Unspoken Love

by Lynn Gale - Unspoken Love

  “Are you okay?” he asked tenderly.

  “Why the concern now, Nicholas?” she retorted. “You’ve made it quite clear how you feel about the baby and me.”

  “I am sorry. I was shocked at the news.”

  Jenny snubbed his apology. “This wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t coerced me into marriage, then come to my room in the middle of the night to claim your husbandly rights.” Tears sprang into her eyes as she continued to lash out at him. “You’ve taken me from my father whom I love above all else. And now, you’ve ruined the joys of motherhood!”

  Nicholas helped Jenny to a sitting position and sought to comfort her. He wiped away her tears, his emotions playing heavy on his mind. He searched for the right words when there was a loud knock at the door. “I’ll see who it is,” he said, reluctant to leave her side.

  He went downstairs and met Billy at the door.

  “Warren says for you to come quick! One of the mares is having her foal, and he thinks it’s going to be a breech birth!”

  Nicholas knew the serious complications that threatened the mare. “Tell Warren I’ll be right out, Billy.”

  “Yes, Sir!” Eagerly, Billy rushed away to deliver the message.

  Nicholas returned to Jenny’s chambers. “I have to go to the barn. One of the mares is about to give birth. I need to relieve Warren so he can get back to the fields. We’ll talk later.” With reluctance, he vanished from her presence.

  Jenny sat on the bed, feeling cold and drained as her thoughts ran rampant. She knew Nicholas didn’t want her or the baby and vowed not to be a burden to him. No longer able to stand their mockery of a marriage, she decided to leave this very day and seek her father’s comfort.

  She slipped into her riding habit and put on sturdy shoes, then walked to the barn and silently motioned for Billy to come outside.

  “Nicholas is real busy with the mare right now!” Billy said excitedly. “I’m about to witness my first birthing.”

  “I don’t wish to disturb him Billy, but I would like you to saddle Daisy so I can go riding. Please bring her up to the house. I’ll wait for you there.”

  “Yes, Ma’am,” Billy answered and set off to do her bidding.

  As Nicholas labored with the mare, Billy went to the other side of the stables and prepared Daisy for riding.

  Meanwhile Jenny rushed to her room and gathered some of her belongings. As she rifled through the wardrobe, she caught sight of her mother’s wedding gown. Cramped for space, she couldn’t take it along and planned to send for it later. Taking pen and paper, she scribbled a brief note to Nicholas.

  Nicholas,

  You are free from me. I am going home to Father.

  Jenny

  Jenny didn’t want Billy to know of her intentions. After he brought Daisy to the house, she waited for him to return to the barn, then tied her valise to the saddle and carefully mounted. She skirted the barn, certain Nicholas would prevent her from leaving if he saw her riding out. Avoiding Warren and the field hands, she rode along a seldom-used path, hiding among the pine trees as she left the plantation. When she was on the main road, she picked up speed and, exercising caution, rode the long trail home.

  By mid-afternoon, she was but a mile from her destination. The long winding slope was a welcome sight as she climbed upward, nearing her father’s farm. She rode onto the homestead, choosing the right words to explain her dilemma only to discard them. She just couldn’t hurt her father and didn’t want to upset him. She heard hoofbeats and glanced behind her. Nicholas thundered toward her, fury written on his face.

  “What prompted you to leave?” he asked, reining Dexter to a halt. Jumping from his mount, he lifted Jenny from the mare and walked her behind a large hickory tree.

  Jenny sent him a disdainful look. “I thought I made myself clear in the note. I am coming home to father where I belong. I should never have let you talk me into this marriage. I want out now!”

  “It’s not that simple, Jenny. I’ve got too much to sacrifice and will not lose my land. You’ll stay with me and be my wife as we planned. Besides, you’re pregnant now. You can’t just up and leave!”

  “I already did,” she snapped. “I don’t need you! I can live here with Father and bring my child up without your help.”

