Drawing the Line

by KD Williamson

  Rick flailed backward in surprise.

  Rebecca grabbed his shirt to keep him upright.

  He looked down at her and blinked. “Can you get me an Uber?”

  She shook her head. “No, I got you.”

  “Becca, you can’t take me home. She’s not ready to—”

  “I know that. You’re comin’ home with me.” She wrapped an arm around his torso again. Doing this for him wasn’t much, but the small things mattered. Hell, everything mattered. Rick deserved so much more from her. She had to try to be there for him. This was the least she could do.

  Chapter 6

  Despite everything, Dani walked down the corridor of the pediatric oncology wing with positivity perched on her shoulders. Pre-rounds were her favorite part of the day. As a senior resident, she usually had a first year and med student along, so Dani savored the mornings she was able to do it alone while they did their own thing. It wasn’t hard to put a smile on her face as she entered her first room. “How are we doing this morning, Lola?”

  The eleven-year-old girl in question grunted and twisted the cell phone in her hands this way and that. A few seconds later, she sighed, pursed her lips, and lifted big green eyes to meet Dani’s gaze. “Huh?”

  Dani continued to grin. “How are you?”

  “Bald and bored. Same as yesterday.” She sassed, but there was nothing malicious in her tone. Lola dropped the cell phone onto her lap.

  “I don’t know any magic tricks and my jokes suck.”

  Lola grinned. “They do. They really do.”

  “Lola! That’s rude.” Paul, Lola’s father, put his magazine down and pushed himself up from the bedside chair.

  “No, it’s not, Dad.” Lola rolled her eyes. “Look, she’s smiling.”

  Dani turned and slightly extended her smile to him. “Morning, Mr. Green.”

  “Same to you, Dr. Russell. I’m assuming we’re still on track to start the last cycle of chemo in two weeks?”

  “Yes, there have been no complications from surgery. She’s healing well.”

  “You sure we can’t do it early?” Lola asked with a little whine in her voice.

  “Nope, sorry.”

  Lola huffed. Paul reached for his phone. But his daughter slapped his hand away.

  “You have your own phone.”

  As always, these two were entertaining to watch. Dani was far from bored.

  “It’s charging and yours is bigger.” Lola picked the phone up and flipped it over. “You have a text from Uncle Rob…” Her voice trailed off as she stared at it. “Eww, Dad! He says he’s still waiting for new pictures of my hot doctor! Creepy much?”

  Dani couldn’t decide if she was more disgusted or shocked. She’d go with a combination of the two. She glanced at Lola briefly, and they both turned their gaze toward Paul.

  He blinked at them both owlishly. “Who?”

  “Uncle Rob!”

  “I don’t know who that—”

  “Your brother? My uncle?” Lola looked at her father as if he had something extra growing out of his head.

  Paul laughed nervously. “Oh, you mean Bobby.” He turned toward Dani then rolled his eyes and did this weird shimmy with his shoulders that looked more like a seizure than anything. “Rob. Nobody calls him Rob. I got a little confused.”

  “I call him Rob all the time,” Lola screeched. “I wonder if Mom will know who Uncle Rob is?” The last part was said teasingly.

  He leaned a little closer to Dani. In reaction, Dani took a step away.

  “It’s the painkillers,” Paul whispered.

  “I can hear you, Dad, and I’m not taking anything for the pain anymore. Am I, Dr. Russell?”

  “No, you’re not.” Dani stared at Paul. His face turned bright red.

  Paul let out a high-pitched chuckle. Moving quickly, he snatched his phone from his daughter’s hand.

  Dani continued to meet his gaze. In the past couple minutes, she had gone from shocked and disgusted to somewhat amused. This man was being taken to task by an eleven-year-old.

  “Uhm.” He cleared his throat. “I think I’m gonna go get coffee.” Paul didn’t wait for a response. He walked briskly toward the door.

  Dani and Lola watched him go. As their gazes met again, Dani pressed her lips together to keep from smiling. “So…still bored?”

  Lola shook her head and grinned.

