Spy Dog: Superbrain

by Andrew Cope

  Andrew Cope

  SPY DOG: SUPERBRAIN

  Illustrated by James de la Rue

  PUFFIN

  Contents

  1. Royal Flush

  2. Disco Dog

  3. The Brain Game

  4. Pet Shop Adventures

  5. A Top-secret Secret

  6. Ben’s School Daze

  7. Listening In

  8. The New Recruit

  9. Clever Clogs

  10. Game On

  11. A Pain in the Backside

  12. Keeping the Secret

  13. Saving Ben

  14. Bent Double With Payne

  15. Room Service

  16. Tickets, Please?

  17. First-class Spying

  18. Tunnel Vision

  19. Weird Science

  Acknowledgements

  PUFFIN BOOKS

  SPY DOG: SUPERBRAIN

  Andrew Cope lives in the middle of England. He’s lucky enough to have two pet pigs and a dog called Lara. The pigs are very clever but have never had a book written about them. ‘Spy Pig’ just doesn’t sound right.

  His dog isn’t so clever. Or at least, she doesn’t show it. Which got Andrew wondering whether she was just hiding it? Could Lara be undercover as a secret agent? Perhaps she’s just pretending to be stupid? Maybe her sticky-up ear means she’s always on alert? And besides, ‘Spy Dog’ sounds like a much better title.

  If you would like Andrew to visit your school, please email him at andy@artofbrilliance.co.uk. He may even be able to bring Lara!

  Books by Andrew Cope

  Spy Dog

  Spy Dog 2

  Spy Dog Unleashed!

  Spy Dog Superbrain

  For my favourite mum and dad

  1. Royal Flush

  ‘It’s boring,’ yawned Ollie. ‘I mean, we’ve been waiting ages.’

  ‘Shush,’ hissed Mum, adjusting her hat. ‘It’s not boring. It’s the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to us. It’s not every day that you get to meet the Queen.’

  The Cook family waited patiently, Ollie passing the time by picking his nose. The Queen was working her way down the line, politely chatting to all the award winners. ‘She’s nearly here,’ gasped Mum out of the side of her mouth. ‘Best behaviour, everyone.’

  Ben and Sophie smoothed their clothes and stood straight, tummies in, chests out. Ben quickly cupped his hand and put it to his face, checking his breath. He didn’t want to breathe pickled onions on Her Majesty.

  Ollie rolled his eyes and sighed. He stuck his finger up his nose and rummaged around as he watched the elderly lady gradually move closer. Before he knew it she was talking to his family, shaking their hands. Dad was actually introducing him to the Queen! Ollie did his best photograph smile and bowed, like he’d practised. Now Dad was asking him to shake hands with the Queen. ‘Er, but, Dad,’ he said, thinking of what was on the end of his finger.

  ‘No “buts”, mate.’ Dad frowned. ‘Your Majesty, I’d like you to meet our youngest, Oliver. He’s only four but played an important role in capturing the villains.’

  The Queen bent down and her face broke into a warm royal smile. She took Ollie’s hand and shook it. Ollie thought he saw her smile fade as she felt something sticky on the end of his finger. She quickly got out a hankie from the small bag she was carrying. Then she opened her mouth to speak, but Ollie couldn’t wait to be spoken to. ‘You look just like the lady on the stamps,’ he beamed. The Queen opened her mouth again, but Ollie carried on. ‘And I’ve been wondering – have you got a PlayStation? I bet you’ve got every game in the world,’ he added. ‘And have you ever had anyone’s head chopped off?’

  ‘That’s a lot of questions,’ said the Queen. She flashed a confused smile and turned her attention to Ollie’s older brother. ‘And you are … Benjamin,’ she noted, looking at his name badge. ‘Tell me about your adventures, young man.’

  Ollie watched as his brother flushed bright red. He stammered a few words before Dad stepped in. ‘All three of our children have been involved in catching the criminal gang, Ma’am. But the key to it all is our special dog, Lara.’

