Our First Christmas

by Lisa Jackson

  “Aren’t you the gentleman?” Dani said.

  “All this talk about the past. Makes a fellow want to bring back chivalry.”

  They headed for the entrance. “It’s just hard for me to come here without imagining Sarah strolling the grounds.”

  “I wonder if any of the guests accidentally dropped their gold watches or diamonds on the lawns,” Sawyer said.

  “Now you’re thinking,” Dani said. “Keep your eyes peeled, Mr. Chivalry.”

  Enchanted, Airlee-on-the-Sound certainly was. Every tree was adorned with lights. The giant oaks had white streamers, appearing and disappearing among the branches like fireworks. Archways of lights formed tunnels to walk through, and entire fields beckoned with trees sparkling in every color. Lights formed flowers on the grounds. The grape arbor was dazzling. Look to your left, there was Santa and his sleigh. To the right, towering palm trees were aglow. Every path led to a new excitement. In the distance was a barge, with seven swans pulling a sleigh. Christmas carols played from speakers hidden about the place. Dani was thrilled when they came upon giant flip-flops and sunglasses all lit up on the ground.

  “Now this is very Southern,” Sawyer said as his camera snapped.

  “Don’t forget the palm trees, and the crabs,” Dani called.

  “Crabs?” Sawyer said.

  Dani laughed and pointed to a light display of crabs crawling around wooden crates. “All I got for Christmas is crabs!” she said.

  Sawyer laughed, snapping and flashing his camera nonstop. In almost every one, he insisted Dani get in for a photo. Sometimes she could tell he was taking her picture on the sly. She wondered if he did this with all the staff writers. She had a feeling he didn’t. She had a feeling that he had feelings for her. She didn’t know what to think about that, and she hated to admit how good it felt to know that someone, someone very, very attractive, had a little crush on her. She liked him. All that sparring between them had been because of her. Because she didn’t want to admit that she had a little crush on him, too. But she wasn’t going to let a little crush determine her future. Besides, they called it a crush for a reason. She wasn’t going to hurt anyone else like she hurt Nate. She was here to make up for all of that. When Sawyer was done taking her thumbs-up next to the crabs, he pointed to a white tent set up on their left. “I can take your picture sitting on Santa’s lap.”

  “Oh my God,” Dani said. She grabbed Sawyer’s hand.

  “I was kidding but if you’re that excited about it, let’s get in line.” He squeezed her hand gently.

  Dani pulled away and pointed. “It’s Nate,” she said. He stood just a few feet away under a pine tree that looked as if it were on fire with crystals. He was sandwiched in between Anya and Ruth.

  “Let the games begin,” Sawyer said under his breath.

  “No,” Dani said. “I’m going to be nice. Just like I promised you.”

  “Does that mean you’re no longer going to try to snatch him away?”

  “I’m going to trust in fate,” Dani said. “I’m going to believe in Christmas miracles.”

  “What if you’re granted one but you don’t recognize it?” Sawyer said. And there it was, written all over his face, an explicit acknowledgment. He was hers for the taking. And with the lights glittering all around them, the warm breeze, the Christmas carols playing—she was tempted. Tempted to bridge the small gap between them and just see what it would be like to kiss him. Not like the kiss she gave him in front of the ice cream shop, but a real kiss. One where she would let him kiss her back. There was probably mistletoe hanging above their heads anyway. Dani glanced up, just to see if she was right, but Sawyer’s eyes remained on her. “We don’t need it,” he said as if he knew exactly what she was thinking. Instead, she turned away.

  “Come on,” she said. “You won’t get more Southern than Ruth Hathaway. We should feature her in some of the photos.” Dani took off across the lawn before he could confuse her any more.

  Nate looked so handsome in a black leather jacket and maroon dress shirt. Where were his T-shirts and jeans? He used to dress more like Sawyer. Anya was dressed up, too. Dani imagined she never wore jeans or sweatpants. She was more like Ruth than even Ruth would ever want to admit.

  “Well, hello, there,” Dani said. “I’m so glad you could make it.” Dani made note of the fact that Ruth was standing in between Nate and Anya, preventing them from touching.