  “I won’t let you!” Nicholas replied. They stood in silence, glaring at each other, each refusing to bend. Finally, Nicholas said, “Now that we’re here we’ll have to make a good showing.” He glanced around the tree and up at the house. “Your father is at the window waiting for us to come up. Remember his health, Jenny, and do as I tell you. If you love him enough to protect him, you’ll come back with me and see this marriage through. Do I make myself clear?”

  “Perfectly.” She clenched her teeth. “You may have the last word now, but rest assured, you will pay dearly for this someday!”

  He placed his hand on her arm and guided her toward the house. “I’m paying dearly now.”

  William came from the stables with a broad grin on his homely face. “Hello, Mrs. Grant. Your pa’s going to be glad to see you. He glanced at Nicholas with respect. “Good day to you, Sir.”

  Racked with turmoil, Jenny forced herself to return the amenities to William. “William, will you tend the horses for me?”

  “Anything for you, Mrs. Grant,” he answered kindly. Gathering the reins, he led Daisy and Dexter into the barn.

  Once William was inside, the smile came away from her face. She glared at Nicholas, angry that he had followed her home.

  Nicholas cupped her chin in his hand and returned her gaze.

  “Replace your scowl with a grin lest Thomas and Molly suspect us of quarreling,” he advised.

  Molly came out to greet them, temporarily halting their discord. She hugged them both.

  “How pleased we are to see you! Thomas is delighted you’ve come to visit.” A look of concern came into her soft brown eyes as she lowered her voice. “Dr. Jones thinks he has had a mild setback, and we mustn’t unduly upset him. He tires so easily.”

  As Jenny listened to Molly’s chatter, she realized she couldn’t possibly burden her father with her problems. She stepped into the cozy, familiar house and ran into his outstretched arms. “I’m so glad to see you, Father!”

  “It’s wonderful seeing you, Jenny.” Catching her unaware, he asked, “How’s married life treating you?”

  A flustered expression came over Jenny. “I—I . . . We—we . . .” she stammered.

  “Everything is fine, Thomas,” Nicholas interceded. “We came over as soon as we could. Jenny is going to have a baby, and we wanted you to be the first to know.” He gazed at Jenny. “Isn’t that right, dear?”

  Jenny sent Nicholas a reproachful glare, knowing she would have to corroborate his story since her father and Molly were clearly elated at the news. She nodded her head.

  “I am finally going to have a grandchild!” Thomas Morgan boasted, pumping Nicholas’s hand with enthusiasm. “You’ve done a fine job, Son.” Thomas looked to Jenny, and his face softened with concern. “How are you feeling?”

  “Just fine, Father.”

  Molly digested the news. “I’m thrilled to know a new member of the family is forthcoming,” she said. Suddenly she exclaimed, “Where are my manners? You must be famished. I’ll start dinner right away!”

  Jenny followed Molly and offered to help.

  Father called her back. “Molly can manage alone,” he said. “I want to spend all the time I can with you, my dear, sweet Jenny.”

  “We can only stay the night, Thomas, since duty calls me home,” Nicholas said.

  They visited at length and then Molly stepped into the room. “The food is ready. I hope you’ve brought healthy appetites.”

  As they entered the dining room, Nicholas d
rew Jenny aside. His warm breath caressed her ear as he whispered, “Just follow my instructions, and everything will be fine.”

  Thomas observed them from afar.

  “I remember whispering endearments to my wife,” he sighed wistfully. A slow grin spread across his features. “Ah, to be young and in love.”

  The small group sat down to supper of sliced ham, cooked potatoes, corn, and hot buttered biscuits with jam. After the meal was over, Jenny insisted on helping with the dishes while Nicholas and Thomas went to the parlor to discuss farming and livestock.

  Strain showed on Nicholas’s face when he told Thomas of the difficult delivery of one of his mares earlier that day.

  “The mare nearly died, but she finally gave birth to a male offspring,” he sighed.

  Eventually their conversation turned to Jennifer, and Thomas took on a somber tone. “Nicholas, I want you to know how proud I am to have you for a son-in-law. You’re just the man Jenny needs. I know you’re taking good care of her, and that makes me happy, especially now that she is with child. She’ll need your constant understanding and kind words.” He leaned forward as if to share a secret. “They kind of go through a stage when they’re expecting,” he whispered. “I recall my own dear wife’s pregnancy.”