  The family pet wagged her tail furiously. She stood on her hind legs and did her very best curtsey. Her Majesty shook the dog’s paw. ‘I’ve heard a lot about you, Lara,’ beamed the Queen. ‘I know, for instance, that “Lara” stands for “Licensed Assault and Rescue Animal”. Or should that be “GM451”? My Prime Minister has kept me informed. He tells me you are the world’s first superdog. A spy, no less,’ she chuckled. ‘What a fantastic thing to be. My Prime Minister also says you are top secret, though.’ Lara watched as the Queen swept her hand along the line of award winners. ‘So all the others will get their faces in the papers, but you must remain anonymous. What a shame.’ The Queen turned her attention back to Ben. ‘Maybe you will get some glory one day, but I suppose Lara is like a real-life superhero. She has to keep her identity secret. It must be jolly exciting.’

  Jolly exciting indeed, agreed Lara, wagging her tail. Just glad to be of service.

  ‘Yes … it is,’ Ben replied nervously.

  The head of state did her best royal smile and continued to wipe her fingers on a hankie. ‘We already have 007. Does that make Lara 00K9?’ chortled the Queen, proud of her joke.

  The family laughed, perhaps a little too heartily, except for Ollie. ‘I don’t get it,’ complained the youngest member of the family.

  ‘Ah, he is not amused,’ remarked the Queen, attempting another royal joke. ‘Well, get this, young man. I’ll make sure that you and your family have a small reward for capturing the criminal gang.’

  No need, Ma’am, thought Lara. Capturing criminals is all in a day’s work and family life is the only reward I need.

  ‘And, of course, you must all stay for tea at the Palace,’ suggested the Queen, smiling. ‘My husband and I love having children in the house.’

  ‘House,’ whispered Sophie to her brother, gazing round at the suits of armour. ‘She calls Buckingham Palace a “house”.’

  Ollie grumbled his way through the next ceremony. Trumpets sounded and the Queen rested a sword on the shoulders of some of the award winners. Ollie couldn’t help noticing that they all seemed very pleased. He was hoping the sword would slip and she’d accidentally chop someone’s head off. ‘Or maybe just an ear,’ he whispered to Mum. ‘Like Henry the Eighth used to do. That would be so cool.’

  Ben nudged his younger brother as Lara stepped forward. ‘She’s the first ever dog to receive such an honour,’ he beamed as they watched the Queen tap a sword on their pet’s shoulders.

  ‘Wow,’ exclaimed Ollie, suddenly taking an interest. ‘And why is she doing it, anyway?’

  ‘Lara captured those baddies and rescued the Millennium Diamond. She’s a hero,’ explained Mum. ‘People who’ve done lots of good things can get knighted. That means they become “sir” somebody-or-other. You know, like “Sir Richard Branson”. Or “Sir Alex Ferguson”.’

  Ollie mulled it over. Next in line was a lady with a huge nose. She stepped forward and the Queen touched her shoulders with a sword. ‘So is she a “sir”?’ asked Ollie, watching the ceremony with growing interest.

  Mum listened carefully to what the Queen was saying. ‘No,’ she smiled. ‘Men become “sirs” but ladies become “dames”. Lara has just become a dame. And that lady has been rewarded because of all the brilliant work she’s done at her school. She’s a head teacher whose school had some of the best exam grades in the country. Imagine! What a fantastic achievement. She’s really earned the honour.’ Mum cast a sideways glance at her youngest son. ‘You have to be a special person to become a sir or dame.’

  But Mum had never been more wrong. The family smiled as
the lady received her damehood from the Queen. Nobody suspected that the head teacher had an evil plan that would plunge Lara and the children into another adventure.

  2. Disco Dog

  There was only one day to go before the six-week school holidays. All the children were excited because Mr Bell had announced it would be a non-uniform day. Ben, Sophie and Ollie were especially thrilled because Lara had been invited to their end-of-year party. She was the guest of honour and would be giving out the awards.

  ‘It’s not very often that your pet dog gets to do this kind of thing,’ Ben explained to his younger brother. ‘Lara is very special,’ he reminded him. ‘For a start, she’s received an honour from the Queen. And not all dogs can play on the PlayStation, strum the guitar and send emails, you know.’ Ollie just shrugged. He wasn’t bothered about Lara’s damehood but he thought it was cool that his pet dog played wrestling games and helped him with his homework.

