So Good
Page 10
I was out of my chair and had her in my arms seconds later. With my hand on her nape, I moved us backward until the wall stopped our retreat.
Mine.
I dipped my gaze down to her lips and didn’t stop myself from taking her mouth in a deep, penetrating kiss, fucking her like I had between her legs with my mouth and cock.
I groaned, not stopping myself even though I should have.
“Matthew,” she moaned against my mouth and I slammed my hands on the wall beside her head, pressing my hard cock into her belly. A hoarse groan left me when she stroked her tongue with mine.
“I need you,” she whispered against my lips.
Fuck, I needed her too.
I slid my hands down the wall, touched her shoulders, stroked her arms, and took hold of her hands. I lifted her arms up, resting the back of her hands on the wall and moving my thumbs over to the pulse points at her wrists. They beat frantically.
My cock throbbed behind my jeans. I wanted to be buried deep inside of her.
She moaned, let her head fall back against the wall, and I started kissing her throat. I thrust against her belly again, and wanted to just pull her pants down, tear her panties aside, get my dick out, and push right into her wet little body.
I didn’t stop myself from groaning against her neck.
“Fuck, baby girl.”
“Take me. Right here. Right now.”
I reached between our bodies, starting to unbutton my pants. I’d fuck her right here, right now, just like she wanted. I’d fuck her against the wall until she came all over my cock.
But the sound of the front door opening and closing had me lifting my head from the crook of her neck and looking over my shoulder.
“Ivy? Matthew?” Stephan called out. “I have good news.” I could hear him setting his things down in the foyer, but it was like everything was in slow motion. “I got a full-time job offer.”
Before I could move or put Ivy back on her feet, I watched as Stephan walked in.
He stopped in his tracks as he looked at us, as he stared at me holding his daughter up against the wall. For several seconds, the three of us didn’t speak, didn’t move, hell, didn’t even fucking breathe. We were all frozen in place.
I should have put Ivy down, but I couldn’t move. Stephan stared between us, his expression showing he didn’t know what the fuck was going on.
“Matthew,” she whispered softly.
I looked at her, saw she was scared as hell, and finally I set her down.
“Dad,” Ivy said softly, her voice telling how this affected her.
I wanted to protect her, to shield her from all of this, from the downfall that was surely about to happen.
* * *
Stephan
There was no fucking way I was seeing what was right in front of me. No fucking way Matthew had my little girl pressed up against the wall, his dick hard, what they were about to do really damn clear.
Matthew had set Ivy on the ground, but I didn’t miss how he pushed her behind him, as if to protect her from me.
I saw red, was fucking livid. I couldn’t have stopped myself if I tried.
I started throwing fists left and right, but Matthew just took it. He didn’t fight back, didn’t try and stop me.
The sound of Ivy’s voice couldn’t pierce the thickness of my anger. “How long have you been fucking my daughter behind my back, Matthew?” I cursed those words out. I swung out again, over and over again.
Still, Matthew took everything I gave.
Matthew grunted when I connected my fist with his mouth. I saw the way his lip split, watched as the blood welled up and then dripped down his chin.
“So instead of waiting for me to come back home to talk to me about all of this, you claiming my daughter like she’s yours was the right move?” I didn’t hold off the growl that left me. “She’s my nineteen-year-old daughter, Matthew.” I started to pace, my emotions wild and turbulent, violent.
I didn’t stop the low sound that came from me. All I fucking felt was rage.
I charged forward again and tackled Matthew to the ground. We crashed against the wall, a few pictures fell to the ground, glass shattering and the sound of Ivy crying out ringing in my head.
I glanced over at Ivy between hits, seeing that she had her hands covering her mouth as she looked on in horror. We should have stopped fighting for her sake, but all I felt was this deep burning rage filling me.
And as I slammed my hand into Matthew’s face again, my brother refused to fight, to hit me back.
“I won’t fight you, Stephan,” Matthew roared out right before I threw my fist into his gut.
That just pissed me off even more. I slammed my fist into any available inch of Matthew I could reach. All I heard was the sound of my heart pounding in my ears. All I felt was the rush of blood moving through my veins.
Matthew pushed me away. “Stephan. Stop. I’m not going to fucking fight you.”
“Come on, brother. Fucking hit me back. Fight me.”
I heard Ivy screaming out. A moment later, amidst the hitting and grunting, the sound of roars that came from me, I sensed Ivy coming closer.
The sound of crunching filled my head and I felt her touch my shoulder. She tried to pull me back, but right now there was nothing short of a SWAT team pulling me off of Matthew.
She tugged harder, screamed out my name to get my attention, but the force of our fighting had her letting go. She cried out in pain and I instantly stopped.
“Fucking hell, Stephan,” Matthew roared out and pushed me away as he went over to Ivy.
I stood there and watched as he tended to her, making sure she was okay. Blood covered his face, and I could see he was in pain, but he focused solely on Ivy.
Matthew straightened when it was clear Ivy was fine, pulled her behind him, and narrowed his eyes at me.
