The Perfect Outsider

by Loreth Anne White

  “Buckshot is useless against a charging bear,” he said, quickly loading the gun. He clicked it in place. “You need slugs. Even so, you have to hit just right or you’re dead.”

  She stared, dumbfounded.

  “Come,” he said. Then he nodded at Brad. “You, too. We stick together in a group—it’ll make us look big to the bears. Follow my lead, and whatever you do, don’t run. Which way is she? Show me,” he said to Brad.

  Brad led them to a narrow trail through the low scrub.

  Jesse began to hike into the bush.

  “Wait!” June quickly grabbed Eager’s collar and took him back to the house. “I’m taking him back. I don’t want him to get hurt,” she said.

  “Catch up to us, then,” Jesse called over his shoulder.

  June ran back to the cave house with Eager and yelled for Sonya to look after him.

  “How do you know this stuff about bears?” June said, breathless, when she caught up to Jesse and Brad.

  “I don’t know. I just do.”

  * * *

  June struggled to keep up with Jesse. He moved with ease and stealth through the wilderness, like a great big mountain lion, all powerful muscle. Brad was panting heavily behind her, crashing through brush clumsily.

  They crested a ridge. The sun was warm on their backs.

  Jesse pointed. “There they are.”

  There was a reverence in his voice that made June look up at him. He was squinting into the sunlight and crinkles fanned out from his eyes. He looked rugged—a real Marlboro mountain man, as if he belonged out here, and June felt safe with him.

  She’d always been confident on her own in the wilderness. She knew how to navigate, she’d done her survival courses, she knew her firearms, but this sense of security she felt standing beside Jesse was something different. It was like having someone at your side, someone you could lean on if the going got rough, someone who’d take a few knocks and fight off the bad guys for you—as he’d done for Lacy and her daughters.

  And June realized again how deeply she missed Matt and being part of a team.

  The bears—a sow and her two cubs, their coats reddish-brown—were grazing along a flat part of the valley. They were beautiful, majestic.

  “They’re healthy,” June whispered. “It’s not common to see them here. She must’ve brought her cubs down along the spine of the mountain range.”

  “This way,” said Jesse as he began to walk along the crest of the ridge.

  “We’re going to approach them head-on?” asked Brad, clearly terrified.

  “I want them to see us, to pick up our scent in the wind,” Jesse said. “That way they’ll most likely just move away.”

  As he spoke, the mother lifted her nose and tasted the wind.

  “There.” Jesse smiled. “She got us.”

  The sow stared in their direction for a while.

  “Definitely black bear,” June said.

  “But they’re brown,” said Brad

  “Black bear can be anything from a soft cinnamon color to pitch-black,” Jesse said. “You can tell they’re not grizzlies from the shape of their heads and the sow’s shoulders. She has no hump.”

  “So they’re not as dangerous?” said Brad.

  “Black bears are responsible for more predatory attacks on humans than grizzlies are. You need to respect their space just the same.”

  “Jesse,” June said softly. “Have you seen grizzlies in the wild?”

  He nodded. Then turned suddenly to her. Sunlight danced in his eyes, and a smile curved his lips. “I recall being on a horse, in mountains, and seeing bears—brown bears. Not just once. I…feel like it’s a part of me.”

  “You don’t get brown bears in this part of Wyoming,” she said. “If you’ve seen them in this state, it’s in the northwest. Maybe the Wind River range, Yellowstone, Grand Tetons.”

  He closed his eyes a moment.

  “And I can feel forest, snowcapped peaks, shale slopes. Being out for days at a time.”

  As he spoke, June saw relief in his features. He liked what he was seeing.

  “See?” She grinned, infected by his sudden good energy. “I told you it would start coming back.”

  “I see Molly!” Brad interrupted. “Over there—look. She’s trapped behind the bears and can’t get back on the trail.”

  June saw a figure moving through the scrub a distance behind the bruins.

  “She’s downwind of them. They don’t know she’s there,” Jesse said. “Come, we need to crowd them a bit, get them to move eastward, away from her.”

