Warrior Spirit

by Alex Archer

  “You make it sound pretty bad.”

  “It is pretty bad,” Ken said. “Go into any bookstore and look in the self-help section. There’s a misnomer right there. None of those books help people help themselves. They all do the same thing—point out how lacking the reader’s life is and then nudge them on a path of responsibility avoidance. The books give a laundry list of excuses as to why the reader’s life is so utterly in chaos.”

  “Why don’t you write one, then?” Annja said.

  He laughed. “It wouldn’t be long enough. I’d write a page about how people should be able to look into the mirror and see what is truly reflected back, not what they wish was reflected.”

  “That’s it?”

  Ken pointed overhead. “You see the moon?”

  “Sure.”

  “And now look at the water below it. The moon’s reflection is there, too, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “But you also see the ripples in the pool coming from the water hitting the rocks and all that stuff.”

  “Of course.”

  “So it that a true reflection of the moon, then?”

  Annja frowned. “I’m not sure I follow you here, Ken.”

  Ken nodded. “I didn’t mean to get so out there on you. I hope I’m not spoiling the evening.”

  “You’re not.”

  “Good.” He sighed. “Think of it this way—a lot of people would look at the sky and see the moon and then look at the reflection of the moon and say they were two completely different things. On one level, they’d be right. After all, one is, in fact, the actual moon, and one is but a reflection. But on another level, the one they’re attempting to espouse, they’re wrong. Yes, the moon’s reflection does not look like the moon, but that doesn’t make it a false representation.”

  “The reflecting surface shows what it is presented with.”

  “Yes, but with all the distortion and disturbances in place, as well. The reflection of the moon in the water shows how the moon truly appears in this time and place. The person looking at the moon—in other words, the person looking in the mirror—might want the refection to be perfect, the way they want to see themselves. But in reality, there is no perfection in the person looking in the mirror. There are faults and problems that need to be addressed. Only then will the reflecting surface be as peaceful and calm as what it reflects.”

  “So, that’s the big truth?” Annja asked.

  “One of them,” Ken said. “But it’s a big one. There’s an epidemic of victimization in society as a whole these days. I thought it was just isolated to the United States and its support system of charlatans, talk-show hosts and early-morning-news idiots, but I’ve since seen that the rest of the world is rapidly acquiring the same lack of self-realization.”

  Annja nodded. “I’ve actually wondered about that. Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to blame someone else for their problems—”

  “That the problems never get solved,” Ken said. “That’s exactly it.”

  Annja sighed. “I knew someone. A good friend of mine a long time ago who always tried to take the easy path. Instead of working harder, she would always look for the path of least resistance. She came from a broken home, abused, that sort of thing. All her life she blamed her failings on that past.”

  “What happened to her?”

  Annja shook her head, chasing away the memory. “She took the path of least resistance off a rooftop in Chicago.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Annja nodded. “Yeah, well, I hope she’s at least happier now than she was in this life.”

  “You think she was right?”

  “Of course not. God, using that line of thinking, I’d have just as much right to kill myself as the next idiot. I never knew my parents. I had problems growing up just like everyone else. But I dealt with it. I didn’t let it be an anchor that would end up drowning me.”

  “You’re a true warrior, Annja.”

  She looked at Ken and smiled. “Well, I appreciate the sentiment.”

  He shook his head. “It’s not empty sentiment, but a statement of fact. What I’ve seen of you, you don’t let adversity beat you. You rise above it. Look at how you’ve been today.”

  “How have I been today?”

  “Your shoulder was killing you earlier. I could see the strain on your face. At times, it looked pretty bad and I thought we might really need to get you down to the hospital. But I could also see the determination in you. Your spirit commanded and your body obeyed. Even as you sit there right now, your pain has lessened, hasn’t it?”

  “Somewhat, yes.”

  “So you see that it does work. Your mind and spirit are more than capable of healing what ails you. You only need to get yourself out of the way in order for the process to be utter and complete.”

  Annja’s eyes narrowed. “What are you driving at?”

  Ken smiled. He pointed at her. “That’s where you need to go.”

  Annja took a breath and closed her eyes. She replayed the words Ken had spoken and felt her gut pushing her in a direction that seemed unrealistic, but when she put aside her conscious thought, she realized it all made perfect sense.

  She opened her eyes. “Well, that was interesting.”

  “Was it?”

  “Yes.” Annja smiled. “I didn’t expect something so fast.”

  “It’s amazing what we’re capable of when we get out of our own way and let it happen naturally.”

  “Speaking of natural,” Annja said. She stood up.

  “Are you going somewhere?”

  She smiled. “Don’t you know already?”

  He shook his head. “I told you before. I’m not a mind reader, although it might seem like that sometimes. I merely respond to the fluctuations I feel in nature and from other people. Sometimes that enables me to have an innate understanding of what people might be considering, but I would never call it mind reading or telepathy or any of that stuff. To me, those are traps along the way to true enlightenment.”

