Drawing the Line

by KD Williamson

  “To other people in the program, for God’s sake!” Dani fell back, slamming her head against the back of the couch. She peered up at the ceiling. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Becca anymore. Not right now. “They get how consuming it all is. I don’t know why you can’t.”

  “You used to at least try. In the past couple months, you’ve broken just about every promise you made to me, and when was the last time we’ve fucked? I refuse to even try anymore. You’re either too tired or not here. God, sometimes I wish Rick had been sober enough to fuck me at that stupid-ass party. Instead I ended up meeting you. Things would have been way different the other way around.”

  Dani’s mouth fell open. She forgot to breathe. The mental pain that statement caused was the equivalent of a blow to the head. Dani didn’t know what to say but words found their way to the surface anyway. “He’s in the same class as me!”

  “I see him more than I see you. What am I supposed to do, huh? Just sit here and wait?” Becca moved toward her and loomed over her.

  “No, do something with yourself. I can’t be everything to you, not anymore. It’s too goddamned hard!”

  Dani woke up gasping. She threw the covers aside and sat up. Pressing a hand to her chest, she willed her heart and respiration rate to slow to normal. Several seconds passed with no improvement.

  “Damn it!” Her exclamation didn’t make the situation easier. Dani shook her head to clear it, but her mind was overrun, pulsing with thoughts and memories that after all this time shouldn’t have mattered.

  After her impromptu visit to Becca, Dani had hoped to feel settled, relieved. Instead, inside she churned. Her dream had seemed so real. For a moment, she was trapped in her memories where nothing she did was good enough, and every other word out of Becca’s mouth was an accusation or something hateful. The residual pain was sharp, deep, and left an emptiness behind. Dani tried to swallow down the lump forming in her throat. It didn’t budge.

  The confrontation in her dream had been one of their last. By that time, it had been hard to recall what brought them together in the first place and, when she did, Dani hurt even more. Becca’s smoldering intensity had become a thing of the past.

  “Stop. Get out of my head,” Dani pleaded, and fell backward onto the bed. Becca had been home only a matter of weeks, and she’d already invaded places in Dani’s life that should have been locked up tight. “Uhhh!”

  Dani sat up again and tried to drag herself away from the past and everything Becca. That was going to be difficult to do from now on for two reasons. One was across the hall. Shared custody seemed like a strange term to use regarding Rick, but it fit. The other was the unresolved emotions that were running rampant inside her. She wished like hell for apathy but it refused to come. Not that she ever had it in the first place.

  Squinting, Dani peered at the clock on her nightstand. The red numbers were blurry. She reached out, patting around for her glasses, and found them near the lamp. Dani stared at the clock. It was just past four a.m. She lifted her glasses slightly and rubbed her eyes.

  Dani stood and stretched. There was no reason to linger in her bedroom. There was really no reason to stay home. She pulled her door open and walked across the hall to Rick’s. Yes, it was early, but she was eager to see him, talk to him, reconnect. She owed him a real apology for her petulance. When it came down to it, she’d do anything to have her best friend back. Dani knocked softly and put her ear to his door. She gave it a few seconds before doing it again.

  “Rick?”

  No answer. He wasn’t a hard sleeper unless he was exhausted. Dani turned the knob, opening his door. She stared into the darkness and then flipped on the light. His bed was empty and unmade. A twinge started in her chest and ended at the pit of her stomach, leaving a brand new pain behind.

  Becca. He was at Becca’s.

  Dani sucked in a breath to ease the feeling as she identified it. Jealousy. Maybe being an adult about all this was easier said than done.

  When she finally got to Amery, it was well after five a.m. Dani slammed the door to her decrepit Honda and activated the alarm. Not like anyone would steal it, but still. While weaving her way through the resident parking lot, she fished out her cell phone only to stare at it as she inched closer to the building. She’d tried unsuccessfully to push everything she was feeling away, so maybe letting it all out was the best way to go. Dani slid her thumb across Rick’s name and pressed her cell against her ear. It rang three times before he answered.

  “Dr. Turn…” Rick paused. “Oh, hey.” He sounded surprised.

