Passionate Addiction

by Eden Summers

  ***

  After his heart rate returned to normal, Blake disposed of the condom, straightened his clothing, and gave Gabi a quick kiss on the lips.

  “So, you’re going to go out there and pretend like I’m still freshening up?”

  She was panicking. Her eyes were wide, her throat convulsing with a deep swallow.

  “You’ll be fine. Just walk out there and pretend like nothing happened.”

  “Yeah, sure, pretend like nothing happened. And hopefully everyone will miss how my dress is now sporting a thousand wrinkles and my face is flushed.”

  His lips curved. “Don’t forget the hickey on your neck.”

  Her eyes bugged, and she turned to lean into the mirror. “Are you kidding me?”

  He laughed, and she pivoted on her toes to slap a hand over his mouth…again. “Laugh all you want, Blake, but if I get arrested and my parents find out it was because my tattooed, rock star boyf—” She fumbled, breaking eye contact before continuing her rant. “Because I was getting rammed in a commercial airline bathroom, you can deal with my father’s wrath all by yourself.”

  Boyfriend. Fuck that sounded good, even though her eyes were now wide in what he assumed was embarrassment. He’d been in relationships before, and normally, the title made his balls shrivel and kick start his mind into planning an escape route. Not this time. Now he knew he’d found what he’d been looking for and couldn’t wait to meet her father.

  “He’ll castrate you.” She diverted her gaze to his shirt and poked him in the chest.

  OK, well, that tarnished the thrill of meeting her dad just a little bit.

  “You won’t get arrested.” He pretended to ignore the boyfriend comment, not wanting to increase her anxiety. He tapped her ass, enjoying the way she jolted in shock. “Follow me out in a few minutes and act natural.”

  “Act natural,” she mumbled. “Spoken like a man of experience.”

  He tapped her ass again, this time harder, in warning. His “experience” meant jack shit when he now felt like a teenage virgin around Gabi. “I’ll see you out there.”

  She sucked in a sharp breath and nodded.

  Blake escaped the bathroom, closing the door behind him, and headed for his chair. He puffed out his chest and couldn’t wipe the I-just-got-laid expression from his face. Oh yeah, everyone in business class knew. Some glared at him in disgust, most grinned, sharing in the awesomeness. He couldn’t shake the pride from his step and didn’t bother trying to hide it. Why the hell should he? When it came to Gabi, he was happy to let the world know how much of a love struck fool he was.

  Once he took his seat, the flight attendant walked toward him, giving a barely discernible shake of her head, her plump red lips curving.

  “Mr. Kennedy.” She crouched down in the aisle beside his chair and raised a brow. “I hope your friend is feeling better.”

  He struggled not to laugh. “Yeah, I’m sure my girlfriend will be perfectly fine for the rest of the flight.”

  He’d never felt the need to clarify a relationship with anyone before. Ever. Yet right now he wanted this woman to know he was taken. He wanted to wipe the flirtatious smile from her face and make her realize that no other woman would ever tempt him.

  She inclined her head and reached into her pants pocket. “Would you mind signing this for me?” She handed him a small notepad and pen. “It’s against company policy to ask, but seeing as though you’re probably overwhelmed with...relief from your friend’s sudden recovery, I thought you wouldn’t mind.”

  Translation: Sign the notepad or I’ll tell the captain you were caught fucking on the plane and have airport security greet you once we land. It wasn’t the first time he’d been threatened because of the enjoyment he participated in while thirty-six thousand feet in the air.

  “Sure.” He grabbed the pad and signed his name, scribbling underneath it

  —Totally enjoyed the ride.

  When he glanced up to hand her the pad, Gabi was standing behind the flight attendant, her face blank, devoid of emotion. Was she jealous? The green-eyed monster accompanied every relationship he’d been in since he started playing live gigs. Even back in the days of small stints at local clubs, the women he dated never trusted him and hated the attention he received. It was a pain in the fucking ass, but he was used to it. He also couldn’t fault Gabi when he’d had the same aggressive feeling earlier in the day because of Troy.

