Street Dreams

by K'wan

  Then he noticed the digital readout on his answering machine signaled four messages. Rio didn’t feel like talking to none of his peeps, but he checked his messages in hopes that Trinity had called. The first message was from Shamel: YO GOD... WHAT’S REALLY GOOD WITH YOU? I THOUGHT WE WAS GONNA HOOK UP, SON. HOLLA AT ME WHEN YOU GET THIS.Rio mashed the ERASE button. Shamel was probably somewhere laid up with a girl at that hour of the morning.

  The next message was from Cutty: WHAT UP, MY NIGGA? I JUST CALLED TO CHECK WITH YOU. NIGGAZ SAID YOU WASN’T FEELING SO HOT. HIT ME ON DA JUMP OFF. ONE. Damn, word in the hood traved fast. Rio wondered how many other niggaz would call to give their grief-ridden speeches? Of them all, Cutty and Shamel are the two he felt the most love for.

  The next was a hang-up. As the fourth message began to play, Rio was going to just cut the machine off. The familiar voice that came from the speaker froze his hand. RIO ...AH, THIS IS ...IT’SME...

  TRINITY. ICAN’T TALK LONG CAUSE THE SECURITY GUARD IS LETTING ME USE HIS CELL. LISTEN ... I JUST WANTED TO SEE HOW YOU WERE DOING. THEY SAY I CAN COME HOME TOMORROW MORNING. YOU CAN COME GET ME ...WELL, IF YOU WANT? IF YOU DON’T WANT TO ... I

  UNDERSTAND. BYE.

  Rio played the message two more times before he blinked. The sound of Trinity's voice seemed to pull some of the tension out of him. She wasn’t there with him in body, but she rode with him in spirit. He wondered how she would take the news? He felt like such a hypocrite. He was always pushing Trinity to do well and make something of her life, but look at the rotten mess he had made of his. Most cats would look at being a Capo in Prince's crew as a badge of honor, but to Rio it was a badge of shame.

  No point crying about it now though. Rio had shot dice with the devil and crapped out. He had to ride it out now no matter what the outcome. One thing was for damn sure, Rio might not have wanted to play the game, but he’d be damned if he was gonna lose. He would milk Prince's little circle for all it was worth and do the right thing with his money. He had taken Trinity's father from her, so the least he could do was make sure that she was taken care of. She would have the cleanest living from the filthiest money.

  Truck fidgeted on the bar stool as Li’l J applied stitches to his damaged hand. Skin hung loosely from his knuckle, but the bleeding seemed to slow from a spill to a trickle. Li’l J looked at Prince's eldest boy and shook his head. Truck's hand was busted up pretty good, but he had managed to avoid serious injury. If he had lost any of its mobility, it would’ve served him right because he had done it to himself.

  After J dropped Rio off, he had escorted Prince back to his plush apartment to meet with Truck. Prince broke the news to Truck about the young soldier's promotion. Needless to say, Truck hadn’t taken it well. He had thrown a fit, cursing and smashing things in his daddy's office. It was slamming his fist through the glass bar that caused the injury to his hand.

  Prince had made it clear that no matter how much of a fit Truck threw, Rio would be Capo of Douglass projects. This was his will and Prince's will was law. It wasn’t as if he had left Truck out of the loop. Prince had given his eldest sole control of his crack houses from 105th and Amsterdam to 112th and Morningside. Truck still wasn’t content with this. Douglass was one of Prince's most profitable spots and Truck felt as if it was only right that he have it. The nine-block kingdom that Truck was given produced enough paper to keep everyone happy, but in Truck's warped mind it didn’t compare to controlling a city housing project. Truck felt that it was a slight to his honor. A slight that wouldn’t soon be forgotten.

  9

  Rio arrived at the hospital bright and early the next morning. When he walked into the room, Trinity and Alexis were sitting on the bed chitchatting. “Sup, y’all?” Rio mumbled. “What up, Rio?” Alex said. Rio walked over and kissed Trinity on the forehead. She held his face in her hands and he pulled away slightly. Knowing what he had done to her father, Rio couldn’t look her in the eye. She noticed his strange behavior, but didn’t comment on it.

  “Thanks for coming,” Trinity said, trying to muster a smile.

