Redemption (Desire Never Dies)

by Clara Grace Walker

Today she thought for the first time she had designed her compound incorrectly. When she had planned CRC’s layout, keeping the hotel separate from the rehab facility had seemed obvious. It allowed tight control over family members’ access to patients and prevented them from unmonitored contact. Now, however, the flaw in her plan became clear. Having Earl housed at the hotel kept him separated from her and made it difficult to know what he was doing. She could go over there, of course, but then she might look star-struck. Patty was too busy with her seminars and front desk duties to spend much time keeping tabs on him, and having him shadowed by Dex or Jerry would only make Earl suspicious. She couldn’t have that. She needed him relaxed, trusting and malleable to her suggestions. It would have been better if Ryan hadn’t had that mishap with Pauline. She could have sent Pauline over there to help tend to his needs. But there was nothing to be done about that now.

  Sitting on her bed, she stewed about the whole Earl situation, and his reunion with Mindy, until she wanted to scream. Mindy was much too happy about seeing Earl. He’d broken up with her two years ago. Wasn’t she supposed to be in love with Vince Allan now? And Earl confirmed her suspicions he was still carrying a torch for Mindy. That hug he’d given her displayed more than wanting to support a friend. Just the way he looked at her betrayed how hung up on the little tramp he still was. Envy seethed inside her, not dulled one bit by reminding herself that Earl had dumped Mindy. What if he was hoping CRC would fix whatever was wrong with Mindy so they could patch things up?

  She’d assumed fate meant to drop Earl in her lap, exactly as requested. Maybe it wasn’t that simple though. Maybe, like anything worth having, fate had simply handed her the opportunity, and it was up to her to make the most of it. Picking up the phone, she dialed Anthony Howard’s number.

  “Shirley,” he answered. “What can I do for you?”

  “I have a job for you.”

  “Another one? Didn’t I just send you a new patient?”

  “Yes,” she said calmly. He’d been out of the program too long. Her teachings were wearing thin. No matter. She’d fix that at his refresher course. “I need you to get Vince Allan signed in here also. Right away. Tomorrow if possible.”

  “Vince Allan?” He sounded less-than-thrilled. “How am I supposed to do that? Why am I supposed to do that?”

  “What do you mean, why?”

  “Mindy’s there right now,” he pointed out needlessly. “She and Vince bring out the worst in each other. You can’t have them both there at the same time. Neither one of them will get clean.”

  “Have faith in me, Anthony. I’ll make sure they both get clean. Especially when they have each other to rely on for support.”

  “You’re living in dream land, Shirley. That’s not going to happen.”

  “Why not? They’re a couple, aren’t they? Don’t you believe true love conquers all?”

  “No, they’re not a couple.” His voice had risen again. “No, they’re not in love. And no, I don’t believe true love conquers all. Honestly, Shirley. You’re the one who told me to think with my head and not my emotions.”

  “What do you mean they’re not a couple?” She couldn’t possibly have heard him right.

  “I mean Vince is done with her ass. At least that’s what he told me in Aspen.”

  It couldn’t possibly be true. She felt her dream slipping away. Fate wouldn’t be so cruel. “You need to get Vince here,” she said again. “And tell him he needs to fix his relationship with Mindy.”

  “Right.” He paused. “I don’t know how you expect me to get him there anyway. He’s not even on my record label.”

  “Whose record label is he on?”

  “No one’s. The guy’s a fucking junkie. Did you see him on E! News the other night? Talking about how he’s working on another album? What a joke. No one in this town will touch that guy.”

  “There you have it then.” She couldn’t help but smile. Fate really was on her side. “Offer Vince a record deal on the condition he promptly checks into CRC and gets cleaned up.”

  “You can’t tell me how to run my business.” Anthony’s voice went up at least an octave. “I don’t want that washed-up, has-been loser on my label.”

  She took a breath. “You’re right, Anthony. I can’t tell you how to run your business. You go ahead and sign, or don’t sign, whomever you like, and I’ll tell the authorities what I know about how you covered your gambling losses.”

