A Bride for Hamilton

by Wendy May Andrews

  Hamilton’s gaze seemed to scour her face before he turned back toward Mr. Delaney. “To be honest, we arrived unannounced and were wondering if we ought not to stay considering Abigail is so sick.”

  “She’s not all that sick, I don’t think. Hannah is just a little frazzled with juggling the baby with the rest. Is that why you’re out here?”

  Sadie finally spoke up. “Hamilton was just giving me a tour in order to allow Hannah a few minutes to prepare a little.”

  Ransom’s eyebrows rose. “I didn’t realize he had such tact in him.”

  Hamilton laughed and thumped his friend on the back. “I don’t. That’s why I have a wife.”

  Ransom stepped closer to Sadie, taking her arm. “Well, we’re honored to have you visit us, Sadie. You’ll have your hands full with this one, I’m sure. Now, if I know my wife, she’s probably standing at a window wondering what has become of all of us. Let’s go in and have some tea.”

  Whether she was watching from a window or not, Sadie wasn’t to know, but when they went in, Hannah was indeed ready for visitors.

  “Welcome, welcome, I’m thrilled to have you here. Thank you for coming to visit us.”

  Sadie could smell something sweet baking in the oven and saw steam coming from the kettle. Their hostess had clearly been busy while they had been exploring in the barn. Sadie smiled her thanks to the other woman.

  The evening passed quickly with the three friends catching up. Sadie enjoyed listening to them but had little to share herself. She also very much enjoyed getting to know Hannah’s young brother and sister as well as Ransom’s cute little niece. She was grateful the Delaneys didn’t pry into her background beyond exclaiming over her friendship with Fredericksburgs. Before long, Sadie was surprised by a large yawn that she tried to stifle.

  “Oh, silly me, I was so caught up with visiting that I haven’t even shown you to your room. With your travels today, you must be very tired.”

  In that moment, Sadie realized the awkward situation they were about to encounter, and her gaze flew toward Hamilton. He frowned at her, and she made every effort to stifle her discomfort, simply following Hannah up the stairs to a nicely appointed guest room.

  “This is the only room in the house that is somewhat unscathed by the children. I hope you’ll be able to make yourself comfortable here. Please, let me know if you have need of anything at all.”

  “Thank you so much, Mrs. Delaney, you’ve been more than hospitable.”

  “Please, let’s be friends. You must call me Hannah, and I will call you Sadie.”

  “I’d like that, thank you,” Sadie answered quietly as her hostess slipped from the room, closing the door quietly behind her. Sadie was left standing in the middle of the room gripping her small satchel tightly, wondering what she ought to do with herself.

  There was only one bed. It was quite a large bed. But since she had never shared a bed with her husband, she was beyond uncomfortable. Looking around the tidy room, Sadie wondered if she could make a spot for herself on the floor. After forcing her limbs from the temporarily paralyzed state, she discovered there were extra blankets in a trunk at the foot of the bed.

  When Hamilton stepped into the room, he remained by the door and watched her pile the bedding into the corner of the room. Sadie could feel his steady gaze and wanted to squirm but managed to quell the impulse.

  Finally stepping closer, Hamilton quietly said, “Thank you for making a bed for me.”

  Sadie recoiled. “This isn’t for you. I wouldn’t expect you to take the floor. I didn’t mean to –“ She stammered to a halt when he put his hand gently on her arm.

  “I completely understand. Don’t worry about it. I should have thought about this when I so impulsively decided to visit my friends. It wasn’t well done of me on many counts.”

  Sadie opened her mouth to contradict him but nothing came out. She simply didn’t know what to say.

  “Go to sleep, Sadie. It has been a long day. I can see you worrying behind your small smile. I promise you, this will be far more comfortable than many of the times I’ve slept outdoors while out with the cattle. So, thank you for piling so many blankets down for me.”

  Sadie was struggling with what was best to do when she heard Hamilton’s sigh. “Go to bed, Sadie. There’s nothing to be gained from worrying about it now, I promise you. This isn’t your fault. We both need to sleep.” Without looking at her, he flipped back one of the blankets and lay down without removing any of his clothing. “Please, don’t forget to blow out the candle before you get into bed.”

