Tender Torment

by Jane Archer

  Chapter 20

  Jake awoke just as the sun was rising. He cursed himself for oversleeping. There was too much to do—he had to get those cattle ready for the drive. He got out of bed, and swiftly put on his clothing. Lamar was waiting for him in the main room, already dressed and ready.

  "Morning, Jake," Lamar said, noticing his hastily donned clothes and sleepy expression. Jake hadn't slept late since—he couldn't remember when. The girl made her presence known even when she slept. It was interesting, he thought, watching Jake closely. He'd never seen Jake so affected by a girl and wondered if it would change him.

  "Let's eat down at the chuck wagon," Jake said as he buckled on his gun and grabbed his hat.

  "What about Alexandra?"

  "She can come down later so Cookie can teach her something about cooking."

  Lamar nodded. "Why don't I wait here awhile. There are some things I could do, and then I could bring her down. She'll awaken soon, I imagine."

  "All right. That suits me. By the way, did Rosa leave any of her things around here? Alex is going to need some clothes to wear."

  "I'll see what I can find."

  "Good." Jake put on his hat and walked out.

  Sun was flooding the room when Alexandra awoke from her deep sleep. She was instantly alert and apprehensive. Her memories of the day before came flooding back and she cautiously turned in the bed. Jake was gone! She felt a strange emptiness at his absence. She got up. He'd be somewhere about, waiting to give her orders for the day so she might as well be dressed and ready when he came back for her.

  Hurriedly, she splashed water on her face, and put on the riding habit and boots. Even if it was hot, her body was completely concealed, and in Jake's presence that was certainly necessary.

  The house was strangely quiet and Alexandra wandered out of her room, curious. She went to the kitchen. Someone had taken the beans off the fire. They looked good, and she suddenly felt hunger gnaw at her stomach. Grabbing up a bowl and spoon, she helped herself generously to the beans and began eating. Surprisingly, they were good, or else she was so hungry anything would have tasted delicious.

  There was a sound near her and she looked up to see Lamar Jarmon coming toward her. Surprisingly, he looked a great deal like Giles and she felt herself stiffen automatically. Was Giles looking for her now, and Stan, too? She couldn't let them find her, but was being Jake's whore any better than what they offered? She shook her head, her green eyes troubled as she tried to cast the men from her mind. Thinking of her situation only made her unhappy and confused.

  "You're looking very rested this morning, Alexandra," Lamar said as he approached her, bearing something in his hands.

  She smiled at him. "I slept well. What do you have there?" she asked.

  "I think these might fit. Rosa left them. It's what the peasant women wear and it's appropriate to the heat here. Jake and I thought you might be more comfortable in them around the hacienda."

  "Oh?" Alexandra asked, immediately interested. So this is what Rosa wore.

  She shook out the bundle to discover a white peasant blouse and a brightly patterned skirt. It was perfect, no matter that it wasn't what she was accustomed to, or that they had belonged to Rosa. She could cook and clean in them without being hot or encumbered. In fact, she looked forward to wearing something so comfortable and uninhibited. Looking up at Lamar, Alexandra smiled her rare, sweet smile and was rewarded by an answering smile from him.

  "It's just perfect, thank you. I'll change right now."

  "I wouldn't change just yet, Alexandra," Lamar said, halting her movement.

  "Why not? Aren't I supposed to clean the rest of the hacienda? It certainly needs it."

  He shook his head. "Jake wants you down at the roundup. Cookie's there and he wants you to learn how to cook first of all."

  "Cookie? Roundup?" Alexandra asked.

  "I'll tell you on the way," Lamar said. "Just come as you are. You'll be riding and that'll be best."

  Outside, Alexandra dubiously regarded the horse Lamar had chosen for her.

  "This is a mustang," Lamar explained. "They roam wild over Texas, but this mare has been broken. I think you'll like her since she's small and sturdy. I'm sorry we don't have a sidesaddle."

  "I can manage if we don't have to go too far."

  "Good."

