The Side Effects of You

by Anna Black

  “I didn’t order that,” I said, looking at the wine.

  “I did,” Quentin said. “I know you said one drink, but I miss your company, Andrea.” He stared at me for a moment, then looked up at the server and gave her a nod. She set the glass down in front of me and walked away.

  I wanted to refuse it, but what the hell? Since I didn’t have work the next morning, and since Jeremiah was still gone on his men’s retreat, I accepted it. I would just miss the first service at church in the morning. Truth was, I had missed Quentin too, and for some reason, I didn’t feel bad being out with him. After all, my marriage was over. So I continued to play catch-up with him. I learned he was a campus recruiter for Chicago State University. I had no idea what that meant, so he happily explained it to me.

  We talked until closing, and after he walked me to my car, I didn’t stop him when he kissed my lips softly.

  “Go home with me, Andrea. Let me be with you tonight, and afterward, if you want nothing else, I promise I won’t bother you again.”

  Back off, Satan, I said to myself.

  “I want to, Q. I do. But I can’t have that on my conscience. Two wrongs never make it right.”

  “I know, Drea, but you deserve to be loved, held, and showered with affection. He hasn’t touched you in over two years. I know how it feels to have a desire to be touched.”

  True. I hated that I had shared the entire truth about Jeremiah and me with Quentin. Damn wine.

  “I know you want to be touched,” he said. He caressed my cheek, and I grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it.

  “I do, Quentin, but I’m not that kinda woman. Even though I’m miserable, I can’t break that vow. God doesn’t excuse misconduct because we feel some type of way. You just walked back into my life. I don’t want us to make things messy by jumping into this physical trap.”

  “You’re right, and I’m sorry for crossing any lines with you. I respect you, but I won’t lie. I’m still attracted to you, and I really would like another chance to be with you. I’m a patient man. I’ll wait for you. I’ll dance to the beat of your drum. Just know, with me, it’s not a physical trap. I want more than that.”

  “Thank you, Quentin. I should be going.” I reached for my car door.

  “Your welcome.”

  “Good night, Quentin.”

  “Good night,” he said one last time. He shut my door, and I pressed the button to start my car.

  “Dear Lord, please forgive me for lusting after Quentin. And more than that, forgive me for leaving Jeremiah. I’ll be talking to a lawyer soon, so please, God, have mercy on me. In Jesus’s name, amen.” I pulled out of the parking lot and headed home.

  * * *

  The next morning, I was awakened by the phone. Man, I shouldn’t have drunk last night, I thought. I didn’t feel like moving. It was the same mysterious number. This time, I answered quickly.

  “Hello?”

  “Mother Young?”

  “Yes, this is she,” I said.

  “This is Helen McCoy, Franklin’s wife.”

  “Yes, good morning, Sister Helen.”

  “I wanted to know if we can meet to talk.”

  “Sure. What’s this about?”

  “I’m not sure if it’s wise to say what it is over the phone.”

  My breath caught. Oh boy, my worst nightmare. Jeremiah!

  “What’s going on, Helen? Did something happen to my husband?” I said in a panic. Jeremiah and Franklin were pretty tight, and I knew they were on the retreat together.

  “No. Nothing like that.”

  Relieved, I let the air escape from my lungs. “Okay, then, what else is there? It’s okay to tell me over the phone.”

  “No, I’d rather tell you this face-to-face. Can we meet after church this morning?”

  “Sure, Sister Helen. Where would you like to meet?”

  I got up from my bed. I was fully awake by now, and my heart was racing. This would be the first time I had to deal with any issues related to my husband and another woman. I knew that was the only other important thing she would want to say to me in person.

  She gave me the name of a restaurant and its location, and for the first time in ten years, I didn’t go to church. I showered, dressed, and was at the restaurant on time. I couldn’t wait to hear what she had to say.

  Chapter Ten

  Josephina

  Monday rolled around quickly, and I was back at work. Ana had had to get a couple of stitches over her eye. When I’d asked her who had done this to her, she wouldn’t say.