  It had been an eventful few months. The adventures had all started when the Cooks had adopted Lara from the RSPCA. In fact, they hadn’t adopted Lara at all; she had chosen them as part of her Secret Service mission. And Lara wasn’t even her real name. She went by the code name GM451. The collar round her neck said ‘LARA’ in boldly engraved letters, but it actually stood for ‘Licensed Assault and Rescue Animal’. She was the Secret Service’s biggest achievement. The Queen had been right to describe her as a canine James Bond.

  Lara and the children had soon developed a very special bond. They played, laughed and shared adventures together. The children were delighted to learn that Lara could understand them, even if she couldn’t actually speak. They all loved their pet. Ollie was the youngest and he took his dog’s amazing skills for granted. He was a bright, upbeat boy with a loud voice that he used to talk to anyone, any time, even if they weren’t interested. So, even if Lara could have spoken, she wouldn’t have got a word in edgeways with Ollie.

  Sophie was much quieter and more thoughtful than her younger brother. She had smiley eyes set in a freckle-covered face. Lara spent hours with her, writing stories and drawing pictures. She was the best homework assistant ever, helping Sophie to the top of her class.

  Sophie and Ollie looked to their older brother for guidance and, usually, Ben led them well. He had shot upwards recently and all his clothes were too small. Fortunately, Ben was good-looking and anything he wore suited him. He could probably be in a boy band one day if it wasn’t for his terrible dancing skills.

  All three loved having a pet dog, especially one that was also a secret agent. However, Lara’s special status meant they’d been drawn into some serious scrapes. Things usually turned out OK in the end, but Mum had thrown a few wobblies, especially when the children had been chased by a baddie with a gun. Incredibly, it even turned out well when Lara had been shot. The good news was that it meant she wasn’t fit enough to return to Secret Service work so she had been allowed to stay at the Cooks’ full time. Lara had enjoyed the thrill of life as a secret agent but being a family pet was much better. It was far from boring for her, and she got plenty of thrills as well as oodles of love.

  Lara’s Spy Dog training had been very intensive. The Secret Service had spotted her at an early age and she’d worked one-to-one with an animal scientist, Professor Maximus Cortex. His lifelong work had been to create the world’s first superanimal and he’d achieved his ambition with GM451. He and the Cooks still kept in touch, and the professor had grown very attached to Ben, Sophie and Ollie. The scientist invited Lara back to his secret spy headquarters twice a year. Officially, it was so GM451 could be updated on the latest gadgets but Lara wasn’t fooled. She knew it was so the professor could see the children.

  Lara loved Professor Cortex. He was old and crotchety on the outside but a big softie on the inside. She knew he would never admit it, but she thought he loved her too. Despite her soft spot for the professor, Lara’s life had moved on. His world was one of spies, gadgets, adventure and danger. Her new world was one of walkies, picnics, bike rides and family fun. She had relaxed a bit. The professor’s rules seemed less important since she’d retired from the Secret Service. Her world was now far less dangerous and Lara had bent the rules slightly.

  The Cooks lived in a small village and most of the neighbours knew of Lara’s special abilities. She acted like an old-fashioned sheriff, riding into town and sweeping crime off the streets – the good, the bad and the ugly all rolled into one. Lara had even started an animal neighbourhood watch – training the village pets in basic spy tactics. Occasionally she was invited into the local school to run self-defence classes and she was delighted that the local community had taken her to heart.

  In return for Lara eliminating crime, the villagers had promised to keep her special status a secret. There had been some reporters snooping around a while back, but Lara had seen them off. She’d had a bit of trouble with a diamond robber but he’d ended up behind bars. Lara and the Cooks had had a quiet few months out of danger and that’s how she wanted to keep it.

