Live to See Tomorrow

by Iris Johansen

  “I’m happy to have you.” Her white teeth flashed as she smiled. “Hu Chang always brings me wonderful surprises.” Her brow knitted as she stared at Erin. “I’ve seen you before. Or perhaps a photo?”

  “Perhaps,” Erin said. “I’m a journalist, but in this day and age, the journalist is sometimes part of the story. It shouldn’t be that way, but that’s the way it is.”

  Celia turned to Luke. “And you’re such a handsome young man. But you’re also probably much more complex and interesting since Hu Chang brought you. Welcome.”

  “Thank you.” Luke was smiling awkwardly, and he was looking at Celia with a bedazzled expression.

  Catherine stared at him in bemusement. Good God, even boys as young and cool as Luke fell under Celia’s spell.

  “We’ve had a long trip, Celia,” Hu Chang said. “I’d be grateful if you could furnish us with rooms and hot showers.”

  “Of course.” She gestured toward the exquisite wrought-iron staircase. “There are several bedrooms on the upper floor. I assume you’ll wish to be close together if there are difficulties. You take the room I usually give you, Hu Chang. Perhaps Ms. Sullivan and Catherine Ling could share the second suite. There are two queen beds in that apartment. And let young Luke take the next room down the hall.” She waved a hand. “You know where everything is, Hu Chang. Why don’t you take Ms. Sullivan and Luke up and get them settled?” She smiled at Catherine. “Will you come to the kitchen and help me make a pot of tea? We can take it up to them.”

  Catherine nodded. “If you like.”

  “I do like.” Celia whirled and headed down the hall. “Come along.”

  Catherine glanced at Hu Chang and shrugged. “I’ll see you later. I guess I’m on kitchen duty.”

  “I expected that Celia wouldn’t let you disappear right away.” He gestured for Luke and Erin to go before him up the stairs. “Did I mention that she’s very curious?”

  He didn’t wait for an answer before he started up the stairs.

  Catherine gazed after him for a moment before turning and heading after Celia.

  The kitchen was all stainless steel and exotic granites, beautiful woods and soft lights glowing in crystal chandeliers.

  Celia was already pouring water into a huge brass carafe. “You don’t mind helping me, do you? If you’re tired, I can do it myself.”

  “You seem to be doing it yourself anyway. Why am I here?”

  “You’re very blunt.” Celia looked up and smiled. “Because I can’t resist getting to know you. I’ve heard of you for many years.”

  “From Hu Chang?”

  “Yes, he doesn’t come to see me often, but when he does, there is usually a mention of Catherine. He regards you as his dear friend. Hu Chang does not make many friends.” She set the tea to brewing. “And I decided I must make sure you’re worthy of his friendship.”

  Catherine smiled. She was finding the woman’s frankness appealing. “And how am I to prove it to you?”

  “Tell me what you feel for him.” Celia looked her directly in the eye. “I will know if you lie. I have great experience with liars.”

  “What do I feel for him?” Catherine was silent, thinking. “I think he’s part of me, but it’s a part that I may never know completely. He’s my friend who will never leave me, who will never let me know loneliness, who can finish my sentences almost before I begin them. He came to me when I was just struggling to stay alive and taught me why staying alive was important. How to reach out and grasp the joy of every moment. I’ve put my life on the line to save him, and I would do it again tomorrow.” She ended simply, “Because I would not want to live in a world that held no Hu Chang.”

  “Very eloquent,” Celia said slowly. Then a warm smile lit her face. “But truthful, I think. I believe Hu Chang is safe with you.”

  “I’m glad you’re satisfied.”

  “Not entirely. Do you sleep with him?”

  Catherine blinked. “No, I told you, he’s my friend.”

  She shrugged. “Friends sometimes make the very best lovers. They care about your pleasure. That’s very important. You have a son. Was your relationship with your husband very close? Was he your friend as well as your lover?”

  “You have no right to ask me that.”

  “But the fact that you don’t want to answer indicates that he might have been one but not the other,” Celia said shrewdly. “I will make my own guess which it is.”

