The hell he will. I grab the picture frame, saunter down the hallway to the front door, open it and fling the past out the door. God that felt good.
I fire off another text of my own.
Pam: There’s nothing to say. Your actions said plenty. Don’t bother coming home. Stay away from me. Maybe Danika has room for you in her bed.
I hit send and power down my phone. I need to cleanse myself of that man.
He’s all around me. I can smell him. Leather, tobacco, and a hint of spice.
Not even here but he surrounds me.
I feel caged in. Like I can’t breathe.
Tears flood my cheeks as I gather his things.
My chest shudders on a sob.
Love doesn’t live here anymore and neither does he.
Chapter Three
Pam hasn’t answered any of my text or calls since the last one I got from her telling me to stay away. I drove all damn night to come home to her and our son. I know I fucked up. I’m going to fix this. I won’t lose her or my son over one dumbass mistake. I sigh in relief when I hit our road and see her SUV. She’s never been a runner but right now I don’t know what she will do.
Fuckin’ beat. All I want is to hug my boy and kiss my crazy ass woman. I roll up to the house, as I pull into the carport, I see the neighbor’s black lab running past me with what appears to be one of my boots hanging from his mouth. What the fuck. I park my bike and take my helmet off, hanging it off the handlebars of my chopper. I go around to the front yard and that’s where I find all my clothes strung about wet, reeking of dog piss and my favorite fuckin’ tee from a trip Pam and I took down to Florida has a pile of dog shit right on the chest covering the logo from a bar we stopped at.
That’s fitting, I guess. My life is going to shit. My marriage. Going to hell in a handbasket.
I scrub a palm over my face feeling the grime of the road. Fuck. I stare toward the house and see my wife smirking at me with Connor on her hip from the doorway. My boy smiles big at me. She holds his hand up giving me a wave while whispering in his ear. Bitch has lost her god damned mind. I strut up the walkway popping my knuckles and she shakes her head at me.
“Open the door, Pam.”
“I told you. Stay away from me. There’s nothing here for you.”
“I been on the road. I’m tired. Fuckin’ starving for your good cookin’. I need a shower and to see my son.”
“You can do those things somewhere else. I’ll have my lawyer contact you to let you know about visitations. But as you can see, Connor’s fine.”
“Lawyer. The fuck?”
“I’ll be filing for a legal separation, Brant.” She never calls me Brant unless she’s super pissed.
Connor leans forward touching the glass of the door and mumbling, “da-da.”
“We need to talk about this.” I clench my fists.
“We will when our lawyers are ready to sit down.”
“Not gonna be no damn lawyers. You’re my wife. Now open the fucking door so I can see my kid.”
“That’s not happening. You need to go.”
“I swear to fuck you better open that door.” I smack my palm on the side of the house, and she flinches.
“You’re scaring my son.”
My nostrils flare. “You mean our son.”
“Whatever. I need you to leave.”
“Yeah. It’s always about what you need. It’s Pam’s world and I get to breathe in it.” I pull my phone out and dial my sister. Zoe. “Hey. Need you to take Connor for a few days.”
The front door opens, and Pam rushes out, screeching, “Never mind, Zoe. You aren’t needed.”
“Don’t listen to her. Come now.” I end the call and tuck my cell back in my pocket. “Did you block my number or something?”
“No. My phone is off so you can’t harass me.”
“Jesus. You’re so full of shit, babe.”
“I’m not your babe.” She shields one of Connor’s ears with her hand while the other is pressed to her shoulder. “I’m just a bitch you used to fuck.”
She’s fucking pushing all the wrong buttons. I swear to fuck I’m going to tan her ass glowing red.
Connor reaches for me at the same time nearly jumping out of my wife’s arms. She has no choice but to let me hold him. I kiss his forehead, hug him close, and take in his clean baby powder smell. “Missed my little buddy. Daddy’s home.” I scowl at Pam over his head. Can’t fucking believe she’s pulling this shit. Before I left, she seemed cool. Too cool but still I thought we were working past our shit. I see now she was playing her part. Biding her time till I hit the road so she could pull this little stunt.