  He began to hike down the ridge, toward the bears, June and Brad following quietly behind. The sow reared up on her hind legs, waving her head back and forth, mouth open.

  “She’s going to attack,” whispered Brad.

  “She’s just getting a better look, tasting the air,” Jesse said.

  The bear dropped back onto all fours and began to lumber, slowly, out of the valley, making her way east. The cubs followed.

  * * *

  Molly hugged June, breathless with relief to see them, but Jesse noted she had no basket, no berries.

  He walked behind the three of them on the return to the cave house and more memories washed over him. This time he felt himself riding a horse again, with a packhorse tethered to his saddle. He had everything he needed for an extended stay in the mountains—his 270 Winchester rifle at his side and his twelve-gauge Remington WingMaster shotgun. His Beretta was holstered at his hip.

  And in his memory he was looking for something…poachers. Jesse stopped dead in his tracks, pulse racing, perspiration breaking out over his body. He tried to dig deeper, but the images were gone.

  Slowly he began to walk behind June, Brad and Molly again. Molly dropped something—it looked like a cell phone. She quickly scooped it up and glanced behind her to see if Jesse had seen. He looked away, pretending he hadn’t.

  When they reached the house, Molly and Brad went inside, but June lingered outside in the sunshine. Jesse was pleased. He liked to watch the way the sun burned fire into her red hair. Her cheeks were pink from the walk and he realized how tired and pale she’d been looking—she still looked tired, but the color in her face stirred something deep in Jesse. He wanted to help her rest, find peace. He wanted to see her smile again.

  He held out the shotgun to her.

  “Keep it,” she said. “I trust you.”

  Her words sent a warm rush through his chest. June made him feel good. She chased away the darker sensations lingering just under his consciousness, and Jesse realized he was falling, hard, for this woman. It worried him.

  Would he be falling for June in the same way if he knew who he was?

  She placed her hands on the banister that ran around the edge of the patio overlooking the creek. “Those bears were beautiful, Jesse. It was like a gift seeing them.” She paused, looked up at him. “Thank you,” she said quietly. “For a moment back there I thought you were going to take the twelve-gauge and split. You didn’t have to help Molly.” She laughed. “She hasn’t exactly been endearing herself to you.”

  He came up to her, stood closer than he needed to.

  “June, do you get cell reception out here?”

  “Why?” she said, her features instantly guarded again.

  “Just curious.”

  “We’re out of cell-tower range in this valley. There’s no reception on the west flank of the mountain on the Cold Plains side, either.”

  “What about over there?” He nodded in the direction they’d found Molly.

  “I don’t know,” June said. “I haven’t tried out there.”

  “You said there’s a town over that far ridge?”

  “Yes, Little Gulch. That’s where we have an EXIT counselor who handles the transitions from the safe house.”

  “So, conceivably there might be some cell reception from a tower on the Little Gulch side.”

  “Like I said, I haven’t tried to use a cell phone out th
ere, but I suppose it’s feasible.”

  “How do you get radio reception in the house?”

  “Why all the questions?” He heard the suspicion in her tone.

  He smiled. “I’m just interested. Radio reception is sketchy even in a parking garage. A cave can’t be any better.”

  Her shoulders relaxed a little. “I rigged up some portable repeaters, same kind as we use for SAR work in remote areas. But there’s always a worry one of the Devotee henchmen will stumble upon our radio frequency, so we limit communication to emergencies. Parking garages, huh?”

  “Don’t ask me how I know.”

  Her smile deepened.

  And Jesse didn’t even think about what he did next. He put his arm around June and drew her close. She stiffened for a moment and looked up at him in surprise. Then she looked out over the sunny valley and allowed herself to lean into him. Jesse could feel the tension draining from her muscles as she did. He rested his cheek against her hair. It was warm from the sun, and soft. An ache began in his chest.

  “You fit me,” he said quietly. “As if you belong.”

