It pained Emily to hear her mother speak as though Kyle were dead, and as though she herself had nothing to do with his disappearance. When Kyle was home, her mother didn’t like anyone he brought around. Now that he was gone, Kyle was remembered as the salvation for Emily’s singleness.
“Mom, you didn’t even like parenting. What’s with the sudden urge for grandparenting?”
“That’s not true! Where do you get such wicked ideas? Mildred said she saw you with some bald man. You’re not dating an old man, are you? There are so many strange men around now. You’ve got to be careful.”
“He’s not bald. He shaved his head. It’s kind of the style now. The youth pastor even did it.”
“What? It’s true then? Emily, that is not the style for Christians. That is the style for hoodlums. I thought you wanted to get married.”
“I do want to get married, Mom.”
“Then the first thing I would suggest is that you find a man who respects his hair.”
Emily giggled. She couldn’t help herself. Each time she tried to stop, she only giggled harder thinking about a man who respected his hair.
“What are you laughing at, young lady?”
“Mom,” she said through laughter, “where does a man who respects his hair hang out? So I know where to look next time.”
“At church. That church has twelve hundred members in it. There are single men there and most of them have hair.”
“There’s one less now since Mike and Grace got married.” Now she was just being ornery, as her mother would say. But did any woman at thirty-two need to be reminded she wasn’t married? “Besides, I met the bald guy at church.”
“So you are dating him?”
“I didn’t say that. I just said that I met this man at Mike’s wedding.”
“So he’s a firefighter!” She emphasized the word firefighter as if Emily was about to be rescued from her spinsterhood.
“No. He’s a landscape artist.”
“A gardener? Oh, Emily, really! You’re a teacher. Your father and I paid good money for your education.”
Yes, he’s a gardener, and he was involved in a drunk-driving accident where he totaled his car and met Mike as a firefighter. It took everything in Emily’s will not to announce the earring or the base-jumping arrest. Kyle’s defiance had taught her mother nothing, and Emily’s certainly wouldn’t change her mind either.
“I’m friends with the man, Mom. Do you remember that Oprah show you sent me on videotape? It said to keep my options open and not to date a man based on his credentials.”
Her mother stammered, “I didn’t mean—”
“How’s Dad doing?”
“He’s fine. Maybe you should move up here with us. There are good teaching jobs in Oregon. The San Francisco area is known for. . .well, you know what it’s known for.”
“I have a good teaching job and I like California. We have sunshine.”
“With your brother gone now, you’re our only hope for grandchildren.”
“And that lowers the odds quite a bit, doesn’t it?”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Mom, Kyle had that kind of personality. People were attracted to him. They wanted to be around his magnetic presence. I’m not like that and I never will be. I’m Emily Jensen, first grade teacher. Let’s just be happy with that, okay? That I’m not serving time in a mental hospital somewhere.”
“I never meant I didn’t think it was possible for you to be married. You’re a beautiful, talented young woman. Surely. . . never mind. I suppose you’re tired of hearing from me tonight. You always respected your brother’s opinion. Do you think things will go anywhere with the gardener?”
“Tomorrow night we’re taking a group of teens to San Francisco for a crab feast and a play.” Emily surprised herself as much as her mother.
“To the city? On a school night?”
Help! I’ve become my mother. That’s exactly what I said to him. “Darin says the kids stay up late regardless, so he’s taking some of them to an African-American playhouse. They are doing a reprisal of the Brer Rabbit folk tales. I’ll have to leave right when school gets out tomorrow.”
“You’re not going to lose your job for this, are you? First, you’re out Sunday night and now you’re talking about leaving right after school. I don’t want to tell you how to run your life, but it’s sounding reckless.”
Emily thought about the endless school nights of planning and how her social life had always taken a backseat to her job. Even her summers were filled with summer school and committees. “Yes, it probably does sound reckless, but I’ve given my life to teaching. They can give me two nights that should be mine, anyway.”