  Lamar helped her up and soon they were on their way. There was a majestic beauty about the land—so free and open. She found herself liking it even more and more as they rode along. Lamar didn't seem to be in a hurry and they rode side by side, the horses walking. The sun was warm on her face and the air was clean and fresh. She knew a person could feel free here. Except that she wasn't, not really.

  "Alexandra, I know this all must be very strange to you, especially the situation with Jake. I'm even more confused than you are and I'd like to say that I don't approve of the way Jake is treating you. But he is a grown man and I haven't felt that I should interfere. But, Alexandra, I am curious about you. Would you like to tell me how you came to be here and what you know about Jake's mother?"

  Alexandra sighed, then said, "My story is a little unusual, but you should know, I believe." And then she told him her story, leaving out those incidents that would embarrass them both.

  When she finished, Lamar understand some things much better; other things were more unclear. If what she'd said was true, she was a wealthy woman of a fine family. Then what the hell was Jake treating her like a slut for?

  "I'm glad you came, Alexandra, and I know that when Jake cools off, he'd like to hear this from you."

  "I hope so. His mother wanted him to know. And something else, Lamar. Mister Jarmon, your father, died the same day. They're both buried in the family cemetery."

  "So he finally gave up," Lamar said, his jaw tightening. "There was no love lost between us, Alexandra. He'll be happier. He couldn't have lived with the defeat of the South."

  "Giles is closing the plantation and moving some of the furniture into a townhouse in New Orleans."

  Lamar laughed shortly. "That sounds like Giles. He always did prefer the city life. Well, fortunately, it's no concern of mine now."

  "There's nothing left there any more."

  "Do you have any proof of this story?"

  Alexandra frowned. "You don't believe me?"

  "It's not that. The story's too incredible for you to have made it up, but Jake may not."

  "I have the medallion Eleanor gave me. The Norwegian one. She wanted me to have it."

  Lamar whistled. "Eleanor gave you that? She prized it more than anything. It was all she had left of her father."

  "I know, but she looked on me as her daughter."

  "Yes, I can see why. I'm glad you were with her at the end. You might show it to Jake when you tell him."

  "I will." She paused, then hesitantly continued. "Lamar, could you help me to get away? Jake hates me, and once I've told him, there's no more reason for me to stay. I, I could go to Brownsville for a while. I have some friends there—"

  Lamar looked at her kindly. "Of course I'll help. Jake shouldn't be treating you this way, but I can't stop him. We're building up a herd to drive to Kansas and we'll be driving it to San Antonio in about three weeks. If you'll stay with us that long, we can leave you safely in San Antonio. I have friends there who would see that you got to Brownsville."

  "Yes, that would be fine. I could wait." In fact, she preferred to wait safely at the Bar J for she didn't think Stan or Giles would find her there. "But, but would Jake let me go then? He's determined to hurt me."

  "I don't think Jake knows what he's going to do, but if he doesn't want to leave you, I'll arrange it so that you get safely away. It's the least I can do for you. I'm sorry I can't do something sooner."

  "Oh, no, it's fine. I'll be all right. Thank you, Lamar."

  They rode in silence for a while longer, and soon they reached the camp. "Oh!" Alexandra exclaimed. "There are so many cows."

  Lamar smiled. "We're roun
ding up all we can, then bringing them in here to be branded for the road."

  Lamar guided her away from the cattle and toward the chuck wagon. The wagon was a covered affair with several drawers on the back side which contained the cook's supplies and food.

  Cookie looked up as they approached. He stepped forward, wiping his hands on the big white apron he wore.

  "So, this is the little lady Jake told me about. He didn't tell me you'd be so pretty. Welcome, miss. You can call me Cookie. I hear you want to learn to cook so I guess I'll be teachin' you."

  Alexandra liked him right away. He was an older man with a full set of shaggy gray whiskers, and his brown eyes twinkled merrily. She smiled back at him and he beamed even broader. She felt instantly that he was a friend and warmed to him.

  "Thank you, Cookie, and please call me Alexandra."

  "Ain't much to it. On a drive, don't cook much more than coffee, beef and sourdough biscuits. Today, I'm making a stew. That's always a special treat. I'll show you how. Ain't hard. Ain't hard at all."