“Stephan, I’m not fucking giving her up.”
I was shaking my head. No way I was hearing this bullshit. Blood marred Matthew’s face, his lips busted open, a cut above one of his eyes.
“Out of all of the women in the world you could have been with, Matthew, you go after my daughter, your fucking niece?”
“Step-niece,” Ivy said instantly. “We aren’t related. It’s not wrong.”
I shook my head as I looked at her. “He’s been part of your life, Ivy. He’s family.”
She looked at Matthew again. “I love him, Dad,” she whispered.
I couldn’t speak, didn’t know what to say.
“I tried to stay away,” Matthew said, the sorrow in his voice clear.
“We didn’t want you finding out this way.”
“Yeah, that’s pretty fucking clear,” I said, hearing how pissed off I sounded. I started pacing the floor, running my hand over the back of my head and breathing in and out.
“We were going to tell you,” Matthew said and took a step forward.
“Oh, you were?” I said sarcastically. “When? After you defiled her against my wall? After you betrayed me over and over again?”
Matthew growled out, “Be pissed at me. Hate me, fucking kick my ass, Stephan, but don’t ever fucking talk about Ivy that way.” There was this warning tone in his voice. “I won’t fight you over this because I admit being with her behind your back was wrong, but I will fucking kick your ass if you disrespect her.”
My chest was rising and falling fast, and I clenched and unclenched my hands at my sides. As I stared at both of them, a part of me wanted to be happy for my daughter, that she was loved and was in love. But another part, a bigger one, couldn’t get past the fact this was my brother in a relationship with my daughter. Blood related or not, we were all family.
“Dad,” she said softly and moved closer to me. “This wasn’t something we planned. It just happened.”
I hated that she was upset and that I had made it worse.
“You can’t help who you love,” she said and I knew she was talking about my relationship with Cora.
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I couldn’t look at her, not after all of this, not with how I looked: upset, disappointed, shocked … sad.
What the hell had happened? What a fucking shit storm this had turned out to be.
22
Matthew
I knew being with Ivy would ruin things, knew Stephan would be upset, but fuck, actually living through it, seeing the rage on his face, feeling the punches he threw … really drilled it all home.
Stephan had headed out back, the door slamming shut, the silence deafening.
“I should go talk with him,” Ivy said and I turned to face her.
“No, baby. Let me handle it.” I walked up to her and cupped her cheeks, smoothed my thumbs along her cheeks. “Let me see if this is salvageable.”
I gave her one more kiss before turning and heading out back. I closed the door behind me and stared at Stephan. He leaned against the banister of the deck, his hands clasped in front of him.
There was the faint smell of exhaust in the air from the few cars that had driven by, and the sound of kids playing in the distance. A truck blasting rap music drove by the house, drowning out my thoughts and how I hoped this would all go.
Stephan looked over his shoulder at me, and I saw the cigarette hanging from his lips.
“I thought you quit years ago,” I asked and stepped onto the deck.
He pulled the cigarette out of his mouth and I saw it wasn’t even lit.
“I did, but I keep one in case the world ends or some shit.”
I snorted and leaned against the railing a few feet away. “The end of the world? Seriously, man?”
He didn’t crack a smile as he stared straight ahead, the unlit cigarette hanging between his fingers. “It feels like the fucking end of the world.”
Stephan looked at me again. “You look like shit.”
My face throbbed at the mention of the fight, but I welcomed the pain. I deserved it.
For a few moments, the only sound was all the noise pollution surrounding us. And then Stephan straightened and crossed his arms over his chest.
“I fucked up by not telling you, Stephan.”
He stayed silent.
“I love you. You’re my brother, my family, but I won’t let her go. I can’t. I love her enough to deal with any repercussion being together causes.”
Stephan exhaled, sounding defeated.
“I’ve never loved anyone the way I love her, Stephan. She’s it for me.”
“It’s wrong,” my brother said again, as if he wanted to say it over and over again. I couldn’t blame him.
“It doesn’t feel wrong.”
Stephan closed his eyes and shook his head.
The silence stretched out between us for a few seconds. There was a hell of a lot I wanted to talk about, but didn’t know what to say that hadn’t already been spoken.
And still Stephan remained silent.
“It was wrong to do it behind your back, but that’s the only thing I’m apologizing for. Because what I feel for Ivy is real.”
Stephan stared at me. “I know you care about her, but see it from my point of view.”
I did.
“I know you need time to process all of this, to understand it even, and I can give you that time.” I felt my body grow harder. “But hear me on this, Stephan. You can beat my ass and I won’t fight back, but I won’t let her go.”
I’d said all I could. It was up to Stephan to know that it was the truth.
“I don’t know whether I can be okay with this.” He ran a hand over the back of his head. “She’s my daughter, Matthew. You’re my—”
“I know,” I said softly. “Believe me. I beat myself up over it for so long it was eating away at me.”
“A part of me wants to pack her up and get her the fuck out of here. I want to protect her.”