  “Hey, gorgeous.” He passed the notepad to the attendant and reached for Gabi’s hand, pulling her in to sit beside him. “How are you feeling?”

  She cleared her throat and sat down. “Umm…” She squirmed in her chair, her gaze going from him to the brunette now standing beside him. “Fine.”

  The woman leaned in. “I’ll leave you alone to enjoy the rest of your flight.”

  Blake remained focused on Gabi, determined not to give the flight attendant the attention she craved. When the attendant’s hand came to rest on his shoulder, squeezing lightly in a silent goodbye, he worked his jaw and hoped like hell that Gabi’s blank expression didn’t hide the spite he anticipated.

  Gabi watched the woman walk away, following her to the front of the cabin before her focus came back to him. “How bloody embarrassing,” she hissed through smiling lips. “She totally knew what we were doing in there, and she was still hitting on you.”

  He waited for her annoyance. For the scorn to replace her cheerful expression. “Yeah. Fans will do crazy things.”

  Gabi shuddered. “I’m glad it’s you and not me.”

  “It doesn’t bother you?”

  “What? A crazy woman asking for your autograph? Or was she asking for your number?” She shrugged. “Either way it doesn’t matter. You can’t help that other people think you’re awesome. It kinda makes me feel sorry for her ‘cause I know the real you, and it ain’t all that flash.” Her smile widened.

  He ignored the cheekiness, needing to make sure she wasn’t placating him. “You aren’t jealous?”

  She gazed into his eyes, her smile softening in a look he hoped was admiration. “Maybe a little. But I trust you. If I can’t do that when you’re a few feet away, how will I cope when you’re on the other side of the world?”

  Damn her perfect logic. He grabbed her hand and brought her knuckles to his mouth for a kiss. “I love you, you know that.”

  “Doesn’t co—”

  He plastered his hand over her mouth, paying her back for the times she’d done it to him in the bathroom. “It does count,” he leaned in to whisper in her ear. “It counts every damn time I say it. It doesn’t matter if I’m fucking you, loving you, or trying to drown you in the Australian ocean. I love you, Gabi, more than life.”

  He meant every word. Nothing mattered more to him. Reckless was his career. Gabi was his forever. From now on, he’d always put her first. “And while we’re discussing us, I want to talk about the whole boyfriend-girlfriend thing.”

  The tops of her cheeks reddened. “I didn’t mean to say that earlier. I was flustered. It just came out.”

  Her nervousness did funny things to his stomach. “So you didn’t mean it?”

  She stilled and focused on the back of the chair in front of her. “No… I just… I don’t know what this is classified as.” She lazily waved her hand between them. “Like I said, I trust you…with my heart, and I know you wouldn’t deliberately hurt me. I’m just unsure what this thing between us is and what exactly will happen when we’re apart.”

  Her nervousness may have done funny things to his stomach, however, hearing the vulnerability in her voice made his balls shrivel.

  “Look at me,” he kept his voice low, not wanting their private conversation to be overheard and somehow included in an upcoming celebrity gossip column.

  Slowly she turned to face him, leaning her head back against the chair.

  “What do you want to happen?”

  She broke eye contact to stare down the aisle and he dragged a finger along her jaw, drawi
ng her attention back to him.

  “I want whatever I can have, Blake.” Her voice was raw and entirely brutal against his heart. “I want everything you’ll give me.”

  Blake had been on auto-pilot for the remainder of the flight and the traffic-filled drive to their hotel. Things between them were too effortless, too right. They both wanted the same thing, so why did it feel like he was skirting disaster instead of being happy with the glimpse of a perfect future?

  He kept freaking out, wondering if Gabi’s feelings would change when she faced the harsher aspects of his life. So far, things had been quiet. Only one security guard had been necessary to escort them in and out of the airports. He’d been asked for one or two photographs, had signed the same amount of autographs and that was it. Barely anyone recognized him.

