Brides of Idaho

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Brides of Idaho Page 44

by Ford, Linda;


  Conversation was easy as they discussed the events of the week. As soon as the dishes were done, Austin showed his photographs. Mandy took extra care examining the pictures with people in them.

  Joanna and Glory exchanged glances. Joanna tried to signal her not to mention it.

  But Glory only rolled her eyes before turning to Mandy. “You won’t see Pa in them.”

  Mandy didn’t even look up. “How do you know?”

  “What difference would it make if you do? You going to track him down and bring him back? Maybe get him to settle here and be a real father?”

  “Oh, Glory. You’re always so angry at him.” Mandy bent over another picture. “I don’t expect him to start a home for us. None of us need it anymore.” She jerked her attention toward Joanna, her eyes wide as if she’d just realized something. “Unless Joanna wants him to make a home with her.”

  Joanna snorted. “I think I can manage on my own.”

  Mandy already had her attention back on the pictures. She picked up one and turned it toward the light from the window. “That’s him right there.”

  “Let me see.” Glory held out her hand.

  The two of them leaned over the picture. Glory sat back. “I don’t see how you can say so.”

  Mandy handed the picture to Joanna. “What do you think?” She pointed to a man bundled up in a shapeless coat, a battered hat upon his head.

  Joanna could barely make out his profile other than to see a mat of dark whiskers. “I don’t know if it’s him or not.” What difference did it make? He couldn’t undo the past. But she refrained from saying so. After all, she seemed the only one unable to shed the hurt and move on.

  She watched Rudy from beneath her lashes as he looked at the pictures. It wasn’t that she didn’t know how to love. It was more a matter of loving unwisely.

  Austin gathered up the pictures amid a flurry of thank-yous. “I’m glad you enjoyed them.”

  Trace went to the door to retrieve a parcel. He set it on the table. “I brought a game to play.” He spread out a game board. “The Mansion of Happiness.”

  Joanna chuckled. “So this is how you get there. I’ve always wondered.” Everyone laughed, and she met Rudy’s eyes. Something sweet flickered between them, as if he promised they wanted the same thing and hoped they would find it.

  She looked away and shook her head. How silly to think they’d find what they wanted by playing a game.

  A spinner indicated how many moves they should make. If one of them landed on a vice, they had to miss a turn. If they landed on a virtue, they got to move six places.

  Joanna took her turn. She landed on “passion.”

  Glory read the rules. “‘Whoever gets into a passion must be taken to the water and have a ducking to cool him.’”

  Joanna was forced to return to the beginning.

  Twice more the same thing happened. “I think someone is trying to tell me something,” she complained. “I guess it’s folly for me to allow deep feelings.”

  Mandy reached across the table and squeezed her hands. “I think it surely refers to passions that run so high we are tempted to do immoral things.”

  Joanna nodded, afraid she’d revealed too much. This game made her feel like she was being warned against love.

  It was again her turn. “I’m going to get out of the water for good this time.” She flicked the spinner, and everyone groaned. The same number. The same destination. She didn’t even bother counting it out.

  “There’s something wrong with this game,” Levi said.

  Everyone turned to him, demanding an explanation.

  “‘Love.’ You should land there and go directly to the Mansion of Happiness.” He pulled Glory close and kissed her forehead.

  Joanna groaned. “So you’re saying if you fall in love you’re there, but the rest of us have to work for it?”

  “In your case, I think you need to avoid passion all together.”

  She laughed along with the rest of them, but it wasn’t funny. Was she destined to live a life without love?

  Chapter 14

  Her birthday isn’t until April.” Freddy’s voice was heavy with disappointment.

  Rudy rubbed the boy’s head. “Then we’ll find some other special reason.”

  “What? It’s too early for Christmas. What else is there?”

  The tarp had been taken down. They were repairing the outside of the wall now and would soon be finished, which gave him an idea. “We could have a celebration when the wall is finished. That would be a special occasion, wouldn’t it?”

  “Oh yes.” The boy jumped around. “I can hardly wait.”