  Blinking at him, Sadie felt as though she were being remarkably dull-witted. There was nothing to be done. She couldn’t argue with him over the bed. He was already lying down. She just needed to get on with the process of sleeping. It was nighttime, and she would need her energy the next day. There was nothing she could do but blow out the candle, crawl into bed, and hope for oblivion to claim her. She was tired enough after the long day in the buck wagon that she expected to fall instantly asleep.

  It wasn’t quite instantaneous. For one thing, except for the few times she had been unable to buy coal in the dead of winter, she had never slept in all her clothes. It was awkward to say the least. Finally, after struggling to find a comfortable position, she realized it was ridiculous and quietly removed her top layer of clothing. She would be covered by blankets and was wearing several layers. Besides, she was married to the man. If he saw her ankles, surely they would both survive the experience. The smile that accompanied that thought allowed her to relax enough to finally fall asleep. The next thing she knew, sunlight was pouring through the window. She had slept through the night.

  The night before she had forgotten to draw the curtains, which was why the light had awoken her. It wasn’t so very bright, so Sadie was assured that it wasn’t very late. She could be downstairs helping their hostess before anyone even realized the awkward sleeping arrangements she and Hamilton had endured.

  She shouldn’t actually say endured, even in her mind. The bed had been exceptionally comfortable. Sadie really couldn’t complain. She ought to feel sorry for Hamilton for taking the floor. But the fact that he was still asleep led her to believe that perhaps he wasn’t so terribly uncomfortable. Or maybe, her conscience made her realize, he was still asleep because he had been too uncomfortable to sleep deeply until exhaustion finally pulled him under. That was far more likely.

  Sadie tried to ignore her guilty conscience and hurried down the stairs.

  Chapter Eight

  Hamilton opened his eyes and stretched. As soon as he had heard Sadie rustling around he had frozen and feigned sleep, not wanting to make the poor woman even more uncomfortable than she already was. It had been nearly impossible to keep his breathing steady and his body still, as he felt her watchful gaze upon him while she debated what to do.

  He had been relieved the night before when he had finally heard her settle into sleep. It had been strangely restful having another person in the room, not something he had expected at all. He hadn’t shared a room since childhood, but despite how many secrets he was keeping from her, he found Sadie’s company restful. Almost as soon as she had stopped fidgeting and fallen asleep, he had, too. And then he had slept deeper than he had since his wife had arrived in Nebraska.

  Giving his head a shake, Hamilton climbed to his feet, stretching out the kinks in his muscles. While he hadn’t lied when he told Sadie that the floor with all the blankets was slightly more comfortable than sleeping outdoors on the range, that wasn’t really saying much. He liked his creature comforts and would look forward to returning home to his soft bed. But they would have to stay with Delaneys for at least one more night or his friends would take offence.

  As it was, they stayed several nights, since Hannah and Sadie hit it off, as Hamilton had known they would. Sadie was happily making preserves and helping Hannah prepare for the coming winter. And they hadn’t even caught whatever had been ailing Abigail, despite Sadie’s worrie
s.

  “How do you know all these things?” Hamilton heard Hannah marveling. “You are so much better prepared for life out here than I ever was.”

  Sadie’s tinkling laugh made Hamilton’s breath catch, despite the conversation he was in with Ransom.

  “Not all of us grew up with servants, Hannah,” she had said without a trace of discomfort in her voice. Hamilton was surprised to hear them both dissolving into laughter before he was reabsorbed into his own conversation. He felt a catch in his throat as he was once again reminded that not all beautiful women were like his mother. He really ought to wrap his head around that and resolve his resistance toward his wife.

  After the first night, Sadie had seemed to accept that he was going to sleep on the floor, but she piled more and more blankets into the creation of his bed each night. It had been a source of amusement for Hamilton each time he entered the room to see his bed appearing taller than the night before. He wasn’t even sure how Sadie managed it so quickly as she was also always burrowed under her own covers by the time he entered the room, appearing to be fast asleep, which he knew was a ruse. He was relieved to note, though, that her breathing smoothed out into the rhythm of sleep within minutes of his entry to the room. If he were being fanciful he would almost think she found his presence comforting. At least his arrival didn’t prevent her from sleep.