  “Ain’t nothing,” he said, hugging her. “You my girl and I’d do anything for you, ma. You heard? Anything.”

  Something about the way Rio said that bothered Trinity. She had known Rio long enough to know when he wasn’t himself. There was something very peculiar about the way he was acting. When he touched her there wasn’t any warmth behind it. And as much as they loved to gaze into each other's eyes, he would barely meet hers. There was a small part of Trinity that wondered if Billy's phone call had anything to do with Rio's strange behavior.

  Billy had phoned Trinity earlier that morning with disturbing news. Their father had pulled another all-nighter. From time to time Baker was known to disappear overnight on one of his drinking binges, but they would always be able to find him somewhere in the hood. This time was different. Billy had been to all of Baker's haunts, but could find no sign of him.

  Billy, having an overactive imagination, feared the worst. He ran down the line from kidnapping to abandonment. All in a quest to justify their father's disappearance. One theory had offended Trinity personally.

  Billy wondered if maybe Rio had something to do with their father's untimely vanishing. At the time, Trinity had dismissed the idea and made Billy promise never to speak of it again. But with the way Rio was acting, maybe Billy wasn’t so far off? The situation would definitely bear some looking into.

  “You bout ready?” Rio asked, breaking into her thoughts.

  “Ah … yeah. Just let me get my paperwork.” Trinity busied herself gathering up the release papers and tried to push thoughts of foul play from her head. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t stop thinking the worst. What if Rio and Baker did get into it and Baker got killed? There were ups and downs to this. She could finally stop playing the twisted game her father had subjected her to for so many years. And she could finally commit herself totally to Rio. But then…if Rio had kill her father he would surely get the chair if it ever got out. And what about Billy? Would he end up a product of the system?

  Trinity knew she had to step to Rio about this, but how to approach him? There was no doubt in her mind or heart that she was gonna ride with her boo. Whether he did it or not she knew he could justify it. Her man's word was good enough for her. Trinity's only problems now was, keeping her man out of jail and her little brother out of the system.

  Cutty peeped from the lobby window of his bulding, scanning the block for possible trouble. After seeing that all was well, he stepped from the shadows and into the noon sun with a light bop. He had nabbed a quick $3,700 from a sting he had pulled that morning. He was going shopping on the niggaz he had robbed on Ninety-fourth Street.

  As Cutty came through the parking lot of the projects, he spotted his niggaz Boo and Kev. Those two jokers were the Mutt and Jeff of the stick-up game. They were determined to become notorious, but just couldn’t seem to get it right. They got a big E for effort though. These cats would bust you frame if they thought you had some change. Cutty respected their gangsta and they respected his.

  “Fuck you two criminals doing in the good part of town?” Cutty asked playfully.

  “Oh shit,” Kev laughed. “My nigga Cutty. What it be like?”

  The three thugs exchanged hugs and insults. It was good like that between them. If the two had a leader, it would’ve been Kev. He was a tall handsome kid with copper-colored skin. Kev was one of those kids who didn’t have to do dirt. He was educated and had a nice little place on the lower end of town. He did dirt cause he liked to. Kev was fucked up like that.

  Boo was a bit different. He was a wide-bearded dude, who wore his hair in a large nappy fro and had limbs like tree trunks. Boo constantly scanned the area with his good eye in search of enemies or a possible vic. Boo was a mad dog that could never get full. He was one of those dudes that was on some “Fuck you, ya momma, and yo kids. Gimmie mine, nicca!” The only thing he respected was paper. Wasn’t nobody
in the hood crazy enough to hang with Boo other than Kev. He had a way with the big man.

  “What up, Cutty?” Boo said in his raspy voice. When he spoke, it sounded like someone firing up the engine on an old junker. This came from the scar he sported across his throat. Boo had the scar, but the kid that gave it to him was wearing wings.

  “Chilling,” Cutty responded. “Just came out.”

  “Us, too,” Boo said, looking around. “Say Cutty, you fuck's wit these niggaz over here. Who's winning?”

  Cutty looked at Boo and shook his head. The youngster was always looking to come up. “I can’t call it, Boo. I do me and they do them. As long as you ain’t fucking wit none of my people, do you.”

  “Drop a nigga a hint or something. I know you know who's clicking?”

