The #1 Bestsellers Collection 2011

by Catherine Mann

  She frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “Closer,” he murmured, tugging her chin toward him. “I want your lips against mine. I want my body against yours. I want to be inside you.”

  Oh my.

  “Yes.” She wanted that, too.

  Very much.

  He cupped her face and silenced her with a kiss, and she realized that sex was his way of showing her comfort. Her heart swelled with the depth of her feelings for him.

  He turned off the lamps, leaving the room bathed in shimmering light from the swimming pool outside. It gave a dreamlike quality to their togetherness as he lowered her to the thick living room rug and made slow, tender love to her.

  It was so exquisite … so sweet … she cried afterward and he held her close. She’d never allowed another adult such free range of her heart before.

  It stunned her.

  He was truly a part of her now.

  And no matter what happened in the future, no one could take this away from her.

  Nine

  Lana proceeded with caution over the next two weeks, her marriage to Matt having now deepened into a firm personal relationship. Yet she had to keep reminding herself it was only temporary.

  And she fought herself constantly not to let him know that she loved him, especially when they made love every night, then slept, entwined together. It was wonderful waking up in his arms.

  They watched television together after Megan went to bed, or they sat reading books, or sometimes Matt worked beside her in the living room rather than in his study. And they spent as much time as they could with their daughter.

  As a family.

  A temporary one, she needed to keep telling herself.

  And Matt actually spent time with her checking over the accounts, and that meant more to her than anything. It signified that he fully believed she had nothing to do with the stolen money and had been set up to take the fall if something was discovered.

  And if that were the case, who had used her in such a fashion? She still suspected Evan. The man seemed to be in her office more often than not on some pretext or other. Once she’d even found him at her desk looking through some paperwork. She’d challenged him, but he’d said he was looking for a report.

  In any case, it made her burn to catch the real perpetrator, whether that was Evan or not. That person had put her very reputation on the line. He shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it.

  The night before Megan’s first birthday, Lana got up from the sofa and went over to the sideboard.

  “Matt, I have something for you,” she said, coming back with a photograph album in her hands. “I thought you might like to see some pictures of our daughter’s life so far.”

  Something emotional crossed his face.

  “You’ve never asked about her birth, but I thought you might like to know anyway,” she said, sliding onto the sofa next to him.

  He swallowed hard. “I didn’t ask before because it was too painful.”

  “I figured that.” She handed him the album.

  He looked down, almost in slow motion, and opened the heavy cover, staring at the first item. It was a commemorative birth certificate with his name as the father.

  He darted her a look, turned the page. A picture of Megan just a few hours old stared up at them. She was still wrinkly and her eyes were shut.

  “She was beautiful,” he said huskily.

  She smiled. “Every parent thinks their child is beautiful.”

  He arched a brow. “You think I’m biased?”

  “Definitely,” she teased.

  He picked up her hand and brought it to his lips. “Then she takes after her mother.”

  She caught her breath. “No, she’s like you.”

  His lips twitched. “Are you saying I’m gorgeous?”

  He was.

  She flushed and drew his attention back to the album. If she told him the truth, would she give herself away? Would he see that she loved him?

  “Look at that mop of black hair on her,” he said, interrupting her thoughts.

  “She’s a Valente. What do you expect?”

  He grinned, then continued to turn the pages until he came to the one of Lana. He frowned. “You were crying?”

  “They call it the baby blues.” She didn’t say but she’d been upset because Matt hadn’t been able to share in the joy of Megan’s birth.

  He held her eyes a minute, then returned to the album. Page after page they went through together. At the end he closed the book carefully and went to hand it to her.

  She pushed it back to him. “It’s for you to keep.”

  He seemed to hold himself in check. “Thank you.”

  She cleared her throat. She couldn’t tell him she loved him, but there was something else that very much needed to be said.

  “I’m sorry, Matt.”

  “Sorry?”

  “For keeping her from you. If I’d known how much you would love her—” She broke off, unable to finish the words.

  He tenderly ran a finger down her cheek, turning her heart over. “That means more to me than you know.”

  “It does?”

  He nodded.

  “I’m glad you’re here for her first birthday, Matt.”

  “Me, too.” He leaned toward her and kissed her softly on the lips. Then without warning, he got up with the album in his hands and walked out of the room.

  Lana’s throat closed up. She’d wanted him to take her in his arms and make love to her, even as she understood why he hadn’t. He needed to be alone right now.

  If only she could feel less alone herself.

  Lana was excited about Megan’s party but tried not to let it get the better of her. She recollected only too well the last party her own parents had given her on her tenth birthday. Her father had come home drunk and caused a scene in front of her friends. And her childhood humiliation had been complete.

  Oh, she knew no one would cause a scene at Megan’s party the way her own father had done years ago. That wasn’t the Valentes’ style, and thank the Lord it wasn’t. She wouldn’t be here if it was.

  But she didn’t want to get too emotionally attached to this family when in years to come, possibly even Megan’s next birthday, she would not be invited along. It would only end in heartache for herself, despite Megan’s emotional attachment to them being a positive thing for her daughter.

