Messy Perfect Love

by Claire Kingsley

  “Woah, Clover,” I say aloud. My panties are getting wet just thinking about him. “It’s still morning. Let’s pace ourselves.”

  I sit down with my coffee and read my horoscope. Nothing particularly earth-shattering, just something about being open to helping people. It doesn’t really speak to me.

  I hesitate, knowing what else I need to do. I should look for an apartment. In fact, I should call about the ones I already found. I can’t very well keep staying here, even if the thought of leaving is pretty depressing.

  I feel so comfortable here, like it’s the most natural thing in the world for me to live with a man I met a week ago. That’s a little bit crazy, even for me. I’m all for spontaneity and seeing where fate takes me. But whether or not Cody and I are sleeping together, I can’t just shack up with him. I’ve never lived with a boyfriend before. In fact, it’s been years since I’ve even had a roommate.

  I sigh, trying to push away the sad feeling that blooms in my belly. I’ll find something close, and we can still see each other.

  After doing another quick search for rentals, I write down the most promising leads. I make a few calls. One is already rented, and another has several applications, but I’m welcome to turn one in. I decide to pass. My application isn’t going to come out ahead of several others, that’s for sure. What I need is the chance to meet the owner in person, before they have a bunch of other applicants.

  I’ll be honest with them—there isn’t any point in hiding what they’ll find if they do a credit check—but I can explain my situation and hopefully convince them to take a chance on me. I’ve done it before. I’m not always great about paying my bills, but I do have a good rental history—although it kind of meanders around the country.

  But I really like Jetty Beach. It feels different, somehow, and not just because I landed in the bed of the hottest man I’ve ever met. The fresh ocean air, the buzz of visitors walking down the sidewalks, the ambiance. It speaks to me. The universe definitely led me here. Why still remains to be seen.

  I mean, there’s Cody, of course—I’m sure I was destined to meet him. But maybe it’s also this town. Is this finally a place to call home?

  I have no idea what that would be like.

  I try to ignore the deeper worry that threatens to come to the surface. I can’t think about that now. I call about the little cottage I found the day before. A woman with a pleasant voice answers and says she’ll be happy to show it to me if I want to come by in an hour. I feel that twitch, the one that means something. The timing is perfect. I can go look at the cottage before I go in to work. I tell her I’d love to, and say goodbye.

  The cottage is literally all the things—snug and cozy, with a retro kitchen and old-fashioned lace curtains in the windows. It’s furnished, which is perfect, considering I don’t own any furniture. I’ll need to fill it out with a few things, and get new bedding, but otherwise, it’s everything I could have hoped for.

  The owner is an older woman with kind eyes. I give her my very best smile and tell her all about myself, but emphasize that I need a place to finally settle down. She doesn’t seem too concerned when I admit I have some unfortunate things on my credit, and she’s excited to learn I have a job at Old Town Café. She knows the owners, and says if Natalie hired me, it speaks highly of the sort of person I am.

  I leave with assurances she’ll call me in a day or so. I turn up the music and sing along with the radio as I drive away, heading for the café. I’m still a little sad at the thought of not staying with Cody anymore, but I have a great feeling about the cottage. I can’t remember the last time I lived somewhere without shared walls. Probably when I still lived in an RV with my parents, and even then, RV parks aren’t usually quiet places. I bet the little cottage is peaceful at night.

  I pull up to a stop sign. There aren’t any other cars around. The main streets in town get downright crowded, but I’ve hardly seen any other traffic on the back roads. I press on the gas and my car sputters, then jerks forward, bouncing me in my seat. The engine makes a weird grinding noise and dies.

  Oh no.

  I turn the key and try to start it again. Nothing. I pat the steering wheel, as if I can coax my car back to life.

  “Come on, baby, don’t fail me now,” I say, turning the key again.

  The engine revs, but won’t turn over.

  I look at the clock. I’m supposed to be at the café in twenty minutes. Can I walk there fast enough? I’m not sure, but I can try. There’s no way I’m going to call Natalie and tell her I’ll be late. Talk about a horrible start to a new job.