  "Thank you," Alexandra said graciously, beginning to roll up her sleeves.

  "I'll be leaving you now, Alexandra. You'll be in good hands with Cookie," Lamar said, then touched his hand to his hat before quickly walking away.

  The morning sped by as Cookie showed Alexandra how to cook. She was an apt pupil and enjoyed his company as he regaled her with tales of the trail and the cowboys.

  He explained that everything a cowboy wore was necessary to his trade. He might look like he was dressed in a strange get-up to a tenderfoot, but it was all necessary to droving. The tall, broad brimmed sombrero protected him from the sun and rain, the lariat was for roping, his gun protected him from Indians, rustlers, rattlesnakes and numerous other enemies, the chaps protected his legs when on horseback, which was most of the time, gauntlets were necessary to protect his hands and wrists from rope burns, and his high top boots with high heels protected him against rattlesnake bites and held him in the stirrups.

  Alexandra found it all fascinating, and she began to long for a closer look at these men and their activities.

  When the cooking was finished, she said to Cookie, "Do you suppose I could go over to the corrals and have a look? I wouldn't get in the way."

  "Don't know why not, Miss Alexandra."

  Alexandra smiled and said, "Thank you for everything, Cookie. You've been a gold mine of information, and I'll go back to the hacienda soon and try out what you've taught me."

  Cookie smiled back at her, then turned to resume his chores. She walked away from him, adjusting her small hat, wishing it would give her skin more protection from the glaring sun. She should use a sombrero or she'd soon be as dark as the cowboys. She walked back to her pony. It was still waiting, languid in the hot Texas sun. She struggled to mount, accustomed to help, then finally made it up. The saddle was uncomfortable, but soon she would be used to it.

  Trotting her mustang over toward the corrals, she found the one Cookie had pointed out. Several cowboys were standing around. She got down, then approached the wooden fence. The cowboys stopped their activities, staring at her.

  "What's happening in there?" she asked as she came up to the corral.

  "Bronc busting, miss," one told her.

  She scarcely heard his words as she realized that it was Jake on the bucking, twisting wild pony's back. She couldn't believe what she saw. He held on to a single rope, one hand flung out as the animal moved in impossible contortions around the corral. She leaned closer, feeling the rough wood against her hands and the sun hot on her body. She'd never felt so alive, watching the man and animal joined as one and yet fighting each other to gain supremacy. It was superb and Alexandra felt something stirring within her, a deep, purely animal pleasure in what she watched. Jake looked so completely masculine, so determined, so strong, and the animal was beautiful, also determined to be strong and free. Her breath came more quickly, nothing seemed to exist for her except the battle between the two wild things before her. She wanted to become a part of the scene, share the complete abandon of nature. As she watched the struggle, she began to see the change. The wild mustang slowed, still trying to throw his rider, but his strength was spent and slowly his bucking, twisting movements ceased, until Jake rode him quietly around the corral.

  Only then did he see Alexandra. The horse had been a hard one. None of the others had been able to break the mustang, but Jake's foul humor had enabled him to ride the horse into submission. Alexandra had been in his mind as he'd ridden; he'd imagined that he was breaking her to his will. And then, when the mustang finally had been broken, he'd looked up to see her standing there: her crazy hat off to one side, her hands gripping the wooden rail, and her eyes burning like green fire.

  He wanted her in that moment more than he had ever wanted her before. He had to make her his own, just as he'd made the horse his own. Tossing the rope to one of the boys, he got off, hardly feeling the strained muscles in his body as he bent low to crawl between the railings to Alexandra. His eyes never left her and as he stood beside her, he could smell her warm, sweet fragrance. He took her hands, their eyes caught together, and led her away.

  They rode back to the hacienda in silence. No words were necessary. Alexandra knew what he wanted and she admitted to herself, for the first time, that she wanted the same thing.

  Jake helped her dismount, his hands never leaving her waist as he guided her into the house, to the bedroom. He turned toward Alexandra. She still watched him with her wide, hungry green eyes. He'd never seen her look at him like this and it excited him beyond control.

