Don't Stop Believin'

by Olivia Newton-John

  ‘I hate that name,’ I said, laughing.

  We were having a fight over the name of a property we didn’t own! And so, it began. We started playing with the idea of owning this land and having a place where our friends and family could stay, sort of like a modern commune.

  The next week was a blur as I scattered my mother’s ashes under my beautiful Moreton Bay fig tree where I want to be scattered one day. Then I went back to America and Gregg returned to Sydney. Sometime later he called me to say he had been thinking about that property, and he wanted to know if I was interested in doing something about it.

  Yes, I was interested.

  Gregg returned to the property with a banker friend, Warwick Evans. The land had so much promise, so we put an offer in. Unfortunately, someone had put an offer in before us and it was under contract. I told a disappointed Gregg, ‘If it’s meant to be – it will come back to us.’

  A few months later, the contract fell through!

  We formed a partnership of four of us – Warwick, me, Gregg and his friend Ruth Kalnin – and put in another offer for this beautiful piece of property. I was nervous because it was unknown territory, but excited because it was a new adventure. My motto has always been: if you want it, create it.

  Gregg sold his business in Sydney and went to live on the property. Here it gets even more interesting. On his first night there, while sleeping in one of those little shacks, he dreamt the whole look of the place, then woke up and actually drew plans for what is there today.

  That’s how Gaia was born.

  We realised that we had a real responsibility with this property. This was a healing place. Gaia started literally as a dream and has grown into a world-class retreat and spa. We have an organic garden where we grow our own fruits and vegetables, and we’ve brought in incredible chefs and the best healers in the world. I would wait a whole year for our massages there!

  I’m so proud of Gregg for devoting his life to making this one of the best spas in the world, where everything is done with loving intention. Everyone who goes there benefits from the beauty and the peace of this special place. Gregg and I talk several times a week about everything that’s decided on the property.

  The ethos is surrender.

  Let the signs remind you

  We are passengers.

  Let the signs remind you

  To surrender.

  My personal life – something I hate discussing with the press – had bloomed with Patrick McDermott, a cameraman, who was my on-again, off-again boyfriend for eight years. It might seem strange that, despite being such a public figure in this day and age, I try to keep my life private. With the publication of this book, though, I feel I have an opportunity to talk about this for a moment.

  The last time I saw Patrick, he was at my house and we were deciding to take a break from each other again. The truth is I don’t really know why I never fully committed to Patrick. When I met John Easterling, my husband, I knew it was right immediately. With Patrick and I, there were always questions.

  It was June, and Chloe and I were leaving for Australia for a holiday. I had been there about a week when I received a phone call from my assistant Dana, who asked me if I’d heard from Patrick. I’d received a missed call from him a few days after I arrived in Australia, but when I tried to call back there was no response.

  Dana told me that he had gone on a fishing trip on a charter boat off San Pedro in Los Angeles, which was something he loved to do. He was supposed to show up for a family get-together that weekend, but he didn’t make it. This was not like him. He didn’t pick his son up, either. That set off alarm bells for his ex-wife Yvette. Me too. He adored his son and wouldn’t go on trips with me if it meant he couldn’t see his boy.

  As time went on and he remained missing, I had such an odd and hollow feeling in my gut. I had been through cancer and divorce, but the idea of someone in my life suddenly being gone without a trace left me with an emptiness I hadn’t known before. There were no answers. Only questions.

  All I could do was wait for news and take long walks on the beach.

  By now, I was incredibly worried and longed for real answers. Dennis Nebrich was the head investigator from the Coast Guard and he did a wonderful job. As far as we knew, Patrick went on a fishing trip and didn’t return. His car was still at the dock. On the charter boat, they found his wallet and keys.