  “Lana, smile,” Sasha said, holding up the camera.

  Her sister-in-law took a picture of her and Matt crouching down to help Megan unwrap one of the myriads of presents on the living room floor.

  And suddenly Lana was a part of them.

  They were all just so thrilled to have Megan in the family that she couldn’t be aloof. She tried … God knows she tried … but their joy was catching.

  She smiled, then quickly looked down at her daughter’s head, her eyes misting over, but not before she caught a gentle look in Matt’s eyes. He knew how much this meant to her.

  They continued opening the presents. Olivia and Alex’s son, Scott, was disgusted that no one had bought Megan any boy-type gifts, but their six-year-old daughter, Renee, thought the doll was great.

  “It’s bigger than Megan is,” Nick scoffed when he saw what Cesare and Isabel had given her.

  Cesare puffed up with full confidence. “It won’t be long before she grows big enough to play with it.”

  They moved into the dining room, where the party carried on. Matt had decorated it with balloons and streamers and Ruth had made a selection of party foods for everyone. There was a birthday cake shaped like a teddy bear and they all sang “Happy Birthday” while Megan sat at the head of the table in her high chair.

  For a moment Lana thought Megan might cry, but Matt waved a streamer in front of her face and that caught the little girl’s attention.

  The song finished and Isabel leaned toward Lana. “Doesn’t she look cute?”

  A soft curve touched Lana’s lips. “Yes, she—”

>   “Da-Da.”

  Lana blinked. Had she just heard right?

  “Da-Da.”

  There was a moment’s silence.

  “Did she just say Da-Da?” Alex asked.

  Lana looked at Matt, who seemed to be rooted to the floor. She’d heard, but had Matt?

  “Yeah, she did,” Nick said. “Matt, did—”

  “Oh my God,” Matt muttered, “she called me Da-Da.” A look of pride burst in his eyes, turning Lana’s heart over with love. Suddenly he whooped with joy and spun toward her. “Lana, did you hear her? She called me Da-Da.”

  Without warning, Lana was pulled into his arms. He kissed her hard and quick, before he eased away, their gazes locking and sharing the moment.

  She blinked back tears of joy. “Yes, I heard her, Matt,” she said huskily.

  Matt kissed her again, then let her go and turned to Megan, scooping her out of her high chair. “Come on, you little darling. Come to Da-Da.”

  Lana watched the two of them together. Matt unashamedly kissed his daughter’s cheek, then hugged her tight, and Lana’s love for him … for them both … filled her until she thought she might die with the depth of it.

  Everyone started to laugh and joke, but she couldn’t have smiled to save her life.

  The moment was too emotional.

  And then she became conscious of Cesare watching her from across the room, the intensity in his eyes telling her he realized she loved his son.

  She looked away. She couldn’t admit it to the older man, not even in a look. Her love for Matt was something she never wanted anyone to know.

  As if drawn by a magnet, her eyes found their way back to her father-in-law. She couldn’t help herself. He inclined his head, telling her in his own way that he was pleased about it.

  Her throat closed up and she turned and left quietly to go to the living room, needing time to gather herself together. She didn’t want anyone else reading her mind.

  Or her emotions.

  It was bad enough that Cesare had.

  Okay, take a deep breath. It was her emotions she had to get under control right now. This was her daughter’s first birthday. She needed to concentrate on that.

  It would be the first of many, she prayed.

  Many happy birthdays.

  She would make sure of that. Her daughter would know only love and happiness from her parents.

  Unlike her own childhood.

  And when Megan was old enough, Lana knew she would make sure her daughter didn’t feel any blame over her parents’ marriage. To give Megan the Valente name may have been the reason for her and Matt’s marriage, but only because they loved her enough to put her first, not because it was expected of them.

  “Lana?”

  The hint of Italian accent told her Cesare had followed her.

  She planted a smile on her face and turned to face him. “Cesare, what are you doing here? You should be back there with your family.”

  “They’re your family, too, Lana.”

  She said nothing. She wanted to believe that, but they both knew she was only here because of Megan.

  “You love my son.”

  She gasped, then looked behind him in case anyone else had followed and heard. Luckily they hadn’t.

  “I don’t know where you’d get that idea.”

  “I saw the love in your eyes, Lana.”

  She winced inwardly. “For Megan’s sake, that’s all. I’m thrilled Matt loves her so much. He’s a wonderful father.”

  “Naturally,” Cesare said, inclining his head in the Valente manner. “But it’s more than that. I’ve been married three times, cara. I know that look of love in a woman.”

  She tried to act nonchalant. “You’re wrong, Cesare.”

  “I’m never wrong.”

  “Cesare, look, even if it were true, don’t get your hopes up. Matt will never fall in love with me. He doesn’t want to fall in love with any woman. He likes his freedom too much.”

  Cesare held her gaze. “You’ve asked him that, have you?”

  “He told me that before we were married.”

