by Toni Aleo
When he goes to start the car, I stop him. “Jace.”
He looks over at me, smiling. “Yeah?”
I smile. “I love you—”
“I love you too,” he says, leaning over and kissing me softly on the lips, but before he can get away, I stop him.
“But you have to let me help here. I have money saved up. Let’s use that and get an apartment, or we can go move in with your mom.”
His face twists in disgust. “No way in hell are we moving in with my mom. And no, we are good. It’s fine. If anything, we’ll just sleep apart until something opens up.”
I nod, but I don’t want that and neither does he. “That sucks.”
“Yeah, but I’m not gonna financially fuck us, and I’m not asking for help. We got this.”
He’s right, especially when we don’t know what could come up. He’s being smart and I understand that, but I want to sleep together. I want to be a married couple.
“So don’t worry, okay?”
I nod. “Okay.”
He kisses me again and then goes to start the car as my phone goes off in my pocket. Pulling it out, I see that it’s my dad and soon I’m unable to breathe. I haven’t heard from or talked to him since I left New Jersey.
“Who is it?” Jace asks as he pulls out of the parking lot.
“My dad.”
His eyes widen and I shrug. “I wonder what he wants.”
“Don’t know. Answer it.”
Biting my bottom lip, I mutter, “Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Dad.”
“I know, Dad. I have caller ID.”
“Oh yeah,” he says slowly, letting out a long breath. “How are you?”
“Good.”
“Still married and pregnant?”
“Yup,” I say simply. “Nothing’s changed.”
He sucks in a deep breath. “Okay, well, I wanted to let you know that we will be in Nashville two weeks before Christmas. We want to meet your…” he pauses and clears his throat “…husband, and we would like to see you.”
“Why?”
“Because you are our daughter.”
I make a face because I know damn well that isn’t the reason. “Okay, but why are y’all coming into town?”
“Matty is playing the Bullies, and this was one of the games we bought flights for. We figured we could watch him and see you at the same time.”
I know that shouldn’t make me mad. I know I should be happy he wants to see me, but it pisses me the fuck off because I know I’m not the original reason they are coming to see me. I haven’t heard from anyone, not even my mom. But now they are coming into town to watch Matty and figure they might as well see the daughter they made too. Whatever. If they were really concerned about me, or even meeting Jace, they would have come weeks ago.
“I think I’ll pass.”
“Why? Won’t you be at the game?”
“Yeah, to see my husband play, and that’s it.”
“Avery, we want to see you.”
“No, you are coming ’cause of Matty, and like always, I’m an afterthought.”
“That’s not true, Avery. We wanted to see both of you at the same time.”
But I don’t believe him. Fighting back the tears, I shake my head. “Dad, if that were true, why haven’t you come sooner?”
“I’m busy. I work all the time.”
Rolling my eyes, I shake my head. “Yeah, whatever.”
“I’m not sure what that means.”
“It means if I see you, I see you. If I don’t, then I don’t.”
“You’ll see us. We want to go to dinner with you two. I’d like to get to know the boy who has married my daughter and made a child.”
I pause. “Dad, do you know his name?”
My dad pauses. “Sinclair.”
“First name.” I hear him typing and I shake my head in disbelief. “You’re googling him?”
Jace snorts from beside me as my dad says quickly, “No, Jace, his name is Jace.”
“Whatever.”
He pauses and then says softly, “Please, Avery, I want to see you.”
The sincerity in his voice leaves me breathless as I close my eyes. “Fine, I’ll talk to him and see if he wants to go.”
He chuckles. “He will. He isn’t stupid; he knows who I am.”
“Wow, okay.” I shake my head. “Very arrogant, Dad.”
“Maybe, but I want to see you.”
“Why?”
“Like I’ve said before, you’re my daughter.”
“Who you’ve cut off,” I remind him and he lets out a breath. I can’t say I was surprised when I went to use my credit card and it didn’t work. But I wonder if he would cut off Matty or Laurence if they got into a position like I did. I doubt he would have, and I really wonder what he would do if he found out Matty was gay. Not that I plan on telling him or anything, but I just wonder.