  “Slow down. We want to do a good job.” Plus, he wanted a reason to stay.

  The game on Sunday had set him to thinking. Or rather, Levi’s words had. Was love the way to happiness? Even if it was, how did one know it was real? Or that it could be trusted? He fought an internal war day after day, wanting on one hand to simply believe in the power of love—his love for Joanna—but fearing on the other hand that she didn’t return his feelings.

  If he revealed his love and she said she didn’t love him, he would lose all hope. He wasn’t sure he could survive such a disaster.

  He purposely shifted his mind to other things. Freddy had come up with a nice gift for Joanna. Rudy would have to do the same if they meant to have a celebration, and seeing the pictures Austin had taken gave him an idea. He would go find Austin and discuss it with him.

  Austin was most agreeable.

  The next few days, Rudy worked steadily on the repairs. Although the days grew shorter and the nights colder, he knew he could finish before winter set in. As he hammered he continued to think of the “Mansion of Happiness.” Perhaps happiness was a journey of many steps as the board game suggested, rather than one step away, as Levi said. Maybe he could slowly reveal his love for Joanna. One step at a time. It felt doable. Less risk. At any point he could pull back and protect his heart.

  This celebration and his gift to her would be the first step.

  Four days later, he was done.

  “Can we celebrate tonight?” Freddy asked.

  “Do you want to say something to Joanna about it?”

  Freddy shook his head hard. “No. I want it to be a surprise.”

  “Okay. Then tonight after supper. Does that work?”

  “Yup. Can I have some paper to wrap my present in?”

  “I have to go to the store. I’ll bring some back. Now help me put away all the tools; then you can sweep up while I take care of a few errands.”

  He helped Freddy for a few minutes then headed for the business district of Bonners Ferry, stopping at the store first. Then at Austin’s.

  “It’s perfect,” Rudy said. He’d come by Austin’s studio several times to work on the finished product. Now he wrapped his surprise in brown store paper. “I’ll give it to her tonight.”

  Austin grinned. “I’ll take Cora out for a walk so you can be alone.”

  Freddy would be there, but Rudy would be as alone as he needed to be. This was only the first step.

  He secreted his gift in his room while Joanna worked in the kitchen. He found Freddy and helped him wrap the fur and tie the parcel shut. Freddy hurried inside and stowed it in the bedroom. Since Freddy’s accident, the two of them had stayed there every night.

  That evening, he and Freddy washed up extra well and put on clean shirts for supper. Four guests had come to the stopping house for supper, so if Joanna wondered at their attire, she didn’t comment.

  After supper, he and Freddy helped with dishes. He pushed the table back and prepared the room for the guests and any others who might show up.

  Austin dropped by to take Cora out and winked at Rudy in passing.

  Suddenly Rudy wondered if he was doing the right thing. Too much, too soon? But he’d promised Freddy, who looked about ready to explode with anticipation.

  Joanna let the guests in early because of the cold. They settled down gra
tefully in the dining room. Then she, Rudy, and Freddy retired to the kitchen.

  Alone. Finally.

  “The wall is repaired,” Rudy noted.

  “Just in time for winter.” She smiled her approval. “Thanks.”

  “It’s good and solid. I thought I might hang your washtubs inside for the winter.” Washtubs? Why was he talking about washtubs? This wasn’t what he’d planned. He knew Freddy wasn’t impressed.

  Rudy tried again. “We thought we should have a little party to celebrate the finished repairs.”

  Joanna’s eyes sparkled. “What a good idea. I’ll make hot chocolate, and we’ll eat the rest of the cake.”

  Freddy’s eyes gleamed. Rudy guessed he looked equally pleased. He lifted an eyebrow to ask Freddy if now was the time for presents.

  Freddy shook his head. Apparently there was a right and a wrong way to do these things. Who knew?

  “Business will likely be much slower now,” Joanna said as they enjoyed the hot drink and thick slices of chocolate cake.

  Rudy got the feeling she couldn’t think of anything else to say.