  “Terry was a wonderful man, older, but a good lover. He was my mentor when I first became an agent with the CIA. We wanted the same things, a home, a child, a normal life.”

  “He was a friend,” Celia said triumphantly. “I knew it.”

  “How nice that you can make a judgment on my marriage from only a few words,” Catherine said dryly.

  “I’m very clever about reading people. I’ve had to be. My life has been filled with men who lie and cheat to get what they want. I’ve learned to know how to keep them from getting it,” Celia said. “Ask Hu Chang.”

  “I’d rather ask you,” Catherine said boldly. “You’ve had no compunction about asking me personal things. Now it’s my turn.”

  Celia’s brows rose. “You think I’ll object? Not now that I know that Hu Chang has reason to trust you. I’m not ashamed of anything I’ve done in my life. Go ahead, ask me.”

  “Did you sleep with Hu Chang?”

  She threw back her head and laughed. “I knew that was coming. You’re as curious about me and I am about you. No, I did not. Though I did offer and was refused. I think that, in spite of the fact that he’s very worldly and the wisest man I’ve ever known, he’s burdened by a conscience. I couldn’t convince him that I wasn’t offering out of gratitude.”

  “Why did you offer?”

  “He’s exciting, like a mystery that has no end. He’d be a very good lover. I wanted to try him…” She shrugged. “But it’s probably better that I didn’t. I have a tendency to try to control men. That wouldn’t work with Hu Chang. And if it did, he would no longer be my friend.”

  “I don’t think you’d need to worry. Hu Chang can’t be controlled.”

  “I don’t think so either. But sex is everything, sex rules the world. I’ve only met two men since I discovered that truth who I wasn’t able to control with sex.” She grinned. “It was a devastating blow to my ego, but I recovered.”

  “Who were they?”

  Celia shook her head. “I don’t reveal names. All my clients are confidential. They can trust me.”

  Catherine was silent a moment.

  “Ask it,” Celia said softly. “It always comes down to this question. Ask it.”

  “Why are you doing this? You’re obviously very bright. Hu Chang gave you money. You could have gone to school and become anything you wished.”

  “This is what I wish,” Celia said quietly. “When Hu Chang took me away from that bordello in Calcutta, I was very grateful, but not for the reason you would think. I didn’t consider myself a victim whose body was raped and ravaged, a helpless sex slave. Yes, I felt that way when I was sold to Li Pradka. The first month was hell. But then I discovered something that I hadn’t known about myself. I didn’t hate what was being done to me anymore. I was liking it … I was loving it.”

  “What?”

  “You’re shocked. I can’t help that I don’t think like you. I’m intensely sexual. I need sex. I learned to divorce myself from the individual and just enjoy the act. The only thing I hated was that I had to take, not give.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “I had to submit and respond. I don’t like submission. I wanted to be the one in control. I wanted to be so good at what I was doing that my partner would do anything to keep me from stopping. So I took another step and began to learn how to be that good. I talked to prostitutes at the bordello, I experimented, I read books. From the Kama Sutra to Marquis De Sade. I studied sexual pleasure in all forms. Some I liked, some I didn’t. But I learned them all, and in the end,
I made them my own.” She got a tray down from the cabinet. “I wasn’t a victim by the time Hu Chang decided to rescue me. Any man who went to bed with me played by my rules because he knew the rewards. He was eager to let me guide the play. Occasionally, I was sent someone who was so twisted that I had a few problems, but I found a way to keep him subdued.” Her tone was without emotion. “But it pointed out that I had to get away from Li Pradka. I was very grateful when Hu Chang took me away from Calcutta.” She took out an exquisite teapot of Chinese origin. “Isn’t this lovely? It was a gift from a sheik from Kuwait. I usually don’t accept gifts. A sum is just paid into my bank account for a designated period. Additional gifts sometime makes the client feel that he’s the giver. But this pot is very old, priceless, and it pleased me.”

  “It’s amazing.” And so was Celia. Her frankness was only matched by her cheerful matter-of-factness. “And did the sheik please you?”

  She chuckled. “When I schooled him a little. One of the reasons I enjoy the first time is that it stimulates my mind as well as gives me release. By the second time, I know to what lengths of excess I can drive him that will make him mine.”