  Surprised at Thomas’s candor, Nicholas felt consumed with guilt for deceiving this gentle old man, particularly since he had placed his trust in him. He felt trapped. He couldn’t hurt Thomas by telling him the truth. Yet he had to stand his ground with Jenny or lose the plantation.

  A considerable time passed as Nicholas continued to converse with Thomas, then he excused himself to check on Jenny.

  Standing unobtrusively in the doorway, he watched Jenny move about the kitchen as she dried the dishes and stacked them in the cupboard. Contentment replaced her usually troubled features, and he knew it was from being around those she loved. Again, guilt gnawed at him for depriving her of a very special existence. Still, he knew he couldn’t do otherwise at this late date. He saw a smile light Molly’s features and listened as she addressed Jenny.

  “I have some good news for you, Jenny. Wade Dillon and I plan to marry in two months.”

  Jenny’s mouth flew open.

  “You and Wade are getting married? I am so happy for you!”

  Molly hugged her with affection. “I know you are, Dear. I’m sure we’ll be as happy as you and Nicholas.”

  Nicholas saw a flicker of distress cross Jenny’s features and watched her mask her feelings lest Molly sense the truth. He wanted to get on his knees and beg her forgiveness for causing chaos in her life, but his stubborn pride wouldn’t let him.

  Jenny saw Nicholas standing in the doorway, his broad shoulder resting against the doorframe. Her eyes locked with his for several seconds, but she couldn’t fathom his thoughts. He didn’t speak, but nodded and then returned to the parlor.

  The friction between them had gone unnoticed by Molly as she put away the last pot and continued to prattle on about her impending marriage. “Of course, we’ll have to find another housekeeper for Thomas, but mind you, it will have to be someone special. Even so, you can count on me to check on your father. Wade and I will only be a few miles away.”

  “I’ll ask Aunt Thelma for a recommendation. She’ll know someone dependable to help Father. Thank you for the devotion you’ve given Father and me all these years. You’re a special person and deserve a happy life of your own.”

  Molly’s eyes misted with emotion. “I appreciate your kind words, Jenny. You and Thomas are like family to me.”

  The women joined the men in the parlor until it came time to retire. Molly addressed Jenny. “You and Nicholas can sleep in your room. I aired the sheets and turned back the covers,” she said kindly.

  As Molly directed her attention to Thomas, Jenny gave Nicholas a scathing look. In a voice so low that only he could hear, she said, “I can thank you for this!”

  Nicholas chuckled. “You’re the one who chose to run home to Daddy.”

  Jenny refrained from speaking out. How dare he be so arrogant in my father’s house?

  The day’s events had taken their toll on Thomas. “I, too, shall retire,” he announced.

  “I’ll see you to bed,” Jenny offered, rising from the sofa, wishing to delay going to her own room.

  Molly sprang to her feet. “I’ll take care of Thomas. You need your rest, Jenny.”

  Finding no graceful way out of prolonging her time with Nicholas, Jenny planted a kiss upon her father’s brow. “See you in the morning, Father.”

  Nicholas, too, bade Molly and Thomas goodnight, then followed Jenny to their chamber.

  Jenny remained silent as she searched her grip and pulled out a nightgown. She prepared to put it on, then stopped abruptly. In her haste to leave Small Timbers, she had grabbed the revealing negligee that Thelma had given her for her wedding. She had little choice but to wear it since she had no other sleeping apparel with her. She struggled with the buttons on her riding habit.

  “Let me help you,” Nicholas said. Deftly, he freed the catches and started to assist her out of her clothes.

  Jenny drew back. “I am capable of undressing myself.”

  “Suit yourself,” he said and shed his garments. Slipping his unclad body between the sheets, he fixed his eyes on Jenny.

  Jenny gulped with embarrassment. “You didn’t bring a nightshirt?”

  “No, Jenny. I don’t sleep in them, remember.”

