by Ann Rinaldi
"I'm going with you. I'll be there," she said.
Her words comforted me and I stopped crying. "I hate him," I said.
"Do whatever makes you feel better."
Of a sudden we heard voices from across the hall. Teddy, talking angrily. We looked at each other and went to the doorway of the dining room, where we hid behind it to listen.
"If Garrard thinks ... if that low-down, womanizing chigger thinks that I'm just going to hand my sister over on his say-so, he's crazier than a skunk in daylight."
"What will you do?" Carol was asking.
Viola and I looked at each other. She winked at me and smiled. She was about to say something when there was a knock on the door.
Teddy came out of his study to answer it.
There stood a Yankee soldier. "I'm Lieutenant Darius Livermore of General Garrard's staff, sir. Are you Mr. Conners?"
Teddy replied that yes, indeed he was.
"The general requests the honor of a meeting with you at ten thirty this morning at his headquarters in Barrington Hall. May I have the courtesy of a reply?"
"Tell the general I will be there."
The lieutenant saluted and left.
To Viola's and my surprise, Teddy was already dressed for such a meeting. And he had some papers ready for it. "Hand me my portfolio," he requested of Carol.
In the next minute he yelled, "Leigh Ann!"
"Yes?"
"You can come out into the open now. I know you've been listening. Come across the hall."
I did so.
He stood there with his portfolio in his hands. He looked at me appraisingly. "Go and put on a different dress. Something churchy but plain. No frills. You have ten minutes."
I ran upstairs. As I did so, I heard Viola asking him if she could go, too. He said no, this wasn't the time. If he lost this battle with Garrard, that would be the time.
Primus drove us in the carriage. Teddy would have it no other way.
We passed the skeleton of the burned mill, only the brick walls remaining, smoke still rising, like out of a dying dream.
Teddy would not look at the spectacle.
The town was full of men in blue uniforms, cavalry troops and horses, wagons raising dust, federal flags flying from posts, women carrying carpetbags and being ushered along by Yankees with drawn bayonets to the town square.
There stood what seemed like hundreds of women and children, all waiting in the heat, unsheltered. Children were crying. Soldiers guarded them with guns.
When we pulled up in front of Barrington Hall, Teddy, who had not uttered a word all the way, spoke finally.
"When we go in here, keep quiet, unless Garrard speaks to you. Then be polite. No sass. You hear me?"
"Yes, Teddy."
"Tell the truth. If you've got any decent reason why you did what you did, in God's name, tell him. You never did tell me."
"I —"
"No, I don't want to know now. It's too late. Just help yourself, however you can. Now let's go. Oh, one last thing. Mother will likely be in there. He and she have something going. Please don't let either of them know we haven't been getting on and we're ready to kill each other."
It tore at my heart, his saying that.
We got out of the carriage and walked past the guards in front. The house had five enormous pillars and there were more guards at the door. We were ushered in and down the wide hall to a commodious room with highly polished floors and all the accouterments of wealth and power.
We were announced by the same lieutenant who had come to our house earlier.
General Garrard was seated behind a large desk covered with papers. If he stood, he would be tall. His hat was off and his hair was sandy. His beard was full. I did not like men who wore full beards.
Major McCoy had told us Garrard was a West Point graduate. Teddy had once said you didn't fool around with West Point graduates, because they were all fools. Couldn't think beyond what those gray walls had taught them, Teddy said.
Garrard had gray eyes and I did not like gray eyes, either. They could not make up their mind what they wanted to be, like brown or blue ones could, but kept you speculating.
Major McCoy stood next to a fireplace. And my mother was there, seated in a Victorian-style chair, her taffeta skirts billowing about her as she sipped a glass of something red and sparkling. She smiled wickedly when we came in.
Major McCoy introduced Teddy to the general, whose only acknowledgment was a nod of the head and a gesture that my brother should sit on the couch.
"And his sister Leigh Ann," the major finished.