  “Come on, Boo. You know I don’t rock like that, son. Finger-pointing ain’t my thang.”

  Boo started to press the issue but Kev cut him off. “Come on wit that, yo,” he warned his friend. “No disrespect, Cutty. My man ain’t mean nothing by that.”

  “Don’t sweat it,” Cutty said. “I ain’t offended. So other than trying to bang a ma fucka, what y’all up to?”

  “Shit,” Kev said. “We just out here trying to come up, you know?”

  “Fo sho.”

  “Nigga, you need to get back in and give some of us undereducated ma fuckas some direction.”

  “Nah, Kev. They giving out too much time for that shit, kid.”

  “Fuck, Cutty …nigga, I know a bid ain’t made you chicken-hearted?”

  “Li’l nigga, don’t even come at me like that. My gun hotter than ya momma house on a summer day. I’m the kinda dude that’ll do whatever I gotta do to get some. I’ve just found that there's mo money in one game than the other. I’m good with my choices in life, kid.”

  “I know that's right,” Kev said, giving Cutty dap. “You always was a hustling nigga.”

  “And I’m always gonna be, Kev. Take the advice of a nigga who knows. Always have a hustle to fall back on. A true get-money nigga will always know of other ways to clock cheese. If one well goes dry, drink from another one. Simple as that.”

  “Water and cheese,” Boo mumbled. “We out here thinking about money and this nigga planning a picnic?”

  Kev and Boo looked at Cutty dumbfounded. Most of what he had said went over Boo's head, but Kev was the smarter of the two. Kev listened to what Cutty had dropped on him and cracked a half-smile. Kev understood what the older head was talking about. Cutty was a gangsta, there was no doubt about that. But more than anything he was a thinker. His only problems were, he was always thinking on how to gain profit from negative shit. Rio had often tried to sway him, but some people were just set in their ways.

  Kev tapped Boo and started walking up the block. It was always good talking to Cutty. The boy had a lot of wisdom to be so young. Sometimes he and Kev would bump into each other on the streets and talk for hours. Nothing in particular, just swapping knowledge. It was all good, but it still didn’t change the fact that Kev's pockets were leaning. After checking his weapon he and his partner went off to catch a vic.

  Trinity put her key in the front door and prepared herself for the worst. Surprisingly enough, the house was empty. She walked inside and held the door for Rio. He paused for a long moment before he crossed the threshold. The funnier Rio acted, the more afraid Trinity became.

  “Looks like no one's home,” Trinity said, trying to strike up a conversation.

  “Guess not,” Rio said, looking around. Being in the house of a man he had killed was creeping him out in a major way. Rio kept feeling like Baker was going to spring out of a closet and grab him. Between the bodies and the pressure of his new career move he felt like he was going to wig out any minute. He needed to clear the air and see just where he stood with Trinity. Before Rio could open his mouth, Trinity began speaking.

  “Rio,” she began slowly. “We need to talk.”

  “I was just going to say the same thing, T.”

  “Oh, okay. Well… look, I guess you deserve some sort of explanation.”

  “Trinity, it's cool. If you don’t wanna talk about it, I’m fine with that.”

  “No, Rio. I think I need to talk about it. The thing with me and my father … well, I don’t know exactly how it started, but it's been going on for a while. When it first happened I thought it would be just a onetime thing, but it wasn’t. He…it went on for years. The older I got the more often he tried.” Trinity paused, trying to gather herself. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I was just so ashamed.”

  “Trinity,” he said, putting his arms around her. “You ain’t do nothing wrong. Your daddy was just sick, that's all.”

  “I know, Rio. I just always hoped it would get better.” Rio held her close to him for a long while. Trinity lay with her head on his chest as he rocked her. She felt so safe in Rio's arms. It was a feeling she wanted to go on forever. Then it hit her that Rio had spoken about her father in the past tense. Before Trinity ask him about it Rio broke the silence.

  “Trinity,” he whispered. “I got something I need to tell you. I’m trying to get my thoughts together, but it's hard.” “Take your time,” she said, patting his hand.

  Rio looked around the living room, trying not to make eye contact with her. After taking a breath, he continued. “Remember how you used to sometimes ask me if I would reconsider Prince's offer?”

