When Forever Changes

by Siobhan Davis

  “What the fuck was that all about back at the house?” he asks while we lean against the side of Slater’s SUV.

  “Fucked if I know. I can’t believe Dylan said something so crass. And in front of everyone too.”

  “It’s weird. I’ve never known Dylan to act like that.” He turns around so he’s facing me. “Did something happen between him and Slate?”

  My brow puckers. “Like what?”

  He shrugs. “I don’t know, but the last couple times we’ve all been together, I’ve sensed some serious tension between them.”

  “That’s not really anything new. They’ve never been close.”

  “It’s more than that. I just thought Dylan might’ve said something to you.”

  “He hasn’t, but you can bet after that outburst I’m going to ask.”

  “Ask who what?” Slater inquires, rounding the front of the car.

  I blurt out the first thing I can think of. “Myndi. What she sees in this guy.” I poke my finger in Ryan’s chest, smirking. A split second later, my eyes pop wide when he flushes a little. I push off the car, straightening up as I scrutinize his face. “Hang on here a second! Did something happen between you two?”

  He rubs the back of his neck, looking a little sheepish. “Did you not speak to her today?”

  I shake my head. “She called when I was in the kitchen helping Mom serve up dinner, and I didn’t have time to answer. What’s going on?”

  His lips pull into a smug grin, and I slap his chest. “You. Did. Not!”

  “Jeez, baby sis. Why are you so aggressive all the time? I think you need to get laid more often. Work out some of that anger.”

  “I get laid at least once a day, thank you very much.”

  Both Slater and Ryan pale. “Now I seriously want to ram my fist in Dylan’s face,” my brother says.

  “Join the club,” Slater mumbles, and my good humor fades.

  I touch his arm. “I’m so sorry for what Dylan said. He was way out of line, and I know he didn’t mean it.”

  Slater snorts. “Oh, I think he meant it all right.” Opening the driver-side door, he hauls his ass into the car before I can respond. Ryan sends me an “I told you so” look before sliding into the passenger seat beside him. I tap on Slater’s window, and he rolls it down. “And you shouldn’t be apologizing on his behalf,” he adds before I can get a word in. “It’s not your fault your boyfriend’s a fucking douche.”

  Whoa. “Okay. Enough.” I cross my arms and eyeball Slater. “What exactly is going on? Did something happen with you and Dylan ’cause you’re both snarking at one another all the time and I’m getting sick of it.”

  “Ask your boyfriend,” he grumbles, turning the key in the ignition.

  “I’m asking you.”

  He shakes his head. “You need to ask Dylan.”

  His voice brokers no argument, so I give up protesting. “Fine. I will.” A conflicted look washes over his face, and an uneasy feeling settles in my gut, but I force it aside for now. “I have something for you. Well, it’s for your mom’s garden, actually. Could I meet you back at the house?”

  His eyes probe mine. “I was going to head back to the city, but we can make a quick detour at the house.”

  “Okay, cool. I’ll meet you guys there.”

  I trail them to Slater’s house and park behind his SUV in the driveway. I’m glad I thought to take the shrub from Dylan’s truck before I left my parents’ house. My cell pings from inside my bag, and I take it out as a message pops up from my boyfriend. I swipe my finger along the screen and read his text.

  I’m really sorry Dimples. Please come back.

  I’m still furious with him, so he can stew a little longer. Tossing my cell back in my bag, I grab the pot and shimmy out of the car. As I walk toward the guys, Slater’s eyes dart from the plant in my hand to my face. “I thought we could plant a tree in the backyard in memory of your mom,” I explain.

  As he stares at me, unnamed emotion shimmers in his eyes. His Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. His chocolate-brown eyes darken, and his gaze drills into me, as if he’s trying to worm his way inside. A strange fluttery feeling takes up residence in my chest. I want to look away, because the intensity on his face is making me slightly uncomfortable, but it’s as if my eyes are glued to his. Without a word, he takes the pot from me, silently handing it to my brother. Then he pulls me into his embrace, wrapping his strong, muscular arms around me.