My sister only lives a few houses down. It doesn’t take her long to drive up. She already has a car seat in the back being she babysits so often. Pam shoots daggers at me with her eyes as I load him in the back passenger side. “I’ll give you a call. Got some shit to sort.”
“I see that.” Zoe quirks a brow toward the mess in the yard.
“Right. Later.” I close the door and tap the top of the car for her to pull out.
Zoe starts out the driveway and Pam runs inside locking me out the damn house again.
Fuck this. It ends now. I go around to the back door and find it locked too. Pam lost the spare once and never had another made. Then she took mine. I’m not playing this game with her. I pop the screen off the bedroom window, raise the glass, and crawl through. We always left it unlocked when Pam lost the backdoor key so I could get in. Guess she forgot. Back on my feet I march through the house toward the living room. Pam goes for her purse.
“If you won’t leave then I will.”
“Cut the shit. Not telling you again. We’re talking this out, babe.”
Even pissed off my wife is sexy as fuck. Always has been. First thing I ever noticed about her was the tattoos on her thighs. She was wearing these cut off shorts that showed off the roses and ivy snaking up her thighs like the path to the Garden of Eden and I couldn’t wait to get a taste of her forbidden fruit. Her dark hair curls around her shoulders, with streaks of white highlighted through the silky strands. Lips painted a light shade of pink. Lips that belong wrapped around the head of my dick.
“We gonna fuck or fight first, Pam? It’s your call. But either way you’re gonna end up naked with me buried so damn deep inside you, babe.”
“We’re over.”
“We’re not over unless I say so and I didn’t say.” I grab her by the throat, wrapping my thick fingers around the slender column, pushing her up against the wall. “Told you the fuckin’ truth. Coulda lied and said I was out of my mind. Think the prospect fuckin’ drugged me. I don’t know what was going through my mind. I was buzzed. Pissed off. One minute I was drinking and smoking a blunt. Next thing I remember is a whore between my legs and my wife sayin’ she was done with me. I can’t tell you why I did it. I got everything I want right here. Bad ass bitch that you are I know you know it. Deep down you’re mine. Always been mine.”
“Let me go, Link.”
“Never,” I vow.
“There’s nothing between us anymore. Once upon a time there was nothing I wanted more than being your old lady, but now...”
“Fuckin’ liar. There’s one thing you wanted more than anything. More than me. A baby. Carved up slivers of my soul trying to give you that no matter what it took from me. The one thing my woman wanted I couldn’t give her. Even watched my best friend fuck you to try and give you that. You know what that does to a man? You have any idea?”
She pales, saying my name on a whisper, “Link.”
I shake my head. “Nah. You don’t have a clue how much that shit ate at me. Walking around while everyone thought I was a fuckin’ chump. My Old Lady was giving my pussy up to Nickel on the side.”
Chapter Four
Link squeezes my throat harder. Hard enough I know there will be indentions of his fingerprints marring my skin tomorrow. “Fuckin’ tore me up, but I gave you that. Gave you everything
. Would do anything for you.”
“Let go,” I rasp, scratching at his arm. His grip loosens, but he keeps me pressed against the living room wall. “You don’t get to throw that in my face. It wasn’t even my idea. You make it sound like Nickel and I went behind your back. The first two times I cried the whole time and third I just wanted it over with. So yeah, it tore you up, but you ever think it didn’t hurt me too?”
IVF was too expensive. With Link’s background we’d never been able to adopt on the up and up. We didn’t have the money to do that either. One night Nickel was over. Him and Link was shooting the shit and getting high. Talking about our personal business. How I couldn’t get pregnant, and he’d give anything to give me a child. It started out as a joke between them. Nickel offering up his sperm. Only when a baby never happened the offer became real. Link and I were desperate to start a family.
Link’s dark gaze goes soft and his eyes brighten. “Hurt each other, honey. Can’t be doing that no more.”
I snort and shove at his chest, but he only leans into me.
