“Honestly, she wanted the attention and I wasn’t going to give it to her. She was a bitch and I’ve dealt with bigger ones than her, believe me. Once I leave work, she doesn’t enter my mind or play a part in my life. So I didn’t say anything, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you, it’s just not in my nature to tattle.” I wouldn’t tell anyone, I’m hard headed and I deal with things by myself. I’ve never had anyone fight my battles.
Damien sighs and rubs his hands up and down his face, “Fine, I get it, but that doesn’t mean that I have to like it. If anything like this happens again, you tell me immediately. Now go, get ready, you’ll be on stage soon.” I start making my way to the door, when he speaks again, “Saffron, I want to talk to you, so stay.” I throw a look over my shoulder at Damien. He needs to tread extremely careful when it comes to being around her, she’s extremely skittish. “I won’t be keeping her long, as she has to get ready as well.” It’s his way of telling me that he knows not to push her too far.
I nod and give Saff a smile, as I walk out of his office. I make it back to the changing room and see the other girls there. They all look a lot happier; they’ve probably heard that Layla is gone. All I know is that it’s sure going to be different working here without the constant bitchiness.
I change into my costume; it consists of a tight shirt that ties up just under my tits and the shortest skirt that barely covers my knickers. My hair is tied up in pigtails, with bows at the bottom of each pigtail. Saff had better hurry the hell up, she’s on before me and that is in twelve minutes.
I finish putting my makeup on, when Saff comes in with a smile on her face. Whatever Damien did he sure as hell brightened her day. “Jess, help? I’ve got seven minutes before I’m due on!” She cries as she sees the time.
“Okay, get your outfit on; I’ll get everything else ready. Don’t stress, you’ll be ready to go on in time. You know us; we’re ready in less than five minutes most days, we’ve been doing this for so long.” I tell her trying to calm her before she starts to panic even more.
“You’re right. I’ll get changed, will you grab my shoes?” She points to her bag and I see she has new shoes. I wish I could afford some, mine are old but they still look nice. Saff’s are bright red with diamantes around them. They have to at least be seven inch platforms.
“Hey Saff, these don’t have an ankle strap. Have you worn these on the pole before?” I ask while holding up the death traps with my finger. You’d swear I was holding a bomb, the way I’m looking at them.
“Yeah I’ve worn them on the pole before. I actually don’t mind if it doesn’t have an ankle strap. I know that they are a godsend but seriously, my shoes are amazing and so comfy.” She’s in another world as she tells me.
“If you say so, me and my cankles are perfectly happy with ankle straps.” I say huffing. I hate that I’m restricted to the shoes I have to wear. If I were to wear her shoes, no doubt about it, I’d be in A&E within thirty minutes with a broken ankle. I need the ankle strap as extra support so my ankles don’t roll when dancing.
“Okay, I’m dressed, just need my makeup done and to put my shoes on within the next five minutes.” She’s on cloud nine and I can’t wait much longer, I need to know what happened.
“Okay, you do your makeup; I’ll help you put your shoes on.” I look around the changing room and see we are the only ones here. “Okay, so what happened with Damien? You haven’t stopped smiling since you left his office.” I’m being nosey, but I don’t care, this is the first time I have seen her genuinely happy in a very long time. I kneel down and start to help her put her shoes on.
I watch as she has a quick glance around the room too, checking to make sure that no-one else is around. “He asked me out. We’re going on a date on Monday.” She sounds so happy.
“About bloody time, I was wondering when he’d finally ask you.” I say as I put the shoes on the floor, helping her get into them.
“What do you mean about time?” She sounds so confused, bless her.
“For as long as I’ve known Damien, I’ve known that he’s been into you, you’ve just been oblivious to it.” I sit back on my heels and stare at her.
She looks shell shocked, “But Jess, how did I not know?” She sounds as if she’s about to cry.
“Don’t cry love, he didn’t know that you liked him, so you’re both as bad as each other.” I smile up at her and that’s all she needs to smile too.