  Slater has hugged me before.

  Countless times.

  But this feels different. Different for us. And different from any hug I’ve ever had before. Warmth rolls off him in waves, crashing into me, turning my limbs floppy. I hold onto his waist to steady myself, and my mouth turns dry. My eyes meet Ryan’s over Slater’s shoulder, and he’s deep in thought as he watches us.

  Snapping out of whatever haze I’m in, I extract myself from Slater, clearing my throat. “We’d better get started before nightfall descends. Unless you’d rather plant it alone?”

  Slater’s cheeks are a little flushed, and he won’t meet my eyes as he speaks. “No. Let’s all do it together.”

  I move to walk away, but he gently takes my hand. “Thank you for this, Belle. It’s extremely thoughtful, and you’ve no idea how much this means to me.” His voice cracks a little. “Mom would love it. She loved you so much.”

  Tears instantly well in my eyes. “I loved her too.”

  Another moment passes between us. Then he wets his lips, looking a little nervous. “But, the thing is, I don’t know if I’m going to keep the house, so maybe we should keep it in the pot until I decide.”

  “I’m pretty sure we can dig it up and replant it if we need to.”

  His shoulders relax a little. “Okay, that’s good.”

  My eyes probe his. “I don’t mean to pry, but I’m a little surprised you’re considering letting the house go. I assumed you’d want to keep it. To live in it again after you graduate.”

  Right now, Ryan and Slater live in a four-bed brownstone ten minutes from campus with two other seniors. It’s only three blocks from the condo I share with Dylan.

  “I’m still undecided,” he admits, looking between me and Ryan. “Part of me can’t bear to part with this house, and the idea of some stranger living in it doesn’t sit right with me either. Mom worked her butt off for this house, and I see her in all the little touches, but that’s also part of the problem. It kills me being here without her, and I don’t know if I could live here again on my own.”

  “You won’t always be on your own.”

  He shrugs. “Maybe. Maybe not.”

  Spoken like a true commitment-phobe.

  Slater and Ryan had girlfriends during junior year of high school, but it didn’t last long. Since they moved to UD, they’ve gained quite the rep as party-loving bad boys with a predilection for casual hookups and one-night stands. To my knowledge, neither of them have had a relationship in years, but I’m well aware I’m not privy to the ins and outs of their sex lives. They are not unique in their outlook. Plenty of guys come to college to sow their wild oats and only settle down once they leave and join the real world.

  Which only makes me even more grateful for Dylan and the love we share.

  “You won’t be alone forever,” I tell him confidently, because Slater is a great guy and a great catch, and one day, some lucky girl is going to capture his heart and turn his world on its axis. “And you might feel differently about the house then.” He shoves his hands in his pockets, shrugging again. “Unless you need to make a call on it now, I think you should hold tight for the moment. You’re still grieving, and you might make a decision and then come to regret it. Don’t rush into anything.”

  Surprisingly, he reaches out, cupping one side of my face. “How do you always know the perfect thing to say? You’re so smart and compassio
nate.” His voice lowers, and he peers deep into my eyes. “Don’t ever change, Belle. For no one.”

  A strange sensation sweeps through me.

  It’s difficult to describe.

  It feels a lot like falling, yet I’m soaring at the same time.

  Slater rubs his thumb across my cheek, eliciting a fiery trail of tingles I feel all the way to my toes. My heart starts beating to a new rhythm, and my chest inflates as inexplicable emotion twists my stomach into knots.

  Okay, I’m officially weirded out. Things have just skyrocketed into unchartered territory, and my body is as confused as my head with the visceral reaction to Slater’s soft touch and reverential words. His eyes pierce mine intensely again, and this odd vibe between us alternates somewhere between strange, freaky, and familiar.

  Something real passes between us in this moment, and I veer between elation and guilt.

