SEALs of Honor: Brett

by Dale Mayer

  And he lowered his head and kissed her.

  She closed her eyes and sank into the sensation. Jimmy had been gone for over two years. Two years since she’d been held by a man in any kind of loving embrace. Two years since anyone kissed her as if he cared. The six months before Jimmy’s death had been rough. Ever since he found out about Jennifer’s impending arrival he’d been pretty distant.

  She almost laughed. Distant wasn’t quite the word. He’d slept on the couch since she told him.

  Brett deepened the kiss, pulling her mind back to him. Unable to help herself she reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck and held him close. She wanted this – him – so much…but she couldn’t relax. She didn’t want to feel awkward but she did, she didn’t want to feel ugly but she did. He lifted his head, his hands coming up to cup her face, and as he gazed into her eyes she knew he could see into her soul. His next words confirmed it.

  “Stop thinking,” he whispered. “Relax. We’re good together. We always have been.”

  He kissed her eyelids. Tiny little feathery brushes across her cheekbones and then her temples. His fingers gently massaged her skull, threading through her hair, the loving caress making her moan.

  Brett knew her well. What she liked. What she needed. Maybe even more than she did. She melted a little more against him only to realize he was walking her backwards to the bed, his erection insistent against her pelvis.

  Her bra and shirt had become trapped between them. But as he dropped her to the bed he whisked the offending material away. And sucked in his breath, his gaze hot.

  Instinctively she covered her breasts.

  “Don’t.” He reached down, his finger slowly peeling her hands away. “Don’t hide. Don’t you understand how beautiful you are right now?”

  She shook her head. Her gaze downcast. “I don’t feel sexy. I feel like a mom. There is something very wrong about a mom feeling sexy.”

  He chuckled. Not a mocking laugh but one full of warm compassion and understanding.

  “You’re so wrong there. You’re the epitome of womanhood. You embrace all that is right about being a mother. You’ve created two beautiful children and the changes in your body are nothing in comparison.” His fingers stroked across the stretch marks on the side of her breast. “They are badges, medals of honor for a job well done.”

  She stared up at him in wonder. “You really mean that?”

  “Absolutely.” He narrowed his gaze at her expression and then sighed. “Jimmy didn’t feel the same way, did he?”

  She shook her head. “He hated how long it took for me to get rid of the baby fat,” she muttered. “Nor did he like the permanent changes from giving birth.” She shrugged. “I tried hard but it didn’t seem to matter. I was no longer the young woman he married.”

  “And you feel like you’re a dumpy old lady that can’t enjoy her body. Who shouldn’t be making love anymore?”

  She dropped her gaze yet again. “When you say it like that it sounds stupid.”

  His fingers stroked up over her ribs to cup her breasts, squeezing them gently, his thumbs rubbing over the taut nipples. His voice dropped to a husky whisper. “It doesn’t matter if it’s stupid or not. It’s how you feel so you have to deal with that. In my opinion you’re just listening to his garbage.”

  He smiled, a corner of his mouth quirking. “You used to love sex. You used to walk around naked, totally relaxed. To see you now so lacking self-confidence, it hurts,” he admitted.

  As she listened to him she could see how Jimmy’s influence had impacted her. It was her fault in that she hadn’t been able to let Jimmy’s comments roll off her back. But over time even a stone wore smooth. And just because she’d acknowledged the problem didn’t mean she was going to be able to get over it and move on just like that.

  But it did mean she no longer had to keep the same beliefs. Brett was right about one thing. She had always been quite comfortable with her body when around him. Now she realized it was more about her lack of self-confidence rather than his acceptance.

  And that was a balm to her aching soul. She smiled, her fingers reaching up to clasp his hands. “Maybe instead of trying to tell me how it used to be,” she whispered, “you should show me how it is now.”

  With his breath mingling with hers, his smooth skin feeling like a heated blanket over her already sensitized skin, he whispered, “With pleasure.”