  Freddy finished his cake and nudged Rudy under the table.

  “Now?”

  Freddy nodded.

  Rudy pushed to his feet. “Excuse us a moment. We’ll be right back.” They hurried to the bedroom, picked up their packages, then returned to the kitchen.

  Freddy went to her. “This is for you. It’s a present.”

  Joanna paused, her forkful of cake in midair. “A present? What for?”

  “Because we couldn’t wait for your birthday,” Freddy explained.

  Joanna lifted a puzzled gaze to Rudy.

  He wanted to say, “Because we love you.” But his tongue wouldn’t let him. He cleared his throat. “We just wanted to say how much we’ve appreciated your kindness.”

  There. That was the first step.

  She studied him a moment longer, searching his gaze.

  One step at a time, he cautioned, as words of love filled his heart. He shuffled forward enough to put his gift on the corner of the table.

  She turned her attention to the package Freddy had handed her and carefully untied the strings and folded back the paper. “Ohh.” She lifted the fur and pressed it to her cheek.

  Rudy swallowed hard at the look of pleasure in her face.

  “This is lovely, Freddy. Thank you.”

  Freddy practically turned inside out. “You can make a pillow or a muff.”

  “I certainly shall.” She hugged Freddy and planted a kiss on his forehead.

  The boy’s smile could light a room.

  Rudy dropped to the chair across the table. Of course she wouldn’t hug him and kiss him. He shouldn’t expect it. He shoved his parcel closer.

  Smiling, she untied the strings, folded back the paper, and stared.

  He tried to explain why he’d chosen this, but his mouth was so dry his tongue felt wooden.

  She lifted it. “A picture of you and Freddy on horseback. It’s beautiful.”

  “The stopping house behind us.” He had insisted on it. He’d even made a frame so she could hang it. Suddenly it seemed crude. “Austin took the picture.” At least she couldn’t fault the photographer.

  She held it at arm’s length while Freddy peered over her shoulder. “It’s absolutely perfect. Thank you.”

  Was it his imagination that her eyes seemed awash?

  “I didn’t know we were having a party with gifts, but I do have something for you.” She set the picture on the table next to the fur and stepped out of the room.

  Rudy stared at the gifts. Why had he thought this was a good idea?

  Joanna returned. “I didn’t have time to wrap them, but I made you these.” She handed them each a pair of gray knitted mittens. “You’ll need them once winter comes.”

  Freddy put on his and grinned. “Thank you. I really, really like them.”

  “Me, too,” Rudy said, wondering if his voice sounded as thick as it felt. The mittens were nothing special. Made of heavy wool. Practical. But no one had ever made something especially for him. Did it mean she cared more than just friendship? Or was she just doing for them as she did for everyone—her sisters and the guests who came every day. She seemed to like taking care of people. “When did you have time?”

  “A person can find a way if they want to.”

  The way she looked at him he wondered if she meant the mittens or something else.

  Freddy yawned. “Guess I’ll go to bed.”

  Rudy should go, too, but he couldn’t make his feet move.

  Joanna didn’t speak until the door closed behind Freddy. “I can’t believe you both did this.” She ran her finger across the picture then smoothed the fur. “How did Freddy get the rabbit fur?”

  “He ran into a man at the ferry selling furs.”

  “Selling?”

  “I had the same thought. He traded his knife for it.”

  She gasped. “His knife. He loved that knife. Why would he do that?”

  “He wanted you to know how much he cares for you.” Would she realize his gift carried the same message?

  “I’ll cherish them both.” Her voice seemed a little shaky. He wondered if she could feel his love.

  She studied the picture again, tracing the frame with her finger. “The footloose cowboy and his nephew.”

  “Maybe not so footloose anymore.” Maybe he’d found a reason to stay. “Joanna.” He tried to think how to say he cared without blurting out words that would likely scare her into retreat. “You’re a special woman.”

  She chuckled. “I’m not going to ask you to elaborate.”