“Does anyone know this man who can vouch for him? It sounds a bit dangerous to head into San Francisco with someone you barely know.”
“Pastor Fredericks vouches for him,” Emily said with satisfaction. “Mom, I’ll call you Tuesday night. I need to call Darin and firm up plans.”
“Very well, but have your cell phone on so I can reach you if necessary.”
“I will for everything except the play, Mom. I love you.”
“We love you too, Dear. I’ll be praying God brings you the man of your heart. And that he has hair!”
“Thank you.” Emily rolled her eyes. “Tell Dad I love him too, and I’ll see you both at Christmas. I’m planning to drive up there.”
“We may see you before then. Your father and I just might show up on your doorstep for a surprise visit soon, so keep the furniture dusted,” she mock-threatened. “Bye, Honey.”
Emily hung up the phone and stared at it for a minute. Before she lost her mettle, she dialed Darin’s number hoping he wasn’t home yet. It was the first time she’d ever called a man, and it didn’t feel right. He answered on the second ring. Emily gnawed on her lip before gaining the courage to speak.
“Darin, it’s Emily.”
“Emily!” He sounded pleased to hear from her, and she meditated on that for a moment. When had anyone been glad to hear from her within the last year?
“Darin, you said you could take two more kids with you if I went to San Francisco tomorrow.”
“Yes! Tell me you’re coming.” His enthusiasm made her smile. How could anyone say no after that?
“I’m coming. I’ll drive home right after school and meet you at the Bayshore House. I’ve tutored there before so I know where it is.”
“No, Emily. I don’t want you there at night. I don’t even want your car there. I’ll pick you up before we get the van. Okay?”
“That would be great.”
“I’ll see you about four. And Emily?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks so much for calling. I’m thrilled you’re coming. It will make the whole night that much better.”
“Bye, Darin.” She drew in a deep breath. Darin made her feel important, just like her brother Kyle always did. There was a gift in that ability.
❧
Darin hung up the phone and raised a fist to the sky. “Yes! Thank You, Lord! She doesn’t hate me.”
He scanned the room of his apartment; emptiness filled the place. Now that most of his belongings were boxed up and ready to move, he wondered if he were doing the right thing. Moving into the Bayshore House seemed like a great idea a week ago. Now he wondered. Emily was everything he wanted in a woman, but she obviously wouldn’t be willing to live in the ghetto should their relationship continue. Would any woman worth having be willing to live there? He shook the thought. He had to rely on God for that.
Thinking back to their uncomfortable silence all the way home from the coffeehouse, he probably didn’t need to worry about Emily and a future. She’d made it pretty clear that his past nixed him as a candidate for marriage after Rich’s discussion of his arrest. It would probably nullify him with any woman worth her salt. He may have become a new creature, but the old one was still there lurking for other Christians to see like a scarlet letter upon hi
s chest.
Images of Angel floated through his mind. There was a time when a beautiful woman like Angel was all he expected, all he could have hoped for. But now he wanted so much more. He wanted a woman that he was proud of on his arm, a woman whose heart highlighted her beauty. Not a woman who would flaunt it at a football game for any old geezer to gawk over. His whole definition had changed, and for that alone he was deeply grateful.
Darin ignored the moving box mess and went to his Bible. He needed confirmation, not questions. When he opened his Bible, a picture of the boys from EPA fell out, and Darin grinned. Those boys needed him. Was there any more confirmation necessary? Wanting Emily was one thing, but it wasn’t enough. He knew the boys were God’s will. He had no idea if Emily was anything more than a fierce desire. Angel had tugged his heart that way once too, and look how wrong that turned out to be.
“Hey!” Jack, Darin’s roommate of four years, slammed the door. “Where you been? At your mom’s this whole time?”
“Nah, I went out with a woman from church.”
“Hope she’s fine-looking, because Angel called while you were gone. She said she had some things of yours she wanted to return.”