  “My wife sure is enjoying your wife’s company, Hamilton.” Ransom’s comment made Hamilton’s chest puff up with pride. “She seems like a good woman. But you seem a bit off.” The other man laughed when Hamilton scowled at him. “I know, I’m turning into a woman. But Hannah has taught me that feelings aren’t the dreadful things I once thought they were. Do you want to talk about what’s going on with you?”

  “No, I do not,” Hamilton sputtered.

  Ransom slapped him on the back and chuckled. “That’s good. I didn’t really want to either, but I know enough to figure I ought to at least ask.”

  Hamilton allowed the moment to pass but he couldn’t get it out of his mind the entire time they were visiting with Delaneys. While Sadie seemed to be thriving under the attention of a new friend, Hamilton watched and marveled. Ransom was right. His wife was a good woman. And he had been doing nothing but ignoring her just because she was beautiful like his mother. But Sadie was nothing like his mother had been. It was unfair of him to paint her with the same brush. Sadie had been loyal to her family and her debts. Hamilton could trust that she would be loyal to him. And he knew beyond any doubt that she would never leave a child of hers behind like his mother had. It had been foolish of him to judge her so harshly just because she was so pretty. He ought to have known that beauty was only skin deep. What Sadie had came from her core.

  When Sadie had shown Hannah, Maryanne, and Francine how to make jam, Hannah had begged that they stay a few more days so they could learn even more things from Sadie. Hamilton had frowned over the wind he heard howling outside but reluctantly agreed to stay a little longer.

  “We have to be mindful of the potential for a turn in the weather. But it shouldn’t hurt to stay a little bit longer.” When he had seen how happy Sadie seemed to be at the prospect of more days with the others, he was comfortable with his decision.

  Despite the extra days, before he realized it, the visit had flown by and he found himself once more in the wagon with Sadie bundled up beside him, a contented smile upon her face.

  “That was far more enjoyable than I expected it to be when we first arrived,” she said, as they pulled around a corner and could no longer see the Delaneys waving to them from their front porch.

  Hamilton laughed. “Me, too. I’m sorry for bringing you into such an awkward situation. It was certainly not my intention when we set out for this visit.”

  “Of course, not,” Sadie agreed promptly. “Who in their right mind would go looking for awkwardness?”

  Hamilton laughed. “But you did enjoy the visit, didn’t you?”

  “Very much so,” Sadie agreed immediately before adding with an impish smile, “Although I will now have to keep our house always in readiness for guests, as they assured us they would visit us in turn. I’m sure they’ll be arriving without warning just as we did.”

  “I’m not so sure. They are a much more cumbersome package being a family of six. They aren’t likely to set out without full assurance that we’ll be ready for them.”

  Sadie hummed. Hamilton wasn’t sure if it was in agreement or not so he didn’t pursue the matter. He was happy to allow silence to rise up between them. It wasn’t the uncomfortable quiet that had kept them company on the drive there. At least, not at first. But then, after a mile or two he realized Sadie was deep in troubled thoughts.

  “Are you worrying again?” he asked with a chuckle.

  She shrugged, clearly not wanting to discuss her thoughts with him. But a few moments later she surprised him with her question.

  “When will you be leaving for California?”

  “I beg your pardon?” Hamilton was shocked. He had heard her clearly but couldn’t wrap his mind around her words. He had never mentioned California to her before.

  “Hannah told me how lucky I am that your other businesses are in California instead of Oregon like Ransom’s. She was concerned, though, that the vastness of your empire might require a great deal of your time, and you might get stuck there for the winter, since you haven’t left yet on your usual trip to check on things.”

  Hamilton wanted to curse out his frustrations but managed to contain his anger, not even transferring his thoughts to the horses via the reins. But it was a struggle.