  It didn’t take long for her to realize she’d forgotten nothing. He’d always made her feel she was the only woman in the world, the most perfect female in the universe. He’d always kept his focus on her. On her pleasure. Her needs. Her body. It was intoxicating. She felt connected and…loved.

  She missed that the most.

  He rolled onto his back, pulling her onto his chest.

  “You’re still wearing too many clothes.” He slipped a finger along her waistband reminding her she’d pulled jeans on before coming to bed with him. She laughed self-consciously but more at herself now.

  Standing up, she shucked off her jeans, kicked them to one side and then with a simple flick of her fingers dropped her panties to the floor. As she stood there she studied his long muscled form.

  “God you’re beautiful,” she whispered reverently.

  He jackknifed into a sitting position and said, “No. You’re the beautiful one.”

  He stood up and kicked off his boxers releasing his erection. She stretched out a hand, unable to resist. Her fingers wrapped around the lean length, loving it when he sucked in his breath. In a surprise move he lifted her off the ground, wrapping her legs around his hips. A shriek of laughter escaped. “I know you’re strong, but this strong?”

  As if challenged he walked several steps to rest her back against the wall, a glint in his eye. “I guess we’ll find out.”

  With his erection teasing the heart of her, she found it hard to keep still. She wanted to lower herself down. But he was holding her too tight to move.

  She wiggled against his hips, trying to loosen up his grasp. He laughed and dropped his head to run kisses down her throat and across her shoulders then back up under her chin.

  She moaned. “God that feels good.”

  “Good. How about this?” He swept a finger between her legs, pinned as she was he had full access and she had none. When he dipped his finger in the moisture and spread it over her sensitive skin she gasped and wiggled harder. Taking his cue from her he slipped his finger in again only to withdraw to circle the nub this time. Then he slipped inside only to retreat. He did it again and again and again. Each time she cried out, her body twisting against the wall, trying to force herself down onto him.

  But he wasn’t having any of that.

  “Damn it, stop teasing me.”

  He laughed hoarsely as he changed her angle and then slowly released his hold. With her back against the wall – she slid down onto him – but only as far as he’d let her. He pinned her again against the wall, not letting her slide any further.

  She leaned forward and bit him on the shoulder.

  He gave a shout of laughter, releasing his grip a little more and she slid lower to his shaft.

  But not quite home. She shuddered. Need clawing at her.

  Well, she could fix that. She leaned forward and pulled his head down for a hot passionate kiss. As she kissed him she released all of the years of pain and guilt. Instantly the void was filled with the drive to be one with him.

  Her hips rocked from side to side, slowly up and down. Her fingers stroking his back before sliding down to cup his heavily muscled cheeks.

  Without warning she dug her nails deep into his skin and tightened her inner muscles – hard.

  “Jesus,” he swore, throwing his head back, his hips slamming her into the wall.

  Driving himself deep inside her.

  Now she was where she wanted to be. With a lusty laugh she used her nails to scrape gently up his back, caressing every inch she could reach as she dropped tiny kisses across his che
st.

  He kissed her again and again, his arms shaking with the need. She leaned forward and gently bit his nipple. And he lost it. His hips slammed into her again and again.

  She reveled in it, matching him thrust for thrust. Tension twisted her insides ever higher.

  He reached down his hands gripping her cheeks, holding her immobile as he pounded into her.

  Harder.

  Faster.

  Higher.

  At the next thrust she exploded, her cries of joy resounding in the bedroom. He immediately clamped his mouth down on top of hers to stifle the noise.

  At which point she remembered the children sleeping in their beds.

  He shuddered, his body plunging one last time as his climax ripped through him.

  She wanted to laugh. She wanted to cry. She wanted to hold him close – forever.

  Slowly recovering, he lifted her higher and carried her to the bed where he laid her down and collapsed down beside her – still joined.

  God, she’d loved this man.