  She said nothing, and when he glanced down at her face her saw the glisten of tears on her cheeks.

  “June—”

  She shook her head. “It’s nothing. I—I’ve just missed being held.”

  They stood like that in silence for a while, and more than anything Jesse wanted his memory back, to know who he was. Because he wanted June in his life—he needed to know it was possible.

  “I have to go to Cold Plains, June,” he said. “I need to lay my eyes on this Samuel Grayson, see if it jogs my memory free.”

  “They’ll kill you. We’ve had this discussion.”

  “I can’t just do nothing.”

  She pulled out of his embrace.

  “Wait for the FBI, Jesse. I trust Agent Hawk Bledsoe. He’s away right now, but—”

  “No feds.”

  She swallowed, and concern filtered into her eyes. “Are you really so worried the FBI is going to find something on you, lock you up?”

  He didn’t answer for a few beats. Worry deepened in her features.

  “I told you, I believe there is something dark in my past.” He paused, trying to figure out how best to articulate his feelings. “Thing is, June, if I’ve done something illegal, I’ll buck up and take the knocks, but I want to know what I’ve done and why I did it. I want to understand my guilt, my motivations. I don’t want to be locked up and just told I’ve committed some act. I’d prefer to atone for my deeds by choice, in my heart. Does that make any sense at all?”

  She was staring at him, a strange look on her face. “Jesse, going to Cold Plains and getting killed is not going to help whatever is haunting you.”

  He inhaled deeply. “The reason I came here, I believe, is because of what is haunting me, June. I’ve got nothing to lose—”

  “Apart from your life!” she snapped.

  “But,” he said quietly, his gaze holding hers, “I could have everything to gain.”

  Her heart was thudding hard—he could see it in the pulse at her neck.

  “Don’t do it, Jesse—don’t go.”

  He grasped her shoulders. “If anything, my leaving will take the heat off you guys here,” he said. “If I stay in the house, those men might come back looking for me. You heard Davis. Next time they might find that tunnel.”

  “Hawk Bledsoe will be back in two days—”

  He shook his head. “I’m leaving, June. I won’t be here when he arrives.”

  She stared at him in silence. He became conscious of the chuckling creek, a soft breeze rustling the reeds that grew nearby, the sound of birds.

  “I have an idea,” she said very quietly. “A plan.”

  “What kind of plan?”

  “It could work, on more than one level—but if it doesn’t, we’re both dead.”

  Chapter 7

  “It’ll be risky,” June said as she outlined her plan.

  They were sharing breakfast at a small stone table outside, near the water and partially shaded by the rock overhang. From their vantage point they had a full view of the valley and would be able to see anyone approaching. Even as they enjoyed each other’s company, they remained watchful.

  Eager was lying at June’s feet, a warning system himself as he listened to their environment.

  “But if you hike out of Hidden Valley that way—” she pointed in the direction Molly had gone earlier “—you reach Little Gulch in about four hours. It’s a slightly bigger town than Cold Plains, maybe three thousand residents, and it has a small airstrip. I’ll give you a pack and supplies, and you’ve got GPS.” She hesitated. “And I’m going to let you take Eager.”

  He set his coffee mug down. “Why?”

  “Because it will bolster the story I gave the Cold Plains police chief, Bo Fargo.” She rubbed her brow. “I told him the reason for my absence was that Eager got bitten by something, and that I’d taken him to stay overnight at the vet’s in Little Gulch because I’ve had clashes of opinion with the Cold Plains vet—something I need to mend now. So, if I hike back into Cold Plains and pick up my truck, I can—”

  “Truck?”

  “I live a double life, Jesse. It’s complicated. I rent a place on Hannah Mendes’s ranch on the outskirts of town. Hannah covers for me all the nights and some days that I am here at the safe house. And I work two days a week for the Cold Plains Urgent Care Center’s ambulance service as a paramedic, so I need to put in appearances for that. The job is what allegedly brought me to Cold Plains.”

  “Plus there’s your volunteer SAR work.”

