Undead Honeymoon

by Quinn, Austin

  I’ve noticed my appetite has been increasing lately. This morning I had two fried eggs, bacon, sausage, and two pieces of jelly toast. Even Finn was impressed, and he’s nothing short of a garbage disposal. I think my body might be preparing for the cruise, which is a good thing since Finn said there are over a dozen scheduled times a day we can eat.

  “And that doesn’t even include all the specialty restaurants,” he’d added.

  Speaking of the food, I’m so glad there’s a gym on the ship; I got Finn and I into a good routine the last six months, and I’ve become somewhat obsessed with staying in shape. The only difference between us is I’m more interested in staying toned, and he’s all about gaining more muscle. Men.

  If he eats as much as he says he does on cruises, he’ll have more mass than he knows what to do with.

  Only eight more days!

  August 5th

  Mondays are so much fun. Not.

  I took two finals today: chemistry and communications. As if that wasn’t enough, Mrs. Grissom surprised the class just before handing out our scantrons.

  “I’ve decided to add a couple more questions concerning molar mass and percent composition, so don’t forget to check your work, because I won‘t!”

  What she didn’t tell us was that her usual three question extra credit section toward the end had been taken off. I don’t think I needed it, but she could’ve warned us. Mrs. Grissom is also the only teacher who makes her students come in to take the exams. Every other class I have is strictly online, no face to face.

  All that’s left is my biology final. I’m so glad I decided to take three classes instead of four this summer. I was really close to signing up for anatomy.

  I think vacation mode is starting to hit me, because after my chemistry final I had the urge to just sit around the house and do nothing. I worked past it, though. I swept out and reorganized the laundry room. Fizz and Gig have made it their second home, and if we don’t keep up on it, all that’s left is a pile of smelly old laundry and cat hair. The same thing happened last year when we went to the Keys with Finn’s family. When we got home, the laundry room was downright scary. I wanted us to go to the Keys again this year, but Finn was adamant about going on the cruise instead.

  “It’s our honeymoon, Lily,” he’d said. “It should be just you and me. We don’t want a lot of family around.”

  I knew he just wanted more “alone time,” but I couldn’t really argue after he showed me pictures of the ship. The Ferris wheel was just the tip of the iceberg. The Wellspring had twenty four hour room service, jacuzzis, gourmet dining at every corner, and Broadway production shows almost every night.

  “We should start saving more after the cruise,” Finn said as he avoided eye contact.

  I snorted. “You’re lecturing me about saving?” I responded, questioning whether Finn meant that he was the one that needed to be smarter about money. I was definitely the frugal one, and I handled all the bills.

  He shrugged. “I’m toning down my impulse buys.”

  I didn’t berate him too hard, mainly because I can tell he’s been worried lately. Tuition hit us hard this year. We both took online classes to save on time and gas money, but it hasn’t helped as much as we hoped it would. The wedding put us in debt even further, but if Finn ever regretted it, he never let it show. “Best day of my entire life, and worth every penny,” was always his response.

  “We’re getting along just fine, and you never know, you could be at Harris or even NASA by this time next year,” I said as I gave him a wink.

  He closed his laptop and leaned in to kiss me. “One could hope.”

  Finn has changed his major three times, but he’s finally settled (I think) on engineering. I think it’s a good fit. He’s always been creative, and he’s one of those weird people who love math and physics.

  I’m doing slightly better than he is. I’ve only switched majors once… but I don’t think I’ll be switching again. Psychology is so fascinating; I can’t imagine another subject being nearly as appealing. Finn says it’s perfect because I’ve always been good at listening to other people’s problems.

  August 9th

  Long day.

  Our suitcases are packed, animals are all at my sister’s house, and I’ve scrubbed everything from top to bottom. I really want us to come home to a clean house. I still have to think of a way to repay Jenna for watching all the pets. I know she won’t accept money, and she insisted we let her take care of them. We would’ve spent a bundle on a kennel for a week with two cats and a monster dog.

  “So is the horse tranquilizer in the bag in case Sokka decides to break out and go on a rampage?” she joked. Her hands shook as she attempted to grip the heavy, double layered leash. Sokka wasn’t paying her any attention. He was too busy exploring the exciting new adventure that was my sister’s house.

  “I wish. I’ve got a bag of treats in there for him, and if you get in a bind you can always get an ice cube. I toss one in the direction I want him to go; works every time.”

  I was still feeling guilty after I left, but I figured taking her shopping in Orlando would make up for it. Some ‘girls only’ time would do us both some good. We don’t get out nearly as much as we used to.

  Finn is still at work. I’m writing now in case I don’t get the chance until we’re on the ship. I’m really tired, too, so it’ll probably be an early night. Who would’ve thought getting ready to relax would be so much work?