  I get my phone, hesitating. Cody is at work, and I know he doesn’t want to be bothered during the day. And he’s already rescued me so many times, I’m beginning to lose track of all the ways I owe him.

  But I don’t know anyone else in town well enough to have their number.

  I look up at the street sign to see where I am and send Cody a text. I am so sorry to bother you, but my car died at the intersection of Anchor Street and Starfish Lane. I have to be at the café in 20, so I’m going to walk, but my car is in the middle of the road. Don’t know who else to call.

  I set the emergency lights flashing and take my purse. It feels weird to leave my car sitting there, but there isn’t much I can do if it won’t start. I certainly can’t push it out of the road, and I know nothing about cars.

  I could pop the hood and stare at it for a while, hoping for some nice person to drive by and help me, but then I’ll definitely be late for the café.

  My car will probably be towed before I can find a way to get back to it, but I guess it needs a tow anyway. Thing is, I don’t know how I’ll pay for a car repair. I sigh and close the door, locking it behind me. Jetty Beach is small enough, I can live without a car. Although the cottage I just saw won’t work. It’s too far from town. Fuck, that’s disappointing. It seemed so perfect.

  I take a deep breath and start walking toward town.

  My phone dings with Cody’s text. Stay where you are. Rescue incoming.

  God, he is so sweet. I answer. It’s okay. I think I can make it if I walk.

  I continue up the road. At least I’m wearing decent shoes. And the sun is shining, so that’s a plus. This would have been way worse in the rain.

  But I haven’t gone far when the rumble of an engine comes from behind me and tires crunch on the gravel as a truck pulls over.

  “Hey,” someone says behind me. “I hear you need a ride.”

  I turn to see Cody’s brother, Hunter, leaning out of the driver’s side window of a green Toyota pickup.

  “Hey,” I say. “Um, yeah, my car died back there.”

  “I passed it,” he says. “Come on, get in.”

  I climb in the passenger’s seat. “Thank you so much. How did you get here so fast?”

  “I live close,” he says. “Cody texted and said you had car trouble, and I’m off work today.”

  I stare at him, not sure what to say. Cody texts him saying the perfect stranger who walked out on his family dinner after breaking a plate and spilling chicken all over herself needs help and this guy just … gets in his truck and picks her up?

  “Oh, and don’t worry about your car,” he says. He pulls back onto the street and heads toward town. “Ryan’s on his way. Between the two of us, I figure we’ll get it started and at least take it back to Cody’s place for you. Can I have the keys?”

  Wordlessly, I hand him my keys.

  “Perfect,” he says. “Car troubles are the worst, aren’t they?”

  His other brother is coming, too? For me?

  “You’ll probably still need to take it in to an actual mechanic,” Hunter continues. “I know enough to hopefully get it running, but you’ll want a pro to take a look so you don’t have this problem again. I know a guy in town. He’s a good guy—won’t screw you over or anything.”

  A lump rises in my throat. I want to thank him again—not like I can ever thank him enough—but I can’t get
a word out. I don’t want to cry.

  Hunter’s phone saves me the trouble. “Hi, Mom. Yeah, I picked her up. Oh, she’s fine. No, she has to go to work. I’m not sure about after, but I’ll ask her. Pie sounds great, you don’t have to tell me twice.”

  He pauses and is silent for a moment.

  I glance at him from the corner of my eye.

  He takes a deep breath, and his brow furrows. “No, I haven’t,” he says. “Look, Mom, I don’t really want to talk about that right now. Okay. Love you, too. Yes, I will text you when I drop her off so you know she got to work safe, even though that’s going to be in like ninety seconds. Okay, Mom. Bye.”

  I swallow hard and find my voice. “Did your mom just call about me?”

  “Yeah, word travels fast with the Jacobsens,” he says with a chuckle. “Cody texted me, because he knew I was close, and I gave Ryan a call, since I figured I could use help with your car. Who knows how Mom found out. She probably called Ryan and he told her. Oh, and she invited you over for pie tonight.”