  Dani heard people in the background. A lot of it was muffled but familiar. “Are you at the hospital?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “You stayed there all night?” Dani’s face heated as shame washed over her.

  “Yeah. Oh. You thought…” He sighed. “I think I’m startin’ to understand how a kid feels after his parents’ divorce.”

  She wasn’t surprised by that statement. Dani’d come to the same conclusion herself. “Look, I’m sorry you’re in the middle of all this. I went to talk to her about it. I don’t want you to feel disloyal to either one of us.”

  “I know. She told me.”

  Involuntarily, Dani gritted her teeth. I bet she did. “Atlanta is big. We can all co-exist.” Who was she kidding? They’d probably set the city on fire, but maybe it was best to tell Rick what he needed to hear right now.

  “You would think.” Rick cleared his throat. “So, did things go down like you thought they would?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it. Why don’t you ask her?”

  “I did. All I got was a bunch of uh-huhs and enough gruntin’ to make her sound like a pig. I think once I see her face to face she’ll have somethin’ to say.”

  No, Becca had never been a big talker, but the few words she did speak usually carried weight. “I don’t care if you see her, hang out with her, or whatever.”

  “Hold on.” The noise in the background quieted after a few seconds. “Bullshit.”

  Dani pressed the button for the elevator. She didn’t say a word.

  “This was easier to handle when she wasn’t in town.”

  “I bet. Look, I’m trying to be the bigger person here. You know Becca won’t…” Dani stopped herself before she could go further. “Sorry, sorry.”

  “She’s not the same person she was.”

  “You could’ve fooled me.”

  “Where are you?” Rick asked.

  “In the elevator on my way to Peds.”

  “Come see me first.”

  “No, I don’t wanna do this here. We’ve said enough for right now. Are you gonna be home tonight?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be late, but we’ll talk then?”

  Dani checked the floor number as the elevator dinged. “Yes, we will.”

  When she got to the Peds wing, most of the rooms were still dark, which wasn’t surprising given the hour. Dani stopped at the nurses station, smiling and engaging in small talk with familiar faces, which was a necessary formality. Being on the good side of the nurses in Peds made her days a lot easier. She gathered the needed information from the charge nurse about various patients to better prepare her for the day ahead. By the time she was done, Dani finally had the relief she’d craved earlier as her mind resettled on the challenges in front of her. She belonged to her patients right now, and she’d never felt safer.

  As she passed by Jacob’s still-dimmed room, Dani paused and pushed the door open a little wider, bringing in some light. Sheri Cook sat on the edge of her rollaway cot. Her hands covered her face. She took a step forward. The need to fix revved through Dani’s system.

  Sheri looked up then. She rose from the cot and walked quickly toward Dani. “I know this is a hospital, but don’t I get some kind of privacy? It’s not even light yet. Don’t you have a life?” Her tone
was bitter, angry, and full of emotion. Dani had no idea what to say. She moved backward, and it gave Sheri just enough room to close the door in Dani’s face.

  Dani blinked, and for a few seconds, she stared at the closed door. Numbed and shocked by what occurred, she turned and walked with no destination in mind, ending up in the resident lounge.

  Moving mindlessly, she poured coffee and sat on one of the couches to drink it. Dani replayed the confrontation over and over in her head, trying to figure out what had rattled her. Slowly, she came to the conclusion that maybe she should’ve given Sheri some space. The disagreement itself wasn’t bothering her. It was what Sheri had said. Did she have a life? Of course she did. She had family she talked to occasionally, and she had friends…a friend. Dani had a life, a very full one.

  She was sure of it. Dani did her best to ignore the doubt creeping in.

  Alvin smiled slightly as he opened the bottle at his desk and poured the water into a glass. “Here you go.”

  “Thank you.” Mrs. Stern’s hand shook as she gulped down the first few swallows.

  “You sure you don’t want anythin’ else? We have coffee, Coke, and some other—”

  “No, this is okay.”

  Rebecca had already hit her Coke quota for this morning, otherwise she’d have one in hand. She scooted her chair closer to Mrs. Stern and angled her body toward her. Alvin did the same.