  As he began to undo her riding habit, she didn't move, but stared at him as if she'd never seen him before. He quickly removed his own clothing. When he looked back, she was in the bed, a strange, haunted look in her soft green eyes. Soft. Yes, they were soft, dark, like moss on a river bank.

  He slid into bed, and pulled her to him. This time she didn't fight as the fire between them burst into a raging inferno.

  Chapter 21

  Alexandra threw a few more ingredients into the bubbling water in the iron kettle, she was angry, furious with herself. How pliable she was. How weak! She should have known that Jake's regard for her couldn't change. So he had taken her with more tenderness than usual, and she had let him—invited him, really. But then, as soon as he had used her, he was up and dressed, dismissing her as he would a common whore. She was a fool for caring!

  Alexandra had her hands in the middle of a bucket of water, rinsing out a rag to clean the kitchen when she heard a horse neigh outside. She saw a mustang tied outside. She walked out into the main room.

  Standing in the middle of the room was a pretty young Mexican girl with her hands on her hips. She wore peasant clothing similar to Alexandra's, and her full young breasts strained against her white blouse, the nipples dark shadows against the thin cloth. The girl regarded Alexandra haughtily.

  Alexandra, in confusion, took a few more steps into the room, then stopped and said, "May I help you? Are you looking for someone?"

  The girl's face twisted viciously. "I found who I'm looking for, gringa bitch!" she spat.

  "Oh, I see," Alexandra said, smiling softly, "You must be Rosa."

  "I suppose he told you about me."

  "Well, Pecos—"

  "Pecos! I don't mean that fool. I mean Jake."

  Alexandra raised her brows, her eyes glowing slightly. "Jake?"

  "Yes, my man, you bitch. I came to see you. Pecos said you were here."

  "I'm not surprised. He did try to rape me, you know. I believe it had something to do with you."

  "Rape you? Ha! He wouldn't want a skinny little gringa like you. Neither would Jake. You've bewitched him, haven't you?" she asked, her eyes narrowing as she stepped closer.

  "Bewitched? Really, Rosa, don't be silly." Alexandra's attitude was amusement at the Mexican girl's rage, and only served to further infuriate Rosa.

  "Then why would they want you?"

  Alexa
ndra shrugged. She had little interest in discussing these two men with a girl, an angry girl. Still, it was interesting to see another of Jake's previous women. The girl was pretty, voluptuous, and very young, perhaps sixteen. He had good taste, she had to admit, remembering the beautiful Madame LeBlanc and the seductive Caroline.

  "Look," the young girl said, stepping closer, "Jake belongs to me, Rosa. We had an argument. I left and took Pecos as my new man, but it was only to make Jake jealous. He's my man. You understand?"

  Alexandra shrugged. "So?"

  "So! I want you gone. Leave. Go! Get out of Texas before I scratch out your eyes!"

  Alexandra laughed, a patronizing sound. "Listen to me, Rosa," she said softly. "I'm here and I'm going to stay as long as I want. Not you nor anyone is going to tell me what to do. And another thing, Jake's not your man any longer."

  The girl's eyes grew wide with rage. Without warning, she leaped on Alexandra, pulling at her hair, trying to scratch, kick, claw. But Alexandra had had a little experience in New Orleans, and she had some tricks of her own.

  They rolled over and over on the floor, hitting furniture, slipping on rugs as they fought, tearing at each other's clothing. Rosa fought like a shecat, bent on revenge, determined to mar Alexandra, and so ruin the appeal she had for the man she wanted. She savagely dug her hands into Alexandra's long golden red hair, pulling until Alexandra slapped her across the face.

  Rosa got up on her knees, her black eyes flashing. "So, the gringa can fight. I'm surprised, but it's no matter. I'll see you dead for this. Dead, do you hear?"

  "I hear, you little bitch, but if I catch you around here again, I'll finish you myself. And if you ever go near Jake again, I'll mark your face so that no man will want to look at you again," Alexandra hissed, her breasts heaving.

  Rosa was holding her blouse together in front as she gasped for air. Then, suddenly, she dropped the torn cloth, exposing her round swelling breasts, the dark nipples hard. She ran past Alexandra to the door.