  “Darling,” Ruth said, uncharacteristically cheerful. She broke out of line to hug and kiss Dani on each cheek. It was something the woman had never, ever done previously.

  “Hello, Nate,” Dani said as their eyes met. “Anya,” she said quickly, so as not to seem rude. It was so strange, so wrong! How many times had Dani come to Enchanted Airlee with Nate? Since they were kids. Maybe just being here together would bring back all those wonderful memories. “Isn’t this the most beautiful place you’ve ever seen?” Dani said to Anya.

  Anya looked at Dani. “It’s lovely,” she said. There was a lot of hesitation in her voice. “Very . . . quaint.”

  Nate laughed. “Anya finds Wilmington a bit underrated compared to London,” he said. “You must feel the same way about New York?”

  “Actually, she doesn’t,” Sawyer said. Dani jumped. Shoot. How rude. She’d forgotten all about Sawyer for a moment. Was that the definition of insanity? Plotting to kiss someone one moment, forgetting he existed the next?

  “How’s that?” Nate said. Dani had to admit, she loved watching Nate take in Sawyer. Was he jealous?

  “Dani hasn’t stopped gushing about this little town since she arrived. Give it time, Anya, a few minutes in this girl’s presence, and you’ll see it through magical eyes.” Sawyer held eye contact with Anya, treating to her to his best, seductive grin. Nate frowned. Nope, he definitely didn’t like Sawyer. Was he jealous because Sawyer was with her, or because he was flirting with Anya? Sawyer was certainly taking his role seriously, laying it on thick. Dani didn’t like how his eyes seemed to twinkle when he looked at the Brit. Then again, it could have been from all the lights.

  “Nate, I’d like you to meet our talented staff photographer, Sawyer Drake,” Dani said.

  “You think I’m talented?” Sawyer said. He turned his charm on Ruth. “First I’ve heard her say it, ma’am,” he said.

  Ruth Hathaway let out a startling sound. If Dani wasn’t in her right mind, she would say that Sawyer had just made the matriarch laugh. Soon, Anya joined in. Nate’s and Dani’s eyes met. There he was. Her Nate. Dani gave a little smile. Nate smiled back.

  “I need a couple of models for my photo shoot,” Sawyer said, offering each woman an arm. “Would you mind?”

  To Dani’s astonishment, Ruth took his arm right away. “Come along, my dear,” Ruth said to Anya.

  Anya flashed Nate a look. He smiled at her and nodded. “Very well,” Anya said. “Lead the way.” Sawyer didn’t even glance at Dani as he guided the two women toward the grape arbor. And just like that, Dani was alone with Nate.

  “Shall we?” Nate said. He began to walk toward the marsh. He wants me alone, Dani thought. Away from prying eyes. She followed with her heart thumping in her chest, resisting the urge to turn and see what Sawyer was up to.

  “Remember when we were kids and we would hide behind the trees?” Dani said.

  “We were convinced they would never find us,” Nate said.

  “But they always did.”

  “He’s a character,” Nate said.

  “Sawyer?”

  “Nanna seems smitten.”

  “He does have a way with the ladies.”

  “Does that include you?” Nate stopped abruptly and turned around. Dani almost ran into him.

  “What exactly are you asking?”

  “You told me you loved me. That you wanted me back.”

  “I do.”

  “Yet you’re here with another man?”

  “We work together,” Dani said. “That’s all.” Oh no. Why was her voice cracki
ng? It wasn’t her fault that Sawyer was so good-looking. Dani held her breath. Didn’t it mean something that he was jealous? Finally, Nate gave a nod, then continued walking. They stopped at the creek and looked out at the sailboats in the distance. Ghost trees towered just behind them, their stark branches backlit by the lights from the grounds. A twenty-foot pier jutted out along the creek. Nate continued to lead Dani away from the crowds. Her stomach was in knots as she watched his broad shoulders. He looked good all dressed up. Toward the end of the pier he stood and put his hands on the railing. So many memories of Nate. She always thought they would have time. To work things out. At least a second chance.

  “You’ve really messed me up, coming here,” Nate said quietly. Tears sprung instantly to Dani’s eyes. He still had feelings for her. There was still a chance.