  Mrs. Stern took another drink and held on to the glass, staring into it as she spoke. “I watch Law & Order: SVU. Says to wait forty-eight hours, but he didn’t come home last night. So, I just…couldn’t.”

  “That’s just something they made up for TV. You’re doin’ the right thing.” Alvin said.

  “I know I could have just called to make a report, but that didn’t seem like enough.”

  “Any officer or detective would do the same thing we’re doing. Sometimes this unit doesn’t get involved unless the primary investigation turns up dry, but that doesn’t matter. You came to the right place.” Rebecca kept her voice soft but conversational.

  Mrs. Stern nodded. “Okay. I have a good picture of him. It was just taken a few months back.” She licked her lips. “Last time I saw him, he was leaving to get on the school bus.”

  “What time was that?” Rebecca asked.

  “’Bout 6:45 a.m. yesterday.”

  “Can you give us a description of what he was wearin’?” Rebecca went on.

  Mrs. Stern nodded. “His school uniform. Light-blue shirt with a lion crest for Haywood High, khakis, and a black backpack.” She drank the rest of her water. “I tried callin’ his phone. Had to be ’round thirty times now. It’s goin’ straight to voicemail. I sent texts too.”

  “Do you have any reason to believe that Lewis is in danger? Are there any custody issues? Issues with extended family?” Alvin’s voice was soft and meant to soothe.

  “Lewis is fifteen now, and not a word from that piece of crap. His daddy was long gone before he was even born. His stepfather died a few years back. I got sisters. They love him to death.” She picked up the empty water bottle and tore at the label.

  “So no calls or texts with ransom demands? Or any kind of threats?”

  “No! I don’t have any money, and he’s a good boy. I can’t see nobody wantin’ to hurt him, but…” Mrs. Stern looked down at her hands and then back up at them. “He, uh, it’s been hard to figure him out lately.”

  “What do you mean? Can you be more specific?” Rebecca leaned forward.

  “He used to tell me everythin’, but the past few weeks he’s been downright mean.”

  Rebecca nodded and waited for her to continue.

  “Snappin’ at me and tellin’ me to mind my own business. He is my business. You don’t know how bad I wanted to snatch him up and knock some sense into him. I did once. Just made things worse. Thought it was drugs, but I know what high looks like. Plus, I never found anythin’ in his room.”

  That didn’t necessarily mean anything, but Rebecca chose to remain quiet about it. Instead, she scribbled down everything they’d learned so far in her leatherbound notepad. The conversation was being recorded, but she liked to keep her own notes regardless.

  “Did he ever come home bruised or scuffed up? Did he have any…new friends?” Alvin asked hesitantly.

  Mrs. Stern went rigid. She sat up tall with her shoulders back. “I know where you headed, but no, he never came home beat up. He’s no hustler, and he knows better than to sniff around gangs.”

  “I know questions like that are upsettin’.” Rebecca knew they were going to be. Parents liked to think they were aware of everything about their kids. “We didn’t mean any disrespect, Mrs. Stern. We just need to cover as many angles as possible.”

  Glaring, Mrs. Stern huffed. “Right.” She paused. “Anyhow, he’s been hangin’ out with the same group of kids since elementary school, at least he was.”

  “What do you mean?” Rebecca asked as she wrote some more.

  “Haven’t seen ’em in a while. About two months, I think. In fact, nobody’s been around. He’s been goin’ to them instead. At least that’s what he said. I didn’t have reason to think he was lyin’.”

  “Okay, can we get the names of all his friends? Addresses and phone numbers too if you got ’em. Better include family members in that as well.” Rebecca noticed Mrs. Stern’s glass was empty. “Do you need another water?”

  “No, not right now.”

  “Names of any places he hung out at or you think he might go to hole up.”

  Mrs. Stern’s eyes widened. “You think he ran away? He didn’t have no reason to run away. He could’ve been in an accident and be lyin’ on the side of the road somewhere—”

  “Just coverin’ all the bases, remember?” Rebecca tried to calm her with the reminder. “We’ll make sure to check the local hospitals too.”