  Annja took a breath. “How would mind reading be a trap?”

  “If you knew you had that power, what would your reaction be?”

  “Amazement.”

  “Granted. But for most people, they would then focus on that power, to the exclusion of everything else they might accomplish. They’d become trapped in the lone manifestation of their potential rather than continuing the journey to see the even greater skills that await further down the path.”

  “You are an amazing person to talk to,” Annja said. She started unbuttoning her shirt.

  Ken’s eyes opened wider. “Annja.”

  She shook her head. “It seemed crazy at first but now it seems like the most natural thing in the world, doesn’t it?”

  “I suppose, but—”

  Annja shook her head. “I mean, I shouldn’t even fight it any longer. It’s right here in front of me and I’ve been trying to deny what I felt. But that’s not the way to do it, is it? According to you, I should just go boldly forth and embrace what I feel, right?”

  “I suppose so.”

  Annja pulled off her shirt and unhooked her bra. The cold air wrapped around her, making her teeth chatter. “Hey, it’s a little cold out here.”

  Ken watched her with a strange look on his face. She smiled. “What?”

  He shook his head. “Nothing. Please don’t let me stand in the way of whatever it is you’re about to do.”

  Annja slid out of her pants and panties and laid them on the ground. Then she stood before Ken completely naked, wearing only a smile.

  “Don’t you know, silly? I’m going under that waterfall.”

  29

  Annja could feel Ken’s eyes on her as she stepped into the frigid waters of the pond. Whatever vestiges of modesty she had left had vanished when her panties had come off.

  For his part, Ken seemed unaffected by the sight of Annja standing naked before him, something that only disturbed Annja for a moment before she rea
lized that he would not allow any emotion to show on his face when presented with that situation. Inside, he must have been one hormonally carbonated mess, she decided.

  She stood on a small rock facing the deeper water. Her legs were already thundering with shakes brought on by the cold.

  What in the world was she doing? She almost turned around and strode out of the water, but knew she couldn’t. She knew she wouldn’t.

  Annja stepped off the rock and sank into the water.

  It took her breath away like a kick to the chest.

  She surfaced and sucked air. “God!”

  Ken stood on the bank of the pond watching her but made no move to assist. Annja knew he’d come in if she needed him.

  But she didn’t need him.

  At least not yet.

  She made her way toward the waterfall. The closer she got, the colder the water became. She could see her breath misting in front of her face in stark contrast to the water.

  There was a narrow ledge of stone directly beneath the main torrent of water.

  Annja stepped onto it.

  The sheer weight of the water almost crumbled her resolve. Combined with the freezing temperatures, just standing there would be a workout in and of itself. Annja wondered if her legs, after hiking for hours, would be able to stand the exertion.

  She squatted and then stood up slowly.

  Her entire body shook. She couldn’t suck in breaths and exhale fast enough. The cold and the force of the water were making her shudder. If she didn’t figure out how to get through this quickly, she was sure she would get hypothermia and die.

  She thought about what Ken had talked about. She thought about the few times she’d seen other people trying to meditate and that sort of thing.

  Isn’t it really just breathing? she thought. I should try to count my breaths like I’ve seen them do in movies.

  Without thinking, Annja brought her hands together in front of her stomach and tried tuning out the waterfall and the cold. She took a deep breath in and tried to exhale it slowly, drawing it out as long as she could.

  She gasped and sputtered.

  “Dammit!”

  More water seemed to be crashing down on her, as if someone had turned on the faucet full bore way high up on the mountain. She was going to drown standing under a freezing waterfall trying to meditate, of all things.

  If her friends could see her now.

  She almost grinned, but her teeth were chattering far too much.

  She tried blocking out the water and the cold again. Maybe if I think hard enough about other things, she decided. That might work.

  She thought about Ken and the hunt for the vajra and the crazy things they’d been through so far on the trip.

  But the water roared in her ears. And the cold sucked all the warmth from her body.

  She shook her head. It wasn’t working. How long was she expected to stay here under this onslaught? What was she trying to prove to herself? If this was where she was supposed to be, then why wasn’t anything happening yet? Why wasn’t she able to stand there in the freezing water while an avalanche of water dumped itself on top of her? It didn’t make any sense, and Annja found herself getting angry that something as silly as a cold waterfall was going to kill her. The sheer idiocy of the thing drove her nuts. She was an accomplished archaeologist, someone who had put in her dirt time on digs that were anything but glamorous, and was now poised for a certain degree of fame and prestige. But she was standing beneath a frigid waterfall in the mountains of Japan trying to accomplish God knew what while a guy on shore that she just might have a serious crush on watched her attempt to figure out nature and the path to enlightenment.

  She sighed.

  I’m a dope.

  She was about to move off the ledge when she noticed that the water didn’t feel quite so cold anymore. And neither did the crushing weight of the water feel so suffocating.

  Something had changed.

  But what?

  She started to try meditating again, blocking out the cold and the water. But as soon as she did, they both returned with full ferocity.