  I know Finn will scold me for how many shoes I’m taking, but I don’t care. I think I’m doing just fine with four sets of heels, a set of sneakers, and my good pair of flip flops. I ended up packing Finn’s shoes, too. He wouldn’t even take his dress shoes if he had it his way. He’d be happy wearing flip flops every day, even during formal night. I still can’t believe he tried wearing swimming trunks to our date night in the Keys last year. I was so mad!

  I wonder what Jamaica will be like… or Haiti for that matter. I didn’t even know people went to Haiti on vacation. When I asked Finn he said it’s a small portion just off the North coast of the country. Apparently it has been sanctioned off by Imperial Cruise Lines and made into a luxury resort and tourist attraction. I booked us on a jet ski tour while we’re there. Finn thinks he’s going to drive, but I think I’ll make him share the wheel. Do jet ski’s even have steering wheels?

  Hubby’s home!

  The Lap of Luxury

  August 10th

  Day one of our honeymoon! How could a day that seemed so long go by so fast at the same time? I feel like I blinked twice and it was already dinner time.

  Finn and I got up super early; we were both too excited to sleep.

  “We still have hours until we have to leave. Want to go out for breakfast?” I asked timidly as he fumbled through the kitchen pantry. I didn’t feel like trying to stomach one of his breakfast concoctions, especially before boarding a ship.

  “Actually I was going to try gravy and biscuits again,” he said. “I think I’ve got it down.”

  “Are you really going to make your wife sick before the ocean has its chance?”

  I couldn’t help but shudder as I remembered what the last batch was like. How could someone make gravy that came from a packet taste like burnt silly putty? And how do I know what burnt silly putty tastes like?

  “I love you, but I don’t feel like trying to survive another culinary experiment right before a cruise.”

  Finn‘s shoulders drooped as he closed the pantry. “What did you have in mind?”

  “Well,” I began, “I sure could go for some hot chocolate.” I gave him my best smile, the one I reserve especially for him. He calls it my siren look.

  “If we ever have kids, I really hope we don’t have a girl,” Finn said as he grabbed the car keys from the hook near the pantry.

  “Why not?”

  “Because she’ll have me just as wrapped as you do, probably more,” he said dryly.

  I couldn’t help but smile, partly
because it was true. I could just picture a little girl having him at her beck and call by the time she was old enough to lift her head. It would mean I’d have to be the strict parent in the relationship. Maybe it would be better if we had a boy first.

  Finn didn’t have to ask where I wanted to go. The second I said hot chocolate he knew I wanted our favorite breakfast spot, “Honestly Appetizing”. It’s a quaint little mom and pop shop near the ocean. The restaurant used to be a small beach house, and the owners simply gutted it and stuck a dozen or so tables inside. It’s a very cozy place to sit and relax while enjoying some home cooked food.

  We were sat at our favorite table, too; the one right next to the window facing the beach. Nothing beats being able to watch the waves crash as you eat a good meal. It was the perfect start to our day.

  We’d planned on going straight to the ship from breakfast, but Finn forgot his laptop. He said he’d have time to study during the sea days when we weren’t at port. I told him we’d probably be too busy, but decided not to argue. Once we got to the house Finn left the car running as he darted inside. He came out carrying a banana and his laptop case.

  “You’re already hungry again?” I asked incredulously as he hopped into the driver’s seat. He’d had a heaping mound of stuffed waffles for breakfast. How could he already want more food?

  “No. This is for you,” he said.

  “I’m not hungry.”

  Finn cocked his head, “You will be. Boarding can take hours, especially with the bigger ships.”

  I nodded and put the banana in my bag.

  The port recently built a new multi-level parking garage for the cruise lines, so parking was actually quite pleasant. I tried not to think about the $150 we’d be shelling out when we paid at the end of the week.

  “Don’t you get benefits or something?” I asked as we waited to board. Finn had gone on several cruises before we met, and I remembered him saying there were perks. Hopefully one of them was the preferred boarding Elliot talked about. I’d decided not to tell Finn about his brother’s advice, but the ones and fives I brought with me did come in handy when the porters offered to carry our luggage.

  Finn shrugged. “They sent me that pamphlet a few weeks ago that outlined what perks I get, but I never read it.”

  I sighed as he waved a nearby woman over to us. She wore a gold tag bearing the Imperial Cruise Line’s logo. The word Italy was neatly embossed directly below her name. “Excuse me, is there a line for members who’ve cruised before? I’m a Jade Member.”

  The woman perked up and her smile widened.

  “Of course, of course! Right this way, sir,” she said with a thick Italian accent. After thanking us for choosing Imperial Cruise Lines she waved us over to a much shorter line, right next to the boarding platform. I felt kind of guilty as I saw the mass of people waiting in the regular boarding lines. They weren’t moving very fast, and it only took five minutes before we were stepping onto the second deck of the ship.

  “Why don’t we board on deck one?” I asked.

  “Deck one is usually crew quarters, laundry, and all the places they don’t want guests to see,” Finn answered.

  We had to dodge several smiling crewmembers who wanted to take our pictures before we started toward our stateroom.

