Love From the Ashes

by Cheryl Persons

  “Some guys just can’t get the message.” She laughed, but then the room grew still. “Um…” when her eyes met his he started to chuckle. “I’m sorry. How was the rest of the evening?”

  By the way he was awkwardly playing with his pizza; Rebecca could tell that that wasn’t really where he wanted the conversation to go. “You mean after I faked being sick?” She smirked. “Let’s just say it wasn’t one of my finest nights.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  She smiled; he was being more real in that moment than any other guy she had talked to in such a long time. “Thank you!”

  “This is good pizza;” he mumbled. Obviously, he wanted to change the topic.”

  “Yeah; Antonio’s Pizzeria is the only place I go. Do you want something to drink? I have soft drinks, water, or I can make coffee.”

  “Anything would be fine.” His voice remained quiet and he appeared to be avoiding eye contact.

  She grabbed a couple of drinks out of the refrigerator and gave him some ice. “Okay; we can beat around the bush as much as we want to; the point is you wanted to get together for a reason. It wasn’t to talk about my evening last night, or to discuss the pizza. What did you want to say?” He smiled at her and she saw a light shade of red pass over his cheeks. There was definitely something on his mind, and she was ready to hear him tell her what it was.

  ____________________

  After sitting there and talking to Rebecca, he suddenly forgot why he wanted to talk to her. Well, he didn’t really forget; he just was beginning to rethink it. He had a foolish notion that he needed to apologize for calling her beautiful, but it didn’t even seem to affect her as much as he thought it did. He had come to the conclusion that he was making it a much bigger problem than it needed to be. Who cares if he gave her a compliment; it wasn’t going to change their relationship. They were fast becoming friends and he needed that. He liked being around Rebecca and it would have caused more pain than anything else; had he told her that he was sorry for saying she was beautiful. He was crazy to think that would have been a good idea. Yet, here he was with her staring at him and he had nothing profound to say. “I…” he turned away. He was at a loss for words, for the first time in his life. She started to laugh and he faced her. “What’s so funny?”

  “You look like you have just eaten the last piece of chocolate and you’re about to be in trouble.”

  He smiled. “I look that bad?”

  “Well, your face is a little green; you kind of look like you’re about to be sick. You know I am here if you need to talk and by the look on your face…you need to talk.”

  He sat back and his eyes slowly went to her lingering gaze. “Have you ever had a friendship that came by such a surprise that you didn’t know how to handle it?”

  Rebecca nodded. “I suppose I have.”

  He had something to say; he just needed to come out with it. “Promise me you won’t think I’m losing my mind?”

  She smiled. “I promise.”

  “In these past few weeks, I have shared more with you than any other person; outside of my wife and kids. I feel like we have known each other for years, and I don’t know how to feel about that.”

  “I know what you mean.” The words were a whisper, but he heard them clearly.

  “So, you feel it too?”

  She slowly nodded and he smiled. “Thomas, it would be pretty hard not to; I watch your kids and I have gotten to know all of you.”

  “I enjoy spending time with you Rebecca; I can’t deny that, but things aren’t easy in my life. I have a lot of stuff to figure out; although, I don’t want to lose this.”

  “Everyone needs someone they can talk to. I am willing to be that someone for you.”

  “You mean we can be friends; without everything getting complicated?”

  “I’m not here because I expect anything in return; I don’t. I’m here because I think that we do have the potential to be great friends.” Thomas smiled. Then a thought came to him and he covered his face. “What?”

  “Are you saying that I’ll be put in the same classification as Mr. Gregory?”

  Her eyes got big and she started to laugh. “I like Adam, but things get really awkward when we’re together. With you, it’s different.”

  It made Thomas feel good to hear her say that. Besides, with him he’ll always be pushing for us to have something more. You won’t do that; I feel safe with you.”

  “I’m glad to hear that Rebecca. I feel blessed that we have gotten to know each other. My kids love you; you really make them feel special.”

  She looked down and he saw the crimson color on her cheeks. He hid his smile, but he liked that about her; she was so sweet. “They are special.” She wouldn’t make eye contact with him, but he heard the tenderness behind those words.

  “Well, thank you! Speaking of my children,” he laughed. “I have decided to take off a week from today and we’re going to go camping. I think they’ll enjoy it and if we don’t go soon we might as well kiss this year goodbye. I thought we could leave right after they get off school; so, I won’t need you on that evening.”

  “How fun; you guys will have a blast.”

  “So, you have been camping before?”

  She nodded. “When I was younger, my parent’s always took my brother’s and me to a state park about an hour from our house. It was a lot of fun. Where are you guys going?”

  “I’m not sure; I really just made the decision today. I haven’t even told the kids yet.”

  “They will love that; those tents will come in handy.”

  Thomas laughed. “I know; it was my best purchase.”

  Her eyes gleamed as they continued to talk about the days she went camping with her family. “There was a rope that would hang from this one tree. We would swing from it and see who could get the farthest in the lake. Well, Robbie had just started to swing back and forth when the rope broke away from the tree. He didn’t make it to the water.” Her eyes glazed over and he worried that she would start to cry.

  “Was he hurt?”