  Annja frowned. When my mind wandered, I seemed to be able to withstand this better. So instead of concentrating and trying to block this out, I should simply accept this and move on.

  The cold subsided.

  Annja smiled.

  She waved her arms about under the waterfall, enjoying how it felt when the heavy water surged over them. All the pain in her shoulder had vanished as well. Annja nodded, glad, but not silly enough to think that she had cured herself of a rotator cuff injury. It would still need to be looked at, but in the meantime, she could at least function with it as it was.

  So this was the lesson? That she had to accept things in her life that had the appearance of a trap and only then would it cease to be one? She frowned. Somehow she expected the lesson would be a little bit more significant than this.

  But she realized that her expectations had made it more than it was supposed to be. And like the waterfall, she should just simply accept it as it came to her and let it be what it was, with no distortions or disturbances.

  Annja smiled. That was it.

  She felt relaxed and calm. And strangely aware.

  She looked up into the waterfall, seeing the roaring white and blue of water as it frothed and tried to chomp down on her body. But Annja knew how to beat it, by accepting it, and didn’t fear the frigid waters any longer.

  She frowned.

  Something looked peculiar higher up. Splotches of darkness where there ought to have been light. The rock face behind the waterfall wasn’t flat and solid.

  But more like a honeycomb.

  A honeycomb, she wondered, that might just be a series of caves?

  She stepped off the ledge and found herself walking into Ken’s arms.

  “Hey.”

  He smiled at her. “I came to help you out of the waterfall.”

  She noticed immediately that his clothes were also gone. They stood naked together in the cold water.

  “How did you know that I was done?”

  “I knew. Let’s leave it at that.”

  Annja smiled. “You knew I’d find the answer, didn’t you?”

  “For some people, the waterfall is a test they will never be able to surmount. For other people, it is but one more test along the path. You are a warrior, Annja. I’ve told you that before. And now you know it’s true.”

  “It was amazing.”

  “What worked for you may not work for someone else. It’s important to realize that there are no paths that are perfectly identical. Beware of anyone who tells you there are. No person walks the path exactly the same way, and that’s how it should be. We are all individual and unique, as are the routes to our own enlightenment. What you’ve done tonight will bring you that much closer to becoming invulnerable.”

  Annja looked around them. The trees swayed in the breezes. She could hear crickets now that she hadn’t heard earlier. Even the moon overhead seemed more brilliant than it had prior to going into the water.

  “I almost feel like Eve in the Garden of Eden,” she said.

  Ken kissed her then, his lips closing over her own. She pressed into him, kissing him and letting her lips part as they grew bolder with each breath.

  When he pulled back, she said, “Wow.”

  He smiled. “Is that a good thing?”

  “It’s a horrible thing,” Annja said. “Come here and do it again.”

  They moved out of the water, both of them almost dry by the time they got back to their sleeping bags. Annja sank into hers, feeling the material wrap around her in warmth.

  The fire threw shadows across Ken’s skin as he stood in front of Annja. She reached out to him and he sat down next to her.

  “Kiss me again,” she told him.

  He did and Annja drew his sleeping bag over them both, nuzzled herself against the warmth of his skin, and accepted the natural progression of things with a great de
al of happiness.

  30

  Annja stretched out in the sleeping bag. They’d made slow, leisurely love under the stars and the moon while the crickets and the waterfall serenaded them. It was one of the most utterly relaxing moments in Annja’s recent life.

  She got out of the sleeping bag and slid back into her clothes. Ken did the same. While Annja certainly didn’t want the night to end, they did need sleep if they were going to find the mysterious temple where the vajra lay hidden.

  She watched Ken pull on a turtleneck sweater. He had been one of the most considerate lovers she’d ever had. And more than ever before, she wanted to help him find the vajra.

  “I saw something in the waterfall,” she said.

  He slid his socks on. “What was that?”

  “I looked up into the water. I thought I saw something farther up.”

  “What?”

  “It looked like it honeycombed inward. Maybe the caves are up there. That’s what I was thinking.”

  Ken frowned. “Maybe. But you said you looked right into the water? Are you sure you’d be able to see that well considering it was dark and the rush of water might have distorted your vision?”

  “Well, I saw it and then I felt a pull toward it.”

  “Okay,” Ken said. “We can check it out in the morning. But right now I think we should get some sleep.”

  “It’s been a long day,” Annja said.

  “Yes.” Ken pulled his sleeping bag over toward Annja. “And a hard day, too.”

  Annja grinned again. “Well, the night was the hard part.” She turned over and closed her eyes, feeling safe and secure in the small glen by the waterfall. She deepened her breathing and soon enough drifted off into sleep.

  WHEN THE YOWL BROKE across the glen, it sounded like a banshee screeching mixed with the cries of a wounded animal.

  Annja sat bolt upright.

  Ken was already out of his sleeping bag with his pistol in hand.

  “What was that noise?” she asked.

  Ken shook his head. “I don’t know.”