  “He didn’t know you then. Now he does.”

  That was true. Matt had believed her a thief at first, but now he didn’t.

  Hope rose inside her for a moment.

  Then died.

  “Cesare, it isn’t a matter of knowing me. It’s a matter of Matt knowing himself. He’s a playboy. There’s simply no possibility he would want to make this a permanent arrangement.”

  “Lana—”

  “Cesare, please don’t look for something on his part that’s not there.”

  He drew himself up. “I don’t need to look further than my naso.” He tapped his nose. “But perhaps you do, cara,” he said pointedly, then turned and left the room.

  Lana released a slow breath. Cesare was a good man. He loved his wife and family and would always be there for them. Unlike her own father …

  And then she realized something.

  Matt was like his father.

  He was a good man, too.

  He wasn’t in the least like her own father. Up until now, deep down she’d been judging Matt by her father’s standards. And that was wrong. Matt was a far, far better man than her father had ever been.

  Renewed hope filled Lana.

  Hope that she and Matt would never be like her parents.

  Hope that she and Matt might actually be able to make a go of their marriage.

  And perhaps he might even come to love her one day?

  Her heart fluttered and a feeling of warmth stayed with her for the rest of the evening. She couldn’t shake it. She didn’t want to shake it. The look in Cesare’s eyes had given her hope for a future with Matt.

  “Megan had a great time, didn’t she?” Matt murmured, coming up behind her as she stood looking over the crib once the party was over.

  She nodded. “Everyone did by the looks of them.”

  “Did you?”

  She smiled softly at him. “Oh yes.”

  “But you didn’t expect to, did you, Lana?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Did you have parties as a child?”

  She felt herself freeze up. “Sometimes.”

  “I suspect they weren’t fun.”

  “No.” Maybe one day she’d tell him about them but not yet. She didn’t want him staying with her out of pity.

  If he stayed with her at all.

  “Then this was an emotional day for you,” he murmured.

  “And you,” she said, looking back down at Megan sleeping peacefully in her crib.

  “Yes. I never thought I’d love her so much.”

  “I feel the same.”

  All at once she knew she wanted more children with Matt. Her heart expanded at the thought of carrying another baby of his, this time with him playing a major part. He’d be tender toward her for sure. She could see him in her mind’s eye, running his hands over her expanding waistline, leaning forward to kiss their baby through her protruding stomach.

  Buoyed by the warm feelings between them, she decided to test the waters. “I love being a mother. One day I’d love to have more children like Megan.”

  There was a moment of silence.

  Then, “How many?” he said in a clipped tone that should have forewarned her but didn’t.

  “Three or four. I want a big family.” She kept her eyes lowered to Megan. “Would you like to have more children, Matt?”

  Another moment crept by.

  “Eventually,” he said, a coolness to him now that was hard to miss. It filled her with dismay. This discussion was obviously not to his liking.

  He turned away, tension coming off him in waves. “I’ve got some work to do in the study.”

  Her heart broke in two as he left. It was clear he had no intention of falling in love with her or extending their marriage, or having more children with her.

  With a sense of desolation she showered and went to bed. Matt joined her sometime in the early hours and she
fully expected him to turn his back on her and go to sleep, but he pulled her into his arms and made love to her with an edge that stabbed at the pieces of her heart.

  He brought her to climax, then reached his own climax, but there was none of the usual feeling of togetherness they shared.

  One thing was apparent now.

  They might be together in bed.

  But they weren’t—and never would be—together in their hearts.

  Ten

  Matt got through Sunday by keeping to himself, and then Monday at work was slower as he kept trying to keep his mind on the balance sheets, only it wasn’t working.

  He would never have believed how much he loved his daughter, and how great it had felt to share her first words with Lana. But did she have to go and spoil it all by saying she wanted more children one day in the future?

  God, he hated the thought of another man in his daughter’s life. Bloody hell, but he couldn’t bear to think of Megan having stepsisters and stepbrothers, and calling another man “Da-Da.”

  And to think of Lana with another man …

  He felt as if he’d been stabbed in the gut thinking about her marrying another man, making love to someone else, carrying that other man’s child. Just the thought of it had him wanting to rip any man’s throat out who came near her.

  Yet she’d said it so calmly, as if it were nothing out of the ordinary. He hadn’t needed to know she was already thinking of being with another man before she’d even left him.

  “Matt?”

  He spun his leather chair away from the window. The million-dollar view of Sydney Harbour was worth nothing to him right now.

  “I’m leaving now for my three o’clock dental appointment,” Irene reminded him. “I’ll see you tomorrow. If you need anything just ask Evan.”

  “Fine. See you tomorrow.” He doubted he’d get much work done this afternoon now. All he could think about was going home and seeing Megan and Lana, who was at home on her day off.

  He missed them, dammit.

  Maybe he should go home early?

  He sighed and straightened in his chair. No, he’d better stay here and finish up this lot of accounts. They needed reviewing by tomorrow.

  Half an hour later, Matt was sitting up much straighter in his chair. “Christ!”