Would they get treated the same?
“You have a husband. You don’t need me.”
“You’re right. So I don’t need to see you.”
“Well, I’m asking to see you,” he says, his voice dropping an octave. “Please, Avery. Your mother is worried sick about you.”
“I bet. That phone is ringing off the hook.”
“Avery Rose, please. We want to see you. I feel you think things you shouldn’t, and I want to make them better.”
Make them better?
How do you fix eighteen years of shit?
When Jace squeezes my hand, I look over at him and he nods his head. “Just say yes,” he mouths and I shake my head, but he nods his once more.
Glaring, I say, “Okay, Dad. We will go to dinner with you.”
“Good, I’ll call you when we get in that Friday.”
“Okay.”
He pauses and he says very softly, “I love you, honey. I do, and I don’t know how that got forgotten, but I’m sorry for that.”
My heart stops as my eyes fall shut, shocked at the unexpected apology. “Dad, I never thought you didn’t love me, it’s just that you don’t care.”
“And that’s my fault. I’ll see you soon. I wish it were sooner, but the damn All-Star game is keeping me busy.”
“Yeah. Like always,” I say and I can hear the remorse in his voice.
“I’m sorry, love. I’ll be in touch.”
I don’t answer him, I just hang up and let my head drop. Squeezing my hand, Jace kisses the back of it. “That didn’t sound so bad?”
I shrug. “I just don’t know what he’s doing. Why does he care now?”
Pulling into a spot, he looks over at me. “Maybe he always has and didn’t realize he wasn’t showing it?”
“Maybe.” I think that over and I guess it could be true. He works constantly and I know his job is important, but I should be important too. Closing my eyes, I try to regulate my breathing because my heart has been pounding since I saw his number on my phone. I just don’t want to get my hopes up. I’ve wanted my dad and my mom to care about and love me for so long. I craved it. I don’t want my heart to be smashed again. When my chest starts to tighten, I suck in a deep breath and let it out, because I’ve got this. I can do this. I know the score. I just won’t go in there expecting things they aren’t capable of. No matter the sincerity in his voice, I have eighteen years of proof that I was second best to everyone.
I have to remember that.
“Let’s just take it one day at a time,” Jace says, and I look over at him. “One thing at a time. You know? Everything will work out. I know that for sure.”
Leaning over, I press my lips to his as his hands come up, tangling in my hair. Pulling back, I press my nose to his and agree. “Okay.”
“I’ll do the same. I probably need to start going to yoga or something. Do they have prenatal yoga?”
My brows pull together. “What? Why?”
“If I’m seeing that douche-fucker of a brother of yours in a little under a month’s time—which, by the way, how did I
not know we were playing him?”
“You’ve been distracted,” I supply with a grin and he nods.
“I have, but anyway, if I’m seeing him, then damn it, I need to find my happy place and not kill my new brother-in-law.”
I smile. “Good plan. The commissioner might frown on that, Sinclair.”
“I thought so too, Sinclair,” he says with a grin, kissing my lips. “Now go write some songs and be awesome.”
“Aren’t I always?”
“Of course,” he says as I get out. Before shutting the door, I bend down, meeting his gaze. “I’ll text when I’m ready.”
“Cool, see you in a bit.”
Shutting the door, I tuck my hands into my pockets and rush to the door to head up the stairs to Jelly Records. As I start to climb, my phone sounds and I pull it out to see it’s from Jace.
Confused, I open the text and smile.
Jace: I love you.
As I type back the same, I can’t help but laugh.
It’s so funny how things change in the blink of an eye.
Three months ago, I wanted to be a star.
I didn’t want any man, and I sure as hell didn’t want to trust anyone.
Now, I just want to love this guy and my baby.
Crazy.
I didn’t want to do this.
I still don’t.