The general's eyes went over me. "Ah," he said. "The young lady who walks on roofs."
I curtsied.
He smiled, approvingly, and pointed to the couch.
I sat next to Teddy.
"Of course, you need no introduction to this lady," Garrard said.
Teddy poked me in the ribs.
"Hello, Mother," I murmured.
"You're growing up, Leigh Ann." She looked at Teddy.
My brother stood briefly and gave a short bow. "How are you, ma'am?" he inquired.
"Quite well, Teddy, thank you."
"Now, as to the matter at hand," Garrard began briskly. "As I understand it, you are here, Mr. Conners, to plead your sister's case, she being under arrest for her part in the conspiracy of the French flag, as we have come to call it. That flag was put on the roof of the mill to lead us to think that said mill was under neutral ownership and as such could not be destroyed. Am I correct?"
"Mr. Roche owns fifty percent of the mill," Teddy informed him. "I have papers here stating such."
"Fifty percent is not total ownership. And such papers were likely drawn up in anticipation of our arrival. And so you sent your sister up on the roof to plant the French flag. Involving her in the conspiracy."
"I did not send her up there," Teddy said evenly. "I would not do such a thing."
Garrard looked at me. "Then why did you go up, young lady?"
"Because she's a brat," Mother put in.
Garrard rolled his eyes. "Please, love," he said. Then he looked at me again. "Well?"
I drew in my breath, then let it out again. Everyone was looking at me. "Because I haven't been very nice lately," I told him. "I've been bad. I've been giving my brother a powerful lot of trouble. So when Mr. Roche said he was afraid to go up on the roof to plant the flag because he's scared of heights, I offered to do it."
Everybody was still staring at me. "I didn't tell anybody. Especially not Teddy. Jon told him, the boy who cares for my pa. And Teddy came and got me down and he was mad as all get-out."
Still nobody said anything. I went on. "I did it because I wanted to make things up to my brother. I wanted to make him proud of me."
Silence, pure and thick, so thick you could pour it. From his position by the fireplace, McCoy was looking at me, and I thought I saw tears welling in his eyes.
Garrard was eyeing me, too. "You got yourself in a lot of trouble there, missy."
I nodded my head. "Yessir, I know."
"You love your brother that much, eh?"
I did not answer.
"Ofcourse she does," Mother answered. "Why shouldn't she? He allows her to run free. He never disciplines her. If she were in my care, which she should be, she'd never attempt such a thing."
"Why isn't she in your care?" Garrard asked.
"She was taken away from me. I was deemed not a fit mother."
"Well"—and Garrard gave a short laugh—"recalling the last few days, love, I'd call you anything but a fit mother. You got papers to prove you're legally in charge of her, Conners?"
"Yes," Teddy answered. "Got them right here, too."
Garrard waved his hand. "Never mind. I believe you. Nevertheless, they won't do a damned thing to prevent her arrest, or my sending her on to Marietta. I've got orders from General Sherman to arrest all connected with the mill as traitors and send them north. The men will be sent right to prison. C
an't disobey orders. Sorry, Conners. You were in the army. Heard you were a hero at First Manassas. Surely you understand about obeying orders."
"Sir." It was Major McCoy.
"Yes, McCoy."
"Respectfully, sir."
"Go ahead."
"The child's motivation was pure, sir. She had no knowledge of a conspiracy. And then there's this, sir, if Mr. Conners will forgive me. She's a, well, a downright beautiful girl, sir. There will be all kinds of soldiers who haven't seen women in a while on that march. It'd be like sending a lamb to slaughter."
"You're letting your emotions get in the way of your thinking, McCoy. What in hell are you thinking, anyway?"
"Afraid I was thinking of my own little sister, sir."
"Yeah, well, there will be a lot of other women on that march, too. And girls younger than she is. Why is this one any different?"
"She's from an esteemed family, sir, if I may. Refined and innocent."
"So what do you want me to do? Let her off the hook?"