Darin sighed. “She’s trying out for the Raiderettes. That’s her big news.”
Jack raised his eyebrows. “Is she now? I wish my dates looked as good as your castoffs.”
Darin didn’t know what to say to that. He remembered the day when all that mattered to him was how many men stared in awe at his date. It sickened him now to think how shallow he’d been. He was still a man, of course. He wanted a woman to be beautiful, but not in the same, showy way. Now he wanted a beautiful woman like Emily, whose dark hair and bright eyes shone with inner beauty. Emily didn’t slather on makeup or cover up all her flaws professionally the way Angel did. There was an honesty to her beauty that stirred him like no woman had before her. Emily would give everything to the man she finally loved. How he wanted to be that man. He turned to face his roommate.
“Angel looks good on the outside, but you want more than that. Trust me.”
“I’m not saying I want to get married or anything. I’m not looking for Mrs. Right. Just Miss Right Now.” Jack laughed in his crude way, and Darin knew it was God’s blessing that they were parting as roommates. Too much of Darin’s past was tied up into this apartment, and Jack would never see the difference in him if he didn’t do something drastic. Like move to EPA to work with troubled youths.
“I’m going out tomorrow night. I’ve met someone, and if you meet her I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t ramble on about Angel.”
Jack cackled. “I’m no stooge. Since when do I ramble on about ex-girlfriends when the new one is in the house?”
“This isn’t a girlfriend. This is something I take very seriously.” He looked at Jack in frustration. “Never mind. Jack, have you noticed anything different about me in the past two years?”
“After your accident you mean? Before or after the conversion?”
“After.”
“Yeah, you never date. Angel was the last woman I ever saw you with, and she didn’t last too long. You’re not going completely choirboy on me, are you? It’s like this religion thing scared away the chicks. That’s enough to scare me away. Have you put a curse on this apartment or something? It seems like forever since either one of us had a date.”
Darin rolled his eyes. “If you read what the Word has to say about how we treat women, how we as men are responsible for how we treat women, you’d flee from this horrible broken life you lead.” He hated giving sermons, but Jack wasn’t listening anyway. Darin could say whatever he wanted.
“Hey, at least I’ve had a few dates lately. It’s not like I’m going to take advice from you.”
Darin dropped his head and shook it back and forth. “I’m praying for you, Dude.” If he wanted confirmation, he had it and then some. These young kids he worked with still had a chance to lead their lives with conviction. He prayed God would show them how through him. Tomorrow night, he’d get to show them how to treat a date. He smiled at the reminder. Hope lived on. But definitely not in this apartment—after two years, Darin was tired of casting pearls before swine.
Six
On Monday afternoon, after a long day of landscaping at a luxury home site, Darin showered and slapped some aftershave on his face. He hadn’t been this excited for a date since. . .well, he couldn’t remember ever being this excited about a date. He checked his watch again, and time seemed to lumber. Only ten more minutes and he could leave to pick up Emily. The phone rang.
“Hello, Darin speaking.”
“Darin, it’s Mike. How are you doing?”
Darin gulped back his emotion. The unwritten guy rule was that you didn’t date ex-girlfriends of buddies. Did Mike know he was seeing Emily? Would Mike offer his blessings? Or think Darin’s history was too dark for the likes of Emily Jensen. “Doing great. How was the honeymoon?”
“The honeymoon was fantastic. Fastest two days we ever spent, but Josh has school, you know. Carmel was incredible. You ever been there?”
“Yeah. My boss sent me for a bonus last year. Heavenly place, but it lacks a little something when you’re alone.”
“I can see that. Listen, we’re going to take a smashed-up car over to Los Altos high school next week, and I was wondering if you’d be willing to talk about your experience.”
Darin paused for a moment. He’d never hesitated to talk about his accident before, since it led to such a radical life change, but now he wondered. What would Emily think of him in her school district? If everyone knew she was dating a former drunk would that stop her? He hesitated.