  “I’m not here to cause trouble,” Dani said carefully.

  Nate turned his beautiful green eyes on her. “It wasn’t easy for me to actively ignore all your calls, and texts, and letters,” he said. “And I didn’t do that to hurt you, either. But you ended it, Danielle. You ended us.”

  “I postponed us.”

  “I didn’t see it that way. Heck. The whole town didn’t see it that way.”

  “I know. I know and I’m sorry.”

  “I’m not the same man I was two years ago.”

  I know, she wanted to shout. You’re more like the man I wanted. The man willing to leave Wilmington for love. “I had to try. Before it was too late. I had to tell you that I still love you. If I could take that night back—I would have said yes. I would have stayed here and—”

  “And what, Dani? Write articles for Star News or Encore?”

  “Sure. Why not?”

  “Because you’re too good. Not that our local papers aren’t good. But you deserve a much bigger audience.”

  “What?”

  “Your articles. They’re very, very good.”

  Dani hadn’t expected this. It made sense, of course it did, that Nate would read her articles. But somehow, because of the walls he’d put between them, she just assumed he hadn’t even thought of her, let alone read her articles. “You read them?”

  “Of course.”

  “It’s kind of just a fluff magazine—”

  “But your work isn’t. I can tell you’re pushing the limits as much as they’ll let you. I really liked the piece on the homeless vet and his dog.”

  Perry, and Boots. She was proud of that one. She wrote about how that dog was a better human being than most of the people who stepped around them. The dog loved unconditionally, without judgment. Sawyer was with her on that one. His pictures were absolutely beautiful. They captured the humanity of a man and his best friend, sticking it out on the streets. “I can’t take all the credit,” she said.

  “The photo,” Nate acknowledged. “That was his?” Dani nodded. “You always did like the artistic type,” he said.

  “I told you. There’s nothing going on between me and Sawyer.”

  “It’s none of my business.”

  “Nate. I can’t tell you how happy I am that your art is taking off. Anya was right about one thing. I would never do anything to stand in the way of that.”

  “I know you tried to tell me I needed to go somewhere with a bigger audience,” Nate said. “I guess part of me thought you were just biased.”

  “But Anya was different,” Dani said. “Because she’s an art curator.”

  “We didn’t start out romantic, of course. It was a fluke she was even here. They were filming a period piece and they needed her expertise with the artwork featured in it. She happened upon me on the beach, believe it or not.”

  “Building one of your sculptures,” Dani said. Oh, she could believe it. She could picture it.

  “I really threw myself into my work after you left. To be honest, some of what I was doing was quite dark. I guess women go for that kind of thing.” He laughed. Dani laughed along with him, and they continued laughing until they looked at each other and it came to a dead stop. A sense of shame invaded her. Just a few minutes ago she had been thinking about kissing Sawyer. Now she wanted to kiss Nate. She was too deprived of affection. She’d better not sit on Santa’s lap. What was wrong with her?

  She knew exactly what it was like to kiss Nate. He was a little hesitant, a little polite, but not at all a bad kisser. Why, he had to be good. They had done it many, many times. Why couldn’t she do it right now? Why did this woman, who had only known her Nate—what?—a year? Less? Why did she get to claim the boy Dani had loved her entire life? Why couldn’t she just take a few steps forward, put her arms around his neck, and pull him in for a kiss?

  Nate looked for a moment as if he might not resist it. Then, he suddenly looked up, and Dani heard laughter.

  “There you are,” Anya sang out. Sawyer and Ruth were at the far end of the pier, but Anya was running toward them at a sprint. It was as if she knew another woman had been about to kiss her fiancé. Anya grabbed Nate’s hand. “Come. Let’s have a photo in front of the swans.” She began to pull Nate along the pier. Dani didn’t realize she was holding her breath until Nate looked back. She waited to feel that spark. A rush of warmth, anything, as Anya pulled him away. She held a smile until she felt someone concentrating on her. She looked up to see Sawyer watching her. He didn’t look happy. And it made her feel ashamed. And then angry. This was her life. Her future at stake.