  “Good morning,” a baritone voice said.

  I looked up from the magazine I was browsing. It had been a slow morning, but I was posted behind the desk, instead of in my living room ogling the monitors. “Jayden, hey. I’m so sorry I didn’t come back the other night. I had some issues with my baby girl and me. I—”

  He stopped me. “Josie, it’s okay. I think I came on a little too strong.”

  “No, no, no. You are perfect. I just walked in to find my daughter’s face all bruised up, and yesterday we spent, like, the entire afternoon in the ER. I’m really sorry.”

  “Listen, I’m fine. I’m about to head out to the firm, but I wanted to know if you’d have dinner with me tonight.”

  My heart stopped. He wanted to see me again, after I’d played a move on him the other night.

  “Yes, yes, yes, of course. I’d love to.” I accepted his invitation with a bright smile on my face.

  “Is seven good?”

  “It’s perfect.” I looked him up and down. He was the most handsome man who had ever asked me out.

  “Good. And wear a dress. I want to check out your legs.” He winked. He gave me another warm smile and then exited the building.

  A dress, huh? He had to be planning to take me someplace nice. I quickly dialed Sam. It was early, and when she answered, I knew she was still sleeping.

  In a groggy tone, she said, “Hello.”

  “Sam, I’m sorry to wake you, but I really need to go to that salon you went to. Jayden wants to take me to dinner, and he said to wear a dress. I want this night to be perfect.”

  “Josie, honey, it’s Monday. There are no salons open on Monday.”

  “You’re kidding me, right?”

  “Supercuts maybe, but no regular salons.”

  “Oh my, my, my. Can you call Andrea? She’s your friend. She’d make an exception for you, right?”

  “Josie, I just met her a few weeks ago. We’ve hung out a few times, but I don’t know. We are cool, but I don’t feel comfortable asking for such a huge favor.”

  “Oh, please. Oh, please, can you ask her? I have money saved up. I’m willing to pay whatever. She just may say yes. I’d ask her, but she knows you better, Sam, and I’m desperate. She made you look so beautiful, and I just don’t want to walk out looking crazy. You can’t trust just anybody with your hair, you know.”

  “Okay. I’ll call her, but don’t get your hopes up.”

  “I won’t. Just try. This is, like, the first man that I’ve been out with since my sorry-ass excuse for a husband got locked down again. I just want tonight to be special, and I want to look good.”

  “I’ll see what I can do. I’ll call you back.”

  “Okay. Thank you so much, Sam.”

  “Don’t thank me yet,” she said. A couple of minutes after, Jayden texted me, asking where would we meet, and I said at Sammie’s. I couldn’t take the risk of one of my employees seeing us together.

  Chapter Eleven

  Samantha

  Not wanting to make the call, I scrolled down my numbers on the screen of my cell phone, swiped Andrea’s name, and waited for the call to connect.

  “Good morning,” she answered.

  “Good morning, Andrea. How are you?”

  “I’m okay. How are you?”

  She didn’t sound okay to me, but we weren’t good girlfriends, so I didn’t pry.

  “I’m good. Listen, I know you may say, ‘Hell,
no,’ to this question, but my friend Josie has a date tonight. She hasn’t been out in decades, and she wants to get glammed up. Can you please perform the miracle on her that you performed on me?” I bit the corner of my lip, waiting for the “Hell, no.”

  “Well, you know I’m not open on Mondays, but I need to get out of this house. If you can meet me at my salon, I’ll take care of her.”

  “You’d do that?”

  “Yes, ma’am. I need a breather, and hair and makeup normally ease my mood. It helps me to relax my mind. Hair is my only escape, and I need it.”

  “Okay. Thanks so much. I’ll come with her. What time?”

  “Well, my kids are in school and pretty much fend for themselves when they get in. What time is her date?”

  “I’m not sure. Let me text her.”

  “Go ahead.”

  “Okay. Give me a second to see what she says.” I texted, and Andrea held on. While waiting for Josie to reply, I said, “Listen, Andrea, you don’t sound like yourself. Do you want to talk? I mean, you can tell me to mind my business.”