  I called my old security friend Gavin de Becker and asked what else I could do. We decided to send a couple of his private investigators to Mexico to certain places Patrick had talked about. I asked Gavin if I should get on TV and do a public plea, but he advised against it. The private investigators placed missing person posters everywhere in Mexico and made a lot of inquiries in case Patrick had decided to disappear, but nobody had seen him. I also thought he could have gone to Korea, where he was born, but as far as we know that isn’t so.

  By November 2005, four months after his disappearance, the United States Coast Guard’s investigation concluded that Patrick ‘most likely’ drowned.

  The media frenzy wouldn’t end, though, and there remains endless speculation that he faked his own death. The case even appeared on America’s Most Wanted and then on Dateline NBC. Bogus and manufactured pictures appear every year on the anniversary of his disappearance with articles saying he has been sighted in different places. I find it strange. They’re always from a distance, blurry and fuzzy. In this age of cell phones, wouldn’t you think that someone would have a really clear picture of him by now and would immediately post it on the internet?

  Part of my healing process was building a stone labyrinth as a private memorial to him. My friend, Aussie landscape designer Coral Browning, helped me build it. Patrick loved nature and gardens. I know the labyrinth is something he would have enjoyed.

  There is some good that has come from the bad.

  The wonderful thing that has come out of this is that his ex-wife, Yvette, and I became close friends. Our main concern has been their son, Chance. Yvette believes that Patrick would never have left his boy. I agree.

  I lived in pain for so long over this, but I had to teach myself to live in the now, which is an important life lesson.

  The truth is, I’ll never really know what happened.

  Sometimes you need a new perspective when life turns upside down.

  I decided to get out of LA and do a road trip to Vegas to go to a Louise Hay seminar. It had been about a year since Patrick disappeared and I wanted the chance to meet the woman who had helped me so much already. She was my superstar. I wondered if she could help me with this period of my life as well.

  I shared the driving with Rona and her daughter, Tottie. Along the way we stopped to stretch our legs and get some gas. I was at the wheel when Rona went inside the gas station to pay and then we took off. Some twenty-odd minutes later, the people in the car next to us, which was filled with adorable young men, began waving at us. I thought, How sweet! and politely waved back. They kept waving and waving – which became pointing. It turns out the gas cap wasn’t on and we had been spewing gas all down the highway and they were letting us know!

  As Louise taught me, thank God for the little kindnesses in life. We all laughed our heads off while arguing as a family about who filled it and didn’t put the cap back on. (It was me – so embarrassed!) Luckily, we had enough fuel to get us to the next gas station. Then, driving into Vegas at night through the desert, we proceeded to get really lost and found ourselves going in circles. When we finally reached our destination, it was straight to the bar at the Wynn Resort for three dirty martinis. We’d earned them!

  I have to admit that this bar became our hangout after spending all day being so spiritual at the seminar. I needed both kinds of spirit at this point. It was looking inward, followed by dirty martinis and interviewing all the waitresses about their lives.

  Life, indeed, goes on. You just have to grasp it.

  After five days in Vegas, a very nice police officer pulled us
over for speeding on the way home. He recognised me and let us off with just a warning.

  Thank you, sir. Another small kindness.

  It wasn’t long before this time in my life would translate into my new CD, Grace and Gratitude. It was produced and co-written by my friend and Canadian singer and songwriter, Amy Sky. Most of the songs were inspired by loss in my life and healing. I’ve never been a drinker, really, but as I recorded this CD, vodka was my friend. I was still pretty sad, and singing these emotional songs was hard. I have to admit a thimbleful of vodka really helped me. I’m a lightweight!

  The music on this CD came from my heart and spirit, and it still gives me pleasure and peace. I loved that we used Eastern influences including Tibetan and Japanese chants. I was also inspired by my friends Nancy and Jim, who are devout Buddhists. I would pray and chant with them as we said Nam-myoho-renge-kyo. It speaks of devotion, determination and manifesting the good. I also pray with my Christian friends. I respect all belief systems because I believe they all come from the same place: love and forgiveness.