  A couple hours later and at Dr. Meda’s request, Dani stayed behind after Morning Report.

  “Jesus,” Dani whispered as she peered at the most recent MRI of her newest patient again. The Wilms’ tumor on the boy’s kidney was… “That’s huge.” Her words were superfluous, but she still felt the need to speak them aloud. She minimized the screen and set the iPad down before peering back up at Jacob’s treatment team. She and another resident were lucky enough to be asked to be a part of it.

  “Yes.” Dr. Meda, the attending, put his pen back in his pocket. “Still, Jacob’s mother wants to try or rather she wants to believe that chemo will shrink the tumor into nonexistence—”

  “Most of the kidney including vital blood vessels have been compromised,” Dani said. “He looks to be in stage two, according to his preoperative scans. Jacob’s a very lucky kid, and kind of a cursed one too, to be his age with a Wilms’ tumor. Chemo and surgery. That’s how this works. There’s no way around it.” Dani looked to Dr. Meda.

  “The reminder is unnecessary, Dr. Russell. You’re in a room full of doctors, and Sheri, his mother, is aware of this information. Her husband died less than two years ago during what should have been a routine procedure. Her hesitancy regarding surgery is well earned.”

  Dani glanced at the faces around her. Some nodded in understanding, and others didn’t seem affected at all. “Has somebody talked to her? He has an excellent chance at a full recovery.”

  “As I said, she’s very aware. It’s been a difficult pill for her to swallow,” Dr. Meda reiterated.

  “No, I mean really talked to her. Broken the hard parts down and treated her like she’s human instead of a possible journal footnote?” Dani winced inwardly, hoping her words didn’t sound overly harsh.

  The other resident stared at her with wide eyes, and everyone else looked equally as shocked. However, Dr. Meda smiled.

  Maybe backtracking a little bit wasn’t a bad idea. Dani sucked in a breath. “That came out wrong. I didn’t mean—”

  “Yes, you did, but that’s the main reason why you’re here. Medicine isn’t your only talent.”

  Dani sat up straight and blinked. “Oh…oh, you want me to—”

  “Talk to Sheri. Treat her like she’s human. Break down the hard parts,” Dr. Meda repeated. “She doesn’t seem very impressed by the rest of us. A fresh face could make all the difference. We’ll proceed with chemo, and when the moment comes for surgery, you can help ease her through that reality.” He stood, and everyone else did the same.

  As the resident and other doctors filed out, Dani waited behind.

  “Was there something you wanted to add, Dr. Russell?” Dr. Meda wasn’t a tall man, but he had a regal bearing that his perfect diction reinforced.

  “Yes, I was wondering if you could give me any insight on Sheri? Anything that might help?”

  He nodded. “She’s blunt, sometimes brutally so. I thought initially that mimicking her attitude would be effective, but it wasn’t. I’m afraid, at this point, a change of tactics by someone she’s already met will seem dishonest to her. You and Sheri have that trait in common since you show your fellow residents something similar, but with patients you have compassion, patience, and everything else in abundance.”

  “I wouldn’t say brutal…”

  Dr. Meda stared at her pointedly.

  Dani stopped talking.

  “It’s okay. It works for you. Plus, you’re cordial to w
hom you need to be.”

  She nodded.

  “Read Jacob’s chart from start to finish. I left several personal notations that may be of help as well.”

  “No problem.”

  “Good. I look forward to your overall input on this case.”

  Dani smiled. This was just what she needed right now—a real challenge.

  Now alone, Dani’s initial intent was to educate herself by reading everything she could find about Jacob, but in this situation, that felt wrong. Maybe it was a better idea to start with meeting the actual patient.

  A few minutes later, Dani stood in front of the open door to Jacob Cook’s room. Instead of knocking, she listened and watched. Sheri Cook sat by her son’s bedside. She leaned forward, getting as close as possible. Dani couldn’t hear what they were saying, but the laughter that followed, no matter how weak it was, warmed her heart. Children really were the most resilient miracles. Sometimes, no matter how much pain or discomfort they were in, they found laughter and tiny pockets of happiness.