  “No, everything is not okay. And the cut is so fresh, I’m not ready to talk about it.”

  “Okay, but I’m here,” I said. My phone alerted me that I had received a text. It was Josie. I read her text, then said, “She said seven.”

  “Well, I think she should come at about two, if possible. She will be my only client, but I definitely don’t want her to be late for her date.”

  “Okay. I’ll let her know. Again, Andrea, thanks so much. Josie is going to be thrilled.”

  “I’m happy to help. By the way, how are things with you and Ethan? He seemed really nice.”

  I sat up in my bed with a big smile. “Aw, Andrea, he is. He is perfect. Too bad I have to stop seeing him.”

  “What? Why?”

  “I . . . I . . . I,” I stuttered. I wanted to tell her, but I had never shared my secret with anyone.

  “Listen, you don’t have to give me the reason.”

  “I know, Andrea. It’s just baggage from my first marriage.”

  “Say no more. I’ll be divorced very soon.”

  “Really? Is that why you need a breather?”

  “Yep. Actually, I need a drink.”

  “Well, you know you are welcome to come to my restaurant and get loaded.”

  “I know,” she said. I heard her voice crack.

  “Andrea, what did he do, honey?”

  She sniffled and didn’t say anything. I could tell she was crying.

  “Okay, Josie will be there by two, and afterward, you and I can go for drinks. We don’t have to go to my restaurant. We can hit a spot close to you.”

  “Okay,” she replied, still crying.

  “It’s going to be okay, Andrea, trust me. Whatever it is, it’s going to be okay.”

  “I know,” she said through her cries.

  “Okay. I’ll see you soon.”

  We hung up, and by then, I was definitely up. She had sounded terrible, and I wondered what had happened. Could her situation be worse than the situation I had been in with Charles?

  I suddenly felt sad for her. I felt really bad for both of us. I didn’t want to break up with Ethan, but I couldn’t bear to tell him the truth.

  Chapter Twelve

  Josephina

  Sitting in my living room, I nervously waited for Samantha to call me back. I wanted to look glamorous, and I hoped Andrea would agree to make me over. Seconds later, my phone finally rang. It was Sam, and I was too happy with the news. “She’ll do it? That’s great!” I yelled.

  “Yes, but you have to be there by two,” Sam said.

  My smile faded. “Two? I can’t be there by two. I don’t get off until two.”

  “Well, I don’t want to call and ask her to push it ahead, Josie. She’s already doing us both a huge favor.”

  “I know, but Angelica doesn’t come in from school until after three, and you know Ana’s face is horrible. And even if it wasn’t, you know she never helps me out.”

  “Well, you have to make a decision, sweetheart. I don’t want to call her and ask her to rearrange her schedule.”

  “I know. Give me a moment. I’ll call and see if my employee can come in one hour early. That way, Angelica can relieve her at nine.”

  “Okay. Check and call me back.”

  “Okay. I’ll call you back.”

  I hung up and texted Lacey, my front desk girl, and a couple minutes later, she replied that she would come in early. With that issue solved, I called Sam back and confirmed the location of the salon. I headed to my closet to find something to wear. I was sorely out of touch with the dating scene and the latest fashions. I hadn’t dated in a long time, so I wasn’t sure which regular clothes of mine would fit. I wore work attire most of the time and loungewear when I was at home. Since I had no social life, I had no fancy clothes. Something had to change. I wanted to join the land of the living, and Jayden was just a start.

  “What are you doing, Mom?” Ana asked. I didn’t know she had been standing in my bedroom doorway.

  “Looking for something decent to wear for my date tonight.”

  “No way. You have a date? With who?”

  “A guy,” I answered. I didn’t want her to know he was a hotel guest. I had been after her constantly to stay away from our male visitors.

  “I gathered that much, Ma. I mean, I never pictured you to be a lesbian.”

  “True. I’m not a lesbian. He is a guy I met at Sammie’s.” I shouldn’t have lied, but I was trying to set an example.