  She nodded. “And there’ve been a fair number of searches these days for which they called me because I’m the only volunteer with a validated K9.”

  “You can’t keep this up, June. You’ve got to find a way to slow down.”

  “There’s no way out now, Jesse. Only one way to go and that’s to the end.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Once I’ve got my truck, I’ll drive around the mountains to Little Gulch, allegedly to fetch Eager from the vet. I’ll make sure someone sees me heading out of town without Eager, and I’ll make it known that I’m going to pick him up. Meanwhile, when you get to Little Gulch, go wait for me at a place called Dixon’s Pub and Beer Garden. It’s a bit of a dive, but it’s dog-friendly and it’s right on the outskirts of town—it’ll be one of the first places you see, big pink neon sign, can’t miss it. I’ll meet you there later this afternoon.”

  She took another sip from her mug, and Jesse noticed her hands were shaking slightly.

  “June, you really need to rest. You’ll—”

  “I’m fine,” she said briskly. “Tonight is the annual Cold Plains corn-roast festival. We’ll drive back into Cold Plains, right down Main Street, while everyone is gathering outside the community center for the festivities. If they see us coming in from the outside, with Eager this time, and if no one recognizes you, I’ll tell them that I picked you up from the airstrip when I went to fetch Eager from the vet. You’re Hannah’s new help for her ranch.”

  He smiled. “Hope there’s a cowboy hat in it for me.”

  Her eyes remained serious. “Davis has one. You’ll need to hide that cut on your head, anyway. Remind me to give you back the cash Sonya found in your jeans pocket before she tossed them.”

  “She tossed my jeans?”

  “I cut the leg open, remember, to see where you were bleeding?”

  “And there was nothing else in the pockets?”

  “Just a hundred bucks in notes.”

  He frowned, wondering why he’d had absolutely no identification on him at all.

  “If all goes smoothly, we’ll mingle awhile at the corn roast. I’ll tell everyone we used to date way back, and that I recommended you for the job on Hannah’s ranch because you’re out of work.” Her cheeks pinked a little, and Jesse loved the way her complexion revealed her moods. She probably hated it.

  “You better look after Eage
r—that dog is everything to me.”

  June was giving him her complete trust, and the scope of what she was trying to achieve struck him square in the chest.

  God, he could love this woman, and the thought just fueled his desperation to get out there and find out who he was.

  “If we can pull it off tonight, then you can use the work on Hannah’s ranch as a cover while you figure things out. Hannah will pay you for anything you do on the ranch, of course.”

  “I don’t want her money.”

  “You have a hundred bucks to your name, Jesse. That’s it.”

  “Maybe I’m rich.” He grinned. “But I just don’t remember.”

  This time she did smile.

  “Yeah, and maybe I’m the Queen of Sheba.”

  He laughed. Then sobered almost as quickly. “You’re right, June, it is risky. Because if someone does recognize me, you go down with me. I don’t want to take that chance.”

  “If it works, Jesse, it shores up my story about my absence. It gives Hannah added protection, and you can help us, hiding in plain sight.”

  “I don’t know, June.”

  She leaned forward. “It’s the only way you’re going to get into Cold Plains alive, Jesse, and God knows Hannah and I could use someone on our team. Besides, if I don’t do something to bolster my story with Bo Fargo, stat, he’s going to look into it, and I’m going down, anyway. So, do we have a deal?”

  Her gaze was direct. Adrenaline rippled through him.

  “Deal,” he said quietly. “With one caveat. If I think you’re going to get hurt, I pull the plug.” As Jesse spoke, he caught sight of Molly watching them from behind the window.

  “And one more thing—we don’t tell anyone in the safe house what we’re about to do,” he said, his eye on Molly.

  “Because?”

  “Because they’re safe in what they don’t know.”

  June trusted that kid—but he didn’t.

  * * *

  Before he got his gear together, Jesse went to find Molly.

  “So, were the berries good out there, Molly?”

  Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I dropped my basket of berries when I saw the bears. What’s it to you?”