  She shook her head. “Just bruised and his ego was probably hurt the worst.” She laughed. “Our mom was so furious. She told just that she knew something like that would happen. We weren’t allowed to ever climb on the rope again; even when it was fixed. Dad tried to tell her that we were kids; it was bound to happen. However, she wouldn’t hear anything to change her mind. It was okay, because there were lots of fun things we could do; especially in the woods.”

  “How old were you when that happened?”

  “Probably about 8 years old.” She smiled. “Robbie could also tell the best ghost stories. I was never good at those.”

  “It sounds like you have a lot of good memories growing up.” Thomas could see the pain as she talked about Robbie; it made him wish that much more that he could do something to help her get closure.

  “I do, but speaking of stories. I seem to remember you saying that you will share some stories about your kids.” She crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows. “I would love to hear them.”

  He started to laugh. She had a good memory. It was a tricky one; there were so many stories to share. “Let’s see…” he thought about it and then started to snicker. “There was this one time that Kari and her friend Jasmine decided they wanted to get rich quick and they decided to set up a lemonade stand outside of our house. They were about 6 years old. Now, as you know, Avery is a very small town. Our house wasn’t on a very busy street and the chances of having a lot of sales…well; let’s just say we had a better chance of seeing snow in July.” He laughed. “I think I drank about 30 glasses before they realized that they made enough money.”

  Rebecca giggled. “What did they want to buy?”

  “They wanted to buy a dollhouse. They lived just down the street from each other; they decided that they could share it.”

  “They bought a dollhouse after selling a 30 glasses of lemonade?”

  “You know p
rices, they’re always going up.”

  She laughed. “You have a point there. What’s funny is you basically just bought them the dollhouse.”

  “It was worth seeing their faces as they played with that dollhouse day in and day out. “After the fire, when we moved, Kari told Jasmine she could keep the dollhouse. She wanted her to have something to remember her by.”

  He saw a tear in Rebecca’s eye. “That’s sweet to have a friendship like that.”

  He nodded. It still tore him up that he had to take them away from the friends they had grown so close to. “I was thinking of telling Kari and Bethany that they could each bring a friend when we go camping. What do you think?”

  “Well, I’m thinking that you’re a brave soul Thomas.”

  “Maybe, but they have been so cooperative about this move. I thought it would be a little award. Frankie, Joey, and Judy are so close to in age that they could easily have fun together. I think that it would reiterate the fact that I appreciate how much the older two have done to help.”

  “I still say you’re a brave soul;” she laughed. “To watch 7 kids, alone…” she paused for a moment and shrugged. “If anyone could do it, it would be you.”

  “They would be excited.” He had contemplated asking her along, but he was afraid that would be too friendly. He didn’t want to scare her off; especially when they had just formed this bond. It would be best to just plan on going crazy with 6 girls and 1 boy, lost in the woods. It was either going to be really fun; or really chaotic. Either way it was going to be one story to tell.

  Chapter 12

  Thomas glanced at his watch; he hadn’t expected to stay at her house so late. He was glad that Cassie and Seth had agreed to watch the kids at their place. When he opened the door he noticed how quiet the house was; it didn’t surprise him, since it was going on 11:00. He had figured that his children were already asleep. Seth looked up when Thomas walked into his living room. “Did you have a fun night?”

  Thomas nodded and fell into the chair. “I’m beat. Where’s Cassie?”

  “Since we had two cars here she took Savannah and went home.”

  “What time did the party wind down?” Thomas asked with a yawn.

  “Well everyone, except for Bethany, fell asleep by 8:30. Bethany watched a movie in her room and I just checked on her; she’s sound asleep. I don’t think it’s been for long.”

  “I appreciate you watching the kids tonight.”

  He hadn’t told Seth or Cassie why he needed to talk to Rebecca and they didn’t ask. He suspected that Seth thought something was going on between them, but he didn’t say anything if he did. “It’s no problem. How’s Rebecca doing?”

  Thomas looked at Seth and smiled. “She’s doing well; I reckon, but I can’t read her mind.”

  Seth laughed at that response. “I never could either.”

  Thomas had a lot of things he wanted to ask Seth about Rebecca, but he was always worried that it would be crossing the line. At that late hour, Thomas didn’t worry about any of that. He just put his foot on the gas pedal and went. “Would you like some coffee?”

  Seth laughed. “Why? Are you going to keep me here all night?”

  Thomas sighed and stood up to go to the kitchen. “Possibly; so, what do you say?”

  “Sure; I could use a cup.” He followed Thomas into the kitchen and Thomas busied himself to making the coffee. “What’s on your mind?”

  “I don’t know; to tell you the truth. Tonight I told Rebecca that I feel like a friendship is forming between us, but…”

  “But…”

  “It could be more.” When he spoke the words, he couldn’t turn to look at Seth. He was worried about what he was thinking; after all Seth dated Rebecca for awhile and it was kind of like his territory.

  Thomas turned to Seth and shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m conflicted, because she’s a great girl; I will admit to that. I just don’t want to see her get hurt.”

  “Who do you think is going to get hurt; you or her?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Are you afraid that you’ll let your guard down and she won’t reciprocate any feelings that you have?”