“Not leaving until we figure this out. You’re right. Maybe I wanted to hurt you.”
“Congratulations. Job well done. Now we’re sorted.”
“Sweetness.” He strokes my jaw.
“Nothing sweet about me right now.”
“I know you’re mad at me. All I can say is sorry.”
“Sorry can’t fix what’s broken between us. My trust. You took it and lit it on fire.”
“Tell me what you want.”
“I don’t know,” I answer him honestly because I don’t. I’m pissed off. I close my eyes and that damn image of him all smug in that chair with her between his thighs pierces my heart.
His lips touch my mouth and I roll mine inward. “Gonna deny me?”
“Sure, you had all the pussy you could get on the road. I don’t want to taste them on you.”
“I’m gonna give you that one hit because I fucked up. Know I gotta earn you back and I will. Whatever it takes. There’s no one else in this world I want but you. Know you don’t want to hear it, but honest to God, babe, I was thinking about you.”
I open my eyes and it rips me in fucking two the way he’s staring at me all vulnerable like he is truly sorry, but I can’t pretend what happened didn’t happen. That’s not who I am. I won’t be his fool.
Thinking of me the whole time. Yeah right. I bet he was.
“I don’t want you to do anything but leave.” I swallow hard, hating the words as I as I say them while knowing I have to. If he did it once he’ll do it again. What’s that saying? Once a cheater always a cheater. Not all men are like Murder. Yeah, he cheated on Ruthie with Alexa, but he’d never step out on Lex. The love they share is rare. Not everyone gets that all consuming love. I thought Link and I had that. I was wrong.
“You don’t mean that.”
I suck in a breath. My chest aches with both emotional and physical pain like I’ve never felt before because I have to cut him loose. If I don’t do it now I never will. My heart thunders against my ribs. Sweat trickles down my spine in clammy beads. Ringing sounds in my ears as I close my eyes. If I stare into his eyes, I will never get these words out. “I love you, honey. Have since the day we met. You made all my dreams come true. Showed me a love I never thought possible.” I bite back my tears and kiss my husband soft and sweet. My lips meet his with the sweetest sorrow burning through my veins because I love him so much it hurts deeper than I ever imagined walking away. To let him go. To give up on us.
His hands move down my sides, and he jerks me into his hard muscled body by the belt loops on my jeans.
“Love you too.”
I shake my head and shove his chest, forcing him to take a step back. “Stop lying to me. You don’t love me.” I push him back another step. “This isn’t love, babe. You don’t destroy the person you love.”
“Haven’t lied to you. Owned my shit. Told you what happened. I didn’t even get off.”
Didn’t even get off. Of course that’s all a man thinks with and about. Your dick is what’s important here. Not that you hurt me.”
“You can’t deny it. You love me.”
“Now I hate you.” I yell in his face. Before I even know I’m doing it my hand flies back then whips across his face with a deafening crack that stings my skin and leaves a welt on the visible part of his cheek.
His arms close around me. “You big and bad and gonna put your hands on me,” he growls. I bump my chest against his as he cages me in. That familiar scent of spice, tobacco, leather, and the road wraps around me, smothering me.
I scowl at him as he dips his head down and comes in for a kiss. I bite his bottom lip hard enough to draw blood, the metallic taste coating my teeth.
A hiss escapes his mouth. “You want it rough, babe. I’ll give it to you rough.” He yanks on my hair, forcing my head up. Our heated gazes lock. His stormy eyes holding me hostage. “Fuck you so hard you won’t be able to think of anything but me between them legs.”
“I’ll never fuck you again,” I seethe, trying to break free of him, but warmth pools in the lower region of my belly. My pussy pulses. A tingle working through me as I spout my lie. I don’t want to be attracted to him, but I can’t deny that my body reacts to his strong touch and the roughness of his low and rumbly voice that grates over me like velvet rubbing sandpaper.