  That would all change once he caught up with the rest of Reckless Beat—the unruly fans, the lack of privacy, the distance it would place between them while on tour. Right now was the easy part. Yet, when they pulled up to the Crown hotel, well past nightfall, and their chauffeured ride was surrounded by a hoard of screaming fans, his initial panic was doused by her glance of admiration. She waited patiently beside him as he chatted to the crowd before making their way into the hotel.

  It was surreal. And way too easy.

  “You’re quiet,” Gabi broke the silence as they rode the elevator to the 31st floor. “Are you tired?”

  He shook his head. “No, angel, but you look beat.” He hadn’t allowed her much sleep last night, and the darkness of exhaustion had settled under her eyes.

  She let out a derisive chuckle. “Oh, you’re so sweet.”

  Closing the space between them, he cupped her face and rubbed his thumb along her cheekbone. “Don’t get sassy with me.” He pressed into her, leaving a tender kiss on her lips, again and again and again. “How’s your head?”

  The elevator pulled to a stop and the doors opened.

  “Better than my stomach,” she replied, moving around him to walk into the hall. “I’m starving.”

  How could things between them be so simple? Overnight they’d fallen into a relationship with a foundation more solid than anything he’d ever experienced. Now they only had to figure out how to keep it going.

  Monogamy would be a major component, for him anyway. He couldn’t be far away from her, knowing that any man could lay claim to her gorgeous body before he finished the Australian tour. Once the remaining concerts were over, he’d be able to spend some time with her, maybe a week or two, before heading back to the US. And by then, it wouldn’t be long until she graduated.

  It still wasn’t enough. He couldn’t stand the thought of watching her leave on Tuesday. It made him feel like a pansy-ass to acknowledge it, but being around Gabi made him warm—his chest, his shattered heart, his frigid soul. She brought him back to life, and he wanted to be able to repay her unwavering support.

  He waited on the couch for their luggage to be delivered while Gabi freshened up. By the time she came out of the shower, dressed in a mouthwatering pink negligee, his taste buds no longer craved the food that room service had delivered.

  “Oh, gosh, that smells good,” she groaned and collapsed into the seat across from him at the dining table.

  “Looks good, too,” he murmured, his sight never leaving the feminine curves of her body.

  She swiped her tongue over her lips, bringing his cock to life in one simple action.

  “You’re insatiable.” She chuckled and began cutting her steak.

  “Only for you.”

  He forked food into his mouth. He didn’t know and didn’t care what it was, he was too focused on the way Gabi briefly closed her eyes with every mouthful and moaned low in her throat. “This is so good. I feel like I haven’t eaten in days.”

  He felt like he hadn’t touched her in days.

  “You spoil me, Blake Kennedy.”

  God, he loved how she said his name—part chastising, part seductive. He’d be happy to bathe her in money and take her to fancy hotels every night of the week if she continued to repay him with affection. The way her face lit up at the mere sight of their suite and the view of Melbourne below was priceless. Alluring. Uplifting. Sexy as hell…and damn, he had it bad.

  Focus.

  He’d come up with another opportunity where they could spend more time together and wanted to broach the subject before his cock took over. Reaching for her over the dark wooden table, he maneuvered around plates and glasses to squeeze her hand. “I want to go back home with you on Tuesday.”

  Her eyes widened and she cleared her throat.

  “We already have access to the concert venue,” he continued, “so the guys and I can set up early. I can be with you on Wednesday and catch a late flight back.”

  She didn’t respond with the excitement he anticipated. Her throat convulsed with a swallow, and she moved her gaze to stare at their entwined fingers. “Blake… I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’ll be spending Wednesday with my family, doing the same thing we do every year on the anniversary of Greg’s death.” Her focus slowly lifted to his, her face now pinched.

  “I know, and I want to be there for you. I’d like to meet your parents.” Shit. He was putting his heart on the line, and for some reason, he didn’t have a good feeling about the outcome.

  She slowly shook her head. “It wouldn’t be the best time to meet them.”