  “If you can’t say anything nice—”

  Sawyer nodded, mimed zipping his lips shut, then took a mock bow. Dani huffed past him. She’d never met someone so infuriating in her entire life. Just when she thought she was out of reach, Sawyer grabbed her arm and swung her around. She slammed into his chest, and before she could think, let alone talk, his lips were crushed on hers, and he was kissing her so hard he took all her breath away. An intense hunger ripped through her, and Danielle began to press harder against Sawyer and really kiss him back. Just as suddenly as he started it, he stopped. He stepped back and gently pushed her away as if she had made an unwanted advance on him.

  “What was that?” she said, trying to sound offended, even though inside she was reeling. She had no idea a kiss could literally make her dizzy.

  “The Ghost of Christmas Present,” he said. “Just thought you two should meet. Before you do something incredibly stupid. Something you can never take back.” There it was again, that intense look, almost a warning. I like you. I’m right here. But if you go after Nate too hard, you’re going to lose me.

  “Fine,” Danielle said.

  “Fine,” Sawyer said.

  This time he let Danielle stalk away. She just prayed it wasn’t obvious as she tried to walk a straight line that she was shaking. Absolutely vibrating from head to toe.

  Chapter 9

  “A sailboat? Nonsense,” Ruth said. “You’ll stay with me.” They were standing by their prospective cars outside Airlee Gardens. It felt odd to Dani that she would be getting into a rental car and driving herself back to a sailboat instead of getting in Ruth Hathaway’s Mercedes with Nate. Ruth, to everyone’s surprise, loved to drive. She was putting on her black driving gloves as she spoke. She never got in her car without them. Nate would be in the passenger seat with Anya all alone in the back. That used to be Dani’s place. And it used to drive her crazy. She and Nate used to get in little arguments about it. Why can’t you sit in the back with me?

  Because then my grandmother would feel like a chauffeur!

  But I feel like a child with my parents riding up front! She wondered if Anya minded. For once it was nice to note something that she didn’t have to put up with anymore. And not only that—she couldn’t get her mind off Sawyer and that kiss. And how she wanted to do it again. Strictly as a point of research. She’d never had a kiss that electric. Her curious mind wanted to know if it would happen again. She just wanted to see whether or not it was a fluke.

  “Did you hear me?” Ruth said to Dani. “You’re staying with me.”

 
“But you said the guest rooms were getting made over, Nanna,” Nate said to his grandmother.

  “I did?”

  “And that’s why Anya’s parents couldn’t stay with you?” Nate gazed intently at her.

  “Oh yes. I did.” She turned to Anya with an apologetic smile. It looked extremely pained.

  The reporter in Dani kicked in as she watched the exchange, fascinated. Ruth had turned away Anya’s parents. She suddenly felt ashamed for using the British stuff against Anya. Sawyer was right. It was prejudice, plain and simple. And Dani couldn’t remember Nate ever correcting his grandmother. He didn’t want Anya’s feelings to be hurt, and he was taking Anya’s side. Dani waited for the hurt to come. Strangely, it didn’t. She was actually kind of proud of Nate. “It’s all right,” Dani piped up. “The sailboat is kind of nice. And large. It has several very separate bedrooms.” She glanced at Sawyer. He gave her a sarcastic thumbs-up.

  “Grandmother’s right. It’s not appropriate—” Nate started to say.

  “Appropriate?” Dani said. “In what way?”

  Nate glanced at Sawyer, then looked away. “I can try to find another place for Anya’s parents so you can have your house back,” he said.

  “But they checked into every option,” Anya said. “And they’re settled in the house.”

  Dani put her hand on Anya’s arm. “Of course they are,” she said. She turned to Nate. “I’m telling you, I’m fine on the boat.” Nate didn’t get to marry Anya and get jealous over Dani!

  Ruth stepped in again. Apparently, she didn’t like Dani with Sawyer, either. “It’s just that I think the maintenance on the rooms may be finished. I didn’t have the room ready for a couple, but I think I can squeeze in little Danielle. Why she takes up no space at all. And she’s hardly a guest, she’s more like family.” Ruth held her arms toward Dani as if she was going to rush into them.

  “Actually. Staying on a boat is part of the article,” Dani said. “It offers a unique perspective.”