“I don’t know, Mike. Things are sort of busy right now. I’m working with the kids at Bayshore, getting ready to move and—” He let his voice trail off.
“I completely understand. Fortunately, we have a cache of speakers we can use. I just thought of you because of your testimony. Anytime we can work God into the program, we like that when someone gives proper credit for their life. I’ve got another guy who killed a high school student, but he has a hard time in the high schools for obvious reasons.”
Darin’s heart raced. All those kids, all of them thinking they were invincible, just like he used to think. “Of course I can do it.”
“I didn’t mean to guilt you into it.” Mike laughed.
“Mike, I’m seeing Emily Jensen tonight. I met her this weekend at your wedding,” Darin blurted.
“No kidding? Well, I’ll be. You and Emily. Hey, Grace!” The phone became muffled. “Darin Black is seeing Emily Jensen tonight.”
“That’s wonderful!” Grace said from the background. “Josh would be so excited,” she said, referring to her son.
“Don’t tell Josh!” Darin said. “Emily’s world has been so sheltered. I’m a bit worried about what she’ll think of me being on the drunk-driving speakers’ tour, you know? Do you think that will bother her?”
Mike paused for a long time. “It shouldn’t matter what she thinks. I’ve never seen you care about what anyone thinks when it comes to sharing who you are. Besides, I think you should give Emily a little credit. She may come off as shallow sometimes, but still waters run deep, as they say. Emily’s got a lot of heartache in her past. God has really grown her faith.”
“Yes, she told me about her brother.”
“Her brother, oh, right, that. Emily’s a great gal, Darin. I hope things work out for the two of you.”
“Just let me know the time on that talk, okay?”
“Will do. Grace and I will pray for you and Emily. I’m really happy to hear you’re seeing her. She’s a wonderful woman.”
“I heard that!” Grace called out in mock jealousy.
“But of course not as wonderful as my wife,” Mike said through laughter.
Darin heard a bit of wrestling with the phone, and Grace came on the other end. “I’m kidding, you know. I think Emily is just tops. Anyone who can teach kids all week
long and find the energy to do Sunday school each week has to have sainthood written all over her. Grab her up, Darin!”
“Thanks, Grace. You looked stunning on your wedding day, and you can tell that lug I said so. He doesn’t deserve you. Listen, I’m running late. I’ll see you later.” Darin dropped the phone back into its cradle and checked his tie, which hung crooked. He tried to fix the knot quickly and then grabbed his keys.
He dashed out the door, got into his car and drove the familiar route to Emily’s house. Once there, Darin asked God to be with them all evening. He prayed for safety and bonding between the kids and Emily, and most of all for a fun time in San Francisco. He felt like he was going to his high school prom. For some reason, Emily felt more important than just a standard date. There was something about her eyes. In them, Darin saw a multitude of emotions, and somehow he felt God was actually pointing to her, saying, This is the one.
Emily opened the door and looked radiant. Her skin glowed clean and pink. She appeared not a day over twenty-two, and he almost thought he was robbing the cradle. Her dark hair framed her face and highlighted her striking eyes. Emily Jensen was a sight to behold. Rather than a simple floral dress, she wore a long pantsuit with a fitted jacket that cinched her small waist and strappy heels to match. Although she didn’t show an inch of skin, other than her feet, Darin thought she was sexier than any woman he’d ever laid eyes upon.
He took her hand. “You look absolutely gorgeous.”
She smiled and tossed his hand away. “My brother used to tell me that. I didn’t buy it from him either.” She winked at him and picked up her purse.
He watched her for a moment, not relinquishing his direct gaze. Could she possibly be for real? Didn’t she have any idea what her smile could do to a man? Melt him in his tracks, that’s what. And leave him a pathetic puddle on the porch. His heart thumped wildly, and he wondered if he would have noticed Emily’s quiet beauty before his conversion.
Unbreakable Hope Page 5