  And maybe still did. Was that possible? Did one stop loving because a relationship stopped? Or was it more a case of when love stopped the relationship did? If so, what the hell had she done and why?

  She’d always loved him. Maybe that was never going to change.

  *

  That was not what he’d expected to happen. But he was pretty damn glad it had. He tucked her close to his side and relaxed.

  “I should get up.” But she didn’t move.

  He kissed her temple gently. “I don’t hear them yet.”

  She yawned. “They’ll be awake soon enough.” Pushing herself up, she sat on the edge of the bed and glanced down at him. “I’m going to sneak in a quick shower.”

  He watched as she made her way to the bathroom, hearing the hot water turn on soon after. She hadn’t sent him an invitation, but it was a great idea.

  He got up, put his boxers back on and wandered out into the small kitchen. He peeked into the kids’ bedrooms, checked they were still asleep then with a smile still on his face, he put on coffee.

  What a difference a day made. This was what his life was going to be like if he got back with Ceci. Trying to find time to be alone because the kids were going to come first. He grinned. It was fun. And as such, what the hell was he doing here? He gave another quick check on the kids, but there was no sign they’d be waking up anytime soon. Good. Back in the bedroom he kicked off the boxers again and stepped under the hot water.

  Ceci let out a startled shriek, followed by laughter as he reached for the bar of soap.

  “I checked on the kids. They’re still sleeping. I put on some coffee. But I figured we might just have five minutes.”

  Her delightful laughter rang through the bathroom. “So now you need only five minutes,” she teased. “I thought for sure the idea was to last longer, not shorter.”

  He chuckled. “Let’s just say I’m adaptable.” With his hand slippery from the soap and her body slick from the water he proceeded to show her how adaptable he was.

  When they finally stepped out of the shower both felt much more at peace with each other and the world.

  He grabbed a towel, quickly got dressed and walked back to the kitchen. He poured two cups of coffee and realized he still wasn’t hearing the children’s voices. Not knowing what their routine was he went to Jennifer’s room and found her bed empty.

  His heart cramped with fear as he raced to Jimmy’s room.

  And found both children asleep on the one bed.

  Only they weren’t alone.

  Chapter 19

  Ceci couldn’t hear the kids. They’d been through so much she didn’t begrudge them a normal sleep. But surely they’d return to a routine soon.

  She wandered into Jimmy’s bedroom, Brett sat on the bed, one hand resting on each child. Jimmy just now rubbing his eyes as he woke up.

  He stood up, his face hard, his gaze cold.

  “Take him out to the kitchen, please.” But his tone was icy and demanding, yet quiet at the same time.

  She stared at him in shock. “What? Why?”

  He cast her a warning look and handed her a sleepy Jimmy. Jennifer slept curled up against Jimmy’s pillows. “Jimmy is looking for food,” he said gently. “I’ll explain in a few minutes.”

  And she had to be satisfied with that. As she held Jimmy she realized something else. His blanket, the one he loved to carry around and sleep with, was covering something very large on the floor. She opened her mouth but Brett said quietly, “Don’t.”

  Her mouth snapped shut as she hurried into the kitchen, but inside tremors were starting. Dear God, what was under that blanket? She hadn’t been away from the kids very long. And Brett had checked on them earlier and said they’d both been sleeping, so what had happened? And when.

  Jimmy yawned. “That lady is really tired. Brett put a blanket on her, so she could sleep.”

  Ceci stiffened in shock, but her voice was calm and quiet when she said, “We all need to sleep sometimes.”

  “We’ve been sleeping lots,” he announced. “And I’m still tired.” He slid down to the floor and walked to the couch. After curling up in the corner, he picked up the remote and put on his cartoons. With a happy sigh he settled back.

  “I thought you were hungry?”

  “I am.” But his attention was riveted to the cartoons. Saturday was always his morning for watching cartoons on the couch. She rarely put a limit to the time because it was only once a week.