  “You speak as if your clients are stallions.”

  “They all think they are. And if I can make them go away believing that they’re the greatest stallion in the barn, then I’ve done my job.”

  “And you actually don’t mind being—”

  “A whore?”

  “Hu Chang calls you a courtesan. But I’m having trouble distinguishing the differences.”

  “Most people do. Economically, it means that I’m paid enormous amounts of money. I can demand a price for a night or two that would buy an apartment building. For a week, the price is enough to enrich my investment portfolio to the tune of over a million. I’ve slept with some of the richest and most influential men in the world.” She poured water over the tea leaves. “The difference for me is that I have a vocation and a skill and that I enjoy my life. I enjoy sex.” She paused. “And I can’t do without it. I need it frequently and varied. I tried to slack off for a while after I came to San Francisco. I even went to a therapy group. But they were all too gloomy and troubled. I wasn’t either. So I figured I could make a better life without them. And I did. I’m doing very well. I hired a private investigator, who is also my agent. At first it went slowly, but then word spread.” She made a face. “Don’t let anyone tell you that men don’t talk if they’ve found a fantastic lay. I made sure it was discreet, and my investigator checked out every client to make sure that I wouldn’t run into something I couldn’t handle.”

  “Which doesn’t appear to be likely.”

  “It wasn’t. After these last years, I have a fat stock-market portfolio that assures me security and I’m very, very wealthy.”

  “But still not tempted to retire.”

  “Why should I? I told you, it’s my vocation … and my pleasure. I love every minute of the sex act. It’s hard to explain to you—” She searched for words. “I’m … superb. You can’t imagine the power. There’s no one better at what I do. Sex means everything to men. It’s like being a queen.”

  “Just so you don’t abuse that power.”

  “I’ve never been tempted. I don’t need to play those games.” She set lemon, cream, and sugar on the tray. “I’ll take the tray. You get the door.” She glanced at Catherine as she picked up the tray. “How do you feel about me now after our little chat?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Pity? Disgust? Threatened? Some women feel antagonistic toward my profession.”

  “I don’t feel any of those emotions. I still don’t understand, but I’m trying. My mother was a whore, and I grew up on the docks where she and her friends plied their trade. All I knew was despair and drugs and men who hurt my mother. The life killed her when I was a little girl. She was a true victim. I’ve never run across anyone on the other end of the scale.”

  “I’m sorry,” Celia said gently. “I know that was hard for you. I’ve been there. It tends to scar…” She moved toward the staircase. “Do you have trouble with sex now? I’ll help if you like.”

  Catherine blinked. “What?”

  “You saw only the women around you as sex slaves. I’ll teach you a few tricks and moves that will ensure that will never happen to you.”

  Catherine chuckled. “A queen, not a slave?”

  “Exactly. It won’t take long. You won’t be anywhere near as expert as I am, but you’ll be extraordinary.”

  “Thank you for the offer,” she said solemnly. “But I believe I’ll pass.”

  “If you change your mind…” She started up the stairs. “I was troubled that your husband was a friend, not lover. I thought that there might be a problem. I know Hu Chang wishes only the best for you. I thought I might help give it to you.”

  “If I decide I need to be queen of the bedroom, I’ll let you know.” She was silent, then said, “I’m truly not unappreciative. You have a good heart, Celia.”

  “That’s true,” Celia said. “And I think you may, too. We will become good friends and give each other many gifts.”

  “But you don’t accept gifts.”

  “Only from friends. Knock on that first door. We will let Hu Chang set up this tray and call Erin Sullivan and your Luke. We have labored enough.”

  “But I’m certain you took your reward,” Hu Chang said as he opened the door. “Is your curiosity satisfied?”

  “Yes, but it didn’t go only one way.” She handed him the tray. “Catherine was also curious. But now all is well, we’re on our way to friendship, and we both know that you’re safe.”

  “I knew that before.” Hu Chang looked at Catherine. “I called the local hospital and could get no information. So I called Venable and let him probe. Sen is at St. James Hospital. Two men are dead. Jack Sen is wounded but not badly.”

