After Glow

by Autumn Jones Lake

  What seems like hours later, Z’s shadow looms over me and I glance up,

  “What?”

  He’s got a serious expression in place and motions toward the bedroom.

  Stella has her robe on and her crew is busy packing up their equipment. The dickwad duo are busy staring at Stella like she’s a prime rib.

  “I don’t think these two bros have gotten the message that their time is up,” Z says. “Let’s help them along.”

  “Finally gonna do what we been gettin’ paid for? Great.” I crack my knuckles and follow Z, itching to beat the shit out of someone.

  Hope’s downstairs reading when I finally walk in the front door. She sets her book down beside her and glances up. “How was it?”

  “Disgusting.” Yup, that’s the only way to describe it. Although, putting my fist in dickwad number one’s face had been rather cathartic.

  “I’d get up and hug you, but…” She gestures to her belly.

  “On my way, baby doll.”

  She holds her arms out so I can help her off the couch. “Now what would you have done if I wasn’t here to help you up?”

  “Peed myself, probably.”

  Shit, she cracks me up. I follow her down the hall and wait outside the door for her.

  “So tell me. Was it exciting being a bouncer on a porn set?” she calls out. Her voice is teasing, but I’m listening for any hints that she’s more upset about today’s job than she’s letting on.

  Yes, I’d been completely honest about what this “club business” entailed. “No. It was boring and disgusting.”

  “That bad, huh?”

  “Yes. Twenty years ago, I might have been intrigued,” I admit. “Now, all I wanted was to be home with you.”

  “Aw.” She nuzzles up against me and presses a soft kiss on my cheek. “I missed you,” she whispers.

  “She did ask if we were interested in a biker series she wants to film.”

  All at once she stops nuzzling me and takes a step back. “What?”

  Why the fuck did I have to say that now?

  “Rock? What are you telling me?”

  “Nothing. I just want… honesty.”

  “So you thought you’d come home and tell your fat, pregnant wife that a hot young porn actress hit on you?”

  Angered by her description of herself, my jaw tightens. Although, from her point of view, I understand why she’s less than thrilled by my candor.

  “She didn’t hit on me. And don’t talk about my wife that way.”

  She rolls her eyes and rubs her hand over her stomach. “So, finish your story.”

  “Nothing. I told her I was married and that my wife was a big fan.”

  She tosses her head back and laughs. “Oh my God. You did not!”

  “I did.”

  “So you won’t be filming Banged by the Biker any time soon?”

  “Fuck no. Not unless it’s with you.”

  “Hmm, so anything new and exciting you want to try out downstairs?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows at me.

  “Fuck, I love you. And yes, I have a few ideas.”

  Shaking her head, she holds her arms out, and I sweep her up in the hug she’s looking for. She rests her cheek over my heart. “Anything else interesting?”

  “Yeah, Z wanted to audition for the lead role in Banged by the Biker.”

  She pulls back, looking more troubled or sad than the disgust I expected. “Aw. Poor Z.”

  “Poor Z?”

  “Well, yes.” She flaps her hands in the space between us. “He seemed… I don’t know, lost when he took me to the doctor the other day. I think he really wants to settle down and have a family but doesn’t know how.”

  “Trust me, he knows how.”

  She smacks my chest lightly. “You know what I mean.”

  Thinking back over the last few months—hell, over the last two years—Z’s behavior, and especially some of his more annoying questions earlier today, makes more sense. I shake my head. “Shit. The only woman I think he’s ever been close to serious about is Lilly.”

  “He told me.” Her voice falters. “I feel bad. I offered to try and get a hold of her, but—”

  “Yeah, no. Z’s got way too much pride to let you play matchmaker.”

  “I don’t blame him.”

  “Have you heard from her at all?”

  “She sent me a card and gift for the baby shower. I tried calling to thank her, but she never answers and her voicemail is always full.”

  “Come on, let’s go upstairs.”

  She arches an eyebrow. “I thought you wanted to go downstairs.”

  I contemplate it for about five seconds. “Tomorrow. Right now, I want to shower off the stench of today and cuddle up with my girl.”

  “Cuddle, huh?”

  “Naked cuddling.”

  “I like the sound of that.” She takes my hand and tugs me toward the stairs. We take them together. Slow. I keep my hands on her ass to help with her “balance,” which she doesn’t buy for a second.

  “My balance is fine.”

  “So is your ass.”

  She giggles. Real, honest laughter. Not sounds carefully crafted for the camera.

  Upstairs, she follows me into the bathroom, but not the shower. Instead, she perches on the edge of the bathtub.

  “You want me to run you a bath?”

  She glances at the tub. “I don’t think I have the energy to get in and out.”

  I run my knuckles over her cheek. “Go get into bed. I’ll be right there.”

  Not too much later, we’re settling down for the night. She snuggles tight against my side.

  “I love you, Rochlan,” she says, low and soft. If I had to guess, I’d say she’s fighting back tears.

  “Love you too, baby doll.”

  “I’m sorry I’m more teary and hormonal and fragile than usual.”

  I tighten my arms around her. “I wouldn’t want you any other way.” I knead my fingers into her back. “How do you feel?”