  Sure that he was okay she casually went back to his bedroom and found Brett carrying Jennifer. Jennifer gave her a toothy smile and started blowing bubbles. Ceci reached out and accepted the cherub then walked back into the kitchen to put her in the high chair.

  She went through the motions. All she had to do was focus on the routine. To make everything look normal even though it was a hell of a long way from it.

  She could do this.

  She had to do this.

  Ceci put on toast for the two kids and stared out the window.

  Inside she knew what was under the blanket. And it made her sick. She’d known the possibility existed that someone could follow them here. It just never occurred to her anybody would care enough to do so.

  She was nobody. Why come after her?

  When she had a moment she’d ask Brett for an update on the scenario at the embassy. But right now…there was a problem about a woman in her son’s bedroom. Christ. Was she dead? Who the hell was she? And what had she been doing there?

  She quickly buttered and cut Jimmy’s bread into squares and took it out to the couch for him. Normally eating in the living room was not allowed but today…well maybe this would help him.

  With Jennifer happy for the moment gnawing on her toast, she quickly escaped back to Jimmy’s room. She stood in the doorway, her gaze taking in the empty room. Where was Brett? She forced herself to look at the floor. But there was nothing there. And the blanket was missing.

  She knew Jimmy didn’t understand what he’d seen. And she was sure hoping she hadn’t either.

  Back in the kitchen she sat down beside Jennifer and waited for Brett to show up. Two vehicles arrived instead. One a big Jeep and another a big truck. Maybe some of his unit had come to help out. Instead of making her feel better, panic ensued. Dear God, had that really been a woman in Jimmy’s bedroom? And if so, how the hell was she going to keep these kids safe? No one had even heard the woman enter. She could have killed her kids while they slept. She felt ill. If she wasn’t safe in her own home, was she safe anywhere?

  *

  Brett met his team. He took them to the garage where he’d placed the woman’s body. Swede asked, “Is she dead?”

  Brett nodded. “I didn’t mean to kill her. But I gave her a hard chop shot to the throat before she could move. She wasn’t expecting it and dropped like a log.” He shrugged. “Her Glock is beside her.”

  He handed Mason the contents of the woman’s pockets. “This is all I
found on her.”

  Shadow asked, “Any vehicle?”

  Brett shook his head. “I have no idea. I didn’t want to leave Ceci and the kids long enough to look.”

  Shadow nodded and disappeared into the neighborhood.

  Brett watched him. If there was anything, Shadow would find it. Hawk, not saying a word, headed outside in the opposite direction of Shadow. Those two were the best hunters in the group. Brett could only hope they found out if she worked alone. Before someone decided to come back looking for their colleague.

  Mason bent down and pulled the cover back off the woman’s face. He studied her features for a long moment then glanced up at Brett. “Do you know her?”

  Brett nodded. “I don’t know her, but she passed me on the stairs during the embassy attack.”

  “So she is involved.” Mason nodded in satisfaction. He straightened. “Go over it again for us.”

  Just then they both heard a noise at the side door. Brett turned to see Ceci standing there, her hand over her mouth. He opened his arms and she ran into them. She peered down at the woman and shuddered. “It’s true? She really followed us here?”

  Brett nodded.

  “If we’re not safe here, where will we be?” she cried.

  Brett rubbed her shoulders gently. “Go back to the kids, I’ll come in a few minutes and explain.”

  She nodded and ran back inside.

  Brett took a deep breath. “I went to Jennifer’s room but she wasn’t in her bed. I ran to Jimmy’s where both kids were laying on his bed. Jennifer still slept. Jimmy was just about to wake up. The woman couldn’t have been in there longer than five minutes.” He took a deep breath. “I didn’t want him to see her.”

  His fists clenched. “She warned me what would happen if Ceci said anything about what went on at the embassy. I know it was just talk, but she pointed the gun at Jimmy’s head…” he shrugged. “So I attacked.”

  “Looks like you broke her neck,” Swede said.