“Now who is the liar?” Not giving me an opportunity to respond, his mouth crashes down to mine hard. Link kisses me like a savage. Hot, deep, and wet with a dominating force I can’t refute even though everything in me is screaming no. I’m dying inside and yet my body craves him. The violent nature of the control he’s exuding over me in this moment. He backs me into the wall again and jerks my jeans down then grabs a handful of my ass. I pull his cut down his arms, and he tosses it to a nearby chair. We’re a flurry of teeth, tongues, and fingers. Groping, nipping, and sucking. Attacking one another like animals rutting in the wild.
“Fuckin’ soaked for me.” He runs a finger over the crotch of my panties. Heat inches up my neck, a pale blush spreading along the apples of my cheeks. “Bet I’ll slide right in but gonna eat you first.” Link drops to his knees and hitches one of my legs over his shoulder. He doesn’t bother to remove my underwear. Pulling them to the side he goes at me with his mouth on my clit and two fingers in me. Teasing at my ass with his thumb, Link is eager to please. His beard scrapes against my skin and will probably chafe me but I don’t care.
My ears ring louder as the back of my head hits the wall knocking a picture frame to the floor. The glass doesn’t break and neither of us miss a beat. I yank on his hair wanting more. Needing him in ways I’ve never needed him before. Wanting him to prove his devotion any way he can but in the back of my mind I know this ain’t love.
It’s primal.
Raw.
Dirty.
Wrong.
I want it anyway.
I want him.
I want his love.
His touch.
His false promises.
An orgasm.
He owes me this much.
Fingers digging in my hip so hard and rough, I know he will leave a mark. A reminder that once upon a time he was wild for me. Proof my husband desired me over all else. I scratch at his back as mine thumps against the wall wishing someone could save me from myself.
It’s a mistake.
Bad for my health.
But right now he’s the only thing that can soothe this ache in my soul because I’m so damn broken. I seek out the connection that only we share.
I’m damaged and desperate for something to hold onto.
“Fuck, sweetness. You taste like mine. Always mine,” he murmurs against my pussy.
My hips buck.
More tears sting the backs of my eyes.
Hating myself for needing this.
For needing him.
I’m hopeless.
A lost cause.
“Don’t ruin thi
s with talking,” I warn. “Don’t waste your breath with more empty promises.”
I feel his lips spreading into a grin against my silken skin. “Got a wicked tongue but the sweetest taste. My Pam.”
He’s wrong.
I’m not his anything.
Not any longer.
I belong to no man.
Chapter Five
Pam sinks down on my cock, grinding and rolling her hips creating a sensual rhythm. My woman knows how to ride. Eyes rolled back in her head, mouth parted, touching herself. Plucking and teasing the hardened points of her dusty rose nipples. She’s goddamned beautiful. Prettiest thing I’ve ever seen. The way she lets go for me. She puts on one hell of a show. This is what we’ve been missing. A physical connection.
I love the way she comes alive when our bodies come together. Nothing turns me on more than her slick and sweet pussy that molds perfectly snug to my cock. Fucking made for taking my dick. Pam loves me. She can pretend to hate me, but we both know she wants me. That she will never belong to anyone but me.
Two orgasms, and she still hasn’t had her fill. Flexing her hips, she moves against me with a shudder. Her greedy pussy contracts around my cock. There’s number three.
I grip her jaw. “Eyes on mine when you come on this cock.” I thrust my hips, surging deeper in. I’m barely hanging on here. Been ready to come since I got inside her. It’s been too damn long. Pam gives me her eyes. “Just what I needed.” I strum her clit, playing her body like my favorite song. A symphony of her heated moans. Her lust singing to me as she cries out on a low whimper. Confessing her love of me and my cock.
She continues to grind, rolling her hips, hitting all her favorite spots.
Sweat dusts my skin. The smell of the road and sex clings to our sheets.
I’ve yet to fuck that anger out of her, but I’m working on it.
My balls tighten. I’m damn close to getting mine. I grip her hip and flex my hips, knifing up as I close my eyes on the verge of ecstasy.
The Biker's Lucky Charm (Royal Bastards MC: Charleston, WV Book 5) Page 2