  “What else did she say?” He tried to sound merely interested, but his feelings must have conveyed themselves to her. Despite the fact that she seemed upset with him, she now looked concerned over his rising anger.

  Sadie shrugged. “She didn’t say much else aside from mentioning that she was surprised you had gotten married, as she suspected you might not want children due to your anger towards your own mother. I think she felt bad for embarrassing me with the fact that she knew so much more about your circumstances than I do.”

  “I’ve been friends with Ransom for ten years. He’s obviously told her things.”

  A bitter laugh came from the sweet woman beside him. It sounded strange coming from her. “Yes, I’ve heard some husbands do that.”

  He deserved her sarcasm, even if it sat oddly on her.

  “I’d like to walk for a while, please.”

  “No, Sadie, it’s too cold,” he protested.

  “Walking will warm me up, I’m sure,” she insisted.

  “It’s a bad idea, Sadie. But if you really insist, the horses are about due for a rest. You can walk a ways ahead of us while I let them have a little break. I’ll catch up to you. Hopefully you’ll be ready to see reason by then.” Hamilton was angry that she was kicking up a fuss about what he hadn’t told her, so he didn’t ague any further with her, merely watching silently as she started walking down the road without a backward glance.

  ~~~

  Sadie stomped along beside the road, her anger and disappointment chasing each other around in her mind while her puffs of breath created clouds in the cold air in front of her face. Within minutes, her nose and cheeks became chilled and she became aware of the darkening sky. She was being ridiculous. Hamilton hadn’t lied to her. She had never thought to ask him about other businesses. The fact that he hadn’t volunteered the information meant he was private, not necessarily a liar. And as they had frequently admitted to each other, they were still getting to know each other. Strangers, even though Sadie hadn’t considered him a stranger since the first week.

  It wasn’t Hamilton’s fault that she had allowed her heart to become involved. She hadn’t meant to. Sadie had tried to remain aloof from him, refusing to acknowledge that she was growing to care for him. But whether she admitted it or not, her heart wasn’t meant for a solitary existence. She had grown fond of her husband. Maybe even more than fond. Which was
probably why she had been so deeply embarrassed to realize he had kept such big secrets from her. She had told him every detail of her life, and he hadn’t trusted her with his own.

  Her humiliation had made her angry. And now, here she was walking down a dirt road in the middle of Nebraska with no real idea of where she was and not a single living soul within sight or earshot. Sadie admitted to herself that she was a fool. She only hoped Hamilton didn’t stay angry with her and would come along to collect her before too much longer.

  She walked and walked. It felt like she was walking for hours, but she had no way to really judge. The sky had grown darker, and now flakes of snow were swirling in the cold air and accumulating on the road in front of her. It wasn’t too hard to walk yet, but she was growing more and more concerned. She would have thought Hamilton would have reached her long ago. The horses wouldn’t have needed to rest for very long. It wasn’t as though the wagon was laden down with heavy burdens. Surely her husband’s anger wouldn’t have made him dally and leave her walking alone longer than necessary. Not that it was necessary, Sadie reminded herself. She was the one who had stomped off on her own into the great yonder.

  Her heart constricted as she realized the truth. Somehow she had gotten herself lost. In the middle of Nebraska. In an early snowstorm. And she knew nothing about survival.

  That’s not true, she told herself. You know plenty about survival. You’ve survived all that life has thrown you up until now, surely you can figure out a little bit of cold and snow.

  The encouraging thoughts bolstered her courage for a while, but soon she was dragging her feet once more. She didn’t know if she ought to keep walking or if she should try to build herself some sort of nest in the snow. Sadie had once read a book about how animals did that to survive the harsh weather. If it worked for the animals, surely it would work for her.

  ~~~

  Hamilton was going hoarse from yelling Sadie’s name. Fear had him firmly in its grip. He was the worst sort of fool for having allowed her to walk off on her own. He had lost her. In a snowstorm. He was frantic with worry, and there was no way of getting help. From what he recalled, the next village was several miles away. And with the gathering darkness, if he didn’t find her soon, getting others wasn’t going to be of any help to his wife if she was a frozen block of ice.