“So do I,” I said with determination in my voice.
We stared at each other for long moments.
“I love her, Stephan. I’ll take care of her with my life.”
“People won’t understand,” he said instantly.
I shook my head. “They don’t have to. No one has to understand because it’s no one else’s business. The only opinion we care about is yours, Stephan. That’s all that matters.”
23
Ivy
I found my father working on his car in the garage, the sound of classic rock pumping through an old, outdated radio he had sitting on his workbench. The banging of a tool hitting the cement seemed overly loud, but not as loud as my heart racing.
It had been several days since he’d found out about Matthew and me, and although we hadn’t ignored each other, I definitely felt the tension between us.
I took another step into the garage, seeing his big body hunched under the hood of his car. He cursed and pulled back, shaking his hand and looking down at it. And then he glanced over at me, a momentary expression of surprise covering his face before he masked it.
“Hey,” I said softly and smiled.
“Hey,” he said roughly and went over to his workbench to grab another tool.
More silence descended and I felt the awkwardness grow. I twisted my hands in front of me, looking down at them, hating that there was this wall between us. I couldn’t blame him, but I wished he would talk to me about it.
I heard him clear his throat and I glanced up, seeing him lean against his workbench, his arms crossed over his chest and his focus on me.
“We should probably talk about this, right?” His voice was pitched low, but it was gentle, maybe even understanding.
I nodded, not trusting my voice in that moment. But silence wouldn’t solve anything. “Although I don’t know where to start,” I finally said.
“I’m not sure either, sweetheart,” he said softly. “But I spoke with Matthew. He pretty much told me everything.” He looked down at his boots and exhaled again. “It’s hard to grasp, I won’t lie. But at the end of the day, I just want you to be happy.” He looked up at me again and I swallowed roughly. “I just want to know that you’re taken care of, that you succeed in life, and that you’re loved. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
God, I was going to cry if this kept up.
“Your happiness has been the only thing that I’ve ever been concerned about, Ivy. It’s why I kept my relationship with Cora from you for longer than I should have. That’s why I didn’t tell you about me losing my job right away.” He shook his head slowly and stared me in the eyes. “Because I figured that would be a blow to your happiness, and I didn’t want that.”
“I am happy. I’m really happy, Dad. And I’m happy for you.” He gave me another smile but it was sad.
“You’ve just been through a lot. Losing your mother, dealing with your old man dating a woman close to your age, worrying about if we’d lose the house or not.” He cleared his throat as if he were uncomfortable talking about this. “I felt a lot of shame and guilt.”
I was the one shaking my head now. “You never have to feel those things. I’m happy for you and Cora. I’m glad you found a job. I had no doubt that things would work out.”
“Yeah, and it’s partly thanks to Matthew. He stepped up. Manned up. He helped me when I was down and had no one to turn to. He didn’t give me shit for being with Cora, didn’t judge me for the age gap. But I guess I couldn’t see past everything ... him being my step-brother, the age difference between the two of you.” He sighed again. “Him being with my daughter. I just couldn’t see past any of it.”
I didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to smooth things out, and although I could see my father had come to terms with it all, I wanted us to be back to where we had been before.
So I stepped up to him, just a foot from him now, and wrapped my arms around his waist to give him a hug. In that moment, I felt like a little girl, looking up at my father because he held the world in his hands.
He wrapped his arms around me and just held me, and I closed my eyes and let everything else drift away.
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“I’m glad you’re happy,” he whispered against my hair and I smiled.
“I’m glad we’re both happy.”
He kissed the crown of my head again. “It won’t be easy though,” he said again. “People won’t be kind.”
I pulled back and looked up at him. “I know.” He pushed some of my hair away from my cheek. “But you’re strong, like your mother was. She didn’t take crap from anyone. And if they give you shit, you give them shit right back.” I chuckled. “You love him and he loves you, and that’s all a father can want for his daughter.”
He pulled me in for another hug and it was nice, comforting, and it gave me hope that everything would be fine.
* * *
I looked up to see my dad by the grill, a roll of hotdogs placed on the grate, the sound and scent of sizzling meat filling the air.
Cora was standing by Georgia, and Charlie was beside her. It was just a little get together, one my father had organized, which surprised the hell out of me.
He’d never been one for gatherings, but there were a lot of things I’d noticed changing in him and his newfound happiness.
Over the last few weeks, Cora had been a steady constant in our lives, and I couldn’t deny that I loved seeing her with my father. It was clear he made her happy and she him. He seemed younger, more full of life when she was here.
I felt the heavy weight of hands gently land on my shoulders, giving them a squeeze. I tipped my head back to see Matthew standing there, looking down at me with a smile on his face. He leaned down and kissed the top of my head and I closed my eyes, loving that we could show this small affection in front of everybody and not have to feel shame about it or worry about judgment.
I wished he’d really kiss me, place his lips on mine, a kiss that would have my toes curling. But he didn’t like showing affection in front of my father, even if he was okay with our relationship.