She’s finished and ready to go on stage with a minute to spare. “Thanks Jess, I really appreciate it.” She wraps me up in a hug.
“You’re very welcome, but you actually didn’t need me in the end. You better go, knock ‘em dead! Hopefully there’s rich guys out tonight, I need some serious tips.” I tell her while crossing my fingers. She laughs but quickly rushes out of the room. I hate that I have to scrimp and save for every little thing. When I was growing up, I told myself that when I grew up and had kids, I’d have the best job in the world and I’d make sure my kids had everything they needed. I can barely do that.
The tune to Britney’s ‘Breathe On Me’ play’s through the speakers and the bass starts to jump. This song is amazing and I love it, it was going to be the song I chose but I came across something that suited me better. I have three minutes and forty seconds until I’m up. Even though I have been doing this for years, I still get butterflies in my stomach just before I’m due on stage.
I’m sitting watching the door, listening to the reaction that Saff’s getting and by the sound of things, it’s quite busy for a Wednesday night. I hear Britney coming to an end, so I stand and my legs feel like jelly. I start to stretch them out, doing lunges and squats. If anyone was to come in and see me they’d think I’d lost my mind, doing exercise in my eight inch platforms.
“You got your wish love, there’s loads of rich men sitting front row.” Saff says as she rushes in, clothes and tips in hand, she’s just wearing her tiny thong and shoes.
“Good. Okay, here I go!” I tell her dramatically and she laughs.
I walk out and onto the stage, the lights are dimmed and I take a deep breath, steadying myself as I get ready. The opening bars to ‘Ride’ by Ciara and Ludacris starts up and my body so use to this routine starts to move, hips swaying and then the lights go on, putting me in the spotlight. I start on the stage just dancing, grinding against the pole. I do the splits and go down to the stage floor.
I get lost in the music, I start to do the carousel spin and then into the Gemini handstand, this routine is jam packed; there is no let up and it’s just the way I like it. It keeps my mind busy, always thinking of the next move so I don’t get distracted. My shirt is the first bit of clothing that I lose. The song lasts for four minutes, the ending is coming up and it’s time for my finale.
I do the arch back slide, then the corkscrew spin, into the reverse stage spin. My skirt is already off and all that is left for me to take off is my bra. I walk around the pole and go into the crucifix move when I’m up there I manage to unhook my bra, and since there are no straps it just falls to the ground. I end my routine with the final three moves, the handstand with foot on pole then into the batman, and finally, back into the arch back slide to the floor.
The lights go out on the stage and I quickly put on my shirt which is nearest to me, then gather the rest of my clothes, thankfully I’m so used to wearing these shoes that I can run in them. I gather up all the tips and there are a lot of them. Hopefully I made a decent amount.
Saff’s waiting for me in the changing room, she’s fully dressed and still smiling. “Hey, great routine, I actually got to watch it for once. You need to teach me the Batman move. It looks killer.” She always wants to learn new moves.
“There’s a pole dancing class that I have been interested in, I just need the money to pay for it. It’s on a Tuesday morning if you’re interested?” I’d love to go, but I wouldn’t want to go on my own.
“Hmm, sounds really good but as you said, it depends on how much
it is. I made three hundred pounds tonight. I hope the men are back again this weekend, Friday and Saturday are our busiest nights and our biggest tip days.” She’s musing out loud, she does that a lot.
“You know what, meet me here tomorrow. We’ll work on your routine and see what we can add to it.”
“Jess, that would be great, are you sure?” She sounds so hopeful.
“Yeah love, as soon as I get the kids off to school, I’ll meet you here.” She nods and I quickly change into my normal clothes and count out my tips. I made four hundred and fifty pounds. I haven’t made that much on a Wednesday night in a long time. We both are ready to leave and I’m not surprised to see it’s Damien that is giving us both a lift home. The ride home is awkward as neither of them know what to say. I’m dropped off first, I say goodnight to them and make my way upstairs, keeping my promise of letting Si know I’m home. He was fast asleep, so that’s both of us that kept our promises. I crawl in bed beside Emme, who’s sprawled out and fast asleep. It doesn’t take me long to follow.