  “Yucky. I hurt all over.”

  “Want me to take care of you?”

  “Yes,” she murmurs against my shirt.

  “This is what I thought about all day.” Her warmth. Her softness. Being close. Breathing her in. Feeling her heart thump. My craving just to be in her presence never goes away.

  She snorts softly, and my hold on her tightens. “I mean it, Hope. You’re my heart. My home. I’m restless every second until I’m with you.”

  “Rock.” She sighs and kisses my cheek. “I feel the same way. I missed you today, and not because I was worried about where you were.”

  “You were never far from my mind.” It’s the absolute truth. “You and our baby girl.” I rub my hand over her stomach, searching for any sign of movement. I’m rewarded with a small kick that steals my breath.

  Hope’s warm minty breath washes over my cheek. “I think she was waiting for her daddy to get home.”

  My heart clenches and I kiss my way down to Hope’s belly, pressing my lips to the last spot I felt Grace move. “I’m home, now. Time to let your mom get some rest.”

  Hope laughs softly, and runs her fingers through my hair. “I bet this isn’t how you thought your life would turn out. Rubbing your teary, pregnant wife’s back and talking to her belly.”

  “You’re wrong. This right here. Right this second. I may not have known it until I met you, but this is exactly what I’ve always wanted.”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Rock

  Today I saved the best news for last at church.

  “Hope had Inga’s petition officially thrown out. We’re finally all clear.”

  “Suck it, bitch!” Stash yells.

  “Since we’re all here,” Z says, breaking up the chatter around us. “And speaking of porn stars…”

  I glare at him. “I’m done playing bouncer for Sway.”

  “No, I got something else in mind,” Z assures me.

  “We all know what, Zero,
don’t be shy,” Ravage says.

  “Fuck off.” He blows out a breath and runs his fingers through his hair before throwing a look at Dex. “You better back me up, bro.”

  Dex sits forward, the corners of his mouth twitching with laughter. “Go ahead.”

  “Besides the porn thing, Stella does aerial arts,” Z says.

  “What. The. Fuck?” Ravage asks. “Why do you even know what that is?”

  “Like you know what it is?” Teller says to Ravage.

  “For fuck’s sake, shut the hell up and let Z talk.” I slap my hand on the table. Maybe it’s time to go back to the gavel.

  As if he read my mind, Wrath reaches behind him, slides open a drawer, and sets the gavel in front of me.

  “Thanks,” I mutter. “Go on.” I nod at Z.

  “Business is a little slow at CB. It’s too early for the normal lull we usually get at the beginning of the summer. I was thinking of asking Stella to perform at the club. We could class up the place, make it sound less seedy, and market it to a slightly different crowd than we normally get.”

  As annoying as babysitting Stella had been, I’m actually impressed with Z’s idea and initiative. I don’t even care that he’s probably using it as a ploy to get into Stella’s panties.

  “Continue.”

  “Well, that’s what I was discussing with the contractors last time. I need to make sure we can install the rigging she needs.”

  “We’re gonna wanna up the liability insurance for the club if we do this, Z,” Teller mutters, picking up a pen and jotting down a few notes. Already trying to work out the financial aspects. Fuck, I’m proud of him.

  “I wanted the club’s approval before I got into that stuff,” Z says.

  “You’re managing the place, Z. If you think it’s a good idea, that’s your call.” I glance down the table. “Anyone got a problem with that?”

  “When are you gonna do it?” Ravage asks. “You can’t waste a weekend night on some arty-farty crap.”

  Dex slowly turns his head Ravage’s way. “Why are you such an asshole?”

  “I was thinking we’d try it out on a Monday night. She has her own PR people. Most of her shows are down in the city. I’m not sure if she even wants to branch out.”

  “I don’t know if Empire is sophisticated and cultured enough for the aerial arts,” Sparky says with a haughty tone that cracks everyone up, even Z.

  “Yeah, that’s why I figured a Monday night. I’ll split the door profits with her rather than giving her a flat fee. That way she’s got the incentive to promote it too. If it works out, we can renegotiate for next time.”

  “All right. Sounds like you have it covered. What do you need from the club?”

  “Support. An audience.” He glances at the door. “Make an event out of it.”

  “You got it.”

  Z blows out a relieved breath. “Thanks.”

  “Anything else?”

  Everyone says no.

  The guys trickle out of the room, stopping to joke around and trade insults.

  I turn Z’s way and stop him from leaving.

  “I like this idea.”

  He raises an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

  “Something different no one else in the area has. Apparently she has the name recognition, which will appeal to some of our regulars. Yeah, it’s a solid idea.”

  “Thanks.”

  “That what you were talking with her about when I thought you were in there making your porn-star debut?”

  He gives me a sheepish smile. “Yeah.”

  Hope

  “Hope, can I talk to you for a sec?” Z asks after emerging from the war room.

  “Of course.”

  He sits down on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. “Rock told you all about the security work we did for Sway? Stella. The girl we, the actress—”

  “The adult film star?” I chuckle softly. “I know who she is, Z.”

  “You do?”

  I give him a patient smile. “Yes, Z. You know she does more than just have sex on camera, right?”