  He huffed out a breath and muttered something indecipherable. “Fine. I’ll get Vince over there.”

  “Good. Let me know when to expect him.”

  Hanging up, Shirley felt much better. She couldn’t wait to see the look on Earl’s face when Mindy’s boyfriend showed up and he was left standing on the sidelines. He’d be in need of comfort and guidance then, and she’d be happy to give it to him.

  Chapter 15

  Vince Allan strolled into the offices of Paranoia Records enjoying the buzz from a joint and a couple of Lowenbraus. As soon as Anthony called asking for a meeting, he’d started celebrating. The interview with E! News had been genius. His career was finally headed for a comeback.

  As he stepped inside the art deco reception area, the swagger returned to his step. Wood floors and chrome trim shone in the California sun, streaming through the windows from a clear, hot sky. The chrome especially sparkled, making it look like slivers of light danced off its surface before ping-ponging around the room and glistening off the blue and gold tiles. It reminded Vince of a kaleidoscope, making his buzz all the trippier. On top of the walls, polished obsidian had been fashioned into a city skyline motif that encircled the room and ended at a chrome reception desk. A girl with bright pink hair stood behind the desk staring at a computer monitor, typing something on a keyboard and speaking in hushed tones through a blue tooth device wound around her ear. Vince noticed her hair first, and then the tattoo, the head of a phoenix, visible just above her scoop-neck tank top.

  “Hey!” He stopped in front of the desk, smiling at the girl, and pointed at her chest. “I’d love for you to show me the rest of your tattoo sometime.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Like I haven’t heard that line before.” She motioned toward the door behind her. “Go on in. Mr. Howard’s expecting you.”

  Vince didn’t like the way the girl blew him off. She’d be wishing she’d been a little nicer when he hit the big-time again. He shot her a dirty look before opening the door and stepping inside.

  “Anthony!” He held his hand up, expecting the guy to return his high-five, but the jackass sat at a chair behind his desk and made no effort to stand.

  “Vince.” He greeted him with barely a grunt. “Have a seat. I’ll be with you in a minute.”

  Vince looked around the office. A blue suede sofa and two matching chairs flanked a glass coffee table on the far side of the room, but he supposed Anthony meant for him to sit in one of the two black and white suede chairs on the other side of his glass-topped desk. He took a seat and waited patiently while Anthony watched a porn clip showing two blondes and some biker dude on the computer monitor. His excitement drained away to nothing. Anthony had called him asking for a meeting. Not the other way around. He’d expected the guy to be happy to see him, not act like he was invisible. Finally, after a minute or so of listening to grunts and groans, he stood back up. He’d rushed over without having lunch, and now he was having a serious case of the munchies. “If you’re busy, dude, I can come back later. It’s totally no problem.”

  “Sit back down.” Anthony swiveled the computer monitor away from his view so it faced the outside windows of his office, and motioned Vince back to the chair. “I have a business deal to offer you.”

  Vince returned to the chair, resting on the edge. “Yeah. That’s what you said on the phone. You said something about a record deal. Hey, is that pink-haired girl gonna offer me something to drink? Or some sandwiches or something? I’ve totally got the munchies.”

  “I’m prepared to put out your
next album,” Anthony said, ignoring Vince’s request for food. He craned his head back toward the monitor and then back to Vince. “I have a couple of conditions that come with it though.”

  Conditions. Life was full of people who liked that fucking word. “Whatever, dude. I just want to get my career back on track.”

  “Good. Because if you don’t agree to them, you can forget doing business with me. Are we clear on that?”

  “Whatever, man.” Ten years ago, no one would have dared speak to him that way. “What d’ya want?”

  Anthony stared him down, waiting a long moment before speaking. “When you leave here, you’re going to get your butt down to Key Largo and check into the Coral Reef Center. I want you there tomorrow.”

  “What?” Anthony wasn’t making any fucking sense. “I thought you wanted to give me a record deal.”

  “I’m not giving you anything unless you get yourself cleaned up first. And don’t worry about packing either. They’ll have everything you need there. They won’t let you take your own stuff anyway.”