Chapter Four
“Ready to get started?” I ask Saff as soon as we’re in the club. No use standing around, this could take hours to get right. It needs to be practiced continuously so that you know it down to your bones.
“Yeah Jess, I’m ready.” She’s dressed for a workout, in her sports bra and leggings. Her red hair is up in a ponytail and she’s got a bottle of water with her; she’s ready to put in some serious effort.
Unlike me who’s in a tight tank, jeans, with my favourite knee high boots. I’m not changing my routine and I’ll only be showing her how to do some moves so I won’t be getting sweaty. “Okay, so what do you want to learn?”
“I don’t know something different, sexy even. I love dancing and I love the way it makes me feel, like I don’t have to hide who I am. Dancing is in me and it sets me free. I sound silly don’t I?” She always ducks her head when she thinks she’s done something or said something wrong.
“I completely understand. We have to feel sexy someway. Me, I feel sexy when I put on my high heels and dance, or when I’m dressed up. You let loose dancing, I let loose spending time with my family.” I shrug my shoulders. There’s no need to be ashamed of anything we do. “Okay, let’s get you warmed up first, do a few twirls on the pole.”
She does as I ask and I can understand the appeal of watching someone pole dance. It’s really sensual and obviously when you strip it becomes sexual. Once she done the twists I watch as she does the chair spin followed into the backward spin.
We’ve been at it for over four hours and she’s nailed the banana splits, which is really tough; you've to do the splits sideways. Saffron will be hurting tomorrow from that move alone. I've showed her how to do the Iron X which is holding on to the pole with your arms out, one holding the bottom, the other holding the top and doing the splits outwards. It’s hard to do and it’s an extreme move. It’s taken her ages to get the right grip on the pole to do this right, but the last three times she’s nailed it.
My phone rings and I walk over to the bar where I left it to see that it’s the boys school calling. I answer the phone and Saffron turns off the music. I give her a smile in thanks.
“Miss Hughes, its Mr Hendry. I’m calling due to the fact that both of your brothers have been involved in an incident. We need you here to sort it out.” Fucking hell, Hendry is still the head teacher? I thought Si told me the old bugger had retired.
“I’m on my way, are the boys okay?” I’m shaking. I’ve never been called in before, and I didn’t know they had my number.
“Yes Miss Hughes, both Simon and Anthony are fine.” He’s very sharp on the phone, basically he hasn’t changed a bit. He was the same way when I was at school there.
“I won’t be long.” I hang up wondering how the hell am I going to get there quickly? I suppose I’ll have to call a cab.
“Is everything okay?” Saffron’s voice pulls me from my thoughts and I completely forgot that she was here. “Are the boys okay?” She too is worried and she wasn't even on the phone.
“I don’t know he said they’re fine but have been in an incident. I’ve to go to the school, I need to get a cab.” I’m talking to myself now. It's like I have a checklist in my mind that I need to check off as I go.
“I’ll bring you. Saff you’ll be okay here on your own? I’ll lock up behind me so no one can come in. Jess I’ll take you to see your brothers.” Damien says and I wonder just how long he was standing in the shadows for? “Saff will that be okay? Or do you want to come with us?”
He’s being sweet to her, I smile at her and see that she too has a massive smile on her face. “No, lock me in please, I want to get this move down before I leave.” She’s already turned back to the sound system and puts the music back on.
I don’t wait around, I pick up my phone and keys and start to leave, not giving Damien any chance of a reprieve before we leave. He locks the door behind us and we walk into the garage. It's a shame he brought his BMW, sometimes he'll bring his Porsche. I like the Porsche. Can you imagine the looks I'd get? We don't talk except for me to tell him the name of the school. I’m nervous, I don't know what's going on, and I don’t like it. I’m picking at the scab I’ve got on my wrist from where I was bitten by an insect. It hurts like hell so I start rubbing my hands together, anything to take my mind off it.
