had told Gabe on his first Sunday there, her Protestant soul would not allow her to attend too many masses.

  He pictured Miss Cait dressed in her Sunday best, that aster blue dress that brought out the color of her eyes, and groaned as he felt himself becoming aroused. Damn. It had been very hard to keep away from her last night. He had been aware of her the whole evening: whom she was dancing with, laughing with, even flirting with. He had wanted a waltz with her, wanted to have his arms around her again, to feel the sweet curve of her waist under his hand. But what was the point of encouraging such feelings when she would be leaving in a few weeks’ time? So he had exercised a firm control over himself. Not, of course, he thought, with an ironic laugh, that she would have noticed or cared that he was avoiding her.

  He had been almost happy by the distraction Sadie had provided him by dancing with Chavez. Lord, his sister was something, he thought with a smile as he sat up and ran his hand through his hair. Well, since a part of him was already awake and up, he thought ruefully, he may as well get up. After peeing and splashing himself down with lukewarm water from the rain barrel as he always did on Sunday, his desire had subsided. He was just coming in from the back door of the barn toweling his face and hair, shirtless and his jeans unbuttoned at the waist when he almost ran right into Miss Caitlin Burke.

  “Why, uh, Miss Cait. I was just washing up. I thought you and your father were off to church?” He was standing there, jabbering like an idiot, thought Gabe.

  “I am sorry I disturbed you, Mr. Hart. I didn’t think anyone would be up yet. Da left a half hour ago by himself. I was too tired after last night to go with him. I just came to see how Snowflake is doing.” Cait was able to keep her voice calm and even but she couldn’t help the slight flush of embarrassment that rose from her neck to her face.

  She had seen men shirtless before, of course. Her Da for one. Jake, when he was pounding at fence posts. But this was different, more intimate, because Gabe Hart had obviously just come in from his Sunday washup. He had silvery-blond hair on his chest, she realized, which ran down his flat stomach to the open buttons of his denims. He was built so long and lean, she thought, and blushed deeper as she realized where her thoughts were taking her.

  “I’ll just go take a look at Snowflake’s hock, shall I?” she said brightly, as though they were exchanging polite words in someone’s parlor.

  Gabe smiled as he watched her scurry off. He finished toweling himself dry and put on his old work shirt that he left hanging in the tack room. He tucked it into his jeans and buttoning up the last button, sauntered over to Snowflake’s stall thanking God that Miss Caitlin Burke had not wandered in earlier. A good-morning piss and a wash calmed a man down considerably.

  He leaned over the stall door and watched her unwrap the mare’s bandage. She ran her hand down Snowflake’s leg, a look of satisfaction on her face.

  “The arnica wrap seems to have brought the swelling down quickly, Miss Cait,” said Gabe.

  “Yes. Da has always sworn by it for strains and bruises, Mr. Hart. You’ve done a good job of taking care of her.”

  “You can leave her leg unwrapped. I’m going to put on a fresh-soaked bandage today.”

  Gabe opened the stall door and Caitlin came out. He was standing in front of her, unconsciously blocking her way to the barn door and they stood there for a moment each very aware of the other’s presence.

  “I was surprised to see you up after all that dancing, Miss Cait,” said Gabe, finally breaking the silence. “You were one of the most popular young ladies there,” he added with a smile, “dancing with everyone in the room.” It was an automatic compliment, given just to break the tension hanging between them.

  “Not everyone, Mr. Hart. You never asked me to dance.” Cait said it without thinking and now it was Gabe who flushed red with embarrassment. What was he supposed to say? That he had avoided her on purpose because she was too tempting? “Uh, every time I was going to speak to you, it seemed like someone else had got there first,” he replied lamely. It wasn’t true and both of them knew it. But Cait was too appalled by her own forwardness to do anything but smile brightly and say: “Then it is too bad we were both disappointed, Mr. Hart. Excuse me, but I must get back to help with breakfast.”