  Jenny turned her back to him. She dropped her clothes to the floor and slipped into her nightgown. Extinguishing the light, she crept into bed. Nicholas reached out and drew her into his embrace, his musky scent surrounding her.

  “What are you doing?” Jenny whispered. “Just because we share the same bed doesn’t give you other rights!”

  Nicholas sent her a devilish grin and arched his brow seductively. His eyes burned with passion, and he winked at her. He smothered her with kisses, then raised her nightgown and straddled her. He ran his tongue enticingly over her taut breast and sensuously massaged her body.

  Jenny made a feeble attempt to ignore the fire consuming her. “Let me go!” she moaned, yet she knew in her heart that she wanted to stay in his embrace.

  “I feel the passion in you,” Nicholas murmured, his warm breath caressing her earlobe. He covered her body and penetrated her. He moved slowly, then picked up momentum.

  Jenny moaned, inwardly crying out for fulfillment. Wrapping her arms around his robust frame, she accepted him. Driven with desire, she responded passionately and felt her body swept away with ecstasy.

  Nicholas kissed her fervently, and breathless, he lay over her.

  “You have given me pleasure beyond my imagination,” he whispered.

  Jenny lay beneath Nicholas, her thoughts in turmoil. She had experienced a new and wonderful feeling and felt truly fulfilled at last. Even now, his masculine physique played havoc with her senses, but she kept her feelings tucked inside. Besides, she was afraid he might gloat over his conquest. She didn’t want the moment to end, but to cover her weakness, she snapped, “Please move from me and allow me to breathe.”

  Slowly, Nicholas withdrew from her voluptuous form. “I should have known it was too good to last,” he replied harshly. “You have a viper’s tongue, Jenny. Goodnight.” He rolled onto his side.

  Sleep didn’t come so easily for Jennifer as thoughts of Nicholas churned in her head. His stinging words still echoed in her mind. She wondered why she felt hurt by his words. Do I really want to please him? Why do I act like I need his approval? He married me to further his own means. Worse, she felt betrayed by her own body, for only moments into his seduction she had encouraged him to make love to her. Thoroughly confused, she was angry with Nicholas, yet she wanted him. How ludicrous! she thought, attempting to gain control of
her emotions.

  Much later into the night, Jenny slept. Dreaming of his embrace, she molded herself against his frame.

  Nicholas awakened to her warm skin touching his flesh. He knew there was now much more between the two of them than a legal document. He would have been drawn to her under any circumstances. Forcing her into marriage was his way of holding onto her. Perhaps it was good that she was expecting his child. Suddenly he felt proud and wished life was better between them. Yet, he wasn’t sure how to go about correcting the pain he had caused. He knew Jenny resented him for coercing her into marriage and, now, motherhood. Because of her misgivings, he couldn’t bring himself to lay open his feelings. He cared for Jenny and wanted her to remain his wife but wondered how he could convince her. She was sure to question his motives if he changed them in midstream. Most likely, she would think his only interest was in bringing an heir into the world.

  As the moonlight shone into the room, he gazed down at Jenny’s sleeping form. He recalled the compassion she felt for others where fate had put them together. If she hadn’t been helping the desolate from the ravages of the storm, she wouldn’t have been in Greenville. Yet, because of that night when she innocently came to his room, he had married her. Now they were bound in more than matrimony. He also realized why he had gone to the study to meditate the nights away. He craved Jenny’s love and couldn’t stand the coldness she showed toward him. He had only himself to blame for his unhappy predicament, but somehow he must win Jenny over. He couldn’t stand to give her up now, and only with the passing of time, could he assuage her troubled heart and win her love. How long will it take to win her heart? he pondered.

  Chapter 10

  Early the next morning Jenny and Nicholas prepared to leave. As they stepped outside, William came from the barn. His blue eyes danced. “I brought your horses,” he said, holding the reins tightly. He gave Nicholas a cordial nod. His maturing face beamed at Jenny, and he broke into a wide grin, exposing crooked teeth. “It’s so good to see you, Mrs. Grant.”