  He thought about that for a moment and while it was possible; he didn’t think that was his problem. “I don’t know; you tell me. Do you think she could ever fall for a guy like me? You probably know her better than anyone. What do you think?”

  “I think that it’s a possibility, but there’s just one thing.” Thomas raised his eyebrows to show that he was interested in him going on. “Are you falling for her?”

  Thomas snickered. “There were moments when I thought I might, but then I look back and realize that what I had with Scarlett was too precious to forget. I then kick myself for even thinking about her as more than a friend.”

  “You can’t put off moving on, because of the past. Scarlett wouldn’t want you miserable and I have told you that many times.”

  “Yeah; so has Cassie.”

  “Then what’s the problem? Maybe you need to explore the feelings that you think you might have.”

  “Or…maybe I should just forget it and realize that it’s a crazy notion that I have.”

  ‘Why would you want to do that?”

  “I don’t want anyone hurt and I feel that if I press forward and it doesn’t work out someone is going to pay the price. Not to mention, that someone could be my children. She is too much of an integral part of their lives now. Let’s say that we started to date and found out that we make much better friends than a couple. What would happen then? She could decide that she wanted nothing to do with me or my kids and they would be the ones to ultimately pay the price. I can’t take that chance.” He poured Seth a cup of coffee and put it on the table. “Besides…” he turned to him and cocked his head in wonderment. “Why would you be pushing for me to get involved with your ex?”

  Seth’s eyes got big and Thomas feared that he had gone one step too far. “Wow; I didn’t see that coming.” The sarcasm was evident in his voice as Thomas turned away from him. He could feel his heart beating fast and his palms were so sweaty that if he would have attempted to grab a coffee mug it would have fallen to the ground. “Despite what you may think; we broke up on good terms. I thought you knew that.”

  “I did.” Thomas kept his back to Seth as he waited for him to continue.

  “I want her happy, because of what I have seen happen to her in her life. I didn’t intentionally want to hurt her, yet that’s exactly what happened. She broke up with me, but only because she knew I couldn’t get past losing Cassie. She broke up with me because she has a big heart and she knew that I was in a relationship that I wanted out of. I loved Rebecca, but the love we shared was different from anything I have had with Cassie. She knew that and I knew that. She was trying to be fair. It’s because of that, that I want to see her finally get her happy ending. Can you at least understand that?”

  Thomas looked at him and nodded. Everyone deserved to be happy at some point in their lives, but he knew he already had that. “I’ve married the love of my life; now that she’s gone I think that it would be disrespectful to her to move on.”

  “I suppose that’s something that you’ll have to find out on your own. Again, I stand by the fact that, she wouldn’t want you to spend the rest of your life sad and alone.”

  Thomas, in his heart, knew that Seth was right. Scarlett would understand if he found someone else, but even 2 years couldn’t erase the pain that he felt when she died. He could live the rest of his life with only his children by his side. “Let’s talk about something else.” Thomas quietly poured himself a cup of coffee and sat across from Seth. “Did you guys have fun tonight?”

  Seth smiled; by the look in his eyes Thomas could tell he was still unsure about what they had just discussed. “We did;” his face fell and when he looked at Thomas; he saw concern across his eyes. “I think they’re missing you. It’s no fault of yours, but you don’t get to spend very much time wit
h them.”

  Thomas felt bad to hear Seth say that. It made him come to the realization that Seth was absolutely right. “I should have stayed home tonight; this is another reason why I don’t have time to get into a relationship. My kids have to come first and all of the extras need to be put on the back burner.”

  “That’s not what I’m saying. You have to have a life, but when I talk to the kids I just sense they wish you could spend more time with them. They were glad you went to Rebecca’s tonight.”

  “They were?”

  Seth laughed. “In the words of Bethany, and I quote, I like Rebecca; she’s good for dad.”

  “Seth, is this another ploy to get me to…”

  “Thomas, I am only speaking the truth. They all adore Rebecca, but they all want some time with you. They think that you work too hard.”

  “Well, actually…I am taking next Friday off. I have decided to go camping with the kids. I need to some quality time with them too. I am going to even invite a friend for Bethany and Kari.”

  “Wait a minute; you’re saying that you are going to go camping with 7 kids?”

  Thomas nodded. “Why are you and Rebecca so shocked?”

  Seth laughed; “Um, because it’s 1 adult and 7 kids. Don’t you think that’s a bit too…too…”

  “Nuts?” Thomas finished with a smirk.

  “I guess you could say that. I just…more power to you.”

  “Thank you! I think that the kids will enjoy themselves. They’ve never been camping.”

  “Camping?”

  He looked up as Bethany entered the kitchen. “Were you eavesdropping? I thought you were asleep.”

  She shook her head. “I thought I heard you were home. I wasn’t eavesdropping; I just couldn’t help but hear. When are we going to go camping?”

  “We are going to go next weekend. I thought you could invite a friend.”

  “Can I invite Rebecca?”

  He laughed and caught the look on Seth’s face. “I was thinking of a friend more your age.”

  Her smile turned to a frown. “I like Rebecca. Why can’t she come?”