  Gabe backed out of the way and she was gone out the door before he had a chance to say good-bye. Then what she had actually said sunk in and he stood there grinning at the realization that Caitlin Burke had noticed the fact that he hadn’t danced with her and had, it seemed, been disappointed. Not that it meant much, he told himself, his grin fading. She was still engaged to her Henry. She’d forget a few missed dances with Gabe Hart very quickly.

  * * * *

  After breakfast, Sadie followed her brother out to the corral.

  “Can I watch you with the colts, Gabe?” she asked.

  “I don’t work them on Sunday, Sadie. We take it as a day of rest and only do the necessary chores. But I am going to work with Sky this morning,” he added. “I don’t like to leave off with him even for a day.”

  Night Sky was such a beautiful animal that it would be a shame if Gabe were not successful, thought Sadie as she watched her brother put the horse through his paces on the lunge line. She had seen many a piebald and paint in her time but none of them could compare with Sky’s spotted coat. He moved fluidly, too, she thought as she admired his canter. The only thing about him that might be considered less than beautiful was his tail and mane, for all the Appaloosas had this same feature. But then, she realized, as she continued to watch, you kind of got used to the look. It fit, somehow, though she couldn’t say why.

  Gave had brought out the old saddle blanket and brought Sky over to him. The horse would now allow Gabe to rub him down all over, but whenever Gabe lingered near his back or tried to leave his arm there, Sky would give a few little crow-hops away from him.

  “You know, Gabe,” Sadie said after he’d released the horse into the pasture and came over to the fence, “I can almost understand Cait’s impatience. He is such a beautiful animal and his gaits are just about perfect. I was itching to ride him myself, just watching you.”

  “Don’t think I don’t know how you felt, Sadie,” her brother said with a rueful grin. “Sometimes I have to work real hard to keep myself from leading him over to the fence and slipping on. I’ve come to love that horse, you know,” he added softly. “That’s what patience and holding yourself back leads to, most times: love. But if I’m successful, I lose him when Miss Burke goes back east,” he added with a sigh.

  “And if you are not successful?”

  “Wal, like most ranchers, Mr. Burke can’t have a useless animal around,” Gabe drawled. “But if it comes to that, I’ll offer to buy him.”

  “A horse you can’t ride!”

  “He’s too fine an animal to destroy, Sadie. And it would give me more time to work with him.”

  “Then I don’t know whether to wish you luck or not, Gabe,” said Sadie with a wry grin.

  * * * *

  Michael Burke had not returned by dinnertime, although that did not seem to worry his wife too much, thought Gabe as they all sat down for a roast chicken and fresh vegetables from the garden. “Michael told me we should go ahead if he wasn’t back,” Elizabeth explained as she served them. “
He was planning to ride up to Eduardo’s camp after mass, just to check on things. Your meeting Chavez up there made him a little nervous,” she added, looking over at Sadie. Sadie blushed and felt somehow responsible, though she couldn’t have explained why, had anyone asked her. She certainly wasn’t responsible for meeting Juan Chavez. Nor for his following her down. She had agreed to dance with him, but one waltz was hardly something to feel guilty about, she told herself.

  Two hours after dinner, when Michael still hadn’t returned, Elizabeth went over to the bunkhouse to find Gabe. He was sitting on the steps, braiding the reins of a bridle.

  “Gabe, I hate to disturb you, for this is usually your time off, but I’m beginning to get worried about Mr. Burke. He said he might miss dinner, but I didn’t expect him to take this long.”

  Gabe looked up at the sun. “I reckon it is almost three o’clock, Mrs. Burke. He might just be having a cup of coffee with Eduardo. And you know how Eduardo loves to talk,” he added with a smile. “He’s up there by himself for days and whenever I go up with supplies he talks my ear off.”

  “I suppose you could be right,” admitted Elizabeth. “I guess I wouldn’t be worried if it weren’t for Chavez being seen around.”

  “No need to apologize for worrying, ma’am. I tell you what,” said Gabe, putting the bridle down, “why don’t I just saddle up Buck and ride out toward the mountains. I’m sure I’ll meet Mr. Burke before I get to the foothills,” he added reassuringly.