  “We should avoid the elevators,” Finn said. “Everyone will be trying to use them right now, the stairs will be easier.”

  We climbed several flights before reaching “The Gallery,” which is a collaboration of bars, restaurants, clothing stores, and souvenir shops that run the entire length of the Wellspring.

  My head was on a swivel as we continued up several elaborate staircases. Each had its own unique, breathtaking design. The marble railings and glass stairs seemed to glimmer and dance as we walked, and I found it impossible to take everything in at once. I was so dazed by my surroundings that I hardly noticed we stopped short of the deck our cabin was supposed to be on. One of a kind pieces of artwork were spaced along the brightly lit corridor Finn led me down. I was eyeing an oil painting of exotic flowers when he stopped in front of one of the cabin doors. I ran into him as a result, but he didn’t seem to notice. It wasn’t the cabin number I remembered from our reservations.

  He bumped my shoulder with excitement before I could ask why we’d stopped. “Here we are,” he said, his eyes gleaming.

  He slid his electronic cruise key into the reader, and as he pushed through the door the hallway was suddenly flooded with sunlight. “Surprise!” he said excitedly. I slowly walked through the door to find it was not the standard cabin I was expecting, but a suite instead. The first thing I noticed was the balcony on the opposite end of the cabin. Between an extravagant veranda and us was a large, flat screen television. It was perched above an elegant, overly long oak wood dresser; “Welcome Lily and Finn Datson,” was floating across its screen.

  I stood for a minute before dropping my carry on. I turned to Finn and gave him a hard look. “How can we afford this?” I asked, suddenly nervous of how much he must have spent on the room.

  Finn raised a hand in defense as he stepped inside and closed the door. “It didn’t cost us anything. I asked to be put on the upgrade list months ago. Jade members get priority if a better cabin becomes available for whatever reason, and the people who paid for this cabin cancelled last week.”

  “They just gave us a more expensive cabin for free?” I asked, still in disbelief.

  “One of the perks of being married to a Jade member,” Finn winked, sounding unusually smug.

  I still can’t believe he actually kept the room a secret from me for an entire week. Now I’m wondering if he has anything else in store for me.

  The food at the main dining hall was amazing. No, beyond amazing. It has probably ruined normal food for me. I had the Imperial seafood salad along with a lobster bisque that was to die for. For dessert I couldn’t decide between the key lime pie and the chocolate mousse, so I had both! Finn let me in on the secret that I could pick as many of each course as I wanted. Well, he didn’t really let me in on it. I found out when he ordered three appetizers and two main entrees. He’s such a pig.

  Finn managed to book us a table for two, which is apparently not an easy thing to do. During our dinner I noticed most tables were larger, and made for up to twelve people. I’m getting the impression that Finn’s trying to pull out all the stops for our honeymoon, and so far he’s succeeding. His attempts at romance usually end with corny jokes and attempts to make me laugh. Don’t get me wrong, I love his sense of humor, but this super romantic side of my husband is something I could get used to.

  “You’re going to get so fat if you keep eating like that,” I warned.

  “Hey now, I work out and have a high metabolism, so bring on the food.” He ignored my disapproving glare and continued to attack his prime rib.

  We went to the welcome aboard show after dinner. It was amazing. They had a Broadway quality musical performance, acrobats, and a really unique act where a guy made works of art by brushing sand over a projector. I kept thinking the acrobats were going to fall on top of us.

  The theater was breathtaking, and it kept reminding me of scenes from “The Phantom of the Opera.”

  I can’t wait to see the rest of the ship. Finn said it’ll probably take the whole week to explore everything.

  Tomorrow is an at sea day!

  August 11th

  I got sick today, even after taking several Dramamine. Finn said it might be because I‘m not used to eating every half hour. I’m thinking it could’ve been all the alcohol.

  We drink on occasion, but we’re not used to having so many choices constantly at our fingertips. I tried a Pina Colada and several Bahama Mamas today. Finn ordered a Hurricane, a couple of beers, and something called a Skull-Puncher.

  Only my husband would order something called a Skull-Puncher.

  Anyway, I hope the queasiness is from eating too much and not from sea sickness. I really don’t want to spend
the entire cruise in the lavatory (that’s what they call the bathrooms).

  After lunch we snagged some empty lounge chairs next to a pool on one of the tanning decks. Dr. Saddler did say I could get some sun as long as I avoided getting burnt. Finn got to enjoy rubbing me down with sun block before passing out next to me. He seems to have the relaxing thing down pat. I looked him over while he slept, wondering how he managed to stay in such good shape. Between school and work, the only time he had to work out was at night. His dirty blonde hair was matted in every direction from going in the pool earlier.

  We explored the ship a little more after getting some sun. The Wellspring really is like a city on the water. It’s incredible how they can fit so many things on board without making you feel claustrophobic. Everything has its own cozy, well thought out place.