  Dani rapped her knuckles lightly against the door. As both mother and son turned to look at her, the laughter faded as if Dani was a reminder of where they were and what they had to endure. She stepped forward and glanced around the room.

  “I’m Dr. Russell, a senior pediatric resident, and I’ve just been added to Jacob’s treatment team. But…” Dani let her voice trail off as they digested the new information. “Can I just say I like you guys already? Any boy who can sleep in the My Little Pony room and not complain is impressive in my opinion, and the mother who’s raising him is obviously the best.”

  Sheri Cook studied her. It was an odd feeling, kind of like being poked and prodded by hands Dani couldn’t see. So instead of fighting it, Dani moved forward and gave Sheri time to examine her further as she turned her gaze toward Jacob.

  “Ma says I look good in pink,” Jacob informed her. His voice started out strong but softened almost immediately. As expected for a nine-year-old with cancer, he was tiny, fragile.

  “And what do you think?” Dani asked.

  “It’s cool. I like orange too. She thought I was too black to pull it off, but I showed her.” Jacob nodded and gave her a wan smile.

  Sheri chuckled, and she looked at her son with eyes so full of emotion that Dani found it hard to swallow. She almost stepped away from the intensity.

  “Yes, he did. He’s shown me a lot of things.” Sheri leaned forward and kissed her son’s forehead.

  “Yeah, she knows how to play GTA V now.”

  Dani definitely got the impression that what Sheri had learned from him went much deeper than that.

  Sheri shook her head. “Let you tell it.” She glanced up and held Dani’s gaze. Her expression unreadable. Her only tell was the crinkle between her eyes.

  Just like with superheroes, Dani’d heard enough about video games to have a working knowledge. GTA V was part of the Grand Theft Auto series. Games full of violent, criminal, and sometimes sexual content. Dani wondered if maybe Sheri was waiting to be judged for allowing her son to play.

  Well, she was going to have to wait longer. “I’ve heard that game has a lot of driving in it. Doesn’t that get old?” Dani looked at mother and son for the answer.

  “I—”

  “No! You don’t have to, but you can steal cars, rob people, and do whatever you want.” Jacob interrupted his mother. “That’s the best part.”

  “But we know none of that’s real and decent folks don’t act like that, right?” Sheri looked from her son to Dani and back again.

  “Yeah, Ma. I’m not ever gonna be ’bout that.”

  The best thing for patients and their families was to meet them where they were, whether it was in denial, anger, sadness, or anything else. From what Dani had learned so far, the Cooks seemed hopeful, so that was where she was going to be as well.

  “I know he doesn’t have a lot of energy right now, but I don’t see anything wrong with him playing the games he wants here,” Dani said. “We have some, but they’re not the most recent ones.”

  Sheri’s eyes widened.

  Jacob’s smile was wide and bright. “She’s all right, Ma. I like her.”

  Dani grinned. “I’ll leave you two to discuss it. I’ll be back later.” She walked backward toward the door. Sheri’s expression settled back into inscrutable, but Dani remained hopeful that she’d made progress even if it was only an inch.

  Pasta was supposed to taste better on the second day, but in this particular instance that was not the case. Dani picked up her napkin and got rid of the overly dry mess in her mouth. She bookmarked the medical journal she was reading to prepare for the lecture that was going to be given in Noon Conference and got up to dump the rest of her food in the trash. Whatever they were serving in the cafeteria had to be better than what she’d just thrown away. That’s what she got for trying to cook her own food. She was determined to have an early lunch.

  Once there, Dani eyed the sandwiches. Chicken salad and croissant seemed to be the most decent choice. Besides, they usually made the kind with grapes and walnuts in it. She grabbed a bag of chips and a bottle of water to go along with it. As she waited to move up in the cashier’s line, Dani leaned against the railing and glanced out at the cafeteria. It was bustling just like always, but full of more visitors than hospital personnel.