  Vince thought a moment. “Shit. That’s where Mindy’s at, isn’t it? I don’t want to run into her ass, dude. She’s fucking toxic.”

  Anthony grinned, like he was enjoying a good joke. “Yeah, well, that brings me to condition number two. You have to pretend like you’re trying to hook back up with her.”

  “What?!” Vince jumped from the chair. His mouth was so dry his tongue stuck to its roof. “No way, dude. I’m not fucking hooking back up with her ass. I just told you. She’s fucking bad for my reputation. I’ll go get a record deal somewhere else. And where’s that pink-haired girl with some water or something? I’m getting a serious case of cottonmouth.”

  “You’ll get a record deal somewhere else?” Anthony laughed. “Sure you will. Now sit your butt back down and listen. I said pretend to try and hook back up with her. In public. Just don’t really do it. Hell, I don’t want you hooked up with her either. You two are a mess together. You’re only pretending to be interested in Mindy to keep her and Earl apart. At least that’s how I’m reading things. And for the record, the pink-haired girl’s name is Tiffany.” He pressed a button on his phone. “Tiffany, honey, could you please bring Vince a bottle of water. Apparently he smoked too much weed on the way over.”

  “Thanks, man.” Vince pulled his tongue off the roof of his mouth. “I’m not going to be able to talk if I don’t get something to drink soon. Hey, do you think she can bring me some food? I’m totally starving.”

  Anthony scowled. “I’ll have her get you something on your way out.”

  “Huh?” Vince scratched his head just as Tiffany came in with a bottle of Perrier. “Oh, thanks, man.” He unscrewed the cap and swallowed half the bottle in three large gulps. “Oh, God. That’s so much better.” He looked back to where Tiffany had been standing, but she was already disappearing through the door. He turned back to Anthony. “Man, I don’t think she likes me. And what the fuck am I gonna do about Mindy? What if she thinks we’re getting back together for real, man? She looks like shit with her hair dyed blonde.”

  “Christ, Vince. You’re a screw-up.” Anthony tapped his hand on his desk. “With Earl there my guess is you’re not going to get anywhere with her anyway. Not as long as she thinks Earl might take her back.”

  Vince scratched his head. “I’m confused, man. What d’ya want to keep Earl and Mindy apart for?”

  “It’s best you don’t ask. Find a way to get Mindy alone and make sure she knows you don’t want to get back with her. But don’t let anyone else hear you tell her that. You got me?”

  “Yeah. Whatever, dude.” Vince finished off the Perrier. He didn’t get it. And people thought he was a head case. “I’ll be at that Coral Reef place tomorrow. Now where’s my contract?”

  Anthony turned the computer monitor back around to face him. “I’ve already faxed it to your agent. I’ll have it signed as soon as the Coral Reef Center tells me you’ve checked in.”

  Chapter 16

  The day had started with such promise; Rory offering her favors and taking her to see Earl. Mindy wished now she’d simply asked for a cheeseburger. As long as she hadn’t told Earl about the face in her room and the dead body, part of her could still hope he would believe her about other things. But he hadn’t believed her. He’d sounded just like Mama.

  You need to take responsibility for what you’ve done.

  She heard them both saying it. Repeating those same ugly words over and over again. She wanted to make him stop. And God, she wanted a drink. Anything. Beer, wine, vodka, whiskey. It didn’t matter. Just something to silence the accusing voices. She was a slut. She wore those short skirts. She had Frank killed. She gave away her baby. She had to take responsibility.

  Mindy dropped her hands to her sides, feeling them tremble against her legs. She took back her thoughts about wanting a drink. She didn’t want to make Mama’s mistakes anymore. The booze and the bad judgment. She wanted to sing again, and get out of this evil place and prove that the face in her room and the body in the woods were real. But damn, she was angry at Earl. Why did he have to treat her like a liar? Just the way Mama had.

  As she stepped inside the rec room for family visiting hour, ambivalence weighed her down. How was it possible to love Earl and long to be with him, and still wish he would leave? How could he not believe her? Was there something so wrong with her people automatically assumed she was a liar?