  He gives me a devilish grin. “I do. That’s actually what I was going to tell you.”

  “You lost me. She writes a feminist blog.”

  “I don’t have any use for that at CB. You’re a bad enough influence on my girls.”

  When I stop laughing, I reach over and pat his knee. “Okay. I’m dying here. Spill.”

  “She also does aerial arts—”

  “Yes! She uses a Lyra right?”

  He cocks his head. “You know what it is?”

  “It’s like a metal hula hoop.” I draw a circle in the air with my finger. “Suspended from the ceiling.”

  “Right. So, I’m setting up a night at CB for her to come do her thing. Trying to make it like a classy event, bring some new customers in and some money.”

  “Sounds like a great idea.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Um, don’t make fun of me. But am I allowed to go too? I’d love to see her perform.”

  “Really?” His eyes widen. “Yeah, that’s kinda what I wanted to ask. If you have any friends you can talk into going too.”

  “Sure, I’ll ask.”

  Actually, when I stop and think about it, besides Mara, I don’t have a lot of friends outside the club.

  “Honestly, if you can just talk Trinity and Charlotte into going, that’d be cool too,” he adds.

  “What about Swan?”

  He grins. “She has an opening performance.”

  “Wow. Cool.”

  He chuckles at my enthusiasm. “Yeah, I’m trying to make a big thing out of it. I have one girl who does silks.”

  “Oh, that’s really pretty.”

  He grins. “She started using them in her act sometimes. But our regulars really aren’t there for all the acrobatics, ya know?”

  My mouth twitches. “You don’t say.”

  “Thanks for being cool about this, Hope. The guys think it’s stupid. It could be good for the club or a complete waste of money and time.”

  “You’ll never know until you try.”

  Rock

  I stick my head out of the war room and spot Z talking to Hope.

  Dex is out there, and I wave him to join me.

  He closes the door behind him and drops heavily into Wrath’s chair.

  “How you doing?”

  He sighs and runs his hands through his hair. “Feeling caged in. Thinking about a long ride.”

  I figured as much. He’s done it every year around this time since I’ve known him.

  “Taking anyone with you?”

  He levels a cool stare my way. “Don’t go there.”

  I give him a half smile. “I meant another brother. So you’re not out on the road alone.”

  “Ravage said he might be up for it. If you think you can spare both of us.”

  “Whatever you need, brother.”

  “How’s Hope?” he asks. The change in topic doesn’t surprise me. “She feeling okay?”

  “Tired,” I answer honestly. “The doctor threatened her with bed rest if she doesn’t keep her blood pressure down.”

  “Shit, Prez. Maybe you’re the one who needs some time off. Maybe I should stick around. You need to take care of your girl.”

  No way am I forcing him to stay back when I know how much he needs to get away right now. “We’re okay. You know Murphy hardly ever lets Hope out of his sight.”

  He snorts and sits back. “Z’s been watching out for her too.” He glances around the war room as if seeing it for the first time in a long time. “This is what you always promised it would be.”

  “It wouldn’t be what it is without you.”

  “Every one of us,” he agrees. “You’ve built a good crew, Rock. I’m glad you pushed back at National about adding to our ranks.”

  His phone buzzes, and he slips it out of his pocket, responding to the text before meeting my eyes again. “Vapor. I’ll see if he feels like g
oing with me. Dude’s turned into a fucking beast.”

  I groan and sit back. “Where’d he end up?”

  Dex shrugs. “Not sure. He’s always been cagey about letting people know where he is. They were talking about moving back up here, though.”

  “See if he wants some work. Shit, I’d patch him right now if I didn’t think he’d gut one of us the first time we pissed him off.”

  “What are you thinking of giving him? And don’t say watching the porn set next time. He’d probably terrify that poor girl.”

  I chuckle and think it over. “Probably some of that action DeLova mentioned out at Stump’s place. He wanted to broker a deal with Sway, but I’m thinking Vapor might be a better man to show up since he won’t run his mouth.”

  “It’s amazing Sway hasn’t been overthrown all these years,” Dex muses.

  “No kidding.”

  “You hear anything else from Inga? That shit’s done and over for real, right?”

  The mention of the paternity bullshit squeezes my chest. I swallow down the lump in my throat. “Haven’t heard a word from her.”

  “Good. That better be the last we hear from her.”

  “Amen, brother.”

  “Hope doesn’t need that bullshit right now.”

  I want to say, “Hope’s stronger than anyone in this clubhouse thinks.” She accepted the news of Teller being my son without a second thought. Has done everything to make him feel welcomed and included while honoring his wish not to let Heidi or Murphy know the truth.

  Fuck, if that’s not killing me. I want everyone to know the truth.

  “She handled it well,” I answer.

  “Sure did.” Dex stands. “You’re a lucky man, Prez.”

  I follow him to the door, where he turns and gives me a quick embrace. “I won’t be gone too long,” he promises. “Probably be back in time for Z’s show. Let me know if you need something.”

  “Will do.” I say it to reassure him, but nothing short of a fucking apocalypse could make me bother him when he’s on this run.

  We step into the clubhouse, where the party’s already started. Dex bites his lip and pushes his way to the front door.