  “Yeah, and I’m sorry, Rio. I had no right to suggest that to you. I know how you feel about that kinda stuff and I should’ve never even brought it back up. Rio — “

  “Hold on, T,” he said, cutting her off. “Just listen for a minute. I know I’m the one always taking about doing the right thing and doing something more with my life. See…the thing is, sometimes life deals you a bum hand and you gotta play it out. Even if it means going against what you believe in.”

  “Rio, what are you saying to me?” she asked nervously.

  “I took it, T.”

  “Took what, Rio? What are you talking about?” “I’m in. Prince made me a Capo,” he said, sounding defeated. “A Capo,” she asked in disbelief. “What do you mean, a Capo? Rio, tell me you didn’t?”

  “I’m with Prince, now.”

  Trinity was overcome with both fear and anger. She couldn’t believe that he would go and do something so drastic without consulting her. Trinity had been a little selfish when she first suggested he take Prince up on his offer. It's not that she wanted to see him in harm's way, but the way she was living threatened to drive her crazy. If Rio was on Prince's payroll, they’d be able to move a whole lot sooner. After seeing how adamant he was about not doing it, Trinity deaded the subject and tried to figure something else out. Now Rio was telling her that he had had a change of heart? Something was definitely not right. There was no way Rio would’ve made this kind of move. Unless he had no choice.

  “Rio,” she said, grabbing his arm. “Are you fucking crazy? Tell me you’re playing.”

  “Nah, T. A nigga got into a situation and ya man helped out. I owe him.”

  “Owe him?” she barked in a heated tone. “Rio, you don’t owe that nigga shit. You ya own man, Rio, and that's why I fuck with you. You standing here saying that you just became a part of one of New York's largest drug cliques, cause you owe a nigga? I don’t buy that, Rio. Come with the real.”

  “A’ight,” he said, steering her toward the sofa, “sit down, boo.” When Trinity was seated, he said, “I don’t know how you’re gonna take this.”

  “Rio, I’m down for you from now till the day I shut my eyes. Just keep it real.”

  “A’ight. After you told me about… well, you know? Anyhow, I didn’t take it so good. Trinity, I love you as much as a dude can love his own mother. My feelings for you is deep like that. For your father, or any other nigga to do something like that … I couldn’t accept it, Trinity. It ate at me until I couldn’t control it. I felt what he did to you was the most heinous of crimes. A crime punishable by de
ath.”

  Trinity sat there stone-faced. She knew what he was saying, but her brain couldn’t translate it to her. Until that moment she had only entertained the thought in her mind. Now, as her lover spilled the truth at her feet, she knew.

  She just sat there looking at Rio's tear-streaked face and said nothing. She felt a strange mixture of utter shock and joy. The weight she had carried for so long was now lifted. Her father was gone, but there wouldn’t be much of a difference in her day to day life. Trinity always kept a job and pulled her own weight. She hadn’t asked her father for money since she was sixteen. She didn’t need him financially and she damn sure didn’t need him morally. What's done is done. Baker was gone and hating Rio wouldn’t bring him back. In a strange way, she felt like thanking him.

  “Trinity,” he said, touching her cheek. “You understand what I’m trying to tell you?”

  After a long pause, Trinity found her voice. “Yes, Rio. I heard you.”

  “Listen, T. I’m sorry, God knows I am. But I wasn’t in my right frame of mind. Trinity, I swear to you—”

  “Rio,” she said, cutting him off. “I… I kinda knew. The other night I had this weird dream. I can’t remember what it was about, but I woke up thinking about my father. Rio, I know you didn’t kill my father cause you’re some kinda monster. You did what you did because he hurt me. I know I should be cursing you or trying to turn you in, but I’m not. I understand, baby. I understand.”

  Rio exhaled and wiped his face with the back of his hand. He hadn’t known what to expect when he had dropped the bomb on her. But Trinity was gangsta with hers. He didn’t think it was possible, but at that moment he found himself loving her a little harder.

  “It's gonna be okay,” she said, rubbing the back of his head. “But what should I do if the police come around?”

  “Just be cool,” he told her. “Prince's people took care of everything. When you wake up tomorrow, call down and report the old man missing. Even if his body turns up, which I doubt, you got an airtight alibi. You was laid up in the hospital when he caught it. Everything is gonna be fine.”