  Lara had spent most of the day getting ready for the end-of-year party. She’d soaked in a nice warm bath and then got wrapped in her special doggie dressing gown. She chose her favourite CD and turned up the volume, wiggling her hips as she finished getting ready. There would be a disco at the party and Lara wanted to show off some of her doggie moves. Mum had given Lara a good brush and blow-dry. She smelt lovely and looked all fluffy. She cleaned her teeth with Ben’s electric toothbrush and curled her lip in the mirror, running her tongue against her sparkling white fangs. Superb. What marvellous gnashers. She dabbed some of Mum’s perfume behind her ears and finished with a bit of Dad’s hair gel, spiking up her fringe. Lara took a look in the mirror and raised an eyebrow, James Bond style. She saw a black and white dog, Labrador size, with a bullet hole in her upright ear. The diamond on her collar looked a million dollars. Probably because it is, she thought, before admiring her new image. Fantastic, she thought. I love the fluffy look. Rather cool, if I say so myself.

  Lara let herself out of the front door and trotted to school. She arrived just as the bell went, not only signifying the end of the school day but the start of the summer holidays. Excited children poured into the hall where Lara was waiting to greet them. She reserved her biggest, wettest licks for Ben, Sophie and Ollie.

  The party went really well. Lara joined in with most of the dancing, shaking her doggie bottom and strutting her stuff to the beat. She didn’t mean to show off but when she took to the floor and started doing some of the moves she’d practised earlier, everyone clapped and whistled.

  ‘She’s quite a mover,’ one of Ben’s mates shouted to him above the din of the music.

  ‘And look at how brilliantly she plays the air guitar,’ exclaimed another.

  Ben nodded his head in agreement. Watching Lara he still couldn’t believe that this was the end-of-year party and his last term at this school. It wouldn’t be long before he was starting at Chellaston.

  Lara was glad when the disco finished and she could grab a breather and a slurp of squash. She and the children took their seats and Mr Bell got up on stage. He did a terrific speech about how fantastic the children had been all year and then announced the winners of several end-of-year awards. Lara was introduced as the guest of honour and leapt on to the stage to massive applause. She sat proudly, her bullet-holed ear standing to attention, shaking paws with the winners and putting medals around their necks. What a lovely school, thought Lara. And the head teacher is just perfect. The kids love him and all want to do their best. The retired spy dog stood on stage with the winners and did her best doggie smile.

  ‘Say cheeeese,’ sang the photographer.

  I’d prefer sausages, Lara thought as she smiled. The flashbulbs made her blink. What a perfect end to a perfect school year, she beamed.

  3. The Brain Game

  Six smartly dressed teachers sat round the table. It was daytime but the blinds were drawn. Their meeting was top secret.

&nb
sp; The new head teacher was a pencil-shaped lady in a floral dress. She had a sharp face and thin lips that looked incapable of smiling. Her distinguishing feature was a pointy nose, held high so she could peer down at the assembled audience. She tapped her pen on a teacup for attention. ‘Welcome to the first meeting of the school year,’ she announced. ‘I’m so pleased to be at Chellaston School and I hope you will join me in making this institution the best in the country. I have selected you all for this special project because I know you will help me with this dream. Any questions before I proceed?’

  ‘Not a question exactly,’ came a voice from the back. ‘But we’d like to congratulate you on your recent honour at the Palace. We are all very proud of you, Dame Payne.’

  ‘Why, thank you, Mr Wilde.’ She smiled, although secretly she thought she deserved the recognition for her genius. ‘It’s an honour that we can all share as we strive for the same results here. I was very successful at my previous school and I will not be seen to fail here. As I confirmed during our holiday meetings, we have secured funds from our private sponsor to pay for the world’s top scientists to create an intelligence formula. Once it’s ready, our formula will breed superchildren around the globe and we will be rich beyond our wildest dreams.’

  ‘How is the formula coming along?’ asked a lady on the left.

  Dame Payne fiddled with her laptop and an image of a brain was beamed on to the big screen. ‘We’re making excellent progress,’ she purred. ‘It’s basically ready, but our scientists need the final ingredient – the brain tissue from an intelligent child. It has to be quite young. Still growing. This “superbrain” is the key to everything.’ There was silence in the room as the head teacher tapped at her laptop once more. ‘Which brings me to the rules for next term. Results in this school are up across the board.’ Her thin lips turned up at the corners but her eyes remained unsmiling. ‘Congratulations to all members of staff concerned. But, as the new head, I’m telling you that we have to do better,’ she snorted. ‘And the only way to improve the school’s exam results is to work the children even harder. Only then will we have the superbrain we need.’