  “Thank you, Gabe. I hate to be so fidgety, but I don’t like thinking of Michael out there alone.”

  Gabe was actually a little worried himself the farther he rode. He’d expected to see Michael before the foothills, as he’d told Elizabeth, but it wasn’t until he started climbing that he saw his employer coming down the trail toward him. He was going slowly and at first Gabe wondered if another horse had gone lame. But Patch wasn’t limping and then Gabe noticed what was tied behind Michael’s saddle.

  He spurred his paint and pulled up in front of Michael.

  “Who is it?” he asked, gesturing at the oilcloth-wrapped body slung over Patch.

  “Eduardo,” Michael replied, pain and anger in his voice.

  “An accident?” Gabe asked, not very hopefully.

  “Only if a man can collect two bullets in the chest and one in the leg by accident,” Michael said bitterly.

  Gabe rested his hand on Eduardo’s body and cursed eloquently and fluently.

  “Yes, boyo, that’s exactly what I’ve been thinkin’.”

  “Goddamn Mackie and his hired killers! His ‘wolf.’ It must have been Chavez. He was up here skulking around, maybe even intending to kill Eduardo last week when Sadie appeared.” Gabe’s voice was shaking with fury and fear. His sister had probably just missed being a victim herself and the man had the balls to waltz with her on Saturday!

  “We don’t know that for certain, Gabe,” said Michael. “That it was one of Mackie’s men, I am sure, but we have no way of knowing which one,” he added with real regret. “For if we did, by God, I’d kill him with my own bare hands. Eduardo has worked for me for sixteen years. Dia, and I’ll have to tell his wife and children.”

  They rode on in silence and Gabe remembered his first meeting with Eduardo when he’d ridden into the sheepherder’s camp.

  “Did he get a chance to defend himself, Mr. Burke?”

  “His shotgun was lying next to him, but it hadn’t been fired. I’d guess they came up on him suddenly and it was over quickly, thank Christ.”

  They parted at the road and Gabe watched Michael for a few minutes before he turned his horse toward the ranch. He met Elizabeth halfway down the drive.

  “I couldn’t stand the waiting,” she explained. “You didn’t find him then?” she added, an agonized look on her face. Without thinking, Gabe laid his hand on her shoulder to reassure her. “I found him, Mrs. Burke, and he is all right.”

  He could feel the tension drain out of her. “But where is he then?”

  “Mr. Burke is all right, but I have bad news. Eduardo has been killed.”

  “Oh, no,” cried Elizabeth. “He has been with us for years. Who could have wanted to hurt him?”

  Gabe just looked at her.

  “Mackie, of course,” she said with heavy irony. “Mr. Burke and I are sure of it.”

  “Well, this time he has gone too far. He’s finally hurt someone and revealed himself as the criminal he is,” said Elizabeth passionately.

  “I don’t know as there is any proof, ma’am,” Gabe cautioned her.

  “Proof! His hired animal was out there just last week. It was Chavez,” she said with a shudder. “I knew I was right to fear him.”

  Chapter Twenty-one

  Michael didn’t get back until after dark and they all gathered around the table while he attacked the supper Elizabeth had saved for him. “ ‘Twas a long day without anything in my belly, a ghra,” he said. “Thank you for saving something for me.”

  “What happened, Da?” Caitlin asked anxiously.

  “The dog came running to meet me, barking like crazy, so I knew something was wrong right away. I thought maybe Eduardo had had an accident. I hoped it was only that.”

  “But why didn’t Chino warn Eduardo? He might have escaped them.”

  “My guess is that he was up with the sheep, Cait. And even if he had warned him, I doubt Eduardo would have left the flock. He would have stood his ground. No, I think they came on him so quickly that he didn’t even have time to fire his gun.” Michael took a sip of coffee and was silent for a minute. “ ‘Twas one of the hardest things I’ve done, bringing Eduardo to Elena’s house. He was a good man and a good friend to me.” Cait could see tears in her father’s eyes. “Damn Mackie and his men to hell,” he cursed softly. “Dia, but maybe I should have just given in months ago,” he added. “Eduardo would still be alive.”