  “Okay, okay.” Mrs. Stern took a deep breath. “Maybe I’m just freakin’ out about nothin’, but he always comes home. Do you think I should wait and see before y’all do all this work?”

  Rebecca glanced at Alvin. He opened his mouth to speak but she beat him to it. “Did you check to see if he was at school this mornin’?”

  “Yeah, and he wasn’t.”

  “Then what does your gut tell you?” Rebecca asked.

  Mrs. Stern met Rebecca’s gaze, her forehead creased with worry. “I’ll get you all the numbers and addresses you need. I called all his friends. They say they haven’t heard from him, but they might talk to y’all.” Her eyes glazed over, and seconds later, she was crying.

  Rebecca jumped up and grabbed the Kleenex on the opposite end of Alvin’s desk.

  After taking several tissues, Mrs. Stern wiped her eyes and and pulled out her phone. She stared down at it. “I’m sorry. Can I please use your bathroom?”

  Alvin stood. “Sure. Down the hall to the left.” He trailed behind Mrs. Stern for a second before turning toward Rebecca. “So that’s how it is, huh?”

  “What?” Rebecca asked.

  “I don’t have a problem with you takin’ lead on this.”

  “I’m fine with that, but I wasn’t tryin’ to step on your toes.” Rebecca folded her arms over her chest.

  “I’m not like that. It’s all good. You’ve got some experience.” Alvin sat in his chair.

  “If you say so.”

  “I just did.” Alvin paused. They heard sniffling and it was getting louder. “Okay. Here she comes.” Leave it to him to state the obvious.

  Rebecca waited until Mrs. Stern was seated before resuming the interview. “It’s best if I tell you how this works, especially for a juvenile. We’re gonna issue a county-wide alert through e-mail and radio so that everyone local will be on the lookout. Right now, I’m not a hundred percent sure he isn’t a runaway.”

  “I told you. He’s not!” Mrs. Stern’s eyes
were bloodshot, but that didn’t keep her from glaring at Rebecca.

  “And I heard you.” Rebecca held up a placating hand. “But we’re not takin’ any chances and neither should you. So, I’m gonna put him in NCIC. It’s a database that police all over use. If he’s spotted, we’ll know. We’re gonna check with everyone on that list you gave us, including his school, hospitals, everythin’. If it goes deeper than that and we find out he’s been taken, we’ll follow procedure and get an AMBER Alert issued.

  Mrs. Stern nodded and sniffled. “Okay, thank you.”

  Still wiping her eyes, Mrs. Stern left a few minutes later. Rebecca made some final notations and looked up when Alvin cleared his throat.

  “So, whatcha think?”

  “Nothin’ indicates kidnappin’.”

  Alvin nodded and scratched at his beard. “He really could be in the wind. Maybe Mom didn’t tell us everything, or…”

  “Or what?” Rebecca met his gaze.

  “We could be dealin’ with a mental health case.”

  Suicide. Rebecca met Alvin’s gaze. Some of the signs were there, but it was still a big leap to make without looking further into things. “We’ll see.”

  “Can’t rule out the possibility he found himself locked in a nigga moment and ended up in a shit-load of trouble either.”

  Rebecca cringed. “Don’t use that word around me.”

  Alvin’s face scrunched up. “You serious? I said nigga, not nigger. I’m just keepin’ things real. Callin’ it like I see it. “

  “Yeah, I’m doin’ the same thing.” She hated that word. There was no way to use it in a positive light. It wasn’t like he was trying anyway.

  His bushy eyebrows shot up. “All right, I hear you.”

  “Good, I’ll put him in the system, and then we can get on with the legwork.”

  Rebecca pressed her lips together and shook her head as she looked at the dead body of Lewis Stern with a bullet wound to his chest. “Yeah, that’s him.”

  The morgue attendant nodded and covered him with the sheet before closing the drawer. It hadn’t taken them long to get a lead. They’d gotten information that there had been a couple of GSWs with fatalities in the area the past twelve hours that matched Lewis’s description.