  Her decision about whether to continue or run back to her room was cut short when Earl spotted her and headed her way. He’d been standing at the pool table, talking to Scott’s dad and Darla’s boyfriend, when he saw her and smiled. It was a tentative smile, she thought. One he didn’t seem sure she would return. He was right to think that. Indecision rooted her to the floor and she stood staring at her hands, watching them curl into fists.

  “Mindy.” He reached her side, wrapping one arm around her and kissing her on the cheek.

  “Hey,” she said. “I see you’re making friends.”

  He nodded. “Preston and Rod are pretty cool. Not to mention the only other men at the hotel. Unless you count Dex and Jerry. And they’re not real talkative.”

  She nodded toward the pool table. “Were you in the middle of a game?”

  “No. Let’s sit down.” He led her to the loveseat in the corner where they’d sat the night before. “I want to talk about what you said earlier.”

  “I don’t.” She frowned, glancing toward Ryan, the head security guard, now walking their way. “There are too many people here. And cameras.”

  Earl followed her gaze toward the door exiting the building. “Fine. We’ll talk about it later. Tell me how you’re doing.”

  “What do you want me to say? Fine?”

  He hesitated for a moment, placing his hand over top of hers. “No. I’d like to hear how you’re really doing. Why can’t you tell me what’s really going on?”

  More pointless questions. Explaining he wouldn’t believe her didn’t seem any more productive than simply giving him the answers he kept pushing for. She leaned back into the loveseat, careful not to touch him. “You’ve got your Doctor Who shirt on.” They used to watch it together all the time.

  “Yes.” He smiled. “You still watch?”

  She shook her head. “Not since I moved out.”

  “You don’t like it anymore?”

  It reminded her too much of him. “I haven’t had time.”

  Earl leaned back into the cushions beside her. “So we’re just going to make small talk for the next hour then?”

  “I suppose so.”

  He heaved out a long breath. “When are you going to start trusting me?”

  “When are you going to stop asking me to?”

  “Fuck.” He sat there for a moment, allowing the awkwardness to linger between them and stroked the side of her face. “I’m only trying to help, you know.”

  “I know.” Why did she have to love him? Why couldn’t she just tell
him to leave? “I don’t know if anyone can help me.”

  There. She’d told him the truth. It was the best explanation she could give.

  She expected him to leave then. To admit defeat and wish her well with the rest of her life. That would be how Earl would do things. But he didn’t. He continued to sit there in silence, stroking her hair and the side of her face. And for the life of her, she didn’t know why.

  Chapter 17

  Checking into the Coral Reef Center was a study in efficiency. Sign here. Sign there. Initial this. Initial that. Here’s your packet of information. Rory will show you to your room and help you get settled. Lunch is at eleven thirty and Dr. Belanger will see you immediately following for a physical. We look forward to helping you mend your lifestyle. Next.

  Next turned out to be Vince Allan, who walked through the door just as Nick was signing his last piece of paper. “Vince,” Nick greeted him at the reception desk with his customary handshake. “Talk about your small world. You finally decide to climb off the party train?”

  Vince barely bumped a shoulder. “Whatever, man. Anthony Howard says he’ll give me a record deal if I get my act cleaned up. And my career is what matters, you know? I’ve been writing music for this new album. Wait ‘til you hear it. Your paper’s gonna be full of headlines about my comeback. People aren’t going to making Vince Allan jokes anymore.”

  Anthony Howard? The same man who had guardianship over Mindy? Nick wondered what the guy was up to. Given what he knew about Anthony, his interest in Vince probably had more to do with milking publicity over his whispered split with Mindy than helping him achieve a comeback.

  With Darla here also, there were sure to be fireworks. The last time Mindy, Vince and Darla had been in a room together, Darla had been ready to scratch Mindy’s eyes out. And while Darla had been with Rod for the last four years, that didn’t mean she’d forgiven Mindy for snatching Vince away in the first place. Darla was always a bit volatile. This little stint in rehab could prove interesting in more ways than one.