"No, sir. But I have an idea. Respectfully."
"Let's have it, McCoy. Respectfully."
"Make her a bummer, sir."
"A bummer? Are you crazy?"
"It'll save her, sir. Put her in boys' clothing. Give her to Mulholland. Don't let him know she's a girl."
"Bummers forage," Teddy said.
"Does she know how to shoot a gun?" Garrard asked.
"Yes," Teddy answered. "I taught her."
"Somebody could ask me. I'm right here," I put in.
"Quiet," Teddy ordered. "Don't be disrespectful."
"Kid's got sand," Garrard said. "I like that."
"You taught her to shoot a gun?" Mother flung at him. "I won't have it. She's my child. I simply won't have it. Kenner, I'll let her go on the march, but I want her sent on to New York to this private boarding school where I always wanted her to go, where she will learn true Yankee values and get her away from these decrepit Southern ways."
"What's the name of it?" Garrard asked.
Mother told him.
"What? And lose her sand? No, sorry, love. Even if I wanted to accommodate you, once these women and children leave Marietta, I'm finished with them. I can't be concerned with individual destinations."
"Not even after all I've done for you?" Mother actually purred it. In front of everybody.
I was ashamed of her.
Garrard softened. "Why don't we let the little girl decide. Well, what's it to be, missy? You want to go on the march as a bummer? And take your chances that someday you may come back and see your brother again? Or you want to be cared for special on the march, by my orders, and shipped on to New York to a nice boarding school and be safe, then come back to your mother?"
There was no decision to make.
"I'll take my chances and be a bummer and make it home to be with my brother," I said.
The meeting was over.
We stood up to leave. We were dismissed. Crestfallen was not the word for what Teddy was. He had lost, and he was not good at losing.
"I'll see them out, sir," McCoy said.
Garrard just waved him off.
On the verandah, McCoy shook Teddy's hand again. "Sorry," he said.
"Thanks for your help," my brother told him.
"She'll be all right. Like Garrard said, she's got sand. Boys' clothes will help. She's a dear little thing."
McCoy looked at me. "Escape any chance you get. Steal a horse. These soldiers are drunk most of the time."
"Yessir."
He reached into his pocket and took out two ten-dollar gold eagles and a compass, held them in his open hand, looked at Teddy for permission, and, receiving a nod from my brother, gave them to me. "Travel off the beaten path," he told me. "And God bless you."
Then he leaned down and kissed my forehead and went back inside.
Teddy was just helping me into the carriage when Mother came out.
"You think you won again, don't you?" she lashed at him. "Because she chose you over me?"
Teddy said nothing.
"Well, you didn't. I've got one more card to play, Teddy boy. And let me tell you. You're going to be sorry this time, you are. Wait and see. Just wait and see."
We did not talk again, all the way home.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Viola and I worked the rest of that day, making over Teddy's and Louis's old trousers and shirts to fit me.
Careen helped. We got the clothes down from the attic and set up shop in the back parlor. The size of the outfits indicated they were from when my brothers were about thirteen or fourteen.
Careen cut and I measured and we all did the sewing. We found suspenders and old hats, too. And even boots. By afternoon we had two outfits.
We even found boys' underwear.
"Do I have to wear these?" I held up the small clothes.
"You'd best," Viola advised. "Just in case push comes to shove."
"Well, I'm sure glad I didn't get my woman's time of the month yet."
It had been a source of embarrassment to me at first, that I hadn't yet gotten it. But then Viola told me she hadn't gotten hers until she was fifteen. Now I considered myself blessed. I had just turned fourteen. God was good to me.
And then, just before supper, when I was upstairs washing up and Viola and Carol were napping, a carriage pulled up in front, a fancy carriage.
Mother's carriage.
Her footman opened the door. She got out, came up the verandah steps, and pounded the door knocker.
Cannice answered.
I stood at the top of the stairs.
"I have come to see my son," she said. "Is he here?"