  Good thing she didn’t, but his brain did so anyway. She knew how to touch a person to make him feel valued. She made a person feel happy inside. “For one thing, you make the best pies.”

  “You sound like Freddy.” Her smile seemed a little strained. She didn’t look at him.

  Maybe she didn’t like thinking the only thing he appreciated was her cooking. “Course that’s only one little thing.”

  She tilted her head.

  He must stop there. “I suppose it’s time for bed.” He rose and swung from the chair while she got up and stepped away from the table. They arrived at the same spot in the kitchen at the same time and stopped inches from each other.

  He couldn’t stop himself from drowning in her gaze. I love you. Could she see it in his eyes, his expression? It was too soon to tell her. He must stick to his plan.

  “It was a lovely evening. Thank you again for the picture.” She stood on tiptoe and planted a kiss on his jaw.

  The touch of her lips was like being struck by lightning. The kiss jolted through his veins and sent a blast of overheated air through his brain, practically frying it. The heat seared his tongue. He caught her arms, aching to kiss her. Not yet. It was too soon. He’d gone too far, too fast, last time, when Freddy was lost. They’d been awkward and ill at ease for days afterward.

  He dropped his arms to his side and backed away. “Glad you like it. Thanks for the mittens.” He fled from the room and lay fully clothed on the bed, waiting for his heartbeat to slow to a gallop.

  It would be hours before his mind settled enough for him to fall asleep.

  How was he going to measure out his journey to love—the Mansion of Happiness—one step at a time? But he would. He knew he could never take the fast route Levi talked about.

  Because he was too uncertain. Too afraid.

  He was a coward, but better a live coward than a dead hero. He didn’t mean his body but his heart.

  No, he’d take his time. Step two would be to suggest a partnership in running the stopping house.

  Joanna stared after him. With a deep sigh she returned to the table to study the gifts. The picture of Rudy and Freddy was wonderful. She traced her finger over Rudy’s face. Was this his way of saying good-bye? She stroked the silky fur Freddy had given her, her heart wooden within her chest. Were they about to move on?

&
nbsp; But what had Rudy meant about not being so footloose anymore? He’d explained that Freddy meant his gift to say how much he cared.

  Did Rudy’s gift carry the same message?

  A slow smile engulfed her face. Did he care about her but was afraid to say the words? She would let herself think so.

  Tomorrow she would hang the picture on the new wall, where she could see it while she worked.

  And she’d let herself dream that more was possible. That the footloose cowboy was considering hanging up his spurs.

  She watched Rudy closely the next few days. He and Freddy chopped wood and then disappeared into the toolshed. She’d glanced in a few days ago and saw they were making a cart.

  He’d said nothing about his feelings, but on the other hand, he’d not saddled his horse and ridden away.

  She took that as a good sign.

  Supper was almost ready. A trickle of men continued to pass through. Men determined to get in on the gold rush. She set the table and opened the door to welcome the guests.

  Three filed by and dropped in their coins.

  A fourth stopped in front of her. She glanced up to see what the man wanted and gasped. “Pa.”

  “Yup. Your old pappy’s back.” He nodded as if it was the best news in the world.

  “Hi, Pa. No need for you to pay. You’re my father.” She waved him in.

  Rudy heard her, and his gaze drifted from Pa back to her, watchful.

  She smiled. Rudy looked about ready to tell Pa it was time to start acting like a father. She lifted one shoulder. She’d long since given up expecting anything fatherly from him.

  As she took care of her guests, she studied Pa. A big man with a hearty laugh. Black whiskers with a touch of gray along the edges. He was no longer a young man. It kind of surprised her to realize it.

  The others finished and left the room. Pa lingered.

  “You stay and visit.” Rudy carried away the dishes to the kitchen, and he and Freddy started washing them.

  “Jo, girl, I done got your letter saying your sisters got married. I take it they live nearby.”

  Funny how he seemed to get a letter from her, but they never got one from him. “They do.” She told him about Glory and Levi’s mission and the log house Trace and Mandy had built.

 

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