  “You made the right choice, Michael,” said Elizabeth, reaching across the table and taking his hand in hers. “Eduardo made a choice, too. He knew it was dangerous, but he stayed with us.”

  “At least you can end it now, Da,” said Cait. “You have proof you can take to the sheriff.”

  “What proof, Cait?” responded Michael wearily.

  “Why, Eduardo was murdered, Da! You know who did it.”

  “And who would that be?”

  “Why, Juan Chavez, Da. He was up there, probably to kill Eduardo the day Sadie came along.”

  “The sheriff will have to do something, Michael,” Elizabeth added in agreement with her daughter.

  “I will go to town first thing in the morning, Elizabeth. I will tell him Eduardo was murdered. I’ll even tell him that Chavez was up there last week. But if he asks me, and he will, I’ll have to tell him that half my sheep were run off too. And he’ll most likely conclude that it was common rustling and that Eduardo died defending the flock.”

  “But, Da, it is so clear,” Cait protested.

  “I am sure as my name is Michael Joseph Burke that Mackie is responsible for this, Caitlin,” said Michael grimly. “But what proof do I have, even for an honest sheriff? Chavez, or whoever it was, was hardly going to leave a polite note, admitting it. No, whoever did it was very smart to run off the sheep.”

  “I can’t believe we can’t do anything,” Cait protested.

  “We can try to push the sheriff to investigate. And we can decide, right here and now, if we want to give in,” added Michael, looking at his wife and daughter and then over at Gabe.

  “Sell the ranch, Da!”

  “It was a good man they murdered, Cait. I’d sell if you wanted me to, Elizabeth, to prevent more bloodshed.” He looked over at his wife and Cait could see the pain in his eyes. They had worked so hard for what they had. She couldn’t bear the thought of them losing it.

  “We’d have the horses and the sheep, a ghra,” added Michael.

  “But no land, Michael. Where would we go? No, this is our home and I will not have a bully like Mackie drive
us off it,” Elizabeth replied in a voice shaking with grief and anger.

  “This could be his last attempt to scare us off,” Michael speculated hopefully. “Even Mackie would have a hard time explaining an injury to me or my family.” He hesitated. “Cait, what do you say?”

  “I say we stay, Da,” she answered fiercely.

  “Gabe? I could well understand if ye wanted to change your mind and leave and I’d not blame you one bit. If he pushes me any further it will come to fighting, for I am not going to take any more from him and his hired dogs,” Michael added.

  “I’m in, Mr. Burke,” said Gabe quietly. “I’m tired of wandering. I want to settle down here. As long as you need a wrangler, I’m yours.”

  “As long as I’ve got horses, I’ll need you, Gabe,” Michael answered with a grateful smile. “Well, Miss Sarah Ellen, we’d better put you on the next stage back to Texas.”

  “Oh, no, Mr. Burke. Unless I am a burden as a guest, I want to stay till this is all settled. I can’t leave now, not knowing what might happen to Gabe,” she added.

  “You are welcome here as long as you like,” said Elizabeth. “We just don’t want you to be in any danger.”

  “I’m not afraid, Mrs. Burke.”

  “Well, then, that’s settled,” said Michael. “And a good thing it is and a relief to me, to know that you’ll be safe back east, Cait, in just a few weeks.”

  “Yes,” said Elizabeth, giving her daughter a quick hug. “I have been dreading your leaving, but now I am relieved you will be away from all of this.”

  Cait had been so caught up in her determination that her family not give in to Mackie, she had actually forgotten that she herself was leaving anyway. That in less than three weeks she’d be on a train to Philadelphia with Henry. As she helped her mother with the dishes, she realized that Sadie and Gabe, two strangers, would be here with her parents, taking on a fight that did not really belong to them while she was teaching young women the finer points of English literature. All at once it seemed so unimportant what interpretation one placed on Jane’s decision to return to Mr. Rochester, compared to the life and death reality that she would be leaving behind.