But I don’t think I have any other option.
I have to take care of Avery.
Swallowing hard, I stare at my phone.
Damn it.
Maybe I should call Jude. See what he thinks. But I know what he’ll say. It’s the same thing Jayden and Lucy will say too. No, I can’t call them. They wouldn’t understand. They have good jobs; they haven’t felt the complete and utter failure I’m feeling. Plus, I know they’ll try to throw money at me, and I don’t want their money. I don’t want to owe anyone anything.
No, there is only one option.
Dialing my dad’s number, I wait for him to answer. I haven’t talked to him much in a while, and he doesn’t even know Avery is pregnant. I don’t know, I just didn’t think he needed to know, which might bite me in the ass now.
“Son, I was seriously about to call you,” he says with a laugh. “I just got the craziest email.”
I pause. “Yeah? What about?”
“Avery,” he says and I pause.
“What about her?”
“Well, I guess she’s at the studio with Stu. And he emailed me razzing me about being a grandpa again. I was confused, ’cause I didn’t know I was going to be a grandpa.”
“Wow, okay. Because that’s the reason I’m calling,” I laugh, but he doesn’t laugh with me.
“So, it’s true?”
“Yeah, she’s pregnant and we got married,” I say simply, and he draws in a sharp breath.
“Well, then.”
“Yeah,” I say, letting out a breath. “Sudden, I know. But it was just right.”
“All right, wow. I’m surprised by all of this.” He pauses and I hear him shuffling papers. “Not to sound like a dick, but you’re sure it’s yours?”
“Yeah, I know it is.”
“Being who you are, Jace, I wouldn’t put it past anyone to try to—”
“Dad, it’s mine. She wouldn’t do that anyway. She isn’t that kind of person,” I say, shutting that down.
“I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“Then don’t ever say that again, okay?”
“Okay,” he says simply. “I guess congratulations are in order?”
“Thanks.”
“You should let me take you out, celebrate.”
“Um, yeah, sure,” I say, but I have no intention of going. I just don’t want to piss him off before I ask for what I called for. “Listen, the reason I was calling was to tell you. And also to ask if there is any way you can change my trust fund from me getting it when I turn twenty-one to me getting it now.”
I wait for him to say something, but all I hear is papers moving. As seconds pass, I start to panic. This was my only plan, the only idea I had that was going to make everything easier on us. “Um, the reason is the family dorms on campus are full, and I can’t use my scholarship money on an off-campus apartment. Plus, it costs so much more. I could get more hours at the coffee shop, but I’m already so tired and shit. I really need the money, Dad, so if you could change it, that would be great.”
Sucking in a deep breath, he lets it out as I wait. God, this is demoralizing. “Listen, son, let’s talk about it over dinner, okay?”
“What?” I ask, my heart jumping into my throat. “Can’t you just say yes and do it?”
He laughs. “Yeah, but I want to talk this through. Make sure you are making the right choice.”
“I am—”
“I’m gonna have Francesca text you where dinner will be. Six okay?”
“Um…” God, I don’t want to go. “Yeah, that’s fine. Avery gets off at five thirty, so that works great.”
“Wonderful, I can hug my new daughter-in-law,” he says with a cheerful laugh, and it just doesn’t feel right. Something is off. Fuck. “So I’ll see you soon, then.”
“Okay.”
When the line goes dead, I’m pretty sure I just agreed to meet with the devil.
When Avery comes out of the building, I smile and wave as she rushes to the car. Getting in, she slams the door shut before leaning over to kiss me. “I wrote the most gorgeous song for our baby.”
“Really?” I ask, kissing her again.
“Yes, it’s called ‘Heartbeat.’”
“You’ll have to play it for me.”
“Duh. Done.” She giggles as she leans into me. “It’s gonna be the first song I sing at the showcase, I think.”
“Still only want to be a songwriter? Don’t want to try for a record deal?”
She nods. “Nope, I love songwriting. I feel good about it.”