  My grandfather Max Born had a famous quote where he said, ‘The belief that there is only one truth, and that oneself is in possession of it, is the root of all evil in the world.’

  My whole life I searched for one thing I could believe in, but I couldn’t find just one because I believe in possibilities and respect all people’s different faiths. I have a real problem with people killing each other for what they believe, so my grandfather’s words put it all into perspective for me.

  I agree with him.

  One of my first television roles – as Luv’ly Livvy on The Happy Show when I was fifteen.

  Early days – singing on Melbourne telly!

  With my dear friend Pat Carroll, my singing partner, in Trafalgar Square, London!

  I loved working with Jeff Lynne (right) and my lifelong friend John Farrar (left) on the soundtrack for Xanadu. Thank you, Jeff, for ‘Xanadu’! Thank you, John, for ‘Magic’ and ‘Suddenly’!

  In a break from rehearsal at London Palladium in 1970 with my favourite duet partner – Sir Cliff Richard.

  Performing ‘Physical’ – with the haircut that became all the rage! Thank you, Armando Cosio!

  My talented, fun friend ‘Miss Fleur’ (Thiemeyer) designed my clothes for videos and stage for years. She created the iconic headband look for ‘Physical’! Thank you, Flower!

  My mother took this photo of John Travolta and me in Australia when he was promoting a movie – we’re with my nephew Brett’s dog!

  Sandy’s jacket still fits! I’m planning to auction my jacket – and yes, those pants – to raise funds to support my ONJ wellness and research programs.

  I made this collage from our Grease filming days – sweet memories!

  Here I am with my talented Liv On co-writers and dear friends Amy Sky (left) and Beth Nielsen Chapman (right), and (above) in the recording studio.

  Recording the Friends for Christmas album in Santa Barbara with (from left) my manager, Mark Hartley; John’s manager, Glenn Wheatley; me; my favourite singer, John Farnham; and our wonderful producer, Chong Lim.

  On the road and in the air with my team! (From left) Marlen Landin, Steve and Martha Real y Vasquez, me, John, and Michael Caprio.

  I loved my experiences working on these movies. How lucky was I to dance with icons John Travolta and Gene Kelly!

  Xanadu (1980)

  Toomorrow (1970)

  Grease (1978)

  Two of a Kind (1983)

  Sordid Lives (2000)

  A Few Best Men (2011)

  Not pictured: Funny Things Happen Down Under (1965), It’s My Party (1996) – I loved working with Grease director Randal Kleiser again – and Score! A Hockey Musical (2010).

  If all your hopes survive

  Destiny will arrive.

  I’ll bring all your dreams alive

  For you.

  In 2008, to raise awareness and garner donations to build the ONJ Cancer Wellness & Research Centre, I was asked to do something rather extraordinary: walk the Great Wall of China. The idea was to make it a media spectacular and invite as many celebrities as possible to join me. Someone had approached CEO Peter Dalton at the Austin Hospital with the idea four years earlier and it took that long to get permission from the Chinese government. I thought it was a wonderfully inspired idea, and, with Peter, began to plan it.

  The whole thing was pretty complicated from the get-go, but we were determined. This trip would be the first major fundraiser for the ONJ Cancer Centre and I was thrilled to participate both on the ground and in the planning stages. Before we ‘got out there’, though, we had to be totally organised, and there were times when I thought, Oh no, this will never happen. But each little stop was followed by a start and the plan to walk gradually moved on.

  As part of this big project, I released The Great Walk to Beijing: A Celebration in Song to raise further proceeds. Artists including Sir Cliff Richard, Keith Urban, Richard Marx and Barry Gibb all signed on to do duets. I just called my friends and they were so generous with their time and their efforts.

  It was particularly lovely to reunite with Cliff Richard because we went so far back. He was so quick to come on board.

  ‘Anything you need, Liv. And I can’t wait to walk,’ he told me.