  “I know the timing isn’t perfect, but I’d still like to be there. For you.”

  She smiled at him, squeezing his fingers. “You’re sweet. But I can’t.”

  He waited for her to explain, to give him a reason other than bad timing. Only silence came.

  “Why?” He slid his hand away and leaned back in his chair. For years he’d listened to her cry on the anniversary of her brother’s death. Not being able to hold her in his arms and comfort her had torn him apart…and now that he had the opportunity, she was pushing him away.

  She focused on his hand as it retreated. “My parents.”

  “What about ‘em?” He picked up his knife and fork and started to brutalize his steak.

  “Blake,” she pleaded.

  The pain in her voice was his undoing, and there was something underneath all that, something she tried to hide from him. He needed to know what it was.

  He placed his utensils back down. “What about your parents?”

  Gabi winced and looked him straight in the eye. “No matter how I say this, you’re going to take it the wrong way, and I don’t want that.”

  Fuck. Now he was beyond worried. His forehead started to break out in a cold sweat. “Tell me.”

  She stretched across the table in search of his hand, and he reached up to meet her. Something bad was coming. He could feel it in the warmth that dissipated from his chest.

  “My parents will judge you.”

  He fought to contain his annoyance. People always judged him. The concept was far from new when it came to his appearance. So why had it never bothered him until now?

  He nodded and shrugged. “Don’t worry about it.” He patted her hand, then pushed from his chair, no longer hungry. Grabbing his empty glass, he walked to the nearby kitchen and filled it with water, chugging the contents to drown out the hurt.

  “Blake.” He heard her chair scrape and her soft footfalls as she approached.

  “I said don’t worry about it, Gabi. I get it.”

  She moved in behind him and wrapped her hands around his waist, resting her head against his shoulder blade. “They worry about me.”

  He got that. Really. He did. He was just sick of living with the knowledge that he wasn’t good enough for her. For not being the guy she deserved. He never would be. Even before this weekend he’d known. And those were his own thoughts. What would it be like when someone else was there to reiterate how unworthy he was?

  “I’ve told you before that they’re judgmental. They’ve always wanted to see me with an investment banker or lawyer or something equally po
mpous.” She continued to talk against his back. “And that’s their problem. I knew sooner or later they’d have to deal with what guy I brought home, because their opinion on what type of man I should be with is far from what I envision. But…” She squeezed him tight and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. “You will remind them of Greg. The tattoos. The clothing. The confidence in who you are. They’ll take one look at you and panic.”

  He tightened his hold on the glass and gripped the counter with the other hand. Every word ripped him apart. Every reminder of his lack of worth. But like a masochist, he couldn’t tell her to stop.

  “And on any other day, I wouldn’t care, Blake. I swear to you, I wouldn’t. I just can’t do it to them on the anniversary of Greg’s death.”

  He turned, poised to walk away and gain some space. “I understand. And they have every right to draw those conclusions. I am everything that Greg was. I’m the drug addict from the wrong side of the tracks.” He took a step around her.

  She grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling hard. “No, you aren’t.” She reached up on her toes so they were mouth to mouth, her heated breath drifting over his skin. “You like to think you’re the bad guy. But you’re not. You’re a soft teddy bear hiding behind tattoos, leather wrist bands, and dark clothing.” Her fingers found his nape, and he closed his eyes briefly at the sensation. “I love you.”

  He wanted to push her away, to place distance between them so he could brood in private. Gabi wouldn’t let him.

  “I can’t wait for you to meet my parents,” she continued. “For us both to prove them wrong. Together.” Her lips pressed against his, soft and sweet, making his uncontrollable body react. When she pulled back and made eye contact, her irises were fathomless in the deepest blue. “But Wednesday isn’t the day for that. Let me spend this last anniversary with them, because next year, hopefully, I’ll be spending it alone with you.”

  Gabi had a way of turning things around and making him hopeful.

  “Come lay down with me,” she continued. “My head hurts and I need to rest for a while.”