“Awesome.” I kiss her again because I can’t help myself.
When she backs away, she eyes me. “You okay?”
I shrug. “Yeah, tired,” I lie, but it isn’t really a lie. I am dead tired, but I don’t want to worry her with shit about my dad. “Listen, my dad wants to go to dinner to celebrate.”
“You told him?”
“Stu did,” I say with a smile as I pull out. “My dad called, and I confirmed.” I shade the truth a bit.
“That jerk,” she laughs and I shrug.
“No biggie. So if you don’t want to go, I’ll take you home. If you do, then it’s about ten minutes from here.”
She watches me for a second. “I want to go if you want me to, but you seem a little distant. Are you sure you’re okay?”
I flash her a winning grin. “Yeah, for sure, and I want you to go.”
“Okay.”
Sending her one more smile, I make the turn for dinner, but I still feel her looking at me. She’s been doing that a lot lately. Probably because I’m trying to handle everything and make sure she doesn’t have to worry at all. I just don’t want her to stress. She has to grow our baby and she has enough shit to deal with. School, internship, and her family. When they completely cut her off, she was devastated. Who wouldn’t be? But as her husband, I have to hold her up, and I’m going to do just that.
She won’t feel alone on my watch.
Or stressed.
No, fucking way.
Swallowing hard, I pull on to Broadway and then down into the Gulch to Kayne Prime, one of the best steakhouses in town. Pulling up to the valet, I get out and hand the keys to the guy as Avery waits for me at the bottom of the stairs. She’s smiling, her face bright, but all I can see is the little pooch her belly is forming. It’s usually so flat since she’s a little person, but today, she looks pregnant. And while it scares the shit out of me, it only fuels me to do better by her.
Smiling back, I take her hand in mine, kissing the back of her hand as we head up the stairs to the front of the restaurant. I don’t see my dad when we walk in, but th
e hostess is ready to seat us. He got a table in the back, like he always does. My dad likes his privacy, and for as long as I can remember, we always ate in the back of restaurants. Weird, I know.
Pulling a chair out for Avery, I sit down beside her so I can see when he comes. I reach for the water the waiter just poured, downing it, and Avery’s gaze widens. “Jace?”
“Thirsty,” I reassure her with a grin, but she doesn’t believe me.
Squeezing my hand, she shakes her head. “No, what’s going on?”
“Nothing, it’s fine—”
“There is my son and beautiful daughter-in-law!” My dad’s booming voice fills the room, and I look up to see him entering. With Ellen behind him.
Fuck me.
Standing up, I hold out my hand, but he laughs, wrapping me up in a big hug before squeezing me tightly. “Shake hands? Please.”
Damn it. This isn’t right.
When he wraps Avery up, I feel Ellen looking at me as if she wants to hug me. But, nope, no can do, superwhore who broke up my family. “So pretty. Were you this pretty at the game? I don’t remember.”
Avery smiles, but she’s cautious as my dad squeezes her. “You’re too sweet.”
I smile as he lets her go and turns her so she faces Ellen. “This is my fiancée, Ellen.”
Avery doesn’t want to touch her, I can see it, but Ellen takes her hand, shaking it eagerly. “So nice to meet you.”
“You too,” she laughs nervously, looking at me, and I shoot her a reassuring smile as I pull her chair back out. Sitting down, Dad orders some cocktails for him and Ellen while Avery and I take waters.
“That’s my boy. Gotta keep it clean to tear up the ice. Ralph told me you met with the Rangers yesterday?”
I nod. “Yeah, I don’t know why. They are doing great in the standings; I won’t last till their pick.”
“True, so who are we looking at?”
“Panthers, Sabres, and Blue Jackets. I’m liking the Panthers for, you know, sunny Florida,” I say and Avery nods.
“Me too,” she giggles and my dad laughs hard. A little too hard. It’s forced.
“I bet. Good place to raise a baby. But Blue Jackets are right up the road. You’ll be close to home.”