  Ryan comes to the rescue this time, finally breaking whatever spell we’re under. In a deliberate move, he pulls me away from Slater, circling his arm around my shoulder and tucking me in close to his side. “Come on. Let’s go plant this pretty before it’s dark.”

  So, we do. With everyone ignoring what just transpired.

  Choosing a spot in the backyard is challenging because Janine has most every inch of ground already planted, but we find a spot beside a crab apple tree which is perfect. Not exposed to the elements, but not completely sheltered either.

  All three of us are quiet as we bed the star magnolia plant. When we’re done, we stand and admire our teamwork. We’re in a line, with our arms draped around one another, while we take a moment alone with our thoughts. We may not have a green thumb like Janine did, but, for virtual first-timers, I think we did an admirable job.

  A cough from behind startles all of us. Turning around, I’m surprised to see Dylan standing on the top step, looking out of his comfort zone. “Sorry for barging in, but the front door was unlocked.” He glances at me and then eyeballs Slater. “I was hoping to have a word in private with you.” Ryan and I exchange a loaded look, but we step away, leaving the guys to talk.

  Dylan squeezes my hand as I brush past him, and I squeeze back. It means a lot to me that he’s made the effort to come here and put this right. That’s more like the Dylan I know and love.

  I switch the Keurig on while Ryan pulls up a chair in the kitchen. We don’t talk for a couple minutes. It’s only when I’ve slid a mug of coffee to Ryan that he engages me in conversation. He looks a little awkward, like he’s struggling to find the right words.

  I could help him out, but where would the fun be in that? So, I let him squirm for a couple minutes.

  “Is everything okay with you and Dylan?” he blurts. “I mean, I don’t want any details or anything, but if there’s trouble in paradise, you can talk to me.”

  I smirk. Can’t help it. “You really want to talk boys?” I quirk a brow. “Have you changed personality overnight?” I point between us. “We don’t do this. It’s not our thing.” It’s the one unspoken rule between us, and virtually the only topic that’s off limits.

  “You’re my fucking sister, Tornado. Of course, it’s our thing. I’m here for you, no matter what’s going on in your life.”

  The pissed look on his face sobers me up. I reach across the table and take his hand. “Hey. I was only joking, and I know I can always talk to you, but you don’t need to worry, everything’s fine between me and Dylan.” I smile at him. “He’s still my forever guy.”

  “You sure about that?”

  Alarm bells ding in my head. “Of course, I’m sure! I’ve been hopelessly in love with Dylan for years. He’s my person. That’ll never change.”

  “You were so fucking young when you got with him. Don’t you ever feel like you’re missing out?”

  Now he’s really starting to piss me off. “If you’re referring to the fact I’ll be riding the one cock for life, then no, I don’t feel like I’m missing out.”

  “Fuck’s sake, Gabby. Do you have to be so crude? It’s not very ladylike.”

  I flip him the bird. “In case you’ve forgotten, I grew up with three brothers. Crude is practically our middle name. And I’ve overheard my fair share of your conversations, which are usually way more graphic than my statement, so spare me the ladylike bull unless you want to officially cement your sexist status.”

  He sighs, scrubbing a hand over his chin. “This wasn’t the way I wanted this conversation to go, and I don’t want to argue with you. I love you, baby sis, and I just want you to know I’m here for you. Always. And I’ll always have your back.”

  My bad mood evaporates with his sincere words. My brothers are genuinely the best. Sure, they gave me shit when I was younger, but I have always felt protected and cherished, and there isn’t anything they won’t do for me, or vice versa. And I know I’m lucky, especially where Ryan’s concerned, because we really are a pretty tight unit.

  From the minute I arrived on campus last year, Ryan has looked out for me and actively included me in his life, which a lot of brothers wouldn’t do. And I had Dylan, so it’s not like it was even necessary, but that’s just the way my brother rolls.

  People often ask me if I miss not having a sister, but I can honestly say that it’s never bothered me because I have three awesome brothers who I’ve always been able to confide in. And, with Ryan, we’re as close as any two siblings could be.