  “So, does Dad know you have a date?”

  “Ana, grow up. You know that your father and I are done. I told him the next time he went back to prison would be the last time he could call me his wife. We are divorced, so I can date.”

  “But you’re still married.” She was still in denial.

  I blew out a loud breath. I couldn’t believe she’d bring up her father right now. Un-freaking-believable. “Ana, for the last time, we are divorced. Your father is not my husband. Why are you in my room?”

  “Fine. I’m going to e-mail him and let him know you’re dating now.”

  “You can do what you will.” Ana had been the apple of my eye once, but she had become the thorn in my side.

  “Then I will,” she said smartly.

  Time to check her ass again.

  “You know what, Ana? Tell him. Tell your father that I’m a whore, a man-eater, or whatever you like. The bottom line is he is in prison. Your father couldn’t be a law-abiding citizen. He can’t touch me from prison, so go ahead. Run and e-mail him.” She looked down, and I continued. “Yes, that’s right, Princess Ana. My face has taken a beating worse than the one yours is wearing now, so run. Go e-mail him. Tell him what you want. You and your father have sucked every ounce of joy out of my life, and I can’t do you or him anymore. So tell him what you like! I just want to be done with you both. You two have done everything to destroy me, and I’m tired of you both!” I yelled.

  She stood there, arms folded, and I could feel she wanted to say something. I knew this would be the moment when she actually cursed me out or said she hated me, and I was ready to give her another ass whipping and show her to the door. No more. I couldn’t take another moment of her. I wanted her out of my hair.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

  I blinked. “Qué?” I knew I didn’t hear her right.

  “Lo siento, mami,” she repeated in Spanish. “I’ll help you find something really pretty to wear tonight, because a lot of your stuff is ugly. I have a ton of clothes.”

  I burst into laughter. “Ana, why are you so hard on me? Why can’t you just go with the flow and not be my difficult child?”

  “Because I’m more like him. I don’t mean to hurt you.” She looked at me, and her eyes welled up. I hated to see my baby’s face swollen and bruised. I wanted to go and get whoever had done this to her.

  “You’re like me too. You just have to stop rejecting your
good nature. I know you are a sweet girl, but it’s like you want this tough, bad girl image. And you want to hate me, as if I took your dad away or ran him off. I didn’t make him into who he is, and I certainly didn’t raise you to be like this, Ana. You didn’t learn this irrational behavior from me. I never showed you this type of life.”

  “Mami, papi was a well-known hood thug. I can’t be soft. I can’t act like you. I want respect.”

  “Oh, Ana, you can. You are a lady. You are not him. Respect and fear are two different things. You play tough and act like a hoodlum, and those who tolerate you fear you. They do not respect you. Respect starts when you respect yourself. You can act like a lady, Ana.”

  “I try not to be him, but I am, and I miss him so much,” she said, and then she began to cry. I hadn’t seen her cry in ages.

  “Come here, baby. I miss him too, and I can’t imagine how you feel as his daughter, but your father made his own choices, and you have to accept things for what they are. I didn’t even graduate high school, because I was running with and after your daddy. And then you came along. Once you came, I wanted more for my life, Ana. Don’t spiral into a life of craziness like him. You have a chance. You have a bright future.”

  “I just don’t know how else to be.”

  “Just start being you.”

  The front desk bell sounded suddenly. I didn’t want to stop this conversation with my daughter, but duty called.

  “I’ll be right back.”

  She nodded, and I went to take care of the person at the desk. It was a delivery guy. By the time I got back inside the apartment, Ana had put together a fabulous outfit for me, but it was a bit too sexy for my taste.

  “Oh, Ana, I don’t know about this sexy getup. I mean, I’m too old for clothes like this. This dress is so short.”

  “Ma, come on. You have beautiful legs, a plump ass, I mean bottom, and you are going to turn heads.”

  “I’m sure, but maybe not the kinda heads I wanna turn.”

  “Don’t worry. You are going to look sexy.”

  Letting down my guard, I agreed to try on the outfit. “You’re right. Thank you, baby.”