As I get out of the car, Damien tells me he’s going to wait for me. I’m rude as I just nod and rush through the school gates. I’m going to have to apologise to him once I'm finished in here. I walk into the reception area of the school and nothing has changed in the five years I’ve been gone. “Mr Hendry will be with you momentarily.” the receptionist tells me whilst looking me up and down like I’m a piece of shit.
I ignore her and wait, although it’s not that long until Mr Hendry sticks his head out of his office door and crooks his finger at me to come. He opens the door to let me in and my eyes do an instant sweep of both boys. My relief is instantaneous as I see for my own eyes that they’re okay, except for a few cuts and bruises. Tony’s had a nose bleed, but it doesn’t look too bad. As I walk into the room, all the air in my lungs vanishes as I see who’s sitting in the chair. Of all the people, it had to be Hunter’s brother that gets into a fight with mine. Where the hell is that mother of theirs?
I suck in a deep breath hoping to refill my lungs with Oxygen. “Jess" is the sneer from Hunter and my heart breaks. Here in the flesh, is the man that I love and he’s still a complete bastard.
“Hunter" is my dismissive reply as I walk to my brothers and stand beside them. Si instantly takes my hand and squeezes it. I can’t believe it; I think I’m in complete shock.
“Thank you for finally joining us Miss Hughes.” Mr Hendry snidely says. “Now, this school has a strict no fighting policy. Miss Hughes both of your brothers were involved in a fight,” He tells me and for some reason looks pretty fucking pleased with himself as he does.
I look at the boys, who both look regretful. I’m so deeply disappointed in them. I’ve always told them to be the bigger men and walk away. “What happened?” I ask Si, because Tony looks as if he’s about to cry.
“Does it matter what happened? They broke the school rules.” Dickhead Hendry says.
“I’m sorry, was I talking to you?” That shuts the bastard up. I’m sick of people thinking just because we’re on benefits that we’re either stupid or we’re not good enough for them. If it isn’t thinking we’re trash, then they think we’re leeches on the system. Hell, I’ve even had someone assume that Simon has an ASBO. Arseholes hear that I’m a single mum on benefits and think that my kids are uneducated lowlifes, those arseholes include the twat that I’m staring at. He discriminates his pupils, anyone who doesn’t have money; he doesn’t give a fuck about.
“Well? I’m waiting.” I look at Si who’s on edge. “Why the hell were you fighting?” I’m getting angrier the more I look at them; they both look like they went ten rounds. Si’s sh
irt is ripped and poor Tony, he took some beating.
“He called you a whore.” is the response I get and I’m fuming. The cheeky bastard, it’s partly his brother’s fault that I’m a pole dancer. “He told the whole lunch hall that we’re poor and that you’re a whore. He’s been saying stuff to us for months, just because his brother plays football, he thinks he’s God's gift. He always picks on Tony, you’d think that he would have been taught not to be mean to people weaker than him.” Si says and looks ready to go again.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Hunter asks, looking directly at me.
I don’t know how, but somehow I manage to ignore him, “Si, remember what I told you, you don’t fight, especially when someone called you names. I’m so disappointed in you.” I turn to Tony who looks like he’s about to cry. “The pair of you. I can't believe this. Even if he’s a twat.”
“They are both suspended and this is their final warning. They get into trouble again, they’re expelled. Do you understand?” Mr Hendry says. He’s one smarmy prick.
“Yes and what about him?” I nod my head over to Hunter’s brother Lewis.
“What about him?” Dickhead Hendry replies and I see Hunter leaning forward to see what I’ve got to say.
“This school also has an anti-bullying policy. From what I hear you’ve not been implementing that. What is the school Governor going to think when I go to them with this bullshit?” I ask him and he knows full well that he’ll be fucked from here to Sunday, the amount of times he’s been reported and the fucker is still here. However, this year there’s a new Governor.
“My brother isn’t the one in the wrong here.” Hunter tells me, looking quite confused.
The Secrets of Life Page 3