"He's in his study, ma'am," Cannice said.
Mother pushed her way into the hall and into Teddy's study. She did not bother closing the door all the way.
I crept downstairs and listened outside.
"What's this I hear about you sending around a note to Garrard asking him to let Viola go along on the march?"
"If it's any of your business, she wants to go to look after Leigh Ann."
"I told him you were sending her because she's pregnant. And not married. And a disgrace to the family. So he's going to let her go."
I could see through the door, which was ajar, Teddy standing behind his desk holding an open newspaper. And Mother holding her riding whip.
"How dare you say such," Teddy said with contempt.
"I'll say what I please."
"You were in the family way with Louis a few months before you married Pa, I'm given to understand. How could you demean your daughter so?"
"She's not your concern!" Mother screamed at him.
Teddy said she was, as much as I was, especially now that she'd taken up with that Garrard popinjay who was addicted to liquor and women.
She called Teddy a no-count rogue.
He called her a Northern witch.
At which juncture she raised her riding crop and swung it expertly.
It hit his shoulder, ripping his shirt, then continued on its journey to the side of his face, slashing it.
He laughed, though it made his shoulder and face bleed.
At that point I burst through the door and ran toward her. "Don't you dare," I screamed. I took her unawares and, doing so, wrested the riding crop from her and threw it across the room. "Don't you dare come in here and treat Teddy like that. You have no right. You left us! You don't care about any of us! You have no right!"
I was bawling, unashamedly. I began to hit her with both my hands.
"Leigh Ann!" Teddy came out from behind his desk and seized me. I fought him, but he got both my hands behind me and secured my wrists until they hurt.
I was sobbing.
Mother held her face where I'd hit her. "So this is the kind of child you're raising. The kind that hits her mother."
Still holding my wrists, Teddy said, "Apologize to your mother."
"I won't."
He gave me a couple of shakes. "Do as I say
, for God's sake." There was pleading in his voice, even a hint of desperation.
I knew I had to, for his sake. But by all the gods above, I did not want to.
"I'm sorry," I said.
Teddy released me. "Now go. Get out of here."
"Can I just say one thing? Please?"
Teddy closed his eyes. That was my answer.
"Viola is married," I told my mother. "Her husband was killed at Richmond. And Major McCoy knows it. It's in his records. And if he knows it, General Garrard knows it."
I looked at Teddy. He nodded his head approvingly. His face was bleeding. I curtsied to my mother and left the room.
***
That night I'd just put myself to bed when there was a knock on my door and Teddy came in.
"Get dressed in your boys' clothes and come out back," he said. That was all.
I did so, quickly. What was going on? Anything,, I told myself. Anything might be going on. Was he going to sneak me away?
The house was quiet, and something warned me to be quiet, too. I sneaked out the back door, deciding whether to take one of the many lanterns that were at the ready there. But I did not need one. The moon was full and cast a light as clear as day.
Sure enough, a distance away from the house, down by the grape arbor, there were two figures waiting. I crept through the already dew-wet grass toward them.
Viola and Teddy.
Teddy held a lantern. He had a plaster on his face where Mother had hit him.
Viola held a pair of scissors and a comb in one hand and a hand mirror in the other.
Between them was a chair.
I stopped a few feet from them. "No," I said. "No, Teddy, please. I'm sorry I've been naughty. I'm sorry I hit Mother."
"Sit down in the chair, please," he said quietly. "Viola is tired and needs to go to bed."
I stood rigid.
He came over and took me gently by the arm and sat me down in the chair.
"This could save your life, honey," Viola told me. "We have to do it. It isn't on account of anything you did. Teddy wouldn't punish you this way. It'll grow back, prettier than ever. Sometimes, especially in this heat, I wish I could cut mine."
I sat in a daze. Viola undid the braid that I put my hair in at night and combed out my long, curly hair. Tears came quietly down my face.
Teddy stood next to her with the lantern so she would have good light.