  She was a little surprised to see Rick at a table by himself. Obviously, he had the sense to stay away from the pasta she’d made. Three days had passed since they’d talked on the roof. They’d been cordial since. So much for working things out. Rick being alone was indeed unusual. He had other friends. Just then, Sandra walked up to his table. Dani couldn’t hear what was being said, but irritation flashed across Rick’s face just as clear as day before Sandra nodded and walked away. Was he isolating himself on purpose? Was he punishing himself?

  “Can you move up, please?”

  Dani jumped slightly and looked at the woman behind her. “Sorry.” She inched forward in line. It was strange to see him like this. Despite his neutrality, Rick was now firmly entrenched in their little melodrama, and it wasn’t agreeing with him at all.

  For a moment, Dani put herself in his shoes. Stuck between two women he loved like sisters and trying vehemently not to hurt either one of them. Rick looked up. Their gazes caught. His smile was slight, hesitant, and then it disappeared completely.

  Somebody needed to do something here. Somebody needed to be the bigger person. It had to be Dani because Becca didn’t have it in her. When things got tough, Becca had a tendency to lash out and eventually leave. She had hard evidence of that. Maybe, just maybe, if Dani waited it out, Becca would leave again and things would go back to normal. She glanced at Rick once more. What kind of person would she be if she let Rick get ripped to shreds in the meantime?

  Finally at the front of the line, Dani gave her lunch to the cashier to scan. She smiled and agreed to have the contents bagged. A few seconds later, as she neared the exit, Dani cast one last look at Rick. Dani would have loved to join him, but this was a working lunch. She had every intention of talking with him later at home where there were no real time constraints. He’d been by her side for so long, she couldn’t remember what it was like without him. Everything that had happened recently hadn’t negated any of the past.

  Dani filed onto the elevator behind other people and moved to the side since the button to her floor had already been pushed. Forgiving Rick would help him, help them, but he was just a piece in the overall complicated puzzle. She had to go where things were most broken: straight to Becca. Dani pressed a hand to her stomach in an attempt to alleviate the sudden hollowness that invaded her insides. She’d push through it for him, and maybe at the same time, she could get some closure.

  Finishing up her final rounds, Dani saved her most difficult case for last. She’d done the obligatory walk-through with the
attending and the rest of the team much earlier, so additional visits to patients weren’t needed. That didn’t keep Dani from doing them despite the extra work. She considered it part of affirming or building rapport.

  She stopped at Jacob’s partially open door and knocked softly. Seconds later, Sheri stood before her. She didn’t look any more welcoming than she did before. Discreetly, Dani looked past her into the dimly lit room.

  Sheri moved to the side obstructing her view. “He’s sleeping.”

  Instead of being put off by Sheri’s protectiveness, Dani was moved by it. “I know. I promise not to wake him. I’d like to see him and check on some things. I saved him for last. Figured you’d want to talk.”

  Sheri’s eyes widened again as surprise flitted across her face. “Yeah, I do, actually.” She stepped out of the doorway completely. After glancing over her shoulder at her sleeping child, she pulled the door closed all the way.

  “Listen.” She lowered her voice and crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s all well and good that my son likes you, but we’re not here to be friends. I just want the best for him, so you don’t have to pretend for me, Just do your job.” Her tone wasn’t bitter or full of attitude, just matter of fact.

  Dani could respect that. “I hear you.”

  “Good.” Sheri nodded and dropped her arms to the side.

  “With that being said, Jacob is not just a rare disease to be studied, zapped, and poked. He’s a pretty sick child who needs care, compassion, and hope from all those around him. That’s part of the healing process too.” Dani paused. “For both of you. You’re people, and I’m going to treat you that way. Okay?”

  Sheri’s mouth opened, closed, and opened again.

  “Now, I promise I’ll do my best not to wake him.” Instead of pushing things further, Dani gave Sheri the reprieve she needed to gather herself.

  Sheri stared, but the wrinkle between her eyes was gone. She stepped out of the way.

  Dani smiled. Confident that she was on the right track, she basked in the positive. Not just for her, but for Jacob and his mother too. Maybe that feeling would stay with her for the rest of the night. More than likely, she’d need it.