  “Thank God. Though who knows what will happen to him once the police start questioning him.”

  “Police?” Celia asked. “Serious trouble then, Hu Chang?”

  “Very serious.”

  “Don’t just leave it at that,” Catherine said impatiently. “She should know the danger.” She turned to Celia. “Jack Sen was our pilot. His mother was murdered when they questioned her about where he was bringing us. He could have avoided the people who did it, he chose revenge.” She added bluntly, “I can’t promise you they won’t come after you, too.”

  “I’m glad you told me,” Celia said. “But it won’t change my decision. Running away from anything is always a form of submission. What can I do for you? Do you need a car, a jet, a boat? I have many clients who would be happy to make me happy.”

  “I will let you know,” Hu Chang said. “There are decisions to be made. I’m content that you’re providing us with a place to rest and make those decisions. Now I will go and get Erin and Luke so that they can partake of your wonderful tea.” He paused at the door. “Venable said to tell you his own decision still stands, Catherine.” He gazed at her inquiringly. “And that decision was?”

  “He wants to cut Erin loose.” She poured tea into a cup. “I won’t let him do it. I just have to figure out a way to force the issue.”

  “Another decision to be made.” He moved silently down the hall. But the next moment, they heard him open a door, and call, “It is time for tea, Luke. You will enjoy it. Your hostess is expert at many, many wonderful skills, and that is one of them.”

  “What else does she do?” Luke asked as he moved down the hall. “Besides tea, I mean.”

  “She knows many exciting, intricate secrets. Perhaps, if you’re very polite and kind, she will show them to you someday.”

  “Oh, Lord,” Catherine murmured.

  “Not before eighteen.” Celia’s eyes were sparkling with mischief. She tilted her head consideringly. “Or maybe sixteen if he is ready…”

  * * *

  Catherine and Erin’s suite had been dark for nearly thirty minutes, but Catherine knew Erin wa
sn’t sleeping. She could hear the sound of her restless movements and light, shallow breathing in the next bed.

  “Catherine?”

  “I’m awake. But I hoped you’d give it up and go to sleep.”

  “I can’t sleep. What are we going to do about Jack Sen?”

  “We’ll think of something. His life could be ruined if the police arrest him, and he has to go through that nightmare. Venable can make people disappear if he needs it to happen. Maybe I can convince him that he needs Sen to be whisked off the scene.”

  “Maybe.” Erin was silent. “I was really happy that I was away from that damned palace. I was almost giddy. But I’m coming down now. Death. Everywhere I turn, there’s death. And it’s all connected to me.”

  “I won’t deny you’re the center, but I’d stake my life that you’re not responsible for one particle of it.”

  “I am, you know.” Her voice was faint in the darkness. “I wore the necklace. Cameron told me not to wear it.”

  Catherine stiffened. “He did?”

  “He said to keep it safe and send it to him if I needed him or if I changed my mind.”

  It was the first time that Erin had indicated that Catherine’s guesswork might have a basis in fact. Don’t push it. Keep everything low-key. “Changed your mind?”

  “I wanted to change my mind. I really did. Such a beautiful dream. You’d think it was beautiful, too.”

  “Would I?”

  “But you can’t believe in dreams, can you? You’re afraid that they’ll interfere with your reality. I was like that once. Hell, I’m a journalist. I deal in facts. But since I’ve been working in Tibet, I’ve been changing. The life is so simple, it has a kind of purity. It lures you into thinking that all life should be clean and simple, with rules that everyone obeys. A world without men like Kadmus and countries that want to blow everyone to kingdom come.”

  “That’s the way it should be,” Catherine said. “But you’re right, it’s only a beautiful dream.” She had to move slowly, carefully. “Why would Cameron tell you not to wear that necklace?”

  “He was trying to protect me. He said that he couldn’t be sure that it would be safe for me.” She was silent a moment. “I know you want me to tell you everything, but I can’t do it. I don’t have that right. But you’ve risked your life for me. Your son’s at risk now, too. I can’t treat you as if you were a stranger. I trust you. I consider you my friend.”