  “Pie?” I say, my voice weak.

  “Yeah, she makes the best pie you’ll ever eat,” Hunter says. He pauses, glancing at me. “Don’t feel obligated though. She’ll understand if you can’t come. You’ve had a stressful day already.”

  I stare out the window as he drives into town. I make friends wherever I go, but I’m never very close to any of them. I don’t even have many contacts in my phone. I see people when I see them, like Mrs. Berryshire when she would sit outside her front door. But that’s it. I date when I meet someone I’m attracted to, and I’m usually friendly with the people I work with. Outside of that, I take care of myself. That isn’t always easy, but it’s the only way I know how to live.

  This entire family stopped what they were doing to help me and I can’t fathom why. As far as they know, I’m just a charity case Cody picked up. No one knows what happened between Cody and me last night. At least, I don’t think they know. I’m no one to them—just some random girl.

  Hunter pulls into a parking spot down the street from the café. “What time do you get off work?”

  “Um,” I say, fumbling. “I’m not sure. I don’t officially start until tomorrow, so I’m just here to fill out paperwork and stuff.”

  “Okay,” he says. He grabs his phone and types out a text. “I’ll just let Ryan know to meet me here, then. I’ll come in and get some coffee and a sandwich or something. I’m hungry anyway. If you’ll be longer than, say, an hour, Ryan and I can go check out your car. But if you won’t be long, we’ll just wait here.”

  My chest constricts and the lump in my throat rises again. My phone dings with a text from Cody.

  Hey sunshine, did Hunter find you?

  I reply. Yes. We’re at the café. About to go in.

  Good. I was worried. I can’t leave here until later, but we’ll make sure you have a ride home. I’ll see you tonight.

  I bite the inside of my cheek to keep tears from welling up in my eyes. I have to pull myself together before I go in.

  Hunter smiles at me. “Okay, we’re all set. Let’s go get you started at your new job.” His voice is downright cheerful.

  I take a shaky breath, pushing down my swelling emotions. “Thank you so much for all of this.”

  He shrugs. “Sure, it’s no problem. We’ll get you all taken care of. Don’t worry.”

  I am worried. Not about my car, or my new job. I’m worried about the feeling in the pit of my stomach. I’m so grateful to Cody and his family, but it scares me. I don’t know how I’ll ever repay these people. I don’t know how to thank them.

  I don’t want to screw this up.

  18

  Clover

  My orientation at work goes well. Natalie is just as pleasant as she was the first time we met. The café is pretty standard. I’m not supposed to be working, officially, but I jump in and make coffee when a line forms at the front counter. Hunter has lunch while he waits for me, and Ryan joins him.

  Natalie shows me around and introduces me to Harold, one of the cooks. I fill out the employment forms, then she sends me on my way with my schedule for the coming week. It isn’t quite full-time hours, but she says she’ll be able to work me up to it. She has me working early mornings, which suits me well. I like being done with my workday in the early afternoon, so I have my evenings to myself.

  Hunter drops me off at Cody’s, insisting he and Ryan will handle my car. I hate the idea of them spending their free time dealing with my problem, but they’re so easygoing about it—and they don’t listen to my arguments, taking me to Cody’s place despite my protests. There isn’t much I can do. A couple hours later, they pull my car into Cody’s driveway. Hunter’s face is triumphant when he tells me he fixed the problem. He won’t even let me pay for the part he bought, telling me with a wink that I can just give him my employee discount when he comes into the café.

  My plan to cook Cody dinner went down the drain, but he brings takeout and we curl up on the couch together with dinner and a movie. My head is still reeling from everything his family did for me, but he acts like it’s nothing. I’m filled with gratitude, but I hate feeling indebted to them—and to Cody.

  I have to work early the next morning, but Cody’s still worried about my car, so he gets up and drives me. Natalie shows me the opening routine. The first several hours go by in a blur as I help her prep the shop, then wait on customers when we open.