  So, no, I do not feel like I’ve missed out.

  I go around the table and hug my brother. “I love you too, little big bro. Sorry for overreacting. I know you care, and I appreciate how you’re always looking out for me, but you don’t need to worry. Dylan and I are solid.”

  Chapter Six

  After dropping Mom’s car home and saying goodbye to the rest of my family, we set off back to the city. Dylan hasn’t said one word to me since we left Slater’s house, and I can’t stand the tense silence anymore. “Do you want to tell me what’s going on with you?” I ask, as he takes the exit onto the highway.

  “What do you mean?” He looks briefly at me before refocusing on the road.

  “That outburst was most unlike you, and I’ve noticed you and Slate snapping at one another a lot lately. If something is going on, I’d like to know.”

  A shuddering breath leaves his lips, and when he glances at me, he looks extremely nervous.

  A heavy weight presses down on my chest, and nausea swims up my throat. “What?” I whisper. “What is it?”

  He drags his lower lip between his teeth and worry lines form on his brow.

  “Dylan. You’re scaring me. What’s going on?”

  He sighs. “Let me pull over and I’ll explain.” Spotting the sign for a gas station up ahead, he pulls off the highway and drives to the place, bringing the truck to a standstill in a vacant parking space. He grips the steering wheel tight, and my heart is hammering against my rib cage as anxiety starts running rampant inside me.

  Unbuckling his seat belt, he turns to face me. “You know I love you to the moon and back and that I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt you, right?”

  Oh God. That sounds like the start of a confession if ever I heard one. My vocal cords refuse to work, so I can only nod. Wiping my suddenly sweaty palms down the front of my dress, I try to prepare my heart. I’ve no idea what Dylan is going to say, only that I’m not going to like it.

  “I was going to tell you this the minute we got home. Swear.” Little drops of moisture cling to his hairline, making me even more anxious. I nod again, seeing the truth in his eyes. “You remember the night we arrived back at the condo after summer break when I went out with Chase and the guys?”

  “Yeah,” I croak, knotting my hands in my lap.

  “We went to the club, and I had a few too many beers.”

  The instant remorseful look on his face causes a sharp ache to spear me straight thr
ough the heart. I think I know what he’s about to say, and it’s going to kill me. Tears leak out of my eyes, and he notices.

  He cups my face and his expression is fierce. “No, no, no. It’s not what you’re thinking, baby. I haven’t cheated on you.”

  His words do little to reassure me. “Then what is it because I feel like I’m having a coronary.”

  He yanks my face to his and smashes his lips against mine. His kiss is frantic and urgent, but I can’t kiss him back. Not until I know what this is about. I pull back, hating the hurt look that flashes across his face. “Just tell me what you did, Dylan. Please.” More tears spring forth, and I’m powerless to stop the flow.

  “A group of girls joined us later in the night, and one of them got a bit clingy with me.”

  A sob bursts free, and the ache in my chest transforms, scalding me from the inside. “Baby, I didn’t touch her. I swear to you, but I was a little too slow removing her wandering hands.”

  “What exactly does that mean?”

  He drags a hand through his hair, and a pained expression crosses his face. “She was running her hands up and down my chest. I was trashed, and I didn’t notice at first. It was only when she grabbed my crotch and started stroking my cock that I realized what was happening.”

  Bile floods my mouth, and I want to scream at him for letting any girl put her hands on him, but I force my words back down, waiting to hear all of it.

  “Slater appeared at our table then. I hadn’t seen him come in, but, apparently, he’d seen me. He saw her hand on my cock, added two plus two, and came up with fifty. I told the girl to go, and then Slater and I got into it. He refused to believe me, and I told him to fuck off and mind his own business. He told me to tell you and threatened that he would if I didn’t man up.” His eyes scan my face. “That’s what we’ve been arguing about. Every time I see him, he asks if I’ve told you.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”