  And it really touched my heart singing with my talented friends including singer/songwriter Jann Arden from Canada, who I’m signalling out because she’s a fellow cancer thriver, and Aussie singer Belinda Emmett, who sadly passed away before we could record. We made sure to feature one of her tracks on the CD in her memory.

  In the lead-up to the walk, each day I would receive delicious and goosebump-causing messages asking the most exciting things: ‘Hey Olivia, wondering if you’re good with camping in the Gobi Desert? Because there aren’t any hotels there.’ My response: ‘It will be a big adventure. Sign me up!’

  The mission would take twenty days of walking the 256 kilometres along portions of the Great Wall. We would begin on 7 April and end up in Beijing on 28 April. Best of all, I would be joined by incredible friends and family, celebrities from the music, acting and sports worlds, and, most wonderfully, cancer thrivers like myself.

  I loved the physical challenge of walking hundreds of kilometres (something I had never done) over some really challenging sections of the Wall, passing through deserts and mountains while battling through drastic weather changes. I was told that quite often we’d be facing tough conditions and harsh physical challenges, but that felt right. Wasn’t it a great metaphor for what we were doing in the first place? This is exactly what cancer patients face as they climb their own personal walls to recovery.

  I knew it would be mind-blowing. A once-in-a-lifetime event.

  I also knew that I’d better get ready for what promised to be an intense experience. ‘Let’s Get Physical’ actually became my theme song again! Even if I was tired from a show the night before, I dragged myself out of bed and hit the hotel gym as often as I could. I focused on cardio and getting my heart rate up. I couldn’t even imagine how much stamina would be necessary for this endeavour, but figured I needed as much as possible when I read that the Wall is 45 degrees steep in a lot of places and always uneven.

  ‘How are you going to physically survive this?’ a friend asked.

  ‘One day at a time,’ I replied.

  It was amazing how this Walk the Wall project came together – 200 people quickly agreed to be there with me when I took those steps. In addition to Sir Cliff Richard signing on immediately, we also had the lovely Didi Conn, Dannii Minogue and TV host Leeza Gibbons (a total sweetheart). Aussie Olympic swimming legend Ian Thorpe showed up, and lost his luggage – including his size 17 (no, that’s not a typo) walking shoes. They couldn’t find a pair to fit him in China, so he walked the Wall barefoot.

  Barefoot!

  There was someone else walking into my life as well. His name was John Easterling and he was my new . . . everything. We’ll get to that in a
moment.

  The plan was to go to nine different provinces in China. We would fly and bus to different parts of the Wall since we couldn’t possibly cover the entire Mongolian side on foot during the time period allotted. Each day would be a ten- to twelve-hour endurance test.

  Soon I was flying to Shanghai to begin the walk. I wanted to start immediately, and it was so exciting to meet the team. Louise Georgeson had worked hard with Peter Dalton to figure out all the details and she was there to greet us. Then it was off to bed. The next morning would come soon enough – we were to be up at dawn.

  I was awake, ready, and . . . woefully unprepared.

  It didn’t take long before I found out that there wasn’t enough gym time in the world to prepare for this experience. The Wall, it turned out, was basically a straight up climb, and the steps were deep, steep and quite often slippery. You had to be on your game with each step.

  We kept walking up, up, up into the clouds. It was one of the most challenging, purely physical moments of my entire life. After the first day, I didn’t think I’d ever walk again because the lactic acid build-up made my legs feel as if they were on fire. But all of us pushed through pain to get to the other side.

  I ignored the aches and pains, kept huffing and puffing, and then each day found my body getting stronger. After a few days my breathing began to slow down as I walked – my body was quickly adapting. My motivation was our cause and the panoramic views were stunning – it was a once-in-a-lifetime way to experience something so breathtaking. It became exhilarating to push myself to new heights, literally. As I walked, I imagined all of the workers who built the Wall and the blood, sweat and sacrifice that went into creating something for the ages.