  I take a break about halfway through my shift, and check my messages. I have a voicemail about the cottage. She’s happy to rent it to me, and since it’s vacant I can move in anytime.

  I’m so relieved. I don’t want to keep depending on Cody for everything. It isn’t like me.

  Cody picks me up from work. The news bursts from my lips as soon as I sit down in his passenger’s seat.

  “I found a place to live,” I say.

  “Already?” he asks. “Wow, that’s … obviously, that’s great.”

  “I know,” I say. “It’s completely perfect. It isn’t even an apartment, it’s this cute little cottage, and it already has furniture. Even if I don’t get full-time hours at the café, I won’t have any trouble affording it.”

  Cody pulls out onto the street and turns toward his house. “Great news.”

  “Isn’t it?”

  But something about his voice tells me Cody isn’t so sure it’s great, despite having used that word twice.

  “Aw, are you going to miss me?” I ask. I mean it as a playful tease, but when he looks at me his eyes are intense.

  “Yes, I am.”

  I don’t know what to say to that, so we spend the rest of the drive back in silence.

  My car seems to be running fine, so I drive over to my new place the next day. Cody helps me bring in my stuff—it’s not like there’s a lot of it. Moving is pretty easy when you barely own anything. Cody’s mom comes by with groceries. I thank her profusely, trying to hide my bewilderment. Are these people for real?

  Cody stays for a while, but eventually says he should get home. We both have to work early the next morning. He kisses me goodbye, his mouth lingering against mine as he stands in the doorway. I think about asking him to stay, but it seems like it’s time for me to be on my own again.

  I shut the door behind him and lean against it, breathing out a long breath. This is good. My new place is adorable. It has a little kitchen at the back that’s open to the rest of the house, with a small dining table that separates it from the living room. There’s a wood fireplace—I’ve never had a fireplace in my life—and a comfortable couch next to an oversize chair. I don’t have a TV, but I can watch stuff on my laptop, and the room doesn’t have much space for anything else. Down a small hallway are two bedrooms, and a bathroom with pink tile.

  I haul the new bedding I bought down to one of the bedrooms and make the bed. When I finish, I stand back and look at my handiwork. The comforter is light gray with a white paisley pattern—a nice balance of soothing and girly. It’s a l
ovely bedroom. I’ll be very happy here.

  I take a shower and shave my legs. There’s nothing quite like new sheets against freshly shaved legs. I open the dresser, looking for a tank top to wear to bed—and the drawer is full of Cody’s t-shirts.

  Oh my god.

  He must have put them there when I was busy bringing stuff in from my car. I grab one and hold it to my nose, breathing him in. I slip it on and climb into bed.

  I lie there for a long while, unable to sleep. It’s eerily quiet. Crickets and frogs sing their evening songs outside my window, but no cars drive by. No sounds of neighbors stomping, or fighting, or having sex carry through the walls.

  It’s going to take some time to get used to this.

  After a while, I groan and turn over. I’m bored. My body is tired from working, but my mind won’t relax.

  And I miss Cody.

  God, that’s stupid. Nine days, I’ve known him. Not even two weeks. Usually my first night in a new place is filled with excitement, but I’m not awake because I’m thrilled with my new digs. I’ve only had a taste of Cody, and I want more. My body wants more.

  I think about his strong chest, his muscular arms, those ridiculous abs, his adorable dimples. The way he takes what he wants, tells me what to do. My hand slides down my belly, beneath my panties, and I press my fingers against my clit. I let my eyes flutter closed as I swirl my fingers around and imagine Cody’s swollen cock, plunging in, stretching me. He feels so good. I haven’t slept with every guy I’ve dated, but I’ve been with my share, and no one has ever filled me the way Cody does.

  I pull my hand away, frustrated. Buttering my own muffin is not going to cut it tonight. I’m keyed up, but I don’t just need a quick release. I need Cody.

  I glance at the clock on my phone, wondering if he’s still awake. It’s just before eleven, but we both have to get up early